F3 New Orleans

Tag: Zoolander

  • First Ever Northshore F3/FiA Mixer – from Cowbell

    If you ask someone that rhymes with mushtacker when is the best time to post a back blast, he would probably say within 5 minutes of it ending. I, on the other hand, like some time, a week give or take, to reflect on what the workout meant to me and the pax.

    Just kidding, I’ve been busy, and enjoy making mushtacker wait to see in writing form what it is he did himself.

    25 pax met at the Covington trailhead for the first ever joint F3/FiA workout

    COP #1 Warm Up (all IC X20)
    SSH, Seal Jacks, IW, Arm Circles (F/B), Toe Touches, OH Arm Claps, Mtn climbers, Windmills

    The Thang
    Tabata Style (45 sec work, 25 sec rest) 6 stations

    Exercises included:
    Burpees
    Freak Nasties
    Chest press with block
    Bobby Hurley
    Big Boi Sit Ups
    J Lo’s

    Rinse and repeat

    COP #2 6MOM
    20 X Hello Dolly (Hey zoo)
    20 X LBC
    20 X Crunchy Frog

    COT: Count, Name (a lot of FNG’s), Jose Prayed us out

    We met at the Covington Tap Room for post work out beverages.

    All in all I think the first mixer was a success. looking forward to doing another one in the next month or so.

  • We’ve Had Enough of Your Shenanigans, Shooter! – from Bushwacker

    Everything is relative. This morning’s 40° Felt like 35° to YHC, and 55° to Shooter. He was already off to a bad start.

    WARM UP (to 50°)

    IC x10: High Knees, Butt Kicks, Toe Touches, Imperial Walkers, Windmills, Torso Twists

    THANG

    The pack of 6 PAX ran the regular route together at slightly slower than a 9 minute pace. Great mumblechatter complete with contemplations and chuckles.

    MARY

    After another appropriately extended absence, the Dice of Doom emerged from the presumably dank and dark dungeon where they reside when not inflicting groaning terror, generally at the hands of Shooter. And so it went that after Pelican started us off with a roll of 20 Merkins, it was Shooter’s turn. Shooter, Dice of Doom, Scramble – only one possibility, 50 Burpees! Instantly tired of Shooter’s shenanigans, instead of passing the dice to Waterpik, we wrapped up with 100 100s and 50 LBCs.

    COT

    Pelican prayed us out. Thanks gents, Shooter, you’re out!

    #Shooter #The Pelican #Waterpik #Akbar #Zoolander

  • Boom-Shaka-Laka! And Then There Was Chainsaw! – from The Hammer

    As YHC has/am learning, a large part of being a parent is nothing more than a glorified chauffeur/ATM. If you are Pickaxe’s dad, you can add scribe into the mix. An excuse to get in my cave and crack some AC/DC while I write. So all good!

    Pickaxe has been itching to Q again since his initial Q the day after Christmas. With a dearth of Northshore PAX donating their talent to the Lakefront beatdown, no better time than the present. So off we go…

    Warm-o-Rama

    Windmills
    Waybacks (Toe Touches w/ extra stretch at end)
    IW
    SSH

    This 9 year old drill sergeant made us bear crawl towards Noah’s Ark. Along the way, he planted several Easter Eggs with exercises or candy in them. As we approached them, he had members of the PAX open and read them. On our journey to the Ark, we did:

    Jump Squats x 15
    8 count Bodybuilders x 10
    Luigis x 10 (This is a PIckaxe original spawned from a Mario video game wherein a short, fat Italian plumber falls down, does some movement only possible through coding, and arrives in an erect posture. In practice, it must be modified from its video precision, and basically looks like a burpee where you turn over on your back before you jump up.)

    For the second half of our journey to Noah’s, we karaoked. Once at the Ark, our leader had us partner up for the following:

    Burpees x 120
    Freak Nasties x 240
    Crunchy Frogs x 360 (We missed you, Cowbell!)

    Cumulative, done by one while the other partner ran around the Ark.
    As an aside, the human body is not designed to do 360 Crunchy Frogs. Just an aside.

    On the mosey back, Pickaxe saved the most brutal Easter Egg for last. Another Pickaxe original that he made up one night as his father begged him not to! Boom-Shaka-Lakas! What is that you ask? It is a “different” kind of cadence exercise. While Pickaxe said “Boom-Shaka-Laka, Shaka-Laka, Shaka-Laka, Shaka-Laka, Boom…”

    Now, we started doing Merkins, then when he said Boom, we turned over into a crab-walk like position to do what can only be described as elevated Wife Pleasers (Hip Thrusters according to Pickaxe ;). Nonstop. 20 of them. There was almost Mutiny on the Bounty. Had our Q been old enough to see a PG-13 movie, there almost certainly would have been! However, his leadership and willingess to push all us old dudes is actually inspiring (if YHC does say so himself.)

    Back at the flag, we did some Mary, ran to the Gazebo and back, Name-o-Rama, COT. We had one FNG, Pickaxe’s younger brother, who happened to turn 7 on this day. He wanted to come out to F3 to support Pickaxe. His older brother gave him a ridiculously awesome name that he made his dad call him the rest of the day.

    As Pickaxe shared, his brother once cut his foot on a chainsaw…so welcome, Chainsaw! It was a special day for both Pickaxe and Chainsaw. Shooter bequeathed the Freedom Hammer to Pickaxe’s care for the time being, and the PAX sang Chainsaw Happy Birthday. Be it known that later that day, Chainsaw and his friends “played F3”, with Chainsaw as Q.

    Thank you to all for allowing yourselves to be led by a 9 year old, and for making a 7 year old’s birthday so special. Their dad just might be proud of them.

  • Which way did he go? – from Shooter

    7 PAX posted on this spring feeling gloom to get in some more mileage as we close in on the RunCajunRun. At least 2 of the Qs teammates from team “Crawldaddies” have posted each Thursday for the month of February and have even had days where 4 and 5 posted.. Unfortunately though team “Unitards” have represented respectively in just about every AO for the month and the most important of them the 10k AU lait on Sunday mornings logging some freakish mileage. YHC decided today we would take another path, so after a brief warmup of 10IC SSH, Mummy kicks, Butt kicks, GM and Toe Touches the PAX ran through the park into Lakewood heights subdivision to the red light crossing on Florida into Greenleaves for a route that Pelican has been spotted on a couple times this month. Instructions were simple, journey out 20 mins and return.. The path along the way proved to have some obstacles such as leaning sidewalks (Ragnar preparation Akbar) and blinding lights that threw sir Wacker into an arms waving panic that caused a morning commuter to pause as if there was trouble ahead. The seen reminded YHC of recent memories at the Crazy Ivan where plenty PAX illuminated the path with headlamps blinding some along the way, but providing illumination for others. I guess the lights on this Gloom affected more PAX than originally thought as we had some detours taken on our return to the flag with Cowbell and Waterpik turning early and Bushwacker leading Akbar a stray in attempting the same detour.. All PAX eventually returned safely for our count and Cowbell graciously prayed out the PAX. If your M is on the fence of what it is we enjoy so much and so early in the Gloom get her out tonight at the Gipper for a 30 min beatdown at 6 with F3 and FIA hosted by Cowbell followed by some F2 at the taproom..

    Appreciate you men following my lead and until the next Gloom 👍🏼👊🏼✌🏼!!

    #akbar,#bushwacker, #cowbell, #pelican, #waterpik, #zoolander

  • Relay Thursday – from Shooter

    Arriving early at the Scramble with no one in sight, YHC wondered what the mild less humid gloom would bring in terms of attendance.. I admittedly had taken the wrong pill a few times this week but the accountability of leading a beatdown would not win on this day.. After a few minutes Zoolander rolls in then Pelican and Waterpik emerge from the darkness. With Cowbell turning the corner at 0513 Q then knew his planned beatdown would hopefully be welcomed by at least 1 PAX. As the warmup began phat Johnson joined in taking a lesson from Waterpik running to the AO..
    Warmup 10IC Grass grabbers, Scorpion kicks, wife pleasers, windmills, mummy kicks, Butt kicks and self love… Journeyed our normal course corralling at Messina and Monroe. Partnered up for relay sprints P1 50-75% roughly a hundred yards then returning at 100% while P2 held plank. F/F 5 rounds then journeyed back through the Hermitage at back to the shovel flag. ISI was on tap with 7 mins remaining. 50 squats, 50 wife pleasers, 50 leg lunges, 50 calf raises, 10 pistol squats and 10 Modified Bulgarians using our beautiful pine trees by the park..

    PAX wrapped up with announcements, intentions for Cowbells friend and Q closed the COT..

    Appreciate you men posting and till the next Gloom 👍🏼👊🏼✌🏼!!!

  • Intensify to Modify: Pickaxe’s First Q

    It was a frigid morning along the lakefront the 2nd day of Christmas. While 9 year old Pickaxe, in his, ahem, first Q of his young F3 career, did not give a Tujague’s recipe for the crawfish caught in Arabi (Uptown Chalmette if you’re from Da Parish), he did come bearing gifts, 12 in fact. However, these were ones we COULD wait to open, as each contained 2 various and sundry exercises for the PAX, one on the foray out, one on the way back.

    Prethang:

    Pickaxe and his dad, The Hammer, forsook the traditional 2 mile pre-thang in order to lay the 12 gifts with great care along the 1/2 mile path to the beach. The 12 packages came in different colors: red, silver, and gold. This would be important, as Pickaxe instructed the color of each package determined the number of repetitions for the exercised contained therein, as well as the mode of transportation to the next box. The directive was as follows:

    Gold: 10 reps/each exercise, Karaoke to next box

    Red: 20 reps/each exercise, sprint to next box

    Silver: 30 reps/each exercise, bear crawl to next box.

    Full Disclosure: When assisting Pickaxe with laying out the gifts, The Hammer was only thinking of the challenges on the way out. As such, the way out brought a long (read: 200 yard) sprint followed by a short bear crawl. On the way back, however, that meant a 200 yard bear crawl. As Pickaxe would say, “Intensify to Modify”.

    Each member of the PAX would take turns opening the gifts, then calling out the exercise they “unwrapped”, there being 24 in total, covering upper body, lower body, and core. A particularly tough gauntlet was a series of 30 8 count bodybuilders, with a bear crawl leading to 20 burpees, followed by a long sprint. Pickaxe insisted the exercises were blindly placed in each box so that he knew not the order, nor the quantity. This series caused some to question the 9 year old. Intensify to modify.

    When the PAX returned to the flag, we circled up for Mary, finishing up with Hello Dollies, Freddy Mercuries, 100s, and a Mission Impossible plank (SIDENOTE: The series/movies should be named Mission Improbable, not Impossible. Think about it. If true, it would’ve been a single episode series, and the ending would not have been a happy one.)

    COT, then Russo prayed us out. Pickaxe is grateful to have had the opportunity to lead, and his dad is grateful to befriend a group of men that would give him the opportunity to do so. Merry Christmas, God Bless, and SYITG!

  • It really did happen.

    You guys will do whatever it takes to keep a guy on the straight and narrow.  Looking back at my one and only backblast (VQ on 11/14), it was late just like this one.  A little headlocking and friendly ribbing may just be the encouragement some of us need. I know I do.  So without further ado, see below for Bird’s yoga inspired Q – it actually did happen Wacker! 

    0510 – Q posts with computer, yoga mats, speaker and phone in tow in preparation for said event.  Borrowed yoga mats courtesy of Bayou Yoga studio, which if I’m not doing some craziness with you guys ITG is where I might be otherwise on an early morning.  Oh who am I kidding, if I don’t show I’m probably still in bed at 5:15!  Actually, I do enjoy the yoga, although I’m not sure if my illicit affair is with the yoga studio or F3 – depends on who you ask I guess. 

    Shortly after distributing yoga mats and various props arrive the following members of PAX: Shooter, The Pelican, Steve, and Zoolander. 

    0515 – Chilly morning, albeit not as bad as the forecasted high 30 temps.  The combination of cold temps, yoga, and those of you who aren’t so flexible could have been a recipe for disaster!  Cold temps abated with a quick warm up consisting of high knees, butt kicks, side straddle hops, seal jacks, torso twists, windmills, mountain climbers, and merkins (10 each IC). 

    0520 – Just to ensure all the sensitive areas were good and warm, PAX took a quick run to the tunnel – gotta remember a headlamp next time for the spooky, dark forest in the turn northward.  Eventually, the light of the tunnel approaches and PAX regroups with a plank a ten count merkins in cadence before the return run. 

    0530 – PAX regroups on stage where yoga mats are spread.  Shooter was the only one who got the memo about bringing a mat, but it was some sort of blanket from south of the border – not your typical yoga attire.  Speaking of which, thankfully there were no yoga pants to be seen either.

    After circling up for the upcoming spiritual experience, Q reminds PAX that yoga should be done with intention, gratitude, and purpose.  One of the nice thing about the practice is that it allows the space for thinking about those things.  Did I mention I’m grateful for the PAX?  I am. 

    First yoga series consisted of:

    • Child’s pose
    • Table, right-arm up, twist under, breath
    • Table, left arm up, twist under, breath
    • Bird dog, right arm out, left leg up, knee to elbow five times
    • Bird dog, left arm out, right leg up, knee to elbow five times
    • Table to bear pose to down dog
    • 10 Down dog pushups (aka Carolina Dry Docks)
    • Repeat 1x

    Second yoga series consisted of:

    • Two rounds of sun salutation A (i.e., forward fold, halfway left, plank to chataranga, up dog, down dog, jump or step to hands)

    Third yoga series consisted of:

    • Sun Salutation A
    • Right leg up to runners lunge
    • Rise to crescent
    • Twisting crescent
    • Hands to hear center and bend forward to hook elbows on knee (twisting lunge)
    • Open arms
    • Twisting crescent
    • Crescent
    • Repeat 1x

    Fourth yoga series consisted of:

    • Sun Salutation A
    • Right leg up to runners lunge
    • Warrior 1
    • Warrior 2
    • Reverse warrior
    • Right angle pose (bind encouraged)
    • There was a bunch of stuff I had planned after that that I forgot that will save for next time
    • Warrior 2
    • Warrior 1
    • Repeat 1X

    Fifth yoga series consisted of:

    Honestly gents, it’s been so long since the Q (it actually did happen Wacker) that I’ve gotten a little fuzzy on what happened next, but there was some yogi squat action, lizard lunging, and flying into configurations inspired by birds of sorted varieties.  Zoolander covered a few of them.  I can’t even remember if we did a little meditating at the end or did a shavasana, but I do recall some focused breathing – cool are in through the nostrils, arm air out through the nostrils – and the obligatory namaste.  For those of you who’ve gotten this far, a little Wikipedia explaining a shavasana – if we didn’t do it last time, we will the next time. 

    Shavasana (Sanskrit: शवासन; IAST: śavāsana), Corpse Pose, or Mrtasana,[1] is an asana in hatha yoga and modern yoga as exercise, often used for relaxation at the end of a session. It is the usual pose for the practice of yoga nidra meditation.  Shavasana is intended to rejuvenate the body, mind, and spirit. In the pose, the breath deepens, and the stress of the day is released. The yogi forgets all other thoughts and surrenders any psychological effort. While in Savasana, yogis slip into blissful neutrality and reflect on the practice.[7] Comfort is essential in the pose; the slightest point of discomfort can be endlessly distracting. Shavasana is a good way to reduce stress and tension.[8]

    Namaste ended the practice and brought the PAX back from oblivion into the present moment.  Following a few quick announcements (last week was a busy one!), Steve led us in prayer. 

    A quick afterthought…yoga isn’t something you do as a one off.  Like anything, to get good at it and realize the benefits, one has to practice.  PAX performed admirably considering yoga isn’t in the regular lineup of F3 beatdowns.  Looking forward to rotating this in on occasion and adding flexibility to the list of qualities that describe such a fine group of men. 

    Glad to be with you all,

    Bird

  • Audible at the Scramble

    YHC decided to change up the routine slightly at the Scramble in the Gloom. Each Pax had to complete 50 merkins, burpees, and squats during the course of the 5K. It was good to see Mathlete make a surprise appearance, even though he said he wont be coming back when he learned the Scramble was our running AO.

    It was good to share the streets of Old Mandeville with you, men! As always, it was my privilege to lead you guys this morning. Y’all push me to become a better man every time I am with you.

    Thanks to Steve for praying us out.

  • Excuse Me While I Kiss the Ground

    So there we were…how every great story starts…today was the commencement of what will hopefully become an annual CSAUP, Uncle Hammer’s 1000 Burpee Beatdown.

    First: Special Shoutouts —

    Jose 10k –DJ Jose had the best possible music, with songs individualized for members of the PAX

    Moby Dick –Dude’s 71, that’s right, 71, and he is out there making us middle agers look bad.

    Hawgcycle — Did this CSAUP on the Southshore by himself in just over 2 hours…no idea how he accomplished that. Awesome work!

    Now onto the beatdown:

    0610: Knowing this would likely be an all day affair, we skipped the normal 2 mile pre-thang, instead moseying from the flags towards the beach, stopping at each fire hydrant for a set of 10 burpees (6 sets out, 6 sets back =120). DJ 10k had Brother Angus lead us off, picking the axe (See what I did there) like lightning, but sounding like thunder. Then, while most of us may be partial to Southern Belles, Mr. David Lee Roth, with help from Steve Vai, pined for a young lass named Yankee Rose. As if the blood wasn’t pumping hard enough by 0615, Vince Neil kickstarted our hearts even further. Before we knew it, we were 1/8 the way to our goal. We returned with the remaining PAX awaiting to begin.

    0630– No warmup necessary. Jump right into the EMOM of 6 burpees. Doing this mitigates the overwhelming thought of 1000, as well as helping with the physically challenging nature of the CSAUP. As the Zen philosopher Basho once said, or maybe it was Bushwhacker, “A journey of 1000 miles begins with a single burpee.” How true.

    Mentally, the wash rinse and repeat of doing this for an hour can be quite taxing. This is where DJ Jose was so great. Always thinking of other, he picked out songs for most of the PAX. Some included were:

    The Bird (Morris Day and the Time) –Bird

    U Can’t Touch This (MC Hammer) –Hammer

    Some Moby Song —Moby Dick

    Relax (Frankie Goes to Hollywood) –Zoolander

    The Best Around (From Karate Kid) –Russo

    To be honest, the hour was over before we knew it. Most PAX were asking to continue for another hour, and Hammer could easily have been elected mayor of CSAUPtown but for all the mail in ballots. However, they all missed their wives so much, they could not bear to continue for another minute. That was the right choice, guys, as hard as it was to make.

    So, by 0730: 120+365 (5 minutes were sets of 7)+ 15 (a burpee for each PAX during COT) = 500

    Halfway home by coffeeteria!

    PHASE 2: Do 250 OYO throughout the day before reconvening at 6 pm at Grandmother’s House. Some went more traditional –Hammer did 25 sets of 10 throughout the day (looked weird doing it outside the Pelican Park gym before 2.0’s basketball game). DJ 10k did his while his M worked out. Of course, he overachieved, doing another 350 before lunch. Russo knocked the rest of his out before I got home, it seemed. Hawg’s Breath did a few with his adorable daughter on his back, like the true bad ass he is. However we decided to get it done, we finished 750 before twilight.

    PHASE 3: Final 250 at Grandma’s

    6 skrong at Grandma’s at 1800. Turbo, Bird, Jose, Hammer, Hawg’s Breath, Akbar. Knocked out the last quarter in just over 30 minutes. Having an eclectic mix to inspire us: CCR, NIN, and Billy Idol (twice, in fact. No really.)

    …And done! We then enjoyed some F2 at Old Rail, then home to bed.

    Thank you all for joining in this venture. Each of you inspired me along the way, and I am indebted to you all for the kindness, generosity, friendship, and leadership you all display.

    For those that “missed” it, there will always be next year!

  • Nothing Good Ever Happens at the Tunnel

    At least that’s what Zoolander says. Or, perhaps it was first said by Jose 10k. Who knows? But, after a brief warmup consisting of SSHs, GMs, HKs, BKs, ACs, and Self Love, YHC led the Pax on a Mosey to the tunnel for:

    THE THANG

    Partner up. P1 jogs through the tunnel and back, sprinting up the inclines on the both sides. P2 does 10 merkins, 10 smurf jacks, and 10 rower situps. Switch. Set the timer for 10 minutes and off we go.

    SLOW Mosey back to bus stop for 2 sets of 10: Derkins, box jumps.

    Mosey back to flag for bunny hops (2 columns), bear crawls (2 more columns), and back pedals (the rest of the covered area), then jog back, R and R (5 minutes).

    Mary: Cowbell’s crunchy frogs, flutter kicks, hello dollies, Freddy merc’s.

    COT and YHC prayed us out.

    It’s always an honor, men, to be a part of such an inspirational group. And, I am definitely a better man because of your positive vibes over the past 3 years. The positive habits that F3 engenders are definitely life changing.