F3 New Orleans

Tag: Zoolander

  • Back peddlin’ – from Russo

    Pax of 4 ventured to Granny’s in Goldilocks weather (not too hot, not too cold) to see how much sweat YHC could drum up.

    Early mumble revolve around basketball, podcasts, 80s rock, and how Soundgarden has been around for almost 30 years now.

    Warm-up (all IC)
    SSH (20)
    Cherry pickers (15)
    Self love (15)
    Toe touches (15)
    Torso twists (15)
    High knees (20)

    Pre-thang 1 (3 rounds, OYO)
    Freak Nastys and Step ups (2 is 1)
    15x, 10x, 5x

    Pre-thang 2

    Bear crawl slaloms through the columns at Granny’s, 5 calf raises for each step up the pilot house, bear crawl around said pilot house, 5 calf raises for each step down, back pedal slalom (it’s a thing) back to start.

    Mosey to the tunnel of love for Thang:
    4 merkins, mosey down the tunnel, 3 merkins, back pedal up the tunnel, 4 merkins. Rinse and repeat four times.

    Mosey back to start for a quick round of Mary: a few more freak nastys, durkins, crunchy frogs IC (requisite since Cowbell posted), 6 inch drill IC (requisite with YHC), hands to heels IC, leg raises IC.

    COT, name o rama, and prayer to close.

    Reminder about both the Northshore convergence this Saturday and F3/FIA get together later in the month (4/29 @ 6:30 PM)

    Thank you to the Pax for pushing me, there were some superstars out there. Until we do it all again, SYITG!

  • INFERNO – 9 CIRCLES OF HELL – from Zoolander

    The Northshore beatdown on Holy Saturday was themed around Dante’s Inferno. A group of 18 Pax, including a guest appearance from the Southshore’s SOGO, descended upon the Lakefront for 9 Circles of Hell. Warmup exercises were completed in reverse cadence (4-3-2-1) to align with the date (4/3/21) and to remind everyone it was Cowbell’s birthday. We traveled 9 blocks, circling up at each one to perform the 66 exercises illustrated below. Lots of Mumble Chatter, especially at Circle no. 2. We finished at the shovel flag with some Absolution, completing 666 total reps (or there about) for the day.

    Announcements:
    – Northshore 5 year Convergence to be led by Waterpik on Saturday 4/10.
    – Fia/F3 mixer at the Gipper on 4/29 at 6:30pm.

    Cowbell prayed us out. Happy Easter to all.

  • Watch your step? – from Shooter

    Ailing all week with the potential diagnosis of a broken foot YHC got the news Thursday he needed too go ahead and shed the boot 🥾 he had worn the previous 3 days.. Only problem now is the arrival and center stage monkey humper position of “Turbo Dawg” to lay out a Hershey squirt right in the center of the PAX. Which for whatever reason would find the PAX once again circling up around the damaged section of concrete for count and call and the addition of him emptying his bladder as if his territory was not marked up enough. “Watch your step!” Zoolander. YHC must have known the gloom would have presented these moments as Jose 10k arrived mentioning the fact of how his week started with a deranged axe 🪓 yielding fellow swinging it above head as the school week began. Be sure to ask him the next time you see him. As for the rest of us on top the parking garage we couldn’t resist the mention of #Floridaman by Russo to start reminiscing of the days of W&J broadcasting on B97 as Hammer recalls. The enormous “B” inflatable could be seen around town at car dealerships and on site broadcast events all around the Metro NOLA area and if there are still any 10% out there check them out on the 99.5 weekday mornings..

    Alright enough mumbling we can save for F2 at the Waffle House where the rest of the #floridamen meet before getting there assignments.. No judgement here just something I heard mentioned worthy of noting….

    Warmup
    All IC 10 Arm circles F/J, Cherry pickers, Toe touches, SSH, Windmills and Torso twists.

    Thang
    YHC parked his certainly Manly and always roomy Honda FIT a floor below with coupons for the beatdown. Stations were set with the dice of doom, jump rope, Ruck plate, the Black mystery bag, a wagon and a selection of light and heavy cylinder blocks..
    2 men alternate turns wheeling there fellow brethren up the ramp in the wagon completing a burpee at the top and returning for their pull back up. Rest of the PAX alternate through the station’s completing one arm plate swings, rolling your own destiny with the dice of doom, jumping rope, curls for the girls, squat thrusters, Tri-extensions and bag carries up and down the stairs.. Every man made it through each station and we finished with 3 mins to return the coupons to the FIT.

    We assembled back up top for countarama, namarama and COT with Russo closing us out in prayer.. Not quite sure why the PAX assembled back where we did, however I appreciate that we did because it certainly assisted with the naming of this backblast.

    Thanks for following my lead and until the next Gloom 👍🏼👊🏼✌🏼!!!

  • Winters last gasp – from Waterpik

    Cool temperatures greeted the PAX this morning out at mandeville city hall. We took the regular route today, then hit the Play ground equipment for some exercises such as Merkins slow squats Peter Parker‘s 100s crunchy frogs.
    T-claps to shooter for showing up And riding the bike with us despite having a bum ankle

  • Marsh Madness 2021 – from Zoolander

    Welcome to Marsh Madness 2021. Twenty-four Pax converged upon the Milestone Marsh for this second-time event1

    In the presence of the Pick Axe-entrusted Freedom Hammer, we started with a quick disclaimer, Warmorama, Bushwacker-style2 instructions, and then the THANG.

    The Pax counted off in 4’s and formed 4 x 6ish-man teams at each corner of the court with a basketball. While 1 member of each team backpedaled with their ball to half court, performed a Bobby Hurley, and drove to goal for a shot of his choosing:

    – Layup (1 point),
    – Free Throw (2 points), or
    – Three point shot (3 points)
    Zero points for missed shots

    the rest of each team completed the following series of exercises in cadence led by a rotating corner Q.
    • Burpees
    • Air Presses
    • Shoulder Tap Merkins
    • Copperhead Jump Squats
    • LBCs
    • Plank Jacks
    • Monkey Humpers
    • Flutter Kicks
    Each man – including FNGs, 2nd timers, and celebrity guests – had multiple chances to lead the cadence.

    Shooters marked their points with sidewalk chalk and fell in line to call the cadence for the next exercise. It took a few rounds before each team found its own rhythm, but after that it was like watching a philharmonic orchestra playing Mary had a little lamb.
    After “40 minutes of hell,” team member points were tallied, and the highest scoring individual from each of the 4 teams were down-bracketed to a 5-shot “Around-the-World” shoot out on their respective side of the court. The rest of the Pax performed Goofballs and Side Straddle Hops to distract the Final Four shooters.
    Grundy, with accountant like focus, out-calculated Speedy;
    Ocho outdanced Whip.

    Grundy and Ocho were then down-bracketed to compete in a best-of-10 shootout from the free throw line. As luck would have it, they tied, and we went to Sudden Death from the Three Point line. Despite Ocho’s shenanigans, Grundy stomped the Stomper and emerged as the 2021 Marsh Madness champion!

    – Trophy
    – Count-orama
    – Name-orama – Welcome FNGs Sonar (EH’d by Turbo Tax) and Gomer Pyle (EH’d by Sparky).
    – Announcements
    o Northshore 5-year convergence led by Waterpik at the Lakefront on April 10.
    o Next F3/FiA mixer is 4/29. Thank you Jose10k, some of us do have to plan ahead for weeknight workouts.
    o ZOORICH CLASSIC at the Lakefront on April 24. (See how I slipped that in there Cowbell?…never too early!)

    QIC prayed us out and group photo followed. Great job by all. We’ll see if Grundy can defend his title in 2022. Thanks for playing along men. See you in the next Gloom.

    Footnotes:
    1Seriously, footnotes in a Backblast? Why not? The first Marsh Madness was in 2019 with a small, dare I say Elite, group of 8. Bird was an FNG and drained 16 x 3-point shots. The B-ball gods did not favor him today though. And well, Corona (as it was called back then) had other plans in ‘20.

    2Bushwacker-style instructions typically include circumlocutory, sesquipedalian musings about man’s ultimate life purpose with some semblance of what the Pax should be doing for the next 40-50 minutes. They are often accompanied by Mumble Chatter and confusion by all within earshot. Bushwacker-style instructions are the exact opposite of Turbo-style instructions, which are direct, concise, and never to be interrupted without penalty.

  • Stretch it Out at Home – from Bird

    Seven strong posted for Scramble at 0515. A little cooler temps than expected this am as a result of the storm that rolled through Mandeville yestereve. Personally still adjusting to the time change and shaking the cobwebs off at the early hour is still a work in progress. Q arrived 0505 to find Ackbar stretching it out and getting loose. The rest of the PAX posting for the morning included: Shooter, Bushwacker, Zoolander, Waterpick (ran from his house wearing some crazy red, white, and blue getup) and Cowbell (rolling in hot as per usual).

    Q counted down watching the clock to get moving right at 0515 beginning with 10 counts, in cadence, of side straddle hops, toe touches, windmills, and torso twists. A ten count forward fold was sprinkled in to try and further loosen the hamstrings; however I recently read that there isn’t supposed to be any stretching in F3 – you’re supposed to do that at home! I guess that’s a bit like no crying in baseball? Keep stretching it out at home fellas, don’t wanna get too tight!

    The brief warm up with F3 exercises was followed by a “dynamic warmup” with a lunge walk with twist, t-walk, and ninja squats. PAX was commenting at YHC’s flexibility during the ninja squats, but little did they know that a muscle pulled during the process was concealed so as not to show any weakness prior to the beatdown.
    Typical route to sunset point was mixed up with 4x4s (burpee to plank, 4 merkins, and 4 mountain climbers). After starting with 3, PAX added 3 more each time passing the intersection at Monroe and Massena, finishing with 12 4X4s on the return trip. PAX mostly stayed together during the run, but regrouped after each round of 4x4s to begin again.

    Along the run, YHC and Bushwacker exchanged grateful observations of the night sky, clear and bright after the previous night’s washout. During the 4x4s, it was obvious that the after-effects of Shooter’s Building Blocks at the Gipper on Wednesday were taking their toll. As I’m writing this post-Saturday beatdown, YHC is amazed at the Ackbar’s dedication to the merkin. I had to pull out excel to calculate the Scramble merkins (120 if you didn’t already count), but that pales in comparison to the 500 PAX executed this am.

    PAX arrived back at City Hall with only a few minutes remaining and alas there wasn’t time for the Bruce Lee that Q had planned. Those arriving first dropped into a plank hold while waiting on the six. The rest of the PAX dropped into plank and alternated chill cut and high plank until 0600. COT, YHC prayed us out, and announcements. If you haven’t heard, next Saturday’s beatdown in at the Marsh!

  • We’re Caught in a Trap, and Can’t Walk Out… – from Akbar

    Because I love y’all too much baby.

    And so it began, the 2nd annual Merkin Trap on the lakefront. Last year around this time we did 400 Merkins, could it be topped? I think so.

    18 PAX converged at the Lakefront today (without Gnats!) to make ourselves better. It could have been an even 20 if TankedUp didn’t steel Bush and Steve for a OYO Marathon.

    Gloom Factor – overcast, chilly 47 degrees

    Warm up – Nada. It’s time to get to business

    THANG – multiple exercises, mosey’s, and a lot of Merkins with a surprise thrown in mid-way. Exercises were done IC, 12,8,5 (50 reps) and some OYO.

    Starting out at the shovel flag: SSH | Merkins IC 12,8,5

    Mosey to Rips for Calf Raises on the stairs | Dirkins on the curb. 12,8,5 IC

    Mosey to the wall: Step Ups OYO in sets of 12/8/5 | Irkins OYO 24, 16, 10

    Run 2 blocks to Jefferson, stop for 10 Merkins at Claiborne. Monkey Humpers |Stone Mountain 12/8/5 IC

    Run 2 blocks to Monroe stop at Madison for 10 Merkins. Squats | Leg-up Merkins 12,8,5 IC

    Run to the Marsh, stop at Livingston for 10 Merkins

    Milestone Marsh: 50 pull ups, 50 Freak Nasties OYO – modification was supine or negative pullups

    Cowbell gave me a time check before we hit the Marsh, and after 100 reps YHC had to modify to make it back in time.

    Run back to the flag, stopping at each street for 15 Merkins.

    On the way, some father son intensification took place with Hammer and Pickaxe. Hammer carried Pickaxe most of the way piggyback style, and I took a turn for 1 leg. While Hammer and I did Merkins, Pickaxe did a Luigi (I think) – or pretty much a Merkin with no arms. At least he didn’t have to carry Shooter for 6 blocks.

    Back to the shovel flag for the wrap up.

    · Crunchy Frogs for Cowbell | Merkins 12,8,5 IC
    · LBC’s IC 12,8,5 24 Irkins OYO 8,5 FIA Merkins IC
    · Hello Dolly | Merkins IC 12,8

    500 Merkins in an hour, Advil post beatdown OYO

    Count, Name – Welcome FNG Binky!

    Announcements:

    1. F2 with FIA Thursday March 25th, 6pm at the Lakefront Gazebo and Barley Oak afterwards. Bring your wife, girlfriend, your female children, and their friends. Who wouldn’t want to attend that!

    2. Zoolander Q next week at the Milestone Marsh – NOT THE LAKEFRONT

    Thanks for following my lead,

    Till Next Gloom – Akbar

    Moleskin

    I first did this workout in Atlanta and loved the cadence. Last year we did it with 400 Merkins and hit 500 this year. 600 in 2022?

    Great to see Blaze back at the Mothership again.

    Zoolander had a 3 man EH. T claps for What’s That making the trip all the way from Kenner.

    T Claps to Pickaxe who hung in there, that’s a long way to run for a young man.

    Great to see Steve again at coffee and glad he’s back in the workforce.

    TankedUp is either crazy, a beast, or both. He just decided to run a marathon in Covington on his own. Maybe because Hammer called him Geriatric. T Claps brother.

  • Gnats 1 PAX 1 – from TurboTax

    It was a draw. The Gnats mobilized early and mounted a fierce attack, but the PAX persevered and evened the score with a strong showing. It all started with a burpee heavy warmup which, in all honesty, wasn’t much of a warmup at all. It was The Thang from the bell. Burpees were performed with a sprinkling of standard warmup exercises added to the mix and then it was on to the main event…PAX vs sandbag. Dividing up into teams of two and three, we moved back and forth in 10 yard increments carrying our sandbags in various fashions while bear crawling, running, burpee long jumping, etc in between rounds. We then dropped the sand bags and ran a few sprint relays wrapping things up with some Mary after returning to the Shovel Flag. Countorama nameorama and Russo prayed us out. Thanks for letting me lead guys and making us all look good for the little old lady videographer. Hammer, did you remember to give her Bushwacker’s contact info?

  • Same ole, same ole – from Waterpik

    It was the same ole, same ole this morning at the mandeville city hall scramble. But that’s the beauty of F3, it’s the consistency. Yes, some of the regulars were out, and yes, there have been some AOs where numbers are low, but it’s still good to get out there in the gloom and hit the streets of Old mandeville for our weekly 5K. Here’s to a strong close to the week, men!

  • And there were two… – from Hogs Breath

    So first as YHC headed toward grandmothers house, the entrance to the trailhead on Girod st. was being repaired….not to be deterred I skirted the block to enter on Lafitte st.
    When as I pull up, only Zoolander and myself were present. The mumble chatter went something akin

    “Do you have the q?”
    “No, do you?”

    Well in the absence of a Q, what would we do?
    Make our own of course! We decided to wait a few minutes with a warm-up to see if any others should show…

    Imperial walkers x 15
    Touch touches x10
    Hairy rockettes x 15
    And maybe some side straddle hops

    When we determined that no one else would show, we headed for a mosey to the lakefront and North on lakeshore to the pier wall and back. On the way we had some good mumble chatter of life, nicknames and reasons both of these make us sore…

    Returning to grandmas house with about 10 mins we did some Mary. Zoolander preformed a Mary exercise (Big boy sit-ups, crunchy frogs, flutter kicks, LBC, Obliques) while YHC would run to the top of the tower and preform a Burpee at the top, the run down and switch. We rounded the Mary out with a 40sec plank.

    Where two gather there will be pain!