F3 New Orleans

Tag: Wilford Montana

  • False Alarm! – from America’s Best

    Boxing Day is known for many things. Well, a few things at least. Ok, really nobody knows much about what Boxing Day is, but if you Google it, you will find that the Boxing Day leftover sandwich is a thing.

    Which is perfect, because I happened to have not finished the “sandwich” week of IPC, so we would perform that as a leftover today. . .

    The Undercard:
    Bear crawl 30 yards, triple-broad jump back, with 3 burpees after each 3 jumps. Accompanying music: a leftover earworm from Paradox’s Buttcracker last week. Since it was a ballet theme, I was sure Dox would throw in the (Yacht Rock?) classic “True” by Spandau Ballet. Since he didn’t, it has been playing on repeat in my brain for a week. The only way to cleanse: do some work while the entire song plays out. Sometimes you have to poison the host to kill the parasite.

    Then we moseyed with our coupons ¼ around the CC for…

    The Main Event:

    Based on a prior template, the PAX would do an exercise while one man took a lap contemplating a question. Today, they would be mostly True or False Questions.
    Correct answer results in reward, incorrect results in punishment. With each question, the PAX had one extra chance at redemption by identifying title and artist of the song playing.

    First up: Tana. T or F: According to the Bible, 3 wise men visited Jesus’ nativity.
    We did curls while “Fairytale of New York” played. Tana returned, unaware he had even been asked a question. Nonetheless, he responded “True.” The answer, in fact, is False, and we did 5 burpees. Goose was able to identify the Pogues (2nd guess), and although I didn’t hear him name the song, he did inform the PAX that the NYPD does not actually have a choir, which is an infinitely superior piece of information.

    And for that, Goose got to go next. T or F: The modern image of Santa Claus (as we know him) was created by Coca-Cola. Now, YHC tried to pretend the question was randomly selected, but of course, it was designed for Goose since I’ve heard him state this as fact at least twice in the last week.
    White Winter Hymnal by Fleet Foxes played while Goose contemplated and ran, and the rest did Mike Tyson merkins (it’s Boxing Day, remember?)
    Goose returned, and less-confidently than expected, answered “True.” In fact, again the answer is false, as there exist multiple examples of Santa as we know him prior to the Coca Cola ads of the 30s and 40s.
    5 burpees.

    Maneater was next, and his T or F question was: The use of an “Xmas” as a placeholder for “Christmas” began as part of the conspiracy to excise Christ from His holiday.
    We continued the Boxing Day theme and listened to a cover of “Christmas Treat” by Julian Casablancas. (the original was written by Jimmy Fallon and Horatio Sans for an SNL sketch).
    I was sure to sort of mumble the original question to make sure Maneater answered “True” (which he did). Of course, again the answer was false, as the X (Greek Chi) has been used to nenote Christ since around 1500. 5 burpees
    YHC had already selected the PAX question for this round: “Julian Casablancas is the lead singer of what band?” Honeysuckle, mid-song, perhaps using mind-reading technology, before I had a chance to even ask the question, asked “Is this the Strokes?”
    The PAX was rewarded with 10 merkins.

    And Honeysuckle got to be the next man up. Recognizing that HS likely was on to my pattern, I had to switch gears and not offer him a T or F question. Instead, it was Dad joke time: What did Goose say when Pope gave him a comb for Christmas?
    Honeysuckle ran while the PAX alternated 7 Goosies with 7 Merkins and listened to “One Glove,” a duet by Jimmy Fallon and Will Ferrell. Although HS was unable to come up with the answer (Thanks, I’ll never part with it), Goose and Tana worked out both the title and artist of the song. I think we did 10 merkins as reward.

    Next Wet Tap was given:
    T or F: The lyric “Hark the Herald Angels Sing” originally was at the end (and not the beginning) of the song.
    Worded like that, it seems like it should be true, right? We did 8-count bodybuilders while Tap ran around and convinced himself of just that fact, and returned with his (incorrect) answer of True (originally, that lyric was not in the song at all).
    However, between Pope and Goose, “Christmas at Ground Zero” by Weird Al was correctly identified. The PAX did 5 8-count bodybuilders as a reward.

    We found a dry spot to alternate between 7 squats and 7 Aussie Angels (might be made up) while Safety Valve ran and pondered the question written for Paradox:
    T or F: The most popular Christmas candy bar in Louisiana is the Kit Kat.
    He returned with a very reasonable answer: True. However, according to the Paradox taxonomy of candy bars, everything is a candy bar, so the most popular candy bar in LA is actually the candy cane. So again, the correct answer was false.
    Goose identified that Dave Thomas and Rick Moranis were performing their version of the 12 Days of Christmas, but amazingly only knew their actual names, and not the characters Bob and Doug MacKenzie. Sometimes a man’s brain is too full of useful information and the useless stuff starts falling out. Sad.

    Pope was the last man, and was confronted with the most difficult true or false question of the day:
    True or False: Die Hard is a Christmas movie.
    We were about to do mountain climbers while he ran, but suddenly YHC heard Montana say something, which I swear was “why can’t we do something in this nice wet grass instead?” Thinking fast, YHC quickly changed the event to WW3 situps.
    Pope returned, answering True. My knee-jerk reaction was that this should be False (mainly because all the answers were false) but this subject has been famously debated, and I honestly wasn’t sure where I fell on this one… so YHC needed bit of time to think. Luckily, we had the other slice of bread for our Boxing Day Sandwich, and we were Set Adrift on Memory Bliss, as PM Dawn sampled Spandeau Ballet’s “True” and the PAX again bearcrawled 30 yards and Triple-Burpee-Broad-Jumped back. Twice.
    This time we had to deal with the wet and slippery grass, and through the fog I could see men crashing down around me. In my mind I heard Frank Costanza’s voice shouting, “I sent 16 of my own men to the latrines that night!” I pushed the guilt aside, trying to fix my mind on the Die Hard dilemma.

    We finished mostly unscathed (you okay, Valve?) and returned for COT. YHC reluctantly accepted Bluetube from Tana. Goose prayed us out.

    Great job as always men.
    SYITG,

    AB

    AB Cs the light (post credits-scene):

    I created this beatdown as a “Not really Christmas” theme. After Goose’s OG-Christmas-Carol-Only BD, and the newfangled trendy music of Tchaikovsky last week, all of the songs this morning were intentionally Christmas-adjacent at best.

    As far as the Die Hard dilemma goes… the arguments that it is a Christmas movie are many: The word “Christmas” is mentioned something like 18 times. More times than “die”, “hard”, “bomb”, “explode”, or “gun”. The setting is Christmastime during a company Christmas party.
    Sounds Christmas-y.

    But much like the beatdown today, it is superficial. Although I was wearing bad Santa pajamas, and there was a lot of talk about Christmas-y stuff, I only mentioned Jesus twice. Die Hard probably has zero references. I know, I know, you’re all saying, “But AB, what about the scripture ‘and the Lord spoketh “Yippee Kai-Ay.”’?’ I tell you then that is also false, and I compel you to admire the number of quotation marks used in the prior sentence. Pretty impressive, right?

    So the movie synopsis: a celebration of corporate greed is interrupted by terrorists/thieves who get theirs at the hands of a NYPD detective.
    Just like my beatdown, this has little to do with what Christmas actually is all about. And from that perspective, I find it hard to argue that Die Hard is a Christmas movie.

    I Know this Much is True.

  • OG Christmas – from Goose

    Though YHC enjoys the feelings produced by Christmas songs this time of year, nothing really compares to what a good Christmas carol does to you. Oh, yes–they’re two different things. Just do a Spotify search, and you’ll find your playlists provide two different experiences. As it turns out, Christmas has been around a lot longer than today’s version of Old St. Nick (only really popularized in his current form by Coca-Cola less than 100 years ago). But, sadly, most people haven’t experienced the deeper depths of the season, which can only be accessed via the old school Christmas carols, the English-language ones that have been around for centuries and can still be heard in the background of movies, commercials, and tasteful stores. You grew up with them, they’ve been around forever, but maybe you’ve never noticed them, or they’ve been drowned out by modern day noise like Bing Crosby, the Beach Boys, and color television. So, this morning, YHC decided to provide a little cultural healing via beautiful, age-old carols and burpees.

    We started with a warmup of the usuals with an eventually solid group of 8 PAX rounding out the circle where the blocks waited ominously.

    This was followed by a long-winded explanation of the above with instructions that a carol would play for about three minutes, during which we’d do 7 reps each of 3 exercises over and over while the PAX tried to guess the title of the carol. If they guessed it, no penalty, but if they didn’t, all would do 10 burpees. It went like this:

    * In the Bleak Midwinter:
    * AMRAP: 7 merkins, 7 squats, 7 BBSU
    -Valve: “Is this English?”

    * Holly and the Ivy:
    * Manmakers, curls, rows
    -Popeye: “Come ye Merry Gentlemen?”

    * Wassail Song:
    * Toe tappers, Appolo ono, WWI sit-ups
    -The only one the PAX got, despite having the three song title magicians (AB, Popeye, Suckle), and a Tana, in the mix; only got it because it says “Wassail” a bunch.

    * Lo, How a Rose E’er Blooming:
    * goblet squats, tricep press, WWIII situps
    -Valve: “I’m pretty sure this is the other one again.”
    -Popeye: “Joy to the Merry Gentlemen?”

    * Wexford Carol:
    * Werkins, lunges, Freddys
    -Tana: “This is Sara McLachlan, isn’t it.”

    * The Boar’s Head:
    * OHP, coupon swings, pull-throughs
    -White Meat: “Lucky Charms Christmas?”
    -Popeye: “Deck the Halls with Merry Gentlemen?”

    * Coventry Carol
    * Staggered merkins, block pooper squats, Afflecks
    -AB: “Yorkshire Carol? London Carol? Burmingham Carol? Shakespeare Carol?
    Stratford upon Avon Carol? Mr. Bean Carol?”

    * Gabriel’s Message:
    * SSH, 8-count bb, Bonnie Blairs
    -Popeye: “Renaissance Fest ye Merry Gentlemen?”

    Truth be told, YHC just wanted an excuse to listen to those songs, and those three-minute, three-exercises routines punctuated by burpees are a great way to get the heart rate cranking and the muscles burning without having to leave your spot.

    So, for homework, find a version you like of each of these (and the other awesome carols you might find on Spotify, like “Bring a Torch, Jeannette Isabella,” “In Dulci Jubilo”, “Once in Royal David’s City”, “Sussex Carol”, or “Ding Dong Merrily on High”) and put them during a long car ride with the fam. Unless, of course, you just want to keep letting Bieber tell you what he got for his girlfriend.

    SYITG,
    Goose

  • Long and Whining Road – from Honeysuckle

    The PAX arrived to a sub-40 degree, dew-covered Lion’s Den. They were beaming like an Eagle Sunrise with the confidence that YHC would keep their shoes clean and grassless. Valve was waiting behind Aldi until post-SSH’s. Chatter was at an 11.

    Waramarama: SSH, Imperial Walkers, Slow High Knees, Slow Butt Kicks, Arm Circles, Cherry Pickers, Windmills, Willie Mays Hayes

    The Thang:

    The demise of the Free Solo franchise has left an emptiness in the PAX the size of a time dilator. So YHC took it upon himself to reprise a Beatledown (thanks Prof Dox) following September’s AB-bey Road. Today would be a trip through the Let it Be album, and the discerning ears of today’s PAX would surely recognize it as the “Let it Be (Naked)” re-release, with a lot of the musical embellishments and chatter removed. Unfortunately, YHC would have a much tougher time removing chatter today.

    Get Back: PAX run around the civic center, and on the “Get Back” choruses, switch to nur.
    YHC advised the PAX to stay on the sidewalk, which further lulled them into a sense of dryness.

    Dig a Pony: Grab coupons, WWIII situps during verses, and 15 standard presses during the chorus. This was done on the sidewalk. Some pax saw moving diamonds in the sky (not sure about lucy).

    For you Blue: Head to the steps. 25 Johnny Dangers (calf raises), finish running up the steps, across to the other steps, head down and back around. “So we don’t just go back and forth? We have to run through the cold wet grass?” Yes.

    The Long and Winding Road: This is where it became full horror movie. Bear crawl snake was done in the grass. The pain felt in our hands was only eased by their eventual numbness. However, YHC was impressed at the speed that the bear crawl snake progressed.

    Two of Us: PAX paired up, did 10 partner derkins, partner drag to the other sidewalk, 10 more partner derkins (roles flipped), partner drag back. Valve and YHC wisely partnered up.

    I’ve got a feeling: Hillbilly walkers during song, and Bobby Hurley on every “oh yeah” and “oh no”. Only YHC had any idea of what was going on at this point, with the only consolation being that “don’t let me down” was coming up.

    One after 909: 9’s instead of 11’s. J-los on one side, wife pleasers on the other. No one completed these before the song was over, but we got sort of close.

    Don’t let me down: Rifle hold the coupon during the “don’t let me down” parts. Thrusters during each verse of the other parts. This was a chatter killer. One day, YHC may look back at this beatdown and decide that “Don’t Let Me Down” was the only decent thing we were able to pull out of this whole cold dewy mess.

    At this point there were 3 more songs to go (of a 35 minute album) but 3 minutes left, so we skipped to Let it Be and did Mary to wrap it up.

    COT: announcements, intentions, AB prayed us out

    Always a pleasure working out with this group. Lots of moving parts and jumping from one song to another definitely added confusion but at least it made the time go by more slowly. Maybe we’ll see another Beatledown in the future. Until then, may your life be filled with Cold Dewy Fields Forever.

  • Halloween 2: Brick or Crete – from Paradox

    It’s been a minute since YHC has gone full “get off my lawn” but nothing brings out the rose colored glasses quite like a good Americanized holiday so just hear me out.
    (If you can imagine me in a rocking chair with a pipe, jorts, mason jar, and a sleeveless Skynyrd shirt then it will help)

    Here’s the simple fact to address today boys…Trick or Treat has gone soft. I see you nodding at home. You have all seen it. Full sized candy bars, watered down jump scares , all treat with no trick. Amazon stock costumes that were 2-day shipped cus their parents forgot . Is this KitKat sigma or will I have to use your Skibidi? Does my hulk have enough Gyat for you?

    Where do we draw the line?

    Back in myyyy dayyy you got dropped off to “go work the hood” with a home made power ranger suit that was a red hoodie and a piece of rope for a belt and when you stepped on a porch the response could be anything from grandmas cough drops to a full R- rated murder simulation. Your jr high janitor dressed as a zombie and loaded on 5 bud heavies may grab your ankle as you run from the yard. You fled with a single kernel of candy corn and your life intact then you reset and head to the next house. Adrenaline in its purest form right there in the fall of 1995.

    And so today YHC says enough is enough. This is where I put my untethered hulk foot down.
    For 45 minutes we would harken to the days of old and restore the mystery of trick or treating .

    Duke!!
    Put down that Chinese menu and roll the footage! It’s the Halloween beatdown.

    8 pax strong at the Den which had been prepped and ready for Popeyes mayorial campaign rally later in the day. His 3 pronged platform has a massive following already but I’ll lay it out for you:
    1. bbq 2. Beer 3. Reduce unnecessary emails.
    (People with follow up questions are asked to leave)

    The pax pivoted to a well lit corner setup for the usual warmups as YHC arrived in full flex and had early concerns for vasoconstriction in my nether regions. They say you should dress for the job you want (more on that later) and while I’m not sure what that means for YHCs career our other costumed hero’s wanted a clear vision for their players and an infinity and beyond buzz from their drugs.
    Fred Lasseauxs whistle threatened to lead the beatdown all by itself but YHC pushed through and we got to the thang.

    ***Hidden Costume Honorable Mentions:
    -Goose as an alpha male that loathes a soft cadence

    Brick Indian Run
    Drop to 3 brick stars jumps while we got a good lather of Haloween tunes and YHC tried to drop a few lyrical hints for later.

    Da Thang

    Brick or Crete

    Each pax would experience the adventure of uncertainty and pick 1 ticket from the bucket.
    A few on there we didn’t get to so you can appreciate them now in the safety of your snuggy.

    B- Brick
    C- Crete
    L- Lyrics
    T- Trivia

    BRICKS
    1. Brickicide – Brick Release Merkins
    2. Brickicide – Brick SSH
    3. Brickicide Brick Star Jumps
    4. Let the bodies hit the Floor (plank – donkey kick on bodies , merkin on counts)
    5. Brick Thriller – brick burpees and side lunge brick raises on song

    CRETES
    1. When the Saints Go Marching In
    2. P1 OHP p2 run a lap around field
    3. 50 curls
    4. 50 skull crushers
    5. 10 saint makers

    LYRICS
    Incorrect guess will add 5 reps (5 guesses max)

    L-1Thriller
    L- 2 Superstitious
    L- 3 Werewolves in London

    TRIVIA

    T 1 Which Celtic festival did our modern customs of trick/treat and costumes originate ?
    (Samhain )

    T-2 In France this costume is illegal to wear over the age of 13 .
    (CLOWN)

    T 3 National retail federation names these the perennial number 1 costumes . One for adults , one for kids.
    1- witch
    2- princess

    Notes:
    -The pax burned up those two mosey breaks early and as predicted performed honorably in the trivia and lyrics divisions.
    -Saintmaker debut didn’t make any immediate Saints and may have destroyed a few friendships.
    -YHC lost his bricks in the Bermuda grass triangle of center field so often I think HS was chunking them when I wasn’t looking.
    -Brickicides might be my new fave routine. Def sequel material.

    We geared up and finished with a traditional “brick stabbed a guy with a trident” sprint to the flag to hide the evidence.

    Animal to Uncle Ronnie for his curling prowess.

    COT and HS prayed us out

    Thanks for monster smashing with me fellas. Grateful to lead.

    A Full Size Dox of Chocolates

    The Zordon Problem

    Ok, I’m officially off my soap box.
    I’ll put the pipe and mason jar up until next year. (Don’t take my Skynyrd shirt though )

    We’ll just let trick or treat be on probation for now. But here’s something for your coffee break.

    Every fall when it’s costume time I think back to the magical years of childhood where, for a few moments, it felt like I could actually become the red power ranger. Sure, Part of me realized that there may be far better career choices (stupid left brain) but the part that dominated YHCs psyche in 1995 was like “hey, I’m pretty decent working with others , the sword skills will follow right ? ”. But even with the gear, the attitude and the ninja skills I realized as a deflated 7 year old the real hard truth:

    I didn’t have a Zordon.

    As a quick crash course for the elders , Zordon was that floaty head guy that was responsible for fitting all the Power Rangers with their range of powers. He was essential for morphing Californian teens into legends of after school tv.
    So I had a clear goal and all the tools but realized I could ninja till ninjafinite and with no Zordon I would never don the red helmet. A real problem I couldn’t solve so I moved on to more immediate returns like bass fishing and Pokémon.

    I’m reminded of this , mostly , due to CS Lewis. Because at a certain time of my life this is exactly where I was “stuck” with Christianity. I had the mess that I knew my own self to be (a ratchet costume at best) on one end and the goal of being Christ-like (da OG Red Power Ranger) on the other end. Between the two seemed to be a mountainous gap of “well I’ll try to white knuckle it” or lots of “ it sure seems hopeless”.

    But CS Lewis’s book “Mere Christianity” helped to change this problem for me in a very powerful way. In the chapter “Let’s Pretend” he lays out the groundwork for truly being little Christs. You guys know I’m not much of a paraphraser so I’ve provided the two areas from the chapter that really brought this home for me:

    “You see what is happening. The Christ Himself, the Son of God who is man (just like you) and God (just like His Father) is actually at your side and is already at that moment beginning to turn your pretence into a reality.”

    “ It is not a question of a good man who died two thousand years ago. It is a living Man, still as much a man as you, and still as much God as He was when He created the world, really coming and interfering with your very self; killing the old natural self in you and replacing it with the kind of self He has.”

    There was the solution to the Zordon problem.

    We will never get there on our own or with purely human help but only with Him.

    Slowly and sometimes painfully morphing our make believe into His reality.

    Transforming our ambition into His will .

    Injecting our fears with His own Love.

    We are called to Put on Christ and my hope is it’s the last true costume we’ll ever need.

    SYITG
    Dox

  • Merkin mile reboot? And the Burpee and the Hammer! – from Smooth Operator

    YHC pulled up at 5:12 due to forgetting to put the two tires and maul in the truck the night before. YHC didn’t see any movement from the Doxs household this morning so i figured I’d park in the coveted Doxs parking spot. Little did I know I would be stealing his Thang from the beatdown before.

    Warmarama started immediately
    SSH
    Windmills
    Arm circles
    Cherry pickers
    Imperial walkers
    And a bumper mosey to get the juices flowing.

    And Yes Tana there is now a road where the bumper used to be.

    Thang 1

    Thang 1 merkin mile
    When YHC started, Tuesday Tuff was fairly new but it seemed to always start with a merkin mile around rich man’s loop.So that’s what I proposed to do this morning even with Gooses look of displeasure. Apparently a merkin mile was completed on Monday, and to be fair YHC had ever my intention of showing up said Monday but a call out fart sack was in my forecast for the day. Therefore YHC had a decision to make, do we deviate from the plan or do we get tuff on this Tuesday. Which is exactly what we did. YHC has a strange liking for the merkin mile even though it always ends with the entire PAX picking up the six (me). It reminds me that no matter how out of shape YHC gets, the PAX is there to welcome me back into the fold. The merkin mile consist of running a mile around rich man’s loop stopping every quarter mile to do 25 merkins ending back at the stage. Somehow this was AB’s first merkin mile and sounded like it wouldn’t be the last.

    After YHC recovered enough to make words we jumped right into Thang 2

    Thang 2 The burpee and the hammer

    When YHC started coming to beatdowns there seemed to be a big deal about burpees. The pax loved to give them out but hated to do them. Also YHC loves to hit thing with a hammer the bigger the hammer the better. Therefor we will be pounding a pair of tires with a 10 lb maul and we will work on all things burpee. The tire pounding timer will be ten swings at one tire, Bearcrawl with hammer to next tire and 10 more swings at that tire. Then bear crawl back. While this is taking place. The other pax’s will be at other stations

    Station 1 standard perfect burpee to work on form
    Station 2 manmakers or blockees for AB
    Station 3 goblet squats
    Station 4 4 thrusters
    Station 5 groiners shout out to YJ
    Station 6 hand release merkins
    Station 7 jump squats
    (This is not the actual order of stations, but YHC winged the order for no particular reason other than to make it more confusing on myself.)
    After one round of this with not much communication from the PAX and YHC checking the time on his phone way more than necessary we did a Lightning round of 3 swings Kareoke 3 swings kareoke back.
    After this we moved into 4 minutes of Mary.

    4 minutes of Mary
    WW1 sit-ups with terrible cadence presented by yours truly
    Dr. W’s by goose
    Freddy Merkins by AB
    V ups by Tana finishing perfectly on 0600.

    After this we had COT and talked about the upcoming convergence in NOLA and Safety Valve prayed us out. Thanks for embracing the suck with me.
    SYIYG
    Smooth Operator

  • Neuron Expanding Recreational Fun – from Paradox

    YHC has always been fascinated by what the human body can do under extreme pressure. YHC recently listened to a podcast interview of Cole Hocker, and he described basically blacking out on the last leg of his crazy gold medal 1500m finish. WILD right? But it got me to thanking. What could our “slightly less than gold medal track athlete” pax perform when given the right pressure.

    Early this year, AB introduced a paradigm shifting beatdown based on the fact that everyone knows an unhealthy amount of information about at least 1 or 2 topics. Sometimes, ashamedly so. It hooked several pax into the Learned Llama multiverse you see today plus introduced a new wrinkle to an already strong group of exercise/trivia pioneers. YHC has been tinkering with alternate versions of it since and below is the result.

    So here’s how the game works.
    YHC names an exercise for each round then Pax will Hold Al Gore around an ominous coupon pile.

    YHC will then name a list of words one by one with a few seconds in between for thanking.

    Your goal is to name the common factor of the list as fast as possible.
    You will get one shot per pax , if you are incorrect you will start SSH (later ti be converted to burps) until the round is over.
    If correct then we will stop on that round and do the corresponding reps (after 1 -10 reps , 2-20 etc)

    Example

    Brown (10) ….Black(20) …paddington (30) Polar (40) … Grizzly (50) … all bears and you have an increasing chance at getting the correct association but as options increase so do the reps.

    Duke!
    Glove up, summers over and we got some iron to sharpen!

    Standard warmup with that big Pax energy when several cars roll up at once that makes YHC all warm and fuzzy inside.

    We started where the Bible begins and most friendships end…with the members of Genesis.

    1.) Tony Banks
    2.) Mike Rutherford
    3.) Phil Collins
    4.) Peter Gabriel

    Early guesses at drummers but we went 30 Reps and there were grumbles that sounded an a lot like Sussidio.

    National Parks (Star Jumps)
    1. Teddy Roosevelt
    2. Glacier
    3. Arches
    4. Grand Canyon
    5. Yosemite

    AB flashing his generational trivia talent and we took 20 reps.

    Army Bases w “Fort” at the beginning (HR Merkins)

    1.) Campbell
    2.) Carson
    3.) Detrick
    4.) Bragg
    5.) Hood

    Had this loaded for Pop and he didn’t dissapoint with the early answer for 20 reps.

    Speed Skaters (Bonnie Blair’s )
    1.) johan olav Koss
    2.) Eric Heiden
    3.) JR Celski
    4.) Apollo Ohno
    5.) Bonnie Blair

    This one went deep for 40

    Pokémon (Coupon Curls )

    1.) Spearow
    2.) Pidgey
    3.) Weedle
    4.) Charizard
    5.) Pikachu

    Lil Cuz with the performance of the day. He blamed his 2.0 toy pile but we all know he’s got dat Arcanine in him.

    Satellites (Goblet Squats )
    1.) Terra
    2.) Aqua
    3.) LandSat8
    4.) Explorer 1
    5.) Sputnik

    40 Reps
    Not a peep from our resident beekeeper.
    The man just likes others to improve I guess.

    GI Joe (Ranger Merkins)
    1.) Roadblock
    2.) Shipwreck
    3.) Zartan
    4.) Duke
    5.) Snake Eyes

    30 reps
    Knowing is half the battle.
    Ranger Merkins are the rest.

    Members of *NSYNC (Apollo Ohnos)
    1.) Chris
    2.) Joey
    3.) JC
    4.) Lance
    5.) Justin

    TANA!!!!
    From the rafters the Peoples Rep saved the pax from atleast 20 extra Ohnos until we got to JT.

    Vice Presidents (box jumps)
    1.) James S Sherman
    2.) Levi P Morton
    3.) elbridge Gerry
    4.) John C Calhoun
    5.) dick Cheney

    40 box jumps were contended by pope who reported a whispered correct answer so we split the difference and did 25. Complex numbers are my thing.

    Triple Crown Winners (Carolina Dry Dox)

    1.) Omaha
    2.) Gallant Fox
    3.) Seattle Slew
    4.) American Pharoah
    5.) Secretariat

    30 Reps as Maneater started to heat up.

    CMM (Thrusters)
    1.) Birdman
    2.) Turk
    3.) BG
    4.) Manny Fresh
    5.) Lil Wayne

    Maneater again
    He’s On Fire!

    Heisman trophy winners ( Merkins )
    1.) Jay Berwanger
    2.) Billy Sims
    3.) Steve Spurrier
    4.) Desmond Howard
    5.) Tim Tebow

    A few chuckles at Wanger but then HS got down to business and ID’d spurrier as a champion.
    30 reps.

    Bankrupt Companies
    (Decline Merkins)

    1.) pacific gas and electric company
    2.) Washington mutual
    3.) Silicon Valley Bank
    4.) Lehman brothers
    5.) Enron

    30 reps as mutiple pax supplied this one.

    DDay Beaches – WW3 sit-ups

    1.) Sword
    2.) Gold
    3.) Juno
    4.) Utah
    5.) Omaha

    Pope/Pop are a force of military history to be reckoned with.

    Van Gohg paintings (Thrusters)
    1.) The potato eaters
    2.) almond blossoms
    3.) cafe terrace at night
    4.) self portrait w bandaged ear
    5.) starry night

    40 Reps to finish us out but these larks were saved by the bell.

    COT and Prayer intentions
    HS prayed us out

    Amazing seeing the collective pax mind under pressure. The hidden talents of this group never cease to amaze YHC.

    Thanks for the privilege to lead.

    -A Dox of Chocolates

    Imagine you are one of 86 billion brain cells. All with important tasks for sending and receiving messages at 100 meters/second. The capability to solve complex formulas, write ballads , or serve your fellow man awaits at a moments notice. Butttt instead you only get one assignment. Just once in 40 years you will be asked to associate the memory of two random NSYNC band members and It will save many men from coupon thruster destruction.

    “Bye, bye, bye” you whisper when the job is complete, then you return to brain cell retirement singing Kokomo at random intervals.

    No Neuron left behind.
    But leave no Neuron where you found him.

    SYITG
    Dox

  • Keep Thibodaux Weird – from Paradox

    YHC has been privileged to play a role in many of the storied F3 Thibodaux Schisms through the years. Sometimes as an ardent supporter, other times, ashamedly, as a lead instigator. As the great Creed Bratton once remarked “…more fun as a follower, but you make more money as a leader”. While his comment may have been referring to cultish behavior, I think the general principle applies here and I’ve now met my weekly quota of Creed quotes. And so, it’s with this schism experience that YHC feels qualified to observe the subtleties present in schism infancy. It starts at an almost undetectable level. Just a slight twitch of the eyelid during Smashmouth Allstars. Then it builds. A facial wince when you hear mainstream 90s classics and you start to avoid people that use the term “Champagne Supernova” for all the things that are great in their life. Followed by audible disdain to your cohorts about one genre/decade being more elite than another. Then, like clockwork there is a “boiling over” event. For example, no one recognizing “Lucas with the Lid Off” followed by GroupMe affirmations for the more recognizable 3rd Bass “Pop goes the Weasel” (complete random example). And just like that we are off to the races. A few laugh emojis don’t go your way and your supper doesn’t taste as sweet. You get backed into a corner and know the only way out is weapons of eardrum destruction you’ve been hiding in the dark for years, ready to lash out at moment’s notice. You dig in, readying your Spotify missiles for a lengthy war and you begin searching through old LimeWire and Napster accounts…

    But not today my brothers.

    Today, just like your optometrically prescribed headband, we will promote healing!

    But how?

    How could we thaw the frozen hearts of 90s genre elitism?

    YHC saw only one way out.

    A single artist.

    His work spanning 4 decades.

    No genre left standing in his wake.

    Today we would utilize him as an instrument of peace.

    Today..we would get WEIRD.

    Duke get your accordion and play that funky bean footage!!

    9 pax warmup of the usuals, highlighted by two late arriving ecofriendly PAX vehicles. Tanas fueled by the hard labor of rural PCPs and ABs running off his own supply of colon-to-tank methane.

    THE CONCERT THANG

    Simple and direct today.
    We would take the top 5 Weird Al hits, modify them a touch and enjoy some of the finest lyrics created in the last 40 years. YHC would sprinkle in trivia between songs.

    Correct 10 curls

    Incorrect 25 Monkey Humpers because with the trivia masterminds present you have to up the ante. These llamas play for keeps plus Pope is now 20/20 on beatdown Star Wars trivia.

    # 1 White and Nerdy
    Holding coupon Scissor Kicks , Swap on White and Nerdy , Coupon presses while holding 6 inches on song

    What famed physicist is in his library? (Hawking)
    In the song He denotes a numeral value referencing a polygon associated with this famed mathematician? (Pascal)

    10 Curls for Correct Hawking, 25 MH’s for lack of Pascal knowledge.

    #2 The Saga Begins
    Trigger on Star Wars characters and planets , and Jedi
    Around the galaxy lunges during song, Jungle Boi squat on triggers

    Which Star Wars movie specifically was Bring parodied in this song? (Phantom Menace)
    Jar Jar Binks species and home planet ? (Gungan, Naboo)
    Meaning youthful and untrained , anakin is referred by this term during his early Jedi training? (Padawan)

    # 3 Eat It
    Big Boys with Coupon , Sitting OHP on Eat It’s

    Beat it 2008 was a poorly received tribute done by this pop group ?
    Black eyed peas- Again, YHC’s error at mis labeling legumes and black eyes but the pax really needed dat lactic acid boost so we did 25 MHs.

    # 4 Amish Paradise —YHC’s personal favorite of the collection.
    Inchworm crawl out to HR Merkin during song
    Thrusters on Paradise

    The song parodied here was the #1 teach featured on the soundtrack of this 1995 movie ? (Dangerous Minds)
    Can’t you just imagine AB in his freshman dorm watching Dangerous Minds in his Jncos and chain wallet, a couple Oasis poster on wall. Life is Good!
    The teacher in this film played by whom and is nicknamed what? WHITEBREAD
    Goose was awarded partial credit for attempts at White Witch and 10 MHs were deducted.

    #5 FAT
    Squat side Kicks , Bonnie Blair’s on fat
    This parodied song was originally planned as a duet with what other royalty of 80s rock ? (Prince)
    **As the day unfolded our local investigative journo Mr. Wilford Montana unearthed an entire Prince vs MJ beef that is quite a rollercoaster including Prince trying to run over MJ in a parking lot followed by MJ calling Prince a “meanie” for the attempted vehicular manslaughter.

    We needed a recovery mosey to really smell the Nirvana and Goose needed to show King Pickleball he still has enough Sprint coverage for all the dead zones.

    Captain D’s bestowed the Animal to Valveline, noted that he rubbed some dirt on a fractured foot and posted all week.

    Valve awarded Jedediah Dawson aka Pope yet another well-deserved Fire Within for pumping out sitting OHPs while telling YHC Weird Al was too weird for his taste..hmmm…must be a Pete Gabriel guy.

    COT and Goose prayed us out

    Thanks for getting Weird with me today fellas

    POSTingSCRIPTs

    You know those safety signs in plants that denote “X number of days since the last safety incident”?

    Well, at F3 Thibodaux the peace of Weird Al led to a combined schism healing of 32 minutes before a recurrent 90s Pax villain threatened to reveal his Offspring and an Ace up his sleeve in the near future. This, in turn, stirred up at least two other delinquents who promptly started calling each other Aswads… and we were back at square one with 45 minutes of hard earned therapy down the toilet. The only course left was an apology…

    To Mr. Weird Alfred Matthew Yankovic:

    I tried your methods and found them useful but we may need a longer treatment plan to Smash these Pumpkins. Its like I’m trying to Reel in a Big Blowfish, not just a Hootie, but I’m keeping a Third Eye Blind to the mid 40’s Dinosaur Jr’s with no respect for the Pax still in the Green River of their youth.

    I’m just trying to save some Collective Souls in this Asylum but the more I fight for the Right to Party the more I realize that some of these Ricks just like to Roll and the rest of these goo goo dolls prefer to troll. Some are happy to see Dave Mathews churn, but some, well some just want strike a Matchbox 20 and watch it Burn.

    Thank you for keeping it Weird Mr. Al

    See you in the Grunge

    Dox

  • Dadlympics 2024 – from Paradox

    776 BC is widely recognized as the year of the first Olympic games. It began with an annual foot race, a stadion, and blossomed into the over 200 competitions we have today. Origin stories vary but many agree the race began as a simple challenge between friends…or rivals (perhaps both). Many Greek men of this era were very practiced at coalescing into groups at a predetermined area, in the wee dawn hours, one leading calisthenia while the others followed. In Greece, just as in F3 , It only takes a few meetings for the bonds to build, then the comparing of athletic feats follows. As one can imagine, these groups consisted of a variety of characters from the community and YHCs research led to the discovery of ancient sea scrolls depicting an early gathering (meticulously translated to Redneck) as such :

    Upon the Peltchaneus thoroughfare these men gathered:

    Maximus Goosicus -aged learned philosopher, forged in the wisdom of deka kids but the fire within steadily burning though know one truly knows are the flames of his heart or of his bowels?

    Valvenus Saefetyfurst- arriving in the days highest technology chariot. He considers his bronze edition the best, if he only knew his descendants would go platinum and beyond.

    Cuzin Lillius de Punisher-
    beard so thick and luxurious he regarded all face shields as the highest insult. Teaches in the vernacular of Yee Yee.

    Cardinalus of Thebodux- constantly boasting his athletics feats were better served in the Aegean Sea, he would be the origin of all future Olympic swimming. It would take a few years for the sport to gain popularity but it would take millennia to remove his fartsack reputation.

    Montanius de Wilford – returning to glory after many pickled countries were conquered. Only Hippocrates could explain how a 1 day knee injury in February led to 46 pickle tournaments and zero beatdowns but we’ll leave that to the medical historians.

    2,800 years later another group of men would establish another great tradition of athletic excellence. This one to honor the physical, mental , and spiritual battle of being a dad.

    Welcome to the Dadlympics

    Duke
    Light the torch and Roll the beautiful footage !

    Warmup
    9 pax for an intimate Saturday setting and the only thing you really need to know about warmups is Goose unveiled The Fire Within. The remaining warmup period was spent sneaking looks while Goose shook his head and said “hey my eyes are up here buddy! “
    Like a true work of classical art you can appreciate a different beauty with every glance. Huge shout to Gooses M for finding this diamond and allowing it to serve the masses.

    YHC then announced that this day we would honor the duties of a father in 3 parts of Dadlympic glory.

    1. The Track
    2. The Field
    3. The Battleground

    Opening Ceremony
    Indian Run to EDW track with the “torch “ (ole hickory bar)
    Last man drop to 5 torch raises

    Thang 1 —-TRACK

    It doesn’t take long to learn lesson number one as a father…. that your kids are stone cold crazy and programmed to run themselves into direct harm.
    So our first feat would be a “catch me if you can”
    -P1 5 burpees, P2 bur until caught
    -complete 1 track lap

    This crew was barely ruffled and Valves whoop was still logging a sleep HR.

    Next we needed to switch gears into the fatherhood mental toughness test. Balance the budget? Practice a parking lot confrontation? No my friends, we had to go into the deepest waters of Dadversity …the dad joke. Goose had been training us since mid May with his legendary 300 plus merkins dad joke mile and YHC wanted to gift him a few chances to flex his talents and test his troops.

    YHC would give 1/2 of the dad joke then we would fartlek our way around the track with time to think and taste our own brand.
    The answers were then revealed and merkins were used as reward or punishment.

    Here’s a sample of my fave 3 :

    -I have a joke about trickle down economics….(pause and heavy breathing) …but 99% of you won’t get it.

    -I used to run a dating service for chickens…but I was struggling to make hens meet

    – Why couldn’t the produce manager make it to work …he could drive but he didn’t Avacado .

    Goose set the tone with early recognition of ole Phillipe Flop (a Frenchman’s sandals) and Lil Cuz consistently sprinkled in multiple timely assists including a full length dissertation on poultry pronouns. Valve thought alot about the lack of quality neighbors and PCPs in this region. Tana seemed to enjoy the cardio without the heavy burden of paddle sponsorships and endorsement obligations.

    We swapped the fartlek transport for burpee broad jumps (to simulate jumping living room legos) and continued the competition.

    Ending with this doozy….

    -You used to be able to get air at the gas station for free, now it’s a dollar …guess that’s inflation for you .

    A mosey was necessary just to clear the air of the stench of a joke of that caliber .
    The heart can only withstand so much.

    Thang 2—Field

    A dad must be able to flex his dad strength with a legendary single car load trip. The goal here is to show the other dads on the beach where the straps were digging into your wrist so they will burn with jealous rage.

    Carry the Beach Equipment

    P1 garner carry through the “crowd”
    P2 flutter kicks

    The most important of the field events involved practicing to throw your child into that dizzying hybrid of joy and fear.

    Toss your kid to infinity and beyond
    P1 Thrusters
    P2 coupon piggy back ride (nice edit on a YHC miscalculation)

    The Thang Finale —-Battle Field

    American Dadiator

    Rules :

    3 cones in a rough triangle (non Bermuda because I’m still mad) with a bucket of water balloons at each .
    2 pax with a 2.0 defender at each station.
    Center hoola hoop with 10 tennis balls

    Goal is to be the team with the most tennis balls at the end of the game .
    -2.0 defend the nest with pool noodle (3 burpees if hit)
    -5 merkins to get a tennis ball
    -If you get hit with a balloon you owe 3 burpees and you drop your tennis ball
    -10 minutes on the clock

    Teams :
    TanaCuz (picachu )
    ValveDox (gecko)
    Office of Parish Support (Duke)

    Notes :
    – very firm water balloons dont burst and become rubber riot control pellets , there are tattoos to prove it
    – The 2.0 defended nests with deadly accuracy.
    – Several alliances were formed, broken , betrayed, reformed and in general I think we covered 1000s of years of world history with balloons and pool noodles.

    When the smoke cleared Lil Cuz and Tana took the W by one tennis ball thanks to a late assault on the office parish support castle.

    Gear up and back to the flag

    YHC awarded the first Golden Dad to Lil Cuz for his overall performance in the battle, sharp dad joke knowledge and outstanding attitude to laugh and display joy when faced with burpees in soaking wet socks.

    Goose awarded YHC with The Fire Within for cooking with excessive shenanigans when today’s recipe only called for mild shenanigans.

    Lifetime YhC achievement list update :
    1: children being born
    2: being awarded TFW

    COT and Cardinal prayed us out

    At the end of the day as Fathers we are preparing our sons and daughters for the spiritual battle of real life. God provides us many tools of both offense and defense. And just like in our ballooned battle today it doesn’t stop each day from feeling chaotic. It doesn’t stop us from failing when we feel so close to a victory. In fact it can often feel like being busted in the neck with a water balloon after sprinting 50 yards only to do 3 burpees and try again . But if we can stop in the midst of the battle and see His provisions all around us and if we can trust Him, then we can lean on what He gives us. Looking back on the last few years I am truly grateful for the crew He has provided in F3. I hope you all enjoyed a day honoring your fight as Dadiator and I look forward to struggling along side you.

    See you at the ‘25 games

    Dox

  • Stay off the grass. – from Popeye

    YHC arrived early to the den, noting a special kind of gloom in the air…
    Was it rain? No, looked good despite early forecasts. Perhaps the prospect of just two more days of work drudgery left in the week? No, my morning trek to the big sleazy and hours of staring at screens and tiresome conversations lied in wait.
    No, this special kind of gloom is the kind that brings a smirk to all smirkster’s faces… the kind of gloom one only gets to relish once in this life: when a VQ becomes a Q.
    Primed at the thought of getting comfortable being uncomfortable and sharing some positive pain with my fellow man, YHC dashed around the field of play like a cardboard sign fairy placing treats for the pax. It was going to be a fine morning.

    Warmarama:
    Imperial walkers (yes, a strict violation of protocol – one of YHC’s favorite things)
    Willie Mays Hays
    Mountain climbers
    (confessional about hating SSH)
    SSH x 50 just to throw fuel on the internal fire
    Wamarama complete, time to do some work.

    Preface:
    As most know, YHC has spent his adult life wearing the uniform of this great nation, and as such I felt compelled to share some similarities between F3 and military PT basics. Fun/bizarre names for calisthenics, “starting position move, in cadence – exercise!”, people taking it too seriously or not seriously enough – it’s the stuff that forms your foundation. But one specific element is different: in the service, you stay off the grass.
    For walking on the grass is indicative of a weak moral fiber; the man who needs to cut across the grass is the man who needs the shortcut. He’s the guy who fails to plan, and thus plans to fail. He’s the guy who orders his fitness regimen in a shot he can administer himself at home while watching sitcoms and eating chips.
    For today’s beatdown there were two rules:
    You rest in the forward-leaning rest position, and you stay off the grass; violations incur a 5 burpee fine.

    Thang 1:
    Pax directed to form 2 ranks. YHC immediately realized the pax were not accustomed to miltaryish terminology, so I directed 2 columns. Still not quite there, but it was time to mosey.
    Lap 1: Grass-free lap around the far reaches of the Harangarang, including the rarely-traveled sidewalk out front. Easy 20-30% effort pace, the kind that encourages chatter from the AB’s and Enrons of the world.
    Lap 2: The Pax upped the ante a bit, pushing the pedal to 60-70% effort. Not a sprint, but a heavy stride – the kind that breeds more gasp and less chatter. Lap ended in a pseudo-tunnel along the edge of the Harang center for fine arts and bullriding.

    Thang 2/Main event:
    The Pax were introduced to 5 stations:
    1 – 10 flights up near stairs; single or double step
    2 – 10 x WW3 sit ups + 10 Block-ees
    3 – 20 Bus Stop Derkins + 20 LBC’s
    4 – 20 Kettle/Coupon swings + 20 Apollo Ono (2=1)
    5 – 5 flights up yonder stairs, bunny hops

    Pax reluctantly broke into groups of 3, headed out to starting points, and we were off. Most teams made 3ish rounds of exercises, with YHC making some mental notes while playing third wheel to a Goose/Dox man date:
    – Not all stations are created equal, which disrupts the time/space continuum. Next time spread out the most painful station.
    – Even the JBL has its limits on the field of battle, the volume peaked but couldn’t really reach all stations (much to AB and YJ’s delight).
    – You never know who you’re going to meet at the bus stop! While derkining, MomJeans appeared out of thin air and joined in, and YHC was thankful for another member to break up the Dox/Goose blossoming bromance. As an aside, it was impossible not to be impressed with the bus stop’s solar-paneled roof – what is this, the future!?! Perhaps Thib is more progressive than I realized; I knew we were ahead of the times in teenager-looking eye doctors, but this was really inspiring.
    – Bunnies are underestimated in the animal kingdom, hopping doesn’t get easier the more you do it.
    – In a circuit format beatdown, insert rests, lest the the Pax take it upon themselves to insert slow strolls between stations like they’re browsing at TJ Maxx.

    Time was called and Aslan beckoned, with most Pax opting to traverse the grass and close out with a 5 burpee fine.

    Announcement:
    Downs 5k for Saturday, for those few who have miles left in them after RCR.

    COT / Ponzi prayed us out.

    Appendix: Appreciate the opportunity to lead the beatdown, and there will be more to come down the line. It’s funny how after being “in charge” so many times in my adult life, for a while now I’ve just enjoyed just doing as directed by the Q and seeing our brothers grow in ability and creativity. And it’s not lost on me that in the past I’ve led some people who are literally being paid to work out and push themselves physically don’t show the drive and passion and camaraderie we have amongst our group. Proud to be a part of this and SYITG.

  • Choose your Poi, Son! – from America’s Best

    Unbeknownst to many, YHC spent his small kid time in Hawaii… AB was just a barefoot Haole, speaking pidgin, surfing with an alien I thought was a dog, working as a private investigator, and flying around in T.C.’s helicopter. This beatdown was inspired by those days. . .

    The PAX rolled in, totaling a dozen by the time Dilly rolled on… so we began Warmarama… a bit of a pickle since we only had 10 coupons. But, like a glorious Chesapeake Bay Retriever, Paradox broke out of the circle, leapt out in to the gloom, and returned with a giant black stick that would have to suffice.

    Island 1: Hawai’i (The Big Island):

    Constantly in fear that a volcano was about to erupt, YHC’s early visits to this island were always a bit nightmarish. We pay tribute today to this childhood fear with Volcano by the late, some-say-great, Jimmy Buffet. Hold Al Gore. Burpee on “I don’t know.” Tuck jump on “Volcano.”

    Mom Jeans’ hatred of Jimmy Buffet during this segment was noted, catalogued, and will be weaponized in a future beatdown.

    Island 2: Maui – the Man, the Myth, the Island

    The trickster demigod was definitely present during this well-planned, expertly explained, and piss-poorly executed portion of your entertainment.
    The plan was a Kola (which is the closest phonetic match to Dora, since there is no “D” or “R” in the Hawaiian alphabet). Pair up, one partner is Maui, pushing up the sky (coupon presses) while the other is his brother, tricked into pulling up islands from the sea floor(moving coupons). Then Flapjack, and 2nd partner takes over the presses while partner 1 moves the coupon back to the start. The explanation was much longer, murkier, and nobody in the PAX was clear on whether they were Maui, his brother, or themselves, so everyone was moving islands all over the ocean.

    Admittedly, this part was half-baked at best. And so YHC went into full-on Dad/Tech Support mode (“Move!”) and just walked everyone through a new version: Walk backwards, with alternating sets of curls and goblet squats. A more well-planned Maui beatdown is guaranteed next time.

    Island 3: O’ahu… choose your Poi, son!

    One of my earliest memories was at a luau, learning about poi, a Hawaiian food staple. Hard to describe, it’s a fermented paste of pounded taro root. It’s like if yogurt and sweet potato had a baby. And then you ate out of that baby’s diaper.
    Anyway, you typically classify it based on consistency: “one-finger”, “two-finger”, or “three-finger”, based on how many fingers are required to scoop it up.
    So here, participants are asked to choose which poi they want. And like poi, with each added finger it gets more runny:
    1-finger poi: Roll die, do 7x that many burpees and WWII sit-ups, with murder bunnying and bear crawling (least runny/no running)
    2-finger poi: Roll die, do that many laps with 2x that number of blockees as buy-in for each lap
    3-finger poi: Run/nur until you find the Run-Cajun-Run sticker on a lamp post; then 3 burpees and run back (most runny)

    Without hesitation, Honeysuckle chose 3 and lead the other gazelles off into the unknown gloom.
    Seeming the most innocuous, 2-finger poi proved to be the most difficult. Those were the real tough guys. . .who didn’t do the math first.
    Enron and YHC were the only two bold enough to try the 1 finger poi, and were rewarded for our bravery by finishing first.

    Final Thang: The Ring of Fire
    The Ring of Fire is also a belt of volcanos surrounding the Pacific. So we did the typical Ring of Fire, but (Inner) “Circles” by Soul Coughing was played instead of the usual Johnny Cash song…
    About 2 minutes into the ‘roid rage, YHC offered to stop the thang if anyone could ID the artist… and decided to mention “this is a 10-minute song, by the way.”
    Only Popeye had even heard this song before. And so, a minute later, desperation set in, and Yankee Jeaux jumped up to check the phone and call out the artist to stop the torture.
    The song was over anyway. YJ cheated, but YHC lied.

    Pau.
    COT and Yankee Jeaux prayed us out.

    Something for my Llamas:
    Nobody knew why that song by the Animals was played this morning amongst the Hawaii-themed music. YHC’s favorite volcano is Haleakala… which is Hawaiian for “House of the (rising) Sun.”
    Another bit of trivia for you: The Hawaiian Islands were once called the Sandwich Islands, but the name was changed because it brought too much shame when Firehouse Subs was founded.

    Tanks for coming out, bruddahs. Always an honor to lead. Great seeing the consistency of White Meat (that sounds weird) and that Ponzi is posting again on the regular. And some guy named Wilford Montana made my day by showing up (sans coffee) to join us.

    SYITG,

    AB