F3 New Orleans

Tag: The Stage

  • Y’allTide Christmas Party – from Lil Cuz

    It was a week before Christmas and all around the Stage, pax gathered for a VQ, some were excited while others were anticipating a History of Lockport theme beatdown. YHC had other plans and felt like a Christmas Party was more in order with a suddenly and uncharacteristically cold Louisiana December morning approached this close to Christmas.
    We started with what quickly became a crowd favorite from another recent VQ (Thanks GOATs for the great idea!) but with one little Christmas change.

    “THE GRINCH” – Play off of Leeroy Jenkins – If any one yells “THE GRINCH” all Pax must sprint to the nearest tree or bush and run back to scare him off from stealing Christmas.
    With the theme laid out and the hidden mini game introduced, the party started albeit with one Pax who had the ever-crucial music and BAPS was running late. My mind went to those lame parties with no music and people just standing around awkwardly waiting to leave and go home.

    Thang 1: Rich Man’s Loop – Christmas Themed Trivia – wrong answer results in 5 Carolina Dry Docks and sprint to next lamp post.

    As we were bout halfway through the Loop I noticed another runner a street away and thought “Man, who is this crazy guy running with us from a distance.” As he approached behind and scared a few Pax, the Music man himself, Yankee Joe, had arrived and the Party was saved. Our next thang was secured and the dancing would begin. No more worries of party goers thinking of an excuse to get home and put their pajamas on.

    Trivia Questions that were asked if anyone wants to ask their families and see if they get better scores than us:

    1. What is the highest grossing Christmas movie of all time?
    a. Home Alone Correct

    2. In “Home Alone”, where are the McCallister’s going on vacation when they leave Kevin behind?
    a. Paris Correct

    3. What is the best-selling Christmas song?
    a. “White Christmas” by Bing Crosby Correct

    4. When do the earliest gingerbread cookie recipes date back to?
    a. 2400 B.C. Incorrect

    5. In what modern-day country was St. Nicholas born in?
    a. Turkey Correct

    6. How many gifts in total were given in “The Twelve Days of Christmas” song?
    a. 364 Incorrect

    7. Three of Santa’s reindeer’s names begin with the letter “D”. What are those names?
    a. Dancer, Dasher, and Donner Correct

    8. What popular Christmas song was actually written for Thanksgiving?
    a. “Jingle Bells” Correct

    9. At what age was St. Nicholas made a Bishop?
    a. 30 years old Incorrect

    10. Name 2 things St. Nicholas is the patron saint of. Incorrect
    a. Sailors
    b. Children
    c. Wolves
    d. Pawnbrokers

    Thang 2: F3 White Elephant – Pax circle up with dice block exercises and the deck of death. Pax select between dice and deck for a random exercise chosen for them by fate. Pax can then either choose to do the exercise or pass it along to another Pax. If passed then you have to choose the other exercise selection method. The chosen pax must complete the exercise while all others do an exercise of YHC’s choosing. Admittedly, YHC ran out of exercises rather quickly and was graciously helped by the circle of Pax. Once the fateful exercise has been completed it moves to the next pax in the circle. We went two rounds as not many were wiling to pass along the harder exercises to others except after Yankee
    decided to slow his pace while the circle was in mission impossible plank. He was promptly paid back by Goose with 20 burpees on his own as our one and only “White Elephant” gift. No others decided to test those waters as it was cold this December morning.

    Thang 3: Louisiana Christmas Sled Race (Wheel Barrel Race): Partner Up for a Wheel Barrel Race across the field and switching barrel on the way back.
    – Punishment for losers are 10 Burpees. Last place adds 5 merkins to burpees. Winner relishes in their breather.

    Congratulations to our Winners!: Yankee Joe And Enron even though Dox and I almost pulled off the upset.

    Last Place was Goose and FencePost with the mumble chatter expected for Losers having a harder punishments.

    10 minutes of Mary to finish this VQ, COT, and Yankee prayed us out.

    F3 has meant a lot to me fellas and I appreciate each and every one of you. Thank you for pushing me harder and making me do things I didn’t expect I can do. I look forward to all future beatdowns and look forward to a day where I too can be #TuesdayTuff.

    SYITG,
    Lil’ Cuz

  • The beatdown to Bethlehem – from Enron

    After Tuesday’s (#tuesdaytuff) cardio heavy beatdown, YHC was ready for some slower, heavier movements, or just not ready for any more cardio. It seemed to be the perfect timing for a themed beatdown that had been drawn up the night prior with the help of a much more creative wife. The stage was set as YHC pulled up to a much familiar look of a minivan awaiting the arrival of more PAX. Yankee Joe was ready as usual. As 4 more PAX arrived in the gloom, we had plenty of pre-thang time to discuss the many schisms that have been dividing the Thibodaux PAX for decades, OK, well maybe just the past 6 months. This mumble chatter did not slow down as the warmups began, and YHC decided it would be a good time to test his newly acquired (thanks Goose) pre-cadence call. This did not go over well with about half of the group while the other half took it in stride, hence the building of a divide. We quickly learned, or were directed to, who was the leader of pre-mentioned schisms. The usually ultra-quiet and very reserved in his words, Paradox, has decided to form groups on each side… again. Goose, in all his wisdom, informed us that Cardinal (on IR) also enjoy the great divides of this PAX, but is a “seeker of truth” and is always looking for the “correct” side to be on. Although, JBL, #whoopteam, “starting position, in cadence, ready position move” (or however it goes), #Tuesdaytuff (ok twice is enough); will always be the right side.

    Warmup with waaaay too much chatter in between, to where YHC had no idea what number we were on:

    SSH, AC, Cherry Pickers, Windmills, Grass Grabbers, Self-Love, IW, bumper mosey

    The Thang: Journey to Bethlehem

    After reading an extensive amount of information on many different Christmas topics, a theme was finally coming to light. We tend to read in the Bible the journey to Bethlehem every year but how often is it discussed just how dangerous and difficult that journey had to be. The trip was approximately 90 miles between Nazareth and Bethlehem that would have taken place most likely over 10 days (leaving December 15th to be perfect for the beatdown). A pregnant Mary, and husband Joseph traveled all of this distance, outside, while moving through the Jordan river, through the hills of Jerusalem, and battling animals, potential sickness, and weather the entire time. This is how the following was developed.

    We picked up coupons and moseyed to the beginning of rich mans loop, where approximately 15 light poles are spaced about 40 yards apart.

    YHC instructed the PAX that there would be 3 alternating methods of carrying the coupon between the poles as follows:

    Mary- carry at stomach height, as if pregnant
    Joseph- On the shoulder, as if carrying wineskins filled with water
    Donkey – Rifle carry as if you were the donkey and carrying Mary

    Each light post would have a “hazard” of which Mary and Joseph could have encountered that included an exercise. Most exercises were performed OYO except for a couple. The following were performed at each light pole with the alternating carry methods (Mary, Joseph, Donkey) in between. The slower carry between had plenty of time to discuss just how tuff #tuesdaytuff (last time) was, especially without Paradox.

    Light Pole “obstacles/hazards”:
    Walk through the Jordan River – 10 Bonnie Blairs (the hard way)
    Climb the hills outside Jerusalem – 20 Mountain climbers – in cadence
    Tame your donkey – 10 Jack ass Webbs- this was a burpee but with a donkey kick during the thruster
    Be strong enough to fight off animals #1 – 25 Merkins
    Sleep on your back on the ground – 25 coupon presses
    Lift Mary on the donkey – 30 squats (no coupon)
    Fight off more animals – 30 coupon curls
    Carry the water overhead – 15 OHP
    Outrun the animals – Sprint with coupon
    Move through the jungle/heavily forested Jordan Valley – 15 Jungle Boy Squats
    Wear your big boy pants – 20 Big Boys
    Battle Sickness – 15 Burpees
    Hold the weight of the world on your shoulders – 10 Perfect Merkins
    Give God the glory – 25 Heals to Heaven
    Turned away at the Inn – Run to next light pole (this light pole was out making the reference perfect)
    Have baby Jesus! – 50 LBCs

    Thang 2: Song
    “Jingle Bell Rock” – Hold Al Gore for duration and squat on Jingle
    This made the PAX looks like whack-a-mole moles with how many “jingles” there were and how uncoordinated we can look at times.

    2 minutes of Mary with Freddie Mercury’s and Penguins

    COT and Goose prayed us out. Thanks for the laughs to go along with this one. I hate to admit it but the mumble chatter only added to the fun. As always, enjoyed being in the gloom with these guys.

  • Superfun(d)elight – from Goose

    After Tana’s block-buster 13 Days of/till Christmas yesterday, YHC knew we needed to take it easy on the big, heavy movements, which usually translates into a lot more running. Per usual, YHC didn’t think this one would be a memory maker, but was happy to be proven wrong.
    Warmups of the usual with the addition of some Hairy Rockettes (straight leg out to opposite hand extended off to one side, then switch to the other) to loosen up the hammies. As expected, Enron executed these with poise and precision. Yankee Joe shared some unusually deep knowledge about life as a real Rockette, which threatened to throw YHC into a rabbit hole of questions, but I held strong and the first Thang was explained:

    To Superfun(d)’s delight we started with a Merkin Mile, which reminded him of his first beatdown, the IPC titled “Death by Skinny Runner”. The fact that he’s still coming after that first experience remains one F3 Thibodaux’s unsolved mysteries, and PAX’s admiration for that superhuman resolve runs deep!
    A Merkin Mile is a mile with stops for 25 merkins every quarter mile. YHC used the Runkeeper app, one of many that will audibly tell you when you’ve reached certain distances, times, etc. A pre-beatdown toilet visit provided YHC the opportunity for tinkering with the app, which revealed the option for the voice to be changed to “Boston fan” among others. So, in honor of Yankee Joe, I chose that one, and it did not disappoint. (It started by telling us to “Put on ya big girl pants, and lets get that heart (“haht”) rate up!”). The first 25 merkins weren’t too bad, but the last three were much harder than the PAX expected–I remembered being surprised by this one when I first did it on the Northshore, but truth be told, stacking up sets of 25 merkins is no joke.

    The next Thang would provide no escape from having to traverse long distances. (Sorry, Superfun(d)!)()( We slow moseyed (walked) to the stop sign over toward the bumper for a nice, long set of 11’s. We started in the grass there with 10 squats and then caricoa’ed the length of the parking lot (in the grass) to the other end and did 1 merkin before nurring (running backward) back to the start. Then, rinse and repeat with 9 squats and 2 merkins all the way to 1 squat and 10 merkins.
    As the reader may be picturing, the squats and merkins were very much the only chance to rest. That’s a long way to carioca and nur, and after just 1 or 2 rounds, each of the PAX silently vowed to never allow YHC to Q again. But, for the next 25 minutes there was no escape. So, the only thing left to do was embrace the suck, which these guys did admirably. Yankee Joe stayed with YHC the entire time, which was greatly appreciated. There’s nothing worse than being completely winded all by yourself. Thanks to YJ, YHC had no excuse to take breaks or slow up, and YJ even had enough in him to push YHC’s competition button at the end by nurring backward at top speed with total disregard for that pipe that was sticking up out of the ground. Also, T-claps to Superfun(d) who could’ve easily stopped a round early but refused to take the out.

    Slow moseyed back to the flag with a minute left, did some Freddy-Tana’s to get us to 6:15, and then COT and Superfun(d) prayed us out. Thanks for coming out on a Tuesday morning, fellas, and not wasting a beatdown! The pain and fatigue would be far less meaningful without you!

    SYTIG,
    Goose

  • 12…(13) Days of F3 Christmas – from Wiford Montana

    The pax coming off a strong performance at the peltch on saturday assembled for my 3rd que. This Monday was extra gloomy with fog and humidity rivaling that of mid July. 5:30 hit and we began with only what could be described as “hot garbage” of a cadence. Any confidence from que 2 was flushed like a goose post beatdown “thruster.” We had the usual stuff ending on a bumper mosey but I will be going back to the warm up tutorial video for my next que for sure.
    The Thang was the 12 days of F3 Christmas
    Day 1: lap around the stage track
    Day 2: burpees
    Day 3: merkins
    Day 4: Man Makers
    Day 5: Lunges
    Day 6: plank jacks
    Day 7: mountain climbers
    Day 8: crowd pleasing “thrusters”
    Day 9: LBCs
    Day 10: squats
    Day 11: SSH
    Day 12: Carolina Dry Docks

    After that 12th time around the track YHC can’t articulate what he felt but he knew no matter the faces the pax wanted……no, needed the Truth! Today gentleman is 13 days until Christmas, so alll thru the house not a creature was stirring when YHC announced day 13: BBS
    After that we had 2 minutes left so we got in 100 flutter kicks and Freddy’s till que failure. As I laid full extension on the ground looking up upon the sky, we counted off circle off and circle of Trust, YJ prayed us out
    #13days #thestage

  • ADVENTure Wreath – from Paradox

    The season of Advent has a special place in YHCs heart as a time of new family traditions and a much needed reminder of practices that prepare the way for Christ’s presence. YHC could think of no better way to honor this season than with life sized ADVENTure wreath and heavy coupon work. I knew just the HIMs that would take the journey with me. 5 pax rolled in ready for ADVENTure (ok ok I’ve used it twice , I’ll retire it ). The WiseMan Enron continued to have uncanny abilities to observe anything out of place and questioned the flickering candle stationed on our northern horizon. Goose rounded us out with gifts of gold, coupons, myhr and we’ll let’s just say his gloves did not smell of frankincense.

    Standard Warmup with some discussions on Goose genetic traits in all our exercises.

    Rifle Cary to Wreath (open field )
    Classic “Candle on a coupon “setup , check your field guides

    The Thang

    Clear your heart
    Prepare the way

    Cones were scattered about our wreath (4 coupons 25 yards apart in a square) and we needed to clean up before ADVENTuring (last one!, promise ) any further.
    Bearcrawl to a cone, 5 merkins, lunge walk back. Add 5 merkins each round. Many hands make light work and our wreath was sparkling clean in a few minutes.

    Rifle Carry to corner

    Hope candle- Prophecy Candle
    “Hope for Everyone “ Matt Maher (Advent of Christmas , great album)
    Hold coupon chest level w high knees
    Goblet sqat on “Hope “
    Quads got warm and we all Hoped it would end

    Look Up for hope
    Partner up for 100 OHP
    P1 Heels to Heaven
    10 OHP each round then flip flop

    Rifle carry to next cone

    Faith
    Bethlehem candle

    1st corner 1 blockee , 2 donkey kicks , rifle carry …2 Blockee then 4 donkey kicks and increase in that fashion till finishing at 10 DK and 5 blockee
    That was ….something

    Rifle carry to next corner

    Joy
    Sheperd Candle
    Leave the 99 , save the 1
    Start in circle holding plank
    Send 1 pax to the stage for step ups then send another pax to rescue . We did several ab exercises while taking turns rescuing the 1.Left Tana in charge during my rescue and shockingly no pickle pounders were performed. Thats called growth my friends.

    Rifle carry to next corner

    Love /Peace
    Angel candle
    “He Shall Reign Forevermore” Matt Maher (just to confirm, GREAT album)
    Coupon hops And Burpees on Reign
    Killer Rhythm Ronnie, we’ll have you on season 8 of Dancing with Financial Advisors very soon.

    Finished up at the Purity Candle
    With Team Mary
    Wife pleasers, LBCs, flutters
    YHC totally had a speech about it being the feast day of the immaculate conception planned. In my head preBlast it sounded like the hybrid of Mel Gibson Braveheart speech and the the “Win one for the Gipper speech”..But In real time YHCs brain was fried and it was like “hey Mary is awesome let’s do some abs”. It be like dat sometimes.

    Great effort across the board here men.

    COT and Post prayed us out

    Thanks for following me today
    Been a heart heavy month for YHC with some big decisions and obstacles abound . Grateful for you guys and the stability that God provides with our brotherhood.

    SYITG
    PDox
    ◦

  • St. Nick Didn’t Play Around – from Goose

    YHC had put together a St. Nicholas themed beatdown for this warm December 6 morning, but I wasn’t sure who, besides Enron, would show. But, sitting in the parking lot at 5:27, I wondered if even he would show and whether anyone would enjoy the feast. However, faithful to his word, Enron pulled in and YHC assumed it would be a two-man party like the old days, but then the red Superfun(d) mobile pulled in, and the Three Amigos went at it.

    After the Tana-city required to push through yesterday’s beatdown, YHC’s body and will were feeling depleted, but Q-drenaline and a solid theme to distract us provided just what the doctor ordered (from his trusty/pesky drug rep).

    Warmup were the usual suspects, most all the way to 20 reps to work through the stiffness, including high knees and butt kicks.

    The first Thang was preceded by an introduction to the true stories that made St. Nicholas so popular, the main one involving sneaking around town and throwing bags of gold coins into a needy person’s window. So, YHC though it best to start with a reverse 7 of Diamonds, which would include some sneaking through the dark of the early morn and dropping treasures.
    We started the first corner with all four exercises, and at each subsequent corner we dropped one of them (secretly) before sneaking to the next:
    Corner 1 (at the pole by the concrete): 28 OH claps, 21 squats, 14 merkins, 7 burpees, and then bear crawl stealthily down the field to the sidewalk
    Corner 2: 21 squats, 14 merkins, 7 burpees, and crab walk with Cardinal-esque smoothness, mostly, across to the other side of the field.
    Corner 3: 14 merkins, 7 burpees, and Groucho walk (which is sort of like cartoon sneaking) back to the concrete.
    Corner 4: 7 burpees and done with it.

    Thang 2 was a couple of songs about St. Nicholas, the first being “Jolly Old St. Nicholas” performed by Chet Atkins. The exercise was Al Gore for the duration, and turn-around (180) jump squats for every rhyme. YHC didn’t listen to the whole song in preparation, but if I had, I would’ve noticed that there are only four lines sung in the whole 2.5 minute song, so two rhymes total. Chet Atkins was a guitar player, so the song was pretty much a guitar solo interrupted by a couple of women singing a few lines of the classic song. The mostly uninterrupted Al Gore after that long Groucho walk was really something else. But, them boys didn’t complain, and we gladly gave our thighs a break for the next one.

    “St. Nicholas” by Anuna, a Celtic band, is an ancient song sung in Old English asking for St. Nicholas’s intercession for safe passage to Heaven. It only lasted for 1:13, so we held Mission Impossible plank for the duration and pushed up a merkin for every “Santa Nicholas”. The intensity of the music perfectly accented the manly grunts and heavy breathing.

    Then, it was up for a mosey toward Rich Man’s Loop, but we cut up past the townhomes (patio homes?) and did a burpee as we passed every front door, leaving generous gifts of sweat there on the ground for each family to find upon waking.

    Back at the Stage, we climbed to the chimney training ground, up on the stage at the bricks, to work on our form, strength, and dexterity. Started with dips for the gentle, butt first chimney drops (4-count x 15), then Left-leg bulgarian split squats for stepping into and out of the chimney (4-count x 10), Irkins for head first approaches (4-count x 15), Right-leg split squats (4-count x 10), and Derkins for full-on chimney dives (4-count x 15).

    Then, it was back down to the ground for 8 minutes of Mary to work on that famous gut, which may or may not have been a feature of the real St. Nick’s physique. Flutter kicks, penguins, heels to heaven, wife pleasers, J-Lo’s, pickle pounders (so scandalous, yet so effective), crunchy frogs, leg raises, and Freddys.

    COT, solid prayer by Enron, and then The Three Amigos powered out the ever-increasing ISI (sneaky difficulty, starting to really feel it, but grateful for what will soon be some ripped abs if we can lay off the carbs, which is unlikely).

    Thanks, fellas, for the brotherhood this morning!
    SYITG,
    Goose

  • Drug Rep Death March – from Wiford Montana

    Drug reps are an interesting bunch but none the less the drug rep themed que was requested so I felt I had to go for it. Full disclosure there are plenty of drug reps that need to tone it down as are with any profession (doctors included)
    The “usual” Montana warm up with all over the show cadence and timing. Still working on it but we also threw in some seal jacks with a splash of yankee joe sarcasm centered around my lexicon knowledge or lack of it.
    The bumper mosey was welcomed and then we had returned.
    The drug rep death March was here:
    1st round walk thru together so you compare it to your office jobs, friendly faces, water cooler convos, but after that you were on your own! Alone, just you and your hybrid setting out to clinic who probably doesn’t want to see you to talk about things they don’t want to hear. But this my friends is where the magic begins, you go anyway and hope each and every other drug rep believes that garbage and drives on, blows the horn and hits the gym. Today though men we MARCH!!!!!
    The start 10 BBS
    Station 1 : 10 merkins with bear crawl to next station
    Station 2: we’re not worthys, murder bunnies to next station
    Station 3: 10 curls/ overheads lung to final spot and then 10 lbs
    Highlight was the coffee runs called out at random to get the doctors coffee (run to bumper and do 10 jungle boys) T clap to Dox on sending Yankee back a second time cause he got the order wrong, you had one job joe. Also hilarious was cardinal noticing the typical drug rep/ doctor small talk making the patient wait lol . After the first run thru We repeated the track backwards until 6:09

    6 minutes of pot luck Mary:
    Dox called dolphin hops which turned out to be a crowd pleaser!

    Well done gentlemen and actually o do love my job and the awesome healthcare heros I get to meet everyday, but it is fun too laugh about it once and a while

    #the stage, #goose,#paradox,#yankeejoe, #lilCuz, #fencepost, #cardnal, #montana #2ndque

  • Sir Pax-A-Lot – from Yankee Joe

    The power sub-station is down. It could be hours before power is restored. It typically takes me three hours to write a back blast regardless of quality. My laptop has about an hour of battery life remaining. This will be the biggest challenge of my F3 career. Bring it.

    It is final exam week, and I am desperately treading water in an ocean of incompetent student essays, projects, and presentations. With every group presentation, I further doubt my own competence as an instructor. How did I fail them so completely? From this group of poor victims, comes interactions that make every painful moment worthwhile. I offer some real gems below:

    Presentation Q&A Example 1:

    – YHC: In what ways did Covid-19 impact the supply chain logistics within the automobile industry?

    – Student: Great question. To be honest, we can say that the supply chain was totes jacked up. In fact, I’m pretty sure the expression, “off the chain” came from this issue.

    – (YHC Internal Monologue): Well crap, it was indeed totes jacked up. I know this did not spawn the term, “off the chain”…right? I don’t even know what’s real anymore.
    —————–
    Presentation Q&A Example 2:

    – YHC: You mention that customers in China had trust issues with the company’s distribution channels?

    – Student: Totally. The products were all warehoused in the U.K.

    – YHC: Ok. What was the issue with products being warehoused in the U.K.?

    – Student: I mean, it’s a bunch of college students running the company?

    – (YHC Inner Monologue): Oh…oh no. No, no, no…She thinks that “UK” stands for University of Kentucky. Oh God…what do I do? Keep a straight face, keep a straight face. It’s too late for her. I can’t help. This is not the hill.

    – YHC: GO Wildcats!
    ——————
    Presentation Q&A Example 3 (and my absolute favorite so far):

    – YHC: You talk about the challenges of Starbucks entering the Indian market? Why was market entry so difficult?

    – Student: Well, it seems that they didn’t really have the right equipment and gear.

    – YHC: Explain

    – Student: Well, as you know, the northern border of India has the Himalayan Mountains, which make entering the country really hard.

    – YHC: (stares at student)

    Student: (stares at YHC)

    – YHC: (realize that student isn’t kidding)

    – Student: They’re really high mountains.

    – YHC: (long pause) Welp…sounds good to me! Moving on to the next question.
    ——————-
    What does all this have to do with a beatdown? Per usual, it is a very weak connection, but if I am good at anything, it’s forcing a square peg in a round hole. I use Backblasts for cathartic journaling as much as…well that’s it actually. Does anyone really read these things? If yes, post your favorite meme from The Office.

    7 Pax at the Stage. It’s been awesome as of late. The addition of Fence Post has raised the bar and the regs keep it consistent. Montana’s newly styled Sumo bun is looking on purnt! It was 43 degrees. As mentioned in prior blasts, YHC is not a tough guy when it comes to cold. The wind was blowing. I, with my tights and hooded sweatshirt felt very weak next to Enron in his shorts and short sleeves.
    —————-
    Warmarama
    – SSH – 30 ct until YHC felt some blood moving
    – Windmills that YHC thought were arm circles
    – Grass Grabbers w/ the Clap so YHC could feel like the NOLA PAX
    – Finally, real arm circles, but YHC forgot to call out the exercises
    – Some high knees, some Derricks…maybe (taken from the now famous Enron Re-VQ)
    – And a Mosie

    (now that I’m writing it down, it was pretty much the worst Warmarama since Montana)
    —————-
    ON to the Thangs…No real theme except that YHC misses IPC like the deserts miss the rain.

    The Beatdown: Sir Pax-A-Lot (three-part thang)

    AKA: 30-60’s – 20-40’s – 30-60’s (You’d get it if you had it goin’ like a turbo ‘Vette.)
    —————
    Set up:
    cones in a square of 20-yard sides. PAX moves starts at the lower left corner, then moves to the upper left corner, then diagonally to the lower right corner, then to the top right corner, finally diagonally to the lower left corner.
    ——————
    Round 1: 30 – 60 (transport – bear crawl)
    – 30 merkins
    – 60 arm raises
    – 30 Carolina dry docks
    – 60 seal jacks
    – 400 m run
    ———————-
    Round 2: 20 – 40 (transport – lunge walks)
    – 20 leg thrusters
    – 40 prisoner squats
    – 20 Bonnie Blair’s the hard way 2:1
    – 40 side to sides 1:1
    – 400 m run

    **the Bonnie B’s following the lunges, following the prisoner squats, following the leg thrusters suuuuuucked!
    ———————–
    Round 3: 30 – 60 (transport – crab walk)

    The subordina…er, I mean, chatter really picked up here. Goose had “so many questions” and Cardinal kindly reminded YHC that only 12 minutes remained. Montana announced 4:1 flutters equaled 120 (all by hisself too!). Enron questioned the exercise in general, forgetting the vendetta YHC had on he and Goose from a couple weeks ago…nobody can remember about what though.

    – 30 flutters 4:1
    – 60 low plank leg lifts 1:1
    – 30 Poppin Dollys (hello dolly followed by 90 degree leg lift)
    – 60 J-lo pickle gobblers 1:1 (J-Lo then two pickle pounders = 4 ct)
    – 400 m run

    ** I still can’t figure out how Cardinal so effortlessly glides through a crabwalk. YHC tried to keep up, which resulted in a muddy backside. I think he’s tired of hearing about it. Seriously, just let a playa’ play.
    ———————-
    Not Mary

    – We did something…whatevs…this ain’t even my whole day
    – Lastly, we did three level push-ups (up à quarter merkin hold, up à half merkin hold, up à full merkin hold; same thing down, BUT no hold at the bottom, which was a huge missed opportunity. That said, Enron was doing the wide arm mission impossible to hold the WHOLE DANG time at the bottom. I was very impressed…Enron was very pissed. My B.

    COT

    Goose prayed us out.

    Not my best work fellas, but I appreciate you powering through and raising the bar with every beatdown.

    Ooohh…the power just came on. Time to hear more inspiring presentations.

    SYITG,

    Yankee Joe

  • VQ Redo – from Enron

    Recently having to miss the last two reportedly epic beatdowns around Thanksgiving, including the highly contested Turkey bowl, YHC was ready to get back to action. Lately the Thibodaux PAX have had quite a few VQs including Wilford Montana, Goats in the Machine, and a report of an upcoming Lil’ Cuz VQ. YHC was reminiscing on his own first. In review of the laminated sheet (yes there was at least some prep), it was established that the new(er) PAX have been much more impressive in their creativity, preparation, understanding of timing of when exercises should be completed, understanding of generally how this should work, etc.… The thought blossomed to re-create the VQ for a replay to show how far we have come.
    Pulling up in the gloom to the empty parking lot at 5:25, the stage was set. As it turns out, YHCs original VQ ended up being a solo beatdown, meaning no one actually showed up. Therefore, the true VQ had to be rescheduled to a time where one other PAX was in attendance via an EH at 6:15 the morning of, on a brother-in-law, Headcheese. 6:30 rolled around and the stage remained empty of other attendees. Still confident of a late, and somewhat usual arrival of Goats, solo side straddle hops began the warmup. Just as these were completed, the headlights of not one, but two speeding minivans stormed on the scene. The minivan brigade barreled in the parking lot revealing Goats and Yankee Joe in perfect fashion to bring back memories of the VQ. After some mumble chatter on 2.0s and other reasons for the late arrival the explanation of what was coming began.
    YHC described the tale from his VQ and how in reading back through the beatdown and the realization of just how utterly stupid it was, it was perfect for a replay. The full intent of this was to demonstrate how impressive the recent VQ activities have been.
    PAX: Enron, Yankee Joe, Goats in the Machine

    Warmup:
    Abe Vigoda’s
    SSH (again for the late arrivals)
    Derrick’s – The stupidity of why these were ever placed into a warmup we will never know. Although, Yankee Joe seemed to enjoy the difficulty of them so early in the beatdown
    Nolan Ryans – Why would you put these in the warmup? You may ask. – because it’s a VQ and YHC didn’t know what he was doing
    Alarm Clocks – First on the Lexicon so naturally had to throw these in
    Bumper mosey

    Thang 1:
    “Yeah” by Joe Nicholls – played on only an iPhone, to bring back the simplicity of times before the infamous Thibodaux speaker debacle. JBL Proud®©™
    Plank for the duration
    Plank jack on “Yeah”
    Mountain climber on “She”

    Thang 2:
    The Cindy Crawford (for the perfect beach body)
    In each corner and then the middle of the stage, mosey between stations – 4 rounds of the following were completed:
    5- Merkins
    10- Moroccan Night clubs – why? You may ask – because it was a VQ and YHC didn’t know what they were
    15- Squats
    20- LBCs
    25- Calf Raises (or toe raises as they were strangely titled on the previously mentioned laminated page)

    Thang 3: Deck of Death
    It wouldn’t be an Enron Q without the DoD, although the VQ came before YHC had access to the F3 deck. Each PAX drew approximately 6-8 cards each from a regular deck of cards until it was 6:10
    Hearts: Merkins with face cards being hand release merkins
    Clubs: Squats with face cards being jump squats
    Diamonds: LBCs with face cards being Big boy sit-ups
    Spades: Burpees with face cards being SSHs
    Aces: bear crawl to end of field (30 yards) – mosey back

    Mary:
    Freddie Mercury’s
    Arm Circles – Why are we doing a warmup at the end? You may ask. Because it was a VQ and YHC didn’t know what he was doing
    Abe Vigoda- Why are we doing a warmup at the end? You may ask. Because it was a VQ and YHC didn’t know what he was doing
    Heals to Heaven
    Mountain Climbers

    COT and prayed us out. Thanks, guys, for the laughs to go along with this one, it was a nice way to ease back into it after the holiday.

  • Tabata Bout It – from Goose

    Still moping from having missed the Turkey Bowl on Saturday, YHC was looking forward to seeing the PAX this morning and hearing all the details. And, after hearing the details, it only made me more sorry that I missed it. But, camaraderie forged in pain was to be this morning’s gift, and the four PAX who attended were gracious enough to join YHC in the suffering.
    Warmups of the usual with some added hillbillies to burn up some soreness in the hips. Then we were off in and Indian Run around Rich Man’s Loop with the last person doing 5 Apolo Ohno’s before running to the front.
    Upon returning, YHC wasted no time in firing up the Tabata timer (I like the “Smart WOD” app) for 29 rounds of 40 seconds exercising and 20 seconds rest. Many were harder than YHC imagined, and some were a little easier (though not many). The chest was good and fried by the end of it, as were the calves. Background music was nixed in favor of space for mumblechatter, but it ended up being 29 straight minutes of panting and grunting and some jerk constantly telling us we were only halfway there. It was awesome. Here’s the list of exercises:
    1. Line jump w/2 feet (jump side to side over a line in the concrete)
    2. Left foot line jump (dang)
    3. Right foot line jump
    4. Irkins (on the bricks on the stage for this and the next few)
    5. Derkins
    6. Box jumps
    7. Dips
    8. Bonnie Blairs
    9. Big Boy Situps
    10. Calf raises
    11. Backward lunges
    12. Mountain climbers
    13. Merkins
    14. Werkins (wide arm merkins)
    15. Side lunges
    16. Freddy Mercurys
    17. LBC’s
    18. Flutter kicks
    19. Hairy Rockettes (straight leg up to opposite extended hand, to one side, then the other, like the Rockettes)
    20. Diamond merkins
    21. Pickle pounders (low plank, not high–that would be weird)
    22. Carioca (back and forth across the concrete)
    23. Elbow to opposite knee situps
    24. Rocky Balboas (on curb)
    25. Knerkins (merkins on knuckles, a.k.a Chuck Norris merkins)
    26. Plank jacks
    27. Toe taps (high plank, reach through and touch opposite toe)
    28. Crab cakes (opposite of above–crab position, reach up and touch opposite toe in turn)
    29. Carolina dry docks

    Finished at exactly 6:15 for some COT and some heavy prayer intentions for a lot of folks going through some major stuff.
    It was a blessing to be out there with you gents!
    SYITG,
    Goose