F3 New Orleans

Tag: The Hammer

  • Reindeer Games – from Russo

    Temperature was down to 37 this morning at the Gipper, which was not quite low enough for a winter wonderland (or sleeves for YHC), but cold enough for some reindeer games.

    As a kid, if you asked me what the best part of Christmas was, the easy answer was presents. From Legend of Zelda II: Adventures of Link to a Commodore 64 and its floppy disks, from Castle Grayskull to Optimus Prime, nothing beat the joy of ripping open wrapping paper, fumbling to tear apart boxes, and hoping you wouldn’t have to deal with the nightmare of shrink wrap. I got really, really good at feigning joy when clothes or books were the end result.

    As I got older, the best part of Christmas (besides the whole Jesus in a manger thing) moved from gifts to sleeping late because there was no school for two whole weeks, then to holiday parties, and then again to where it currently resides: eating. And more eating. And then eating some more.

    But because the gifts are a staple of the holidays, YHC was in a giving mood today, serving as the MC for a few rounds of Dirty Santa!

    Warmup (All IC, either 12x or 21x to honor today’s date as a palindrome – 12-22-21)
    – Seal jacks (not plank jacks)
    – SSH
    – Cherry pickers
    – Grass grabbers
    – Imperial walkers

    Thang
    Your basic Dirty Santa / White Elephant. The rules are simple:
    (1) Each HIM picks a number.
    (2) Number 1 picks a random gift/exercise from Santa’s bag (in this case, Santa was slumming it with a quart sized Ziploc) and performs said exercise while the other HIM perform the standard (e.g. merkins).
    (3) Number 2 has a choice: Number 1’s chosen exercise, the standard, or a new “gift”. If he chooses either of the first two options, the one who had their “gift” stolen can steal or select another mystery “gift”.
    (4) Around and around we go, until all HIM have a chance to select.

    The “gifts”:
    -10 merkins
    -20 jump squats
    -30 squats
    -8 Hand release merkins
    -20 hello dollies
    -20 leg lifts
    -30 monkey humpers
    -25 plank jacks
    -4 krakken burpees
    -8 SMCs
    -15 murder bunnies
    -20 bear crawls
    -10 diamond merkins
    -50 high knees
    -24 Apollo ohnos
    -15 scissor kicks
    -12 star jumps
    -20 freak nastys
    -1 burpee
    -2 calf raises
    -20 hip slappers
    -12 hallelujah squats
    -2 gas pumps
    -33 cherry pickers
    -6 donkey kicks

    Between rounds, Pax also moseyed around the courthouse and square to provide for some strategizing.

    A mosey back to home base, COT, name-o-rama, announcements and prayer closed us out.

    T claps to Fletch for also playing Santa and gifting us with his famous hot sauce.

    I don’t often have a chance to make the Gipper because of weekly commitments, so I appreciate you all joining me and letting me lead you all.

    One final note: I had an opportunity to watch The Chosen’s Christmas program, and the theme was “People must know”. People must know about the wonder of the Nativity, and who Jesus is, and how blessed we are with a Savior.

    My goal in the new year is to use that theme of “People must know”, not only regarding the gospel, but also about the benefits of F3. We all know them, and have been EH’ed at some point, and if you’re reading this, it stuck with you. I challenge us to continue the EHs, step out of our comfort zones, and spread the word.

    SYITG

  • 51 – from Akbar

    Another year in the books as YHC turned 51, joined by 8 HIM who woke up early Monday morning – some after Sunday’s Nightmare Before Christmas. The theme was 51 on paper, 5 sets, 5 exercises 10 reps each, with the last exercise being a 10 second hold. Sometimes paper doesn’t translate in reality so there were some modifications.

    Tunes accompanied courtesy of Grover’s Camp playlist.

    Rd 1: Block press, shoulder taps, squat press, Alpo’s, 10 count mid-way hold.

    Rd 2: Block row wide, block row narrow, supine row, renegade block row L, renegade block row R. 10 count hold.

    Rd 3: Merkin, chest press wide, chest press narrow, right arm single block press, left arm single block press, 10 count hold.

    Rd 4: Block curl wide, block curl narrow, forearm curl, left arm block curl, right arm clock curl ( the single arm curls did not happen). 10 count hold

    Rd 5: Diamond merkin, overhead block extension wide, overhead block extension narrow. 10 second hold.

    Mosey to the stop sign and back, circle up for Mary

    Squats x 20, Lunges x 20, LBC – leg raises, dolly x10

    Count, Name-o-rama, and YHC prayed us out with thoughts of focusing on unselfishness this week and thanks for accountability.

    Thanks for letting me lead, it’s always a blast.
    Akbar

  • 12 days of Christmas and a 12 theme – from BBQ

    12 days of Christmas song and exercise rotation. Assorted warmups. 12 each. My cadence still needs improvement. We did an exercise for each of the 12 days of Christmas and in rotation like the song. We ended up doing 144 HR Merkins, 264 squats, 360 LBC’s, 32 burpees, 80 arm circles, 84 jump squats, 48 leg kicks, 40 torso twists, 38 SSH’s, 30 mountain climbers, 22 crunchy frogs and 12 star jacks. We ended right on time and 0600. Namearma. Hammer prayed us out. His message was helping others at Christmas and all year round.

  • Inaugural Fire Fighter Challenge – from Bushwacker

    Since April 27 of this year YHC has been, for better or worse, persona non grata around the F3 northshore. I’ve done my best to show my face at least enough so that yous guys don’t forget what I look like. The Wacker of bushes has been on a journey to become a community servant as a Wacker of Fires. And thus, the long awaited, highly anticipated Fire Fighter Challenge has arrived!

    During academy, and from time to time on shift, we don our turnout gear – boots, pants jacket, hood, helmet, and mask – and go “on air” slinging a self-contained breathing apparatus and 4000 PSI air tank onto our backs – up to 80lbs! We then perform a series of strenuous activities which test our strength, stamina and endurance. And so it was with great preparation and only last minute planning that YHC brought to the men of the Lakefront a facsimile thereof as well as could be expected in the gloom. And, perhaps, a tradition was born?

    WARMORAMA

    In increasing reps starting with 12 (excepting for supersticious 13):
    SSH,
    High Knees
    Butt Kicks
    Cherry Pickers
    Windmills
    Fire Hydrants

    THANG

    We mossied to the gazebo for a few quick rounds of Merkin Waves and Squat Waves. This allowed for 2 things: QIC’s opportunity to count PAX for teams, and one of our resident byciclists, Turbo, to catch up to the crew.

    We then mossied to the shaft where, thanks to help from early birds Steve, Shooter, and Waterpik, the field was set! Breaking up into teams of appx. 3 the PAX lined up, each at a station including the Tire Toss, the Ax Chop, the Tire Flip, the Tire Drag, the Tire Pull, and Moby Chain Drag. While P1 was tackling the task, P2 & P3 was doing a specified exercise, including LBCs, Flutter Kicks, Mnt Climbers, High Knees, Leg Lifts and Gas Pumpers.Somewhere along the way, Waterpick split the massive log, and in a temper tantrum over having not been he who split the mighty oak, the lugubrious Shooter shattered the hickory handle of the ax! There was continuous conversation as men of all ages and capabilities gave it their all battling amongst a sea of black rubber with shimmerings of silver links, all covered in the grassy morning dew. After a couple of rounds, proving to edict that many a hands make light a work, the PAX loaded all the coupons back on the trailer from whence it came, and back to the flag we mosied.

    MARY

    With 3 minutes to spare, it was on your 6 for 20 Putins IC, 20 Flutter Kicks IC, and 100 100s OYO.

    COT

    Count and name-o-rama before naming FNG Dangerfield. Turbo prayed us out. (and Cowbell made it just in time for “Amen”)

    Gentlemen, it was a pleasure that I’ve missed, being back in the main event, and I want to thank ll of you for making F3 Northshore what it is, and allowing me the humble honor of leading you bunch of yahoos through a taste of a new chapter of my life.

    SYITG

  • Black Friday Shopping – from Jose10k

    ‘‘Twas the day after Thanksgiving and all through the house, not a creature was ….not entirely true, I was up, moving slow because I consumed way to much thanksgiving day food. But it was Black Friday, and the beat down needed a theme for such an occasion. I couldn’t disappoint the whacker of bushes, so I created a workout that mirrored the Black Friday,
    Warmups: ssh, windmills, grassgrabbers , self love , torso twists
    The thang: you can’t go shopping without coupons, so yhc brought some. He set the up in a line so as my customers were waiting to check out, they each had to perform an exercise . 1. Man makers 2. Altos. 3. Curls. 4. Windshield wipers. 5. Overhead presses. 6. Squat Thrusts. 7. Rows with two 30 pound dumbbells. Each customer exercises while one shopper bear crawls the width of the parking lot, back pedals halfway up the length of the garage, sprints the rest, bear crawls again, back pedals, and sprints. Upon returning to the line, everyone moves up a spot in line. Kept going until everyone went through once, completed 3 extra shoppers. The group helped turn in their coupons, finished off with leg raises until my nephew had to stop twice. He smoked me at the turkey trot, I had to beat him in something. Cot, hammer prayed us out with great words of thanks and appreciation. And we had an FNG… welcome Chaps.
    Thanks for allowing me to lead my brothers. SYITG

  • A Bonnie Blair By Any Other Name Still Sucks – from Zoolander

    I know it says Zoolander was the Q for this one, but that’s only because YHC’s name isn’t on the dropdown menu yet. And, it was ultimately Zoo’s idea to get the fellas from down the bayou to Q a November Lakefront beatdown, and we couldn’t be more grateful!

    YHC showed up in the Goosemobile with four men and two boys who’ve been looking forward to this for weeks. It’s become very clear to me over the years that God has wired men in such a way that the more we suffer together, the more we come to care deeply about each other’s well being, regardless of differences in background, lifestyle, (number of kids), etc. So, it was easy to jump at the opportunity to travel north and lead a beatdown out of gratitude for the men who have allowed me to suffer with them and who first shared the gift of F3 with me. Now, the cycle is continuing down in Thibodaux with a growing PAX!

    Disclaimer was stated for the benefit of an FNG (Welcome, Crock Pot!). Warmups consisted of IC: SSH, Windmills, Imperial Walkers, Arm Circles, Cherry Pickers, Self Love, High Knees, and Butt Kicks, followed by a mosey to Noah’s Ark.

    YHC revealed an F3 Workout Deck, and three cards were pulled and listed exercises completed with a promise of more random suffering to come. This was followed by partner BLIMPS, but with a bit of a twist. Grundy’s late arrival provided an opportunity to reminisce back to YHC’s first beatown, whcih was Q’d by Grundy. It included Sister Mary Catherine’s in the warmup, which totally burned out my legs before we even got to Noah’s Ark. A fitting memory to share before introducing these BLIMPS:

    Thang 1:
    Partner 1 ran around Noah’s Ark, while Partner 2 huffed and puffed his way through their shared total of:
    50 Bonnie Blairs (another name for SMC’s),
    50 Lunge Jumps (another name for SMC’s),
    50 Iron Mikes (another name for SMC’s),
    50 Merkins,
    50 Plank Jacks,
    50 Sister Mary Catherine’s (SMC’s)

    Thang 2:
    Moseyed once again, stopping to complete exercises from three more cards from the deck, then lining up along the wall for two version of a newly minted “Indian Inchworm Wall Crawl”. The first version consisted of all PAX in dip position on the wall moving to the right and completing a dip with every “step” while the man in the rear of the line crab walked to the front. After a number of traffic jams and Bushwacker grumbles, the last of the PAX had crabbed their way to the front, so it was time to turn around and go the other way. Pax assumed the irkin position on the wall and moved to the right, completing an irkin with every “step”. The rearmost PAX bear crawled their way to the front of the line this time, so things moved a little more quickly.

    Thang 3:
    Another short mosey brought us to a grassy area big enough for the highly anticipated Tunnel of Love. Ironically, Zoolander had just shared his gratitude that YHC hadn’t included this exercise since it was a memorable highlight from my VQ a few years back. So, it was with a special joy that I announced that all PAX would be snuggling up shoulder to shoulder in plank position while the rearmost PAX in the line army crawled through Tunnel of Love. Bushwacker’s encouraging “love whacks” kept the line moving while the plankers’ shoulders burned and threatened to give out.

    Hope then rose in the hearts of many as we lined up for what would be a wildly chaotic Indian run back to the flag with many PAX digging deep, knowing that this would ultimately be the last time they’d have to push. But, YHC knew what lurked amongst the cards in the deck, and after two relatively harmless pulls to fill the small amount of time left before 7:30, a third and final pull was offered to the FNG. It was the new guy, at 7:29, who managed to pull the 400 meter sprint card, arguably the worst card in the deck. So, despite the shared astonishment and disbelief, the beatdown ended with 25 men sprinting toward an inhabited car and then back to the flag, all residual energy and will to live good and drained.

    COT, announcements, and prayer by Enron of F3 Thibodaux.

    Coffeeteria offered time to catch up and enjoy the beautiful weather before the long ride home to Thibodaux. All PAX in the Goosemobile shared their gratitude for the opportunity to experience F3 on that level and for the men who were willing to suffer with us as we continue to strive to get better at doing hard things. It was a great gift to get to spend such high quality time with you guys this morning, and I very much look forward to seeing you in the gloom (wherever that gloom might be)!

  • Face cards prevail, unfortunately not at the Casino.. – from Shooter

    7 PAX and a visitor to close at COT graced the YHC this Gloom for some card work..The face cards were a plenty, if only that could happen at the Blackjack table..

    Warmup
    15IC Toe Touches, Hillbillies, SSH, Air presses, Cherry pickers, Imperial walkers and Butt kicks..

    Thang
    Moseyed through Mandeville utilizing 2 bus stops, OLL overflow parking area and the corridor of Granny’s..
    Each stop instructions given for each suit with called exercises. First stop included jump stairs, freak nasties, Derkins and jump ups. Second stop sprints, calf raises, alternating merkins and American hammers. Third stop jump overs, Irkins, little Manny crunches and step ups. Returned to AO for the finale including Diamond Merkins, Burpees, Flutter kicks and a Joker at which YHC offered a called exercise of 25 LBCs by Hammer..

    Count, namorama, and COT with Wacker slipping in with flag and walkie-talkie in tow..

    Appreciate the post gentlemen and until the next Gloom 👊🏼💪🏼✌🏼!!!

  • Day of remembrance – from Shooter

    6 PAX converge on this Veterans Day to get some before the daylight breaks the horizon..
    Brief warmup all to 11 SSH, Toe Touches, Butt kicks, Windmills, Squats and Merkins..

    Different route through Mandeville stopping along the way for reps of 11 Merkins, Squats, Crunchy frogs, Burpees..

    Returned back to use the barricades at the Scramble for curls, presses and shrugs…

    Appreciate you men posting and allowing me to lead!!

    Till the next Gloom 👊🏼👍🏼✌🏼!!!

  • Fall Back – from Steve

    Talk about a dark warmorama. About the only definable figure I could make out was, well nobody, really, since Shooter wasn’t there. Of course I knew Jose was present from the early morning grumbling, but the rest of the crew were shrouded in mystery. Given such circumstances, YHC delivered a clear disclaimer in case there were any FNGs (turned out there were two), and we got things rolling.

    Started off with the usual – good mornings, windmills, torso twists, arm circles, IW’s, Hillbillies, SSHs, High Knees – mostly at 10x IC, but a 15 and a 30 crept in there. I like to say those instances are “to keep the pax on their toes,” but of course the pax is smarter than that – they know it’s just early morning brain fog.

    We hadn’t moseyed to the playground in a while, so that was on the menu today, stopping at each intersection for a set of 10x deconstructed burpees. Zoolander’s No-Booze-November had hit a snag the night before (a snag by the name of Woodford Reserve), and so my originally planned set of x20 burpees seemed cruel as he had, not but 5 minutes before this point, requested “no burpees, please.” So we deconstructed instead, which would mean 10x squats, 10x groiners, 10x merkins, and 10x jump squats. Knocked those out at the three intersections and then hit a fourth one when we reached the playground.

    Then it was time for one of my lakefront standards, a partner routine where P1 wall sits and performs overhead air presses while P2 hits three stations: 10 t-merkins, 10 jump squats, 10 big boys. Three rounds of that and it was on to neighboring grass patch for a few games.

    That’s right, games. Let it not be said (Toto) that I do not include any fun in my beatdowns! First up was a game called When Animals Attack, which features one pax (it) bear crawling to tag any of the other guys, who are all crab walking. Any one who is tagged then performs 5 burpees and immediately joins in as a bear, to help tag the rest of the crew. I had initially envisioned a rabid, growling Tanked Up tearing through that patch of grass, but alas, when the sun finally rose this morning and it was clear who was standing before me, there was no Tank to be found. Grundy was the next best choice, so he became the first bear. Now, whoever invented this game clearly did not know the Northshore region’s distaste for crab walking because when the game finally began, the crabs all just sat in place waiting to be tagged. Some even moved closer to the bear! It seemed unanimous – the guys would rather do their 5 burpees and half-heartedly attempt to tag others than crab walk five steps. The next round was hardly better than the first, with Zoolander and his stomach of steel as the bear, and so we moved on to another game: Duck Jousting.

    To say duck jousting was more successful might be a stretch, but it was certainly more entertaining. In this game, it’s every man for himself. You get in a low duck walk position with your arms across your chest, and hobble over to the nearest pax to try and topple him without the use of your hands. Once you’ve been knocked over, you start high kneeing until the game ends.

    Though this was totally a Mathlete type of game, a surprise attack by Zoolander knocked him out early on. It came down to Jose, Swole, and Zoo. Swole attempted a Switzerland type of strategy, where he simply sat (or squatted) off to the side and awaited the victor between Jose and Zoo. But this proved faulty when Zoo took him down by surprise. By this point, our two gladiators had entirely abandoned the rule of duck walking (well, let’s be fair, Zoolander was never actually duck walking from the start). Even with an assist from Bird, Zoo was unable to take down Jose, but one final assault sent both men to the ground in a tie.

    Time to head back, so we formed two lines and Bataan Death Marched back to the flag. Once back, we did some single leg squats to the sea wall while Turbo graciously picked up the six. Quick Mary and time for COT. Welcome FNG’s Slater and Woody, and t-claps for hanging in there. Hope to see you guys back out soon. (And a personal thanks to our FNG’s for forcing me to write a backblast after months of negligence.) Hammer prayed us out and off to Book and the Bean for coffeteria. Appreciate the opportunity to lead you men, SYITG.

  • Another Cakewalk – from Russo

    Hurricane Ida wrecked a lot of plans this year. She did a lot of damage, broke a lot of hearts, made life a ton more difficult. But one thing I’ve learned is that even in the darkest of hours, God can find a way to turn something terrible into something good.

    I don’t want to belittle the struggle our region is still dealing with, and I can tell you firsthand there is a lot of work left. But I can also tell you firsthand that God has given us an opportunity to grow together, help each other, and all in all, be better people.

    My original plan for the first week in September was to do a birthday Q, and following the lead of Grundy and/or Zoolander (depending on how good an idea it was), complete another “Cake walk” and hope it catches on as a thing.

    Well, those plans changed due to Mother Nature, but God’s timing is perfect, so a pax of 17 said “Take Two” under beautiful weather with low humidity and temps topping out at around 71.

    Warmup (between 10x and 20x, all IC)
    Seal jacks
    Toe touches
    Arm circles
    Torso twists
    Goofballs

    Thang: A cakewalk, your basic descending ladder of exercises and reps, starting at YHC’s age (in this case, 43), and work your way to 1, with some moseying in between around Old Mandeville/Lakefront.

    The order:

    43 High knees
    42 SSHs
    41 Plank Jacks
    40 merkins (where Bird started to wonder where the burpees were)
    39 squats
    38 Hello Dollies
    37 Calf raises
    36 Apollo ohnos
    35 Freak Nastys
    34 step ups
    33 flutter kicks
    32 butt kicks (2 is 1) (lead IC by the entire pax rotating, very nice job, gents!)
    31 Peter Parker’s (2 is 1)
    30 imperial walkers
    29 Shoulder taps (2 is 1)
    28 American hammers
    27 George thoroughgood
    26 Smurf jacks
    25 leg raises
    24 Rosalitas
    23 crab jacks (crab position – opposite plank jacks)
    22 groiners
    21 Bear crawls
    20 murder bunnies
    19 Hand release merkins
    18 Bobby Hurley’s
    17 crab cakes (2 is 1)
    16 circle ups
    15 Bulgarian split squats
    14 durkins
    13 big boy sit-ups
    12 LMCs
    11 diamond merkins
    10 star jumps
    9 donkey kicks
    8 8 count body builders
    7 makhtar n’jais
    6 6 inch drills (where Zoolander was wise to my plan)
    5 Carolina dry docks
    4 Bonnie Blair’s
    3 jump squats
    2 burpees (here they are Bird!)
    1 minute plank

    COT, name-o-rama, announcements, and prayer closed us out.

    This Q doubled as my 3 year anniversary Q, so it’s time for me to again thank Toto for EH’ing me. Like I suspect has happened to many of us, I had no idea what I was in for. I showed up late to my first beatdown (Splice was Q) and quickly wondered what I got myself into. Manny’s words to me were “just stick with it” and he was right.

    More than once, I was the 6. I’m still the 6 on occasion. But each and every time, someone is there to pick me (or you) up. Tanked up was the first I remember. Shooter seems to do it the most (especially on moseys).

    And that’s what makes this group of men so darn solid. What started out as “I could use the exercise” or “I want to get back in shape” quickly turns to something more.

    The F for Fitness is lowercase. The other two are uppercase. I’ve enjoyed laughing with you all, especially when Hammer gets a pax going with his 80’s references, or Zoolander makes an off color joke about doing a Freddy Mercury. You each have enriched me, made me a better person, lended guidance, and just in general have been a blast to be around.

    Before I started, I didn’t have a lower back that constantly aches or stiffens up, nor did I have a left shoulder that tells me “That’s enough merkins for today.” I didn’t even know I had an Achilles’ tendon.

    But it has all been worth it. Ever nagging pain and shortness of breath: worth it knowing I’m making a decision to better myself as a leader, a Christian, a productive member of society. And that’s due to each of you, whether I called you by name above or not. Because finally, after 3 years, I think I’ve learned your real names, which is maybe a bigger compliment.