F3 New Orleans

Tag: Steve

  • No Bricks Were Harmed During This Beatdown – from Steve

    Pax of 8 over at Granny’s yesterday morning, including a new face , Pass Interference. This guy Q’d his farewell Q on Thursday in Atlanta only to then move down to Pearl River over the weekend and post at Granny’s on Tuesday? Huh. Impressive. Also impressive are Granny’s numbers lately. It’s hard to say exactly, what with the lack of backblasts and all (I don’t wanna hear it, Akbar!), but YHC would say it’s been 7 pax or more for over two months. What caused this sudden resurgence? Russo’s number-themed beatdowns? Or maybe Zoolander’s continued efforts to grow the pax finally paying off? Or maybe it’s Granny’s recent facelift? (She’s all dolled up with Christmas lights these days and has a new splashpad – which feels like two years in the making and hardly looks different.) Who knows, but regardless, it’s great having a bigger group out there.

    Anyhow. The beatdown.

    Warmorama: SSH, good mornings, IWs, hillbillies, arm circles, windmills, seal jacks, 10x IC. Usually I stretch this out in anticipation of a Cowbell – arriving in Cowbell time – but no need to today. He clipped the curb coming in five minutes EARLY.

    Thang:
    Started off making the block, stopping twice to do 10x kraken burpees.

    Then onto an incredibly well-organized circuit including “shit brick sliders,” which a visiting pax (from Birmingham?) brought down to us a few years back. The man on the sliders would be a timer, taking two bricks and sliding them down the trace in a bear crawl-like position until he made it through the tunnel of lights. Run the bricks back, and the everyone rotates. Clockwise. Or counter clockwise. Doesn’t matter, Akbar is gonna do what Akbar wants to do when it’s this early in the morning. The other stations might have been:

    Lunges
    Leg raises
    Merkins
    Freak Nasties
    Situps
    Jump squats
    Suicides

    Unbelievably, the bricks survived (Pik took it easy this morning). But we did leave some red chalky streaks down the trace that give a little horror vibe to all of the otherwise festive decorations at the trailhead. Anyway, after everyone got a taste with the bricks, we Lt Dan-ned our way down the trace until we reached the bus depot, where we stopped for one final set of 10x kraken burpees.

    Two minutes to spare for a rapid fire set of leg raises, dollies, rosalitas, lbcs, and freddies.

    COT where we informed Pass Interference of the upcoming Braveheart screening, Mathlete Q, and Nightmare Before Christmas. Pik prayed us out. Thank you men for the post and the push, it’s always a pleasure.

  • Inaugural Fire Fighter Challenge – from Bushwacker

    Since April 27 of this year YHC has been, for better or worse, persona non grata around the F3 northshore. I’ve done my best to show my face at least enough so that yous guys don’t forget what I look like. The Wacker of bushes has been on a journey to become a community servant as a Wacker of Fires. And thus, the long awaited, highly anticipated Fire Fighter Challenge has arrived!

    During academy, and from time to time on shift, we don our turnout gear – boots, pants jacket, hood, helmet, and mask – and go “on air” slinging a self-contained breathing apparatus and 4000 PSI air tank onto our backs – up to 80lbs! We then perform a series of strenuous activities which test our strength, stamina and endurance. And so it was with great preparation and only last minute planning that YHC brought to the men of the Lakefront a facsimile thereof as well as could be expected in the gloom. And, perhaps, a tradition was born?

    WARMORAMA

    In increasing reps starting with 12 (excepting for supersticious 13):
    SSH,
    High Knees
    Butt Kicks
    Cherry Pickers
    Windmills
    Fire Hydrants

    THANG

    We mossied to the gazebo for a few quick rounds of Merkin Waves and Squat Waves. This allowed for 2 things: QIC’s opportunity to count PAX for teams, and one of our resident byciclists, Turbo, to catch up to the crew.

    We then mossied to the shaft where, thanks to help from early birds Steve, Shooter, and Waterpik, the field was set! Breaking up into teams of appx. 3 the PAX lined up, each at a station including the Tire Toss, the Ax Chop, the Tire Flip, the Tire Drag, the Tire Pull, and Moby Chain Drag. While P1 was tackling the task, P2 & P3 was doing a specified exercise, including LBCs, Flutter Kicks, Mnt Climbers, High Knees, Leg Lifts and Gas Pumpers.Somewhere along the way, Waterpick split the massive log, and in a temper tantrum over having not been he who split the mighty oak, the lugubrious Shooter shattered the hickory handle of the ax! There was continuous conversation as men of all ages and capabilities gave it their all battling amongst a sea of black rubber with shimmerings of silver links, all covered in the grassy morning dew. After a couple of rounds, proving to edict that many a hands make light a work, the PAX loaded all the coupons back on the trailer from whence it came, and back to the flag we mosied.

    MARY

    With 3 minutes to spare, it was on your 6 for 20 Putins IC, 20 Flutter Kicks IC, and 100 100s OYO.

    COT

    Count and name-o-rama before naming FNG Dangerfield. Turbo prayed us out. (and Cowbell made it just in time for “Amen”)

    Gentlemen, it was a pleasure that I’ve missed, being back in the main event, and I want to thank ll of you for making F3 Northshore what it is, and allowing me the humble honor of leading you bunch of yahoos through a taste of a new chapter of my life.

    SYITG

  • Nothing but THANKS – from Russo

    YHC is a big fan of finding little things to be thankful for every day. Something new or different. Something unexpected. Something unique. Anything to keep me plugged into how blessed we are.

    Blessings like a bathroom at Grandma’s house. Like a cool, crisp 43 degree morning. Like lunch dates with potential love interests. Like 7 HIM sharing a common experience and making themselves better. Like Zoolander’s encyclopedic knowledge of early-to-mid 90s Halloween and witchcraft movies.

    Giving thanks was the name of the game today at granny’s.

    Warmup (all 10 to 20 IC)
    – Seal jacks
    – Grass grabbers
    – Torso twists
    – Imperial walkers
    – Arm circles
    – Cherry pickers

    Thang

    Mosey around the lakefront, where we stopped intermittently to give THANKS: each exercise starting with the proper letter. T claps to Cowbell for picking up on the pattern quickest (I think).

    T. T merkins (10)
    H. Hallelujah squats (15)
    A. Apollo ohno’s (10: 2 is 1)
    N. Not-so-lazy boys (10)
    K. Knuckle merkins (10)
    S. SMC’s (10)

    T. Traveler merkins (10 in a clockwise pattern)
    H. Hip slappers (20: 1 is 1)
    A. American Hammers (25: 2 is1)
    N. Freak Nastys (15)
    K. Kraken Burpee (5) – T claps to Steve for correctly guessing what was coming.
    S. Step ups (20: 1 is 1)

    T. Twinkle toes (20: 2 is 1)
    H. Hand release merkins (10)
    A. Alligator merkins (10)
    N. Nutcrackers (10 IC)
    K. Knuckle merkins (10) – Respect to JV and Slots (and maybe others) knocking them out on the concrete without gloves
    S. Scissor kicks (20: 2 is 1) – or maybe it was flutter kicks, I can’t keep them straight.

    The mosey back ended with one minute to spare, so Pax planked until the clock hit 0.

    COT, Name-o-Rama, announcements, and prayer closed us out.

    Here’s where I give thanks, not only this week, but every day for this group of (and all) HIM. Getting up before 5 to push harder with the vague goal of making ourselves better, however we want to define it, is never an easy decision, but it’s often the right one. I hope we continue to be able to take some time to give thanks for what God has blessed us with.

    Like breath in our lungs to do Hallelujah squats in a circle in the middle of Girod street, like a cult worship, without getting hauled away to jail to “sleep it off.”

    SYITG

  • A Bonnie Blair By Any Other Name Still Sucks – from Zoolander

    I know it says Zoolander was the Q for this one, but that’s only because YHC’s name isn’t on the dropdown menu yet. And, it was ultimately Zoo’s idea to get the fellas from down the bayou to Q a November Lakefront beatdown, and we couldn’t be more grateful!

    YHC showed up in the Goosemobile with four men and two boys who’ve been looking forward to this for weeks. It’s become very clear to me over the years that God has wired men in such a way that the more we suffer together, the more we come to care deeply about each other’s well being, regardless of differences in background, lifestyle, (number of kids), etc. So, it was easy to jump at the opportunity to travel north and lead a beatdown out of gratitude for the men who have allowed me to suffer with them and who first shared the gift of F3 with me. Now, the cycle is continuing down in Thibodaux with a growing PAX!

    Disclaimer was stated for the benefit of an FNG (Welcome, Crock Pot!). Warmups consisted of IC: SSH, Windmills, Imperial Walkers, Arm Circles, Cherry Pickers, Self Love, High Knees, and Butt Kicks, followed by a mosey to Noah’s Ark.

    YHC revealed an F3 Workout Deck, and three cards were pulled and listed exercises completed with a promise of more random suffering to come. This was followed by partner BLIMPS, but with a bit of a twist. Grundy’s late arrival provided an opportunity to reminisce back to YHC’s first beatown, whcih was Q’d by Grundy. It included Sister Mary Catherine’s in the warmup, which totally burned out my legs before we even got to Noah’s Ark. A fitting memory to share before introducing these BLIMPS:

    Thang 1:
    Partner 1 ran around Noah’s Ark, while Partner 2 huffed and puffed his way through their shared total of:
    50 Bonnie Blairs (another name for SMC’s),
    50 Lunge Jumps (another name for SMC’s),
    50 Iron Mikes (another name for SMC’s),
    50 Merkins,
    50 Plank Jacks,
    50 Sister Mary Catherine’s (SMC’s)

    Thang 2:
    Moseyed once again, stopping to complete exercises from three more cards from the deck, then lining up along the wall for two version of a newly minted “Indian Inchworm Wall Crawl”. The first version consisted of all PAX in dip position on the wall moving to the right and completing a dip with every “step” while the man in the rear of the line crab walked to the front. After a number of traffic jams and Bushwacker grumbles, the last of the PAX had crabbed their way to the front, so it was time to turn around and go the other way. Pax assumed the irkin position on the wall and moved to the right, completing an irkin with every “step”. The rearmost PAX bear crawled their way to the front of the line this time, so things moved a little more quickly.

    Thang 3:
    Another short mosey brought us to a grassy area big enough for the highly anticipated Tunnel of Love. Ironically, Zoolander had just shared his gratitude that YHC hadn’t included this exercise since it was a memorable highlight from my VQ a few years back. So, it was with a special joy that I announced that all PAX would be snuggling up shoulder to shoulder in plank position while the rearmost PAX in the line army crawled through Tunnel of Love. Bushwacker’s encouraging “love whacks” kept the line moving while the plankers’ shoulders burned and threatened to give out.

    Hope then rose in the hearts of many as we lined up for what would be a wildly chaotic Indian run back to the flag with many PAX digging deep, knowing that this would ultimately be the last time they’d have to push. But, YHC knew what lurked amongst the cards in the deck, and after two relatively harmless pulls to fill the small amount of time left before 7:30, a third and final pull was offered to the FNG. It was the new guy, at 7:29, who managed to pull the 400 meter sprint card, arguably the worst card in the deck. So, despite the shared astonishment and disbelief, the beatdown ended with 25 men sprinting toward an inhabited car and then back to the flag, all residual energy and will to live good and drained.

    COT, announcements, and prayer by Enron of F3 Thibodaux.

    Coffeeteria offered time to catch up and enjoy the beautiful weather before the long ride home to Thibodaux. All PAX in the Goosemobile shared their gratitude for the opportunity to experience F3 on that level and for the men who were willing to suffer with us as we continue to strive to get better at doing hard things. It was a great gift to get to spend such high quality time with you guys this morning, and I very much look forward to seeing you in the gloom (wherever that gloom might be)!

  • The Walls of (Chris) Jericho – from Steve

    Simple beatdown at the Marsh this past Monday, the ol’ Walls of Jericho. But these were not the insurmountable, Grundyesque walls of old (which featured bear crawls halfway up the Gipper garage, sprints, and other such nonsense). No, we opted for much shorter walls – Steve-size walls. And good thing, too, we didn’t want to scare away the FNG that JV brought out.

    Warmorama: IW’s, windmills, seal jacks, arm circles, cherry pickers, butt kicks, all around 15x IC.

    Then a short mosey over to the Treen Center to get cracking on those walls. Seven reps of seven exercises, followed by a lap around the building. Seven times. The exercises were:

    7 burpees
    7 sit-ups
    7 jump squats
    7 t merkins
    7 leg raises
    7 smks
    7 wide arm merkins

    Finished all 7 rounds and headed back to the court for one final set of each (OCD kicked in and I couldn’t leave the final count at 49 for each of these, had to bump it up to 50).

    COT and naming of our FNG, which was maybe the most painful naming in memory. But welcome, nonetheless, Wrestlemania™! It was great to have a new face out at the Marsh and we look forward to seeing you Saturday. And t-claps to JV for the EH. Thank you men for posting and getting me out there, it always feels good to start the week at the Marsh with you guys.

  • Face cards prevail, unfortunately not at the Casino.. – from Shooter

    7 PAX and a visitor to close at COT graced the YHC this Gloom for some card work..The face cards were a plenty, if only that could happen at the Blackjack table..

    Warmup
    15IC Toe Touches, Hillbillies, SSH, Air presses, Cherry pickers, Imperial walkers and Butt kicks..

    Thang
    Moseyed through Mandeville utilizing 2 bus stops, OLL overflow parking area and the corridor of Granny’s..
    Each stop instructions given for each suit with called exercises. First stop included jump stairs, freak nasties, Derkins and jump ups. Second stop sprints, calf raises, alternating merkins and American hammers. Third stop jump overs, Irkins, little Manny crunches and step ups. Returned to AO for the finale including Diamond Merkins, Burpees, Flutter kicks and a Joker at which YHC offered a called exercise of 25 LBCs by Hammer..

    Count, namorama, and COT with Wacker slipping in with flag and walkie-talkie in tow..

    Appreciate the post gentlemen and until the next Gloom 👊🏼💪🏼✌🏼!!!

  • Day of remembrance – from Shooter

    6 PAX converge on this Veterans Day to get some before the daylight breaks the horizon..
    Brief warmup all to 11 SSH, Toe Touches, Butt kicks, Windmills, Squats and Merkins..

    Different route through Mandeville stopping along the way for reps of 11 Merkins, Squats, Crunchy frogs, Burpees..

    Returned back to use the barricades at the Scramble for curls, presses and shrugs…

    Appreciate you men posting and allowing me to lead!!

    Till the next Gloom 👊🏼👍🏼✌🏼!!!

  • These go to 11…or 9…or 11 – from Russo

    A brisk temperature of 48 degrees (still not cold enough for sleeves) and a clear sky greeted a pax of 5 this morning for an organized, balanced, and repetitive beatdown that of course incorporated number patterns because that is how YHC maintains a small measure of control in an otherwise chaotic world.

    Warmup (believed to be all IC, 10x, but that’s difficult to confirm when Bushwhacker gets to talking about rookie hazing and toilet scrubbing at the firehouse)

    – Grass grabbers
    – Torso twists
    – Cherry pickers
    – Toe touches
    – Arm circles
    – Good mornings

    Thang before the Thang

    A two block mosey down Girod to the Rusty P and their outside benches to get us started, where YHC wondered how long it would take before someone figured out the secret repetition code. Answer: not long, even in the early morning hours, not with a sharp as a tack Chewy on the case.

    11 step ups were followed by 9 freak nastys, then 9 step ups followed by 11 freak nastys.

    The gig was up, but the question remained: Why 9 and 11? Despite thoughts of September 11, January 19th, calling 9-1-1 hoping Bushwhacker makes house calls, and something or other about 91, the clue of today’s date finally allowed YHC to see the bright light bulbs going off among the Pax: November 9, which is either brilliant or incredibly lazy in its simplicity. It was probably the latter.

    As we moseyed closer to Granny’s (with either 9 or 11 diamond merkins, jump squats, big boy sit-ups interspersed) the pax was briefly stopped by some “traffic”. Prayers up to that mailbox.

    Pax made it to the bus stop, where the sequence was 11 Bulgarian split squats, 9 durkins, 9 BSSs, and 11 durkins before a short mosey to begin the Thang:

    With only 2 minutes or 25 minutes left (depending on whether you were using Bushwacker’s timekeeping or YHC’s), we worked 6 rounds of alternating reps of 11 and 9 at each column, followed by a trip up and back down the pilot house:

    – 11 SSH and 9 squats
    – 11 seal jacks 9 merkins
    – 11 high knees 9 LBCs
    – 11 Apollo Ohnos 9 plank jacks
    – 11 mummy kicks 9 lunges
    – Butt kicks, hello dollys, and merkins in a 9-11-9 sequence

    Just enough time remained for a 90 second plank, and then we closed with a COT, name-o-rama, announcements, and prayer.

    As always, I’m appreciative of the opportunity to lead such a fine group of men.

    SYITG

  • Fall Back – from Steve

    Talk about a dark warmorama. About the only definable figure I could make out was, well nobody, really, since Shooter wasn’t there. Of course I knew Jose was present from the early morning grumbling, but the rest of the crew were shrouded in mystery. Given such circumstances, YHC delivered a clear disclaimer in case there were any FNGs (turned out there were two), and we got things rolling.

    Started off with the usual – good mornings, windmills, torso twists, arm circles, IW’s, Hillbillies, SSHs, High Knees – mostly at 10x IC, but a 15 and a 30 crept in there. I like to say those instances are “to keep the pax on their toes,” but of course the pax is smarter than that – they know it’s just early morning brain fog.

    We hadn’t moseyed to the playground in a while, so that was on the menu today, stopping at each intersection for a set of 10x deconstructed burpees. Zoolander’s No-Booze-November had hit a snag the night before (a snag by the name of Woodford Reserve), and so my originally planned set of x20 burpees seemed cruel as he had, not but 5 minutes before this point, requested “no burpees, please.” So we deconstructed instead, which would mean 10x squats, 10x groiners, 10x merkins, and 10x jump squats. Knocked those out at the three intersections and then hit a fourth one when we reached the playground.

    Then it was time for one of my lakefront standards, a partner routine where P1 wall sits and performs overhead air presses while P2 hits three stations: 10 t-merkins, 10 jump squats, 10 big boys. Three rounds of that and it was on to neighboring grass patch for a few games.

    That’s right, games. Let it not be said (Toto) that I do not include any fun in my beatdowns! First up was a game called When Animals Attack, which features one pax (it) bear crawling to tag any of the other guys, who are all crab walking. Any one who is tagged then performs 5 burpees and immediately joins in as a bear, to help tag the rest of the crew. I had initially envisioned a rabid, growling Tanked Up tearing through that patch of grass, but alas, when the sun finally rose this morning and it was clear who was standing before me, there was no Tank to be found. Grundy was the next best choice, so he became the first bear. Now, whoever invented this game clearly did not know the Northshore region’s distaste for crab walking because when the game finally began, the crabs all just sat in place waiting to be tagged. Some even moved closer to the bear! It seemed unanimous – the guys would rather do their 5 burpees and half-heartedly attempt to tag others than crab walk five steps. The next round was hardly better than the first, with Zoolander and his stomach of steel as the bear, and so we moved on to another game: Duck Jousting.

    To say duck jousting was more successful might be a stretch, but it was certainly more entertaining. In this game, it’s every man for himself. You get in a low duck walk position with your arms across your chest, and hobble over to the nearest pax to try and topple him without the use of your hands. Once you’ve been knocked over, you start high kneeing until the game ends.

    Though this was totally a Mathlete type of game, a surprise attack by Zoolander knocked him out early on. It came down to Jose, Swole, and Zoo. Swole attempted a Switzerland type of strategy, where he simply sat (or squatted) off to the side and awaited the victor between Jose and Zoo. But this proved faulty when Zoo took him down by surprise. By this point, our two gladiators had entirely abandoned the rule of duck walking (well, let’s be fair, Zoolander was never actually duck walking from the start). Even with an assist from Bird, Zoo was unable to take down Jose, but one final assault sent both men to the ground in a tie.

    Time to head back, so we formed two lines and Bataan Death Marched back to the flag. Once back, we did some single leg squats to the sea wall while Turbo graciously picked up the six. Quick Mary and time for COT. Welcome FNG’s Slater and Woody, and t-claps for hanging in there. Hope to see you guys back out soon. (And a personal thanks to our FNG’s for forcing me to write a backblast after months of negligence.) Hammer prayed us out and off to Book and the Bean for coffeteria. Appreciate the opportunity to lead you men, SYITG.

  • Another Cakewalk – from Russo

    Hurricane Ida wrecked a lot of plans this year. She did a lot of damage, broke a lot of hearts, made life a ton more difficult. But one thing I’ve learned is that even in the darkest of hours, God can find a way to turn something terrible into something good.

    I don’t want to belittle the struggle our region is still dealing with, and I can tell you firsthand there is a lot of work left. But I can also tell you firsthand that God has given us an opportunity to grow together, help each other, and all in all, be better people.

    My original plan for the first week in September was to do a birthday Q, and following the lead of Grundy and/or Zoolander (depending on how good an idea it was), complete another “Cake walk” and hope it catches on as a thing.

    Well, those plans changed due to Mother Nature, but God’s timing is perfect, so a pax of 17 said “Take Two” under beautiful weather with low humidity and temps topping out at around 71.

    Warmup (between 10x and 20x, all IC)
    Seal jacks
    Toe touches
    Arm circles
    Torso twists
    Goofballs

    Thang: A cakewalk, your basic descending ladder of exercises and reps, starting at YHC’s age (in this case, 43), and work your way to 1, with some moseying in between around Old Mandeville/Lakefront.

    The order:

    43 High knees
    42 SSHs
    41 Plank Jacks
    40 merkins (where Bird started to wonder where the burpees were)
    39 squats
    38 Hello Dollies
    37 Calf raises
    36 Apollo ohnos
    35 Freak Nastys
    34 step ups
    33 flutter kicks
    32 butt kicks (2 is 1) (lead IC by the entire pax rotating, very nice job, gents!)
    31 Peter Parker’s (2 is 1)
    30 imperial walkers
    29 Shoulder taps (2 is 1)
    28 American hammers
    27 George thoroughgood
    26 Smurf jacks
    25 leg raises
    24 Rosalitas
    23 crab jacks (crab position – opposite plank jacks)
    22 groiners
    21 Bear crawls
    20 murder bunnies
    19 Hand release merkins
    18 Bobby Hurley’s
    17 crab cakes (2 is 1)
    16 circle ups
    15 Bulgarian split squats
    14 durkins
    13 big boy sit-ups
    12 LMCs
    11 diamond merkins
    10 star jumps
    9 donkey kicks
    8 8 count body builders
    7 makhtar n’jais
    6 6 inch drills (where Zoolander was wise to my plan)
    5 Carolina dry docks
    4 Bonnie Blair’s
    3 jump squats
    2 burpees (here they are Bird!)
    1 minute plank

    COT, name-o-rama, announcements, and prayer closed us out.

    This Q doubled as my 3 year anniversary Q, so it’s time for me to again thank Toto for EH’ing me. Like I suspect has happened to many of us, I had no idea what I was in for. I showed up late to my first beatdown (Splice was Q) and quickly wondered what I got myself into. Manny’s words to me were “just stick with it” and he was right.

    More than once, I was the 6. I’m still the 6 on occasion. But each and every time, someone is there to pick me (or you) up. Tanked up was the first I remember. Shooter seems to do it the most (especially on moseys).

    And that’s what makes this group of men so darn solid. What started out as “I could use the exercise” or “I want to get back in shape” quickly turns to something more.

    The F for Fitness is lowercase. The other two are uppercase. I’ve enjoyed laughing with you all, especially when Hammer gets a pax going with his 80’s references, or Zoolander makes an off color joke about doing a Freddy Mercury. You each have enriched me, made me a better person, lended guidance, and just in general have been a blast to be around.

    Before I started, I didn’t have a lower back that constantly aches or stiffens up, nor did I have a left shoulder that tells me “That’s enough merkins for today.” I didn’t even know I had an Achilles’ tendon.

    But it has all been worth it. Ever nagging pain and shortness of breath: worth it knowing I’m making a decision to better myself as a leader, a Christian, a productive member of society. And that’s due to each of you, whether I called you by name above or not. Because finally, after 3 years, I think I’ve learned your real names, which is maybe a bigger compliment.