F3 New Orleans

Tag: Sonic

  • Kill or Be Killed (by Pope) – from Goose

    Some things you never get too old for. On the morning of March 4, YHC showed the PAX that grown men can run around (a lot) and play like the young men they once were. YHC showed up at the Peltch with a bag-o-flags filled with a limited amount of belt flags… the more PAX showed up, the more uncertain YHC became. YHC probably did more head counts in five minutes than he ever did in one day (impressive considering the amount of potential 2.0s at YHC’s home).
    We began with the usual warmup routine (SSH, imperial walkers, windmills, high knees, butt kicks, arm circles, cherry pickers) and headed to the EDW field. There, YHC distributed the belt flags which, thankfully, were distributed among all the PAX (Sonic and FNG each used one). We then split into teams and stationed at opposite goal lines for F3 Braveheart.
    To begin the first round, all PAX bear-crawled to the 20-yard line, then stood up and began the battle. Enemy PAX attempted to pull off their opponent’s flags (PAX had two flags; two lives) until one team is utterly vanquished. When a PAX was slain, he would drop and hold plank until the end of the round. The second round began at the 30-yard line with defeated PAX holding Al Gore. Finally, with the adrenaline of battle pumping through the veins, the third round resolved—every man for himself. YHC and FNG tied for winner because of unclear regulations concerning if someone went out of bounds. (Note: none of the rounds ended with any prize for the winning team, but no one asked…so…)
    The next thang involved a choice made by each PAX individually: 7 burpees at the start and halfway point of the entire track with sprints in between, or 20 Catalina Wine Mixers and a full-track sprint. Preference differed among the PAX. The second round, however, was an easy choice for most: 25 burpees and a full-track “sprint”, or 15 merkins at each corner, with lunge-walks for the straights and jogging on the curves (this obvious choice was YHC’s way of weeding out those who were NOT good candidates for the next ANIMAL). YHC, Goats in the Machine, Smooth Operator, and two of the four 2.0s chose the lunge-walk. Goats and the 2.0s switched choices a quarter of the way through… YHC was determined to finish when, two-thirds of the way through, Goose decided to catch the “ill-choosing” 6. We began to regroup and prepared to mosey, when we noticed Smooth still hammering out his third set of merkins! We picked him up and moseyed to the lower field with a pretty clear idea of our next ANIMAL.
    At the field Goose and YHC set up a small field about 30 yards long and initiated a game of PAX-&-Minnows. Goose started as the voluntary first shark and took his position at one end line while the rest of the PAX lined up on the other end. Throughout the two games played, the sharks began each round with two burpees with the minnows completing four merkins, then the minnows tried to make it safely to the other end line without being devoured (tagged) by a shark. Wounded (tagged) minnows dropped and performed LBCs until the round was over, while successful minnows did 10 star jumps in celebration of their survival. Coyote was the last man (well, person) standing at the end of the first game, and Lil’ Cuz remained after the second game.
    Back at the flag, Mary was performed in potluck fashion, with Coyote initiating box cutters and Lil’ Cuz calling leg lifts. Smooth was eager to lead us in burpees, and YHC reluctantly trumped with crunchy frogs. In COT our FNG, 2.0 of Superfun(d), was dubbed Superfas(t), reflecting his self-proclaimed performance in Braveheart and adding to our list of tee-tiny 2.0s. And of course, Smooth Operator left that morning with the well-deserved title of ANIMAL.
    SYITG, Pope

  • Super Bowl Pair-a-Dice (by Pope) – from Goose

    It’s Super Bowl weekend, and YHC was ready to rock, both at the flag this morning and in front of the TV later.
    After warmups, YHC introduced something he devised called “Down for the Count”, where the PAX did merkins in cadence and held Mission Impossible plank after the final rep, holding while counting around the circle in a Ring of Fire fashion, followed by the same thing with squats (holding Al Gore) and leg lifts (six-inch hold).
    Next we headed to the Thunderdome for what YHC dubs “Paradise & Pair-a-Dice”. YHC hit up JBL, who told us what he would do “If I had $1,000,000” (8-count BB on “If I had $1,000,000” with SSH/Imperial walkers in between) before rocking “Gangsta’s Paradise” (penguins during verses, gas pumps during refrain).
    When playing some role-playing games, dice with varying numbers of sides are often used to determine outcomes. Today was no different; the numbers rolled by the dice provided by YHC would decide between life and death for the PAX. Each PAX rolled three dice—a 4-side, a 20-side, and a 10-side (with numbers ranging from 10 to 100). The 4-side indicated the exercise (1: burpees, 2: 8-count BBs, 3: Catalina wine-mixers, 4: SSH) the 20-side gave us the reps for rolls of 1, 2 and 3, and the 10-side set the amount of SSH in the case of a 4 being rolled.
    The PAX then moseyed to the ED White football field, where we split op into two 6-man (or kid) teams. The following game of F3 football brought out two things—the Dion Sanders in Paradox and the “bigger, stronger, fast-ish” in the rest of the Thibodaux PAX.
    Prior to each down, the offense and defense did a set number of 8-count BBs (offense does 1, defense does 5 on 1st down, 2:3 on 2nd down, 3:2 on 3rd, 5:1 on 4th). The initial plan was for a scoring team to do 10 star jumps versus the defense’s 10 burpees, but 1) YHC forgot to mention it and 2) nobody scored. With interceptions by Yankee, Goats and Enron and a sack by Coyote, it was a defense-dominated game. Hmm… prelude to the Super Bowl? Perhaps.

  • After this 1st &10 YHC gives you the rest of the year off! – from Wiford Montana

    YHC was ready to make a splash to close out the year thankful to be a part of F3 Thibodaux. This was my first Peltch que and after a quick consult with my Dr. (POOx) I was ready to launch into the workout. 11 guys showed up, 1 new guy in the mix but new no longer, Welcome Splinter to the PAX!

    Warm up: all the usuals from a Tana warm up which means a total failure to launch and awkward silence and I ask myself why is no one counting… o wait that is suppose to be me. We were loose and ready now.

    Indian Run: all the way around the peltch last man hits 5 meekins as JBL brought the straight smoke with hits from the 70’s

    Ode to Anker: Lil Ed blues song
    2 monkey humper on monkey
    2 bunny hops on rabbit
    1 good morning on lion.
    *Spoiler alert: the monkey ends up eating the rabbit

    1st and a looong 10
    Run to goal and then ladder to every yardage
    10: man makers
    20: burpees
    30: merkins
    40: Thrusters
    50: Big boys
    60: squats
    70: plank jacks
    80: seal jacks
    90: ssh
    100: flutters

    We met back at the 50 to do 50 press ups and curls till I called it. Special t claps to all who got covered in a fair bit of mud and I felt the power from doing this together at each 10. Great job PAX this one in conjunction with the mud was something I have not yet done, only due to the extreme bass and tones of JBL hitting the journey songs pushed us through. Dox and JBL had the prescription we all needed.
    My last act in 2022 as YHC is to give the rest of the year off from F3 beatdowns!
    COT and Enron prayed us out!
    It’s been a year fellas glad to be here with each of you.
    Tana

  • A Day in the Life of a Cardinal – from Cardinal

    YHC was up late the night before due to a thrilling game-winning field goal as the clock ran out in the second-round playoffs of his alma mater. With Cardinal pride coursing through my veins, the beatdown began to form. We’d take the PAX on a journey back to a day in Cardinal’s life as a Cardinal – pun intended.

    We began with the usual warmup – SSH, IW, WM, the full Arm Circle gambit (forward, backward, cherry pickers, and Moroccan night clubs) and finished off with some grass grabbers (sans clap).

    Then we moseyed to a new location – YHC’s parents’ house, which is right across the street from the Peltch and right next door to the high school.

    A typical Cardinal day started with a brisk walk to school – living across the street has some perks – like waking up 10 minutes before class started and still getting there on time (as long as a brisk pace was kept). We did an Indian run, with the last PAX dropping for 7 merkins, until we finally arrived at the classroom building for the day to begin.

    Now YHC’s alma mater is known for many things – chief of which are the legendary biscuits. Buttery goodness that you haven’t imagined or experienced until you tried one. Paula Dean would be proud. You don’t want to know how much butter goes in them. But they are unmatched. YHC had one (sometimes more) every day for the course of my stint at the school (hence the current need for working out). But as you might imagine, they were popular. You had to get there quickly if you wanted to have any time of recess left (and God forbid you risk them running out!!!!).

    Thus – the biscuit sprint. The PAX paired up, with one sprinting from the classroom building to the student union and back while the other did 4×4 of merkins, mountain climbers, BBS, and overhead presses. We did two rounds, because the daily limit imposed by the school was 2 biscuits per student per day.

    Then, classes resumed until lunch. We moseyed over to the Card Yard for lunch time and another partner workout. PAX paired up, with one doing incline merkins while the other bear crawled to the other side of the Yard. Round 2 involved derkins and crab walks.

    We finished lunch time with a quick round of blackjack from the deck of death. Two PAX came out with 19’s so YHC decided to do both. I forget exactly what happened, but it involved many squats.

    We then moseyed to the football stadium for the pep rally for the big game. Rival week is legendary between YHC’s alma mater and their rival school. The Thibodaux PAX have their own fierce rivalry on Bluetooth speakers – Anker, cheap yet decent, vs JBL, who has been accused of being the weakest speaker in F3. We put them to the test in a head-to-head playoff of Flower by Moby. JBL’s turn involved doing what the song said via squats (up and down). Anker’s turn involved merkins (up and down). Who was the winner??? Jury’s still out…the PAX could come to no clear winner – no one is willing to change their allegiance.

    We finished out on the field by doing 1st and 10’s…YHC forgot a couple details, which Goose was happy to let him do, so we did 1 burpee/100yd sprint, 2 burpees/90yd sprint, and so on. It was a hard…really hard…but good way to finish out. Just like last night’s game was down to the wire, we couldn’t slow down if we hoped to finish in time. The PAX succeeded. Rumor has it Paradox upped his life insurance policy after the experience. Paradiddle really came alive and showed that he was made for burpees and sprinting – God bless him…

    A final thought I had that never materialized was recreating the “Stadium Cleanup” – after each home game, students would come the Saturday morning to clean up the trash. Enron unknowingly made it happen with the suggestion to help clean up after we finished out – a great F3 act of service.

    We moseyed back to the Peltch for COT and Goose praying us out. A great beatdown despite the misty rain that persisted. Grateful for these men!!

    And GEAUX CARDS!!!

    SYITG,

    Cardinal

  • The Beautiful Beatdown – from Yankee Joe

    Over the past few weeks, YHC has navigated a time of growth and reflection. In Marketing, there is a term called, “marketing myopia.” It is a concept that refers to a firm’s narrow focus on their own product development considering only internal strategies, along with competitors’ actions. As such, the organization loses focus on the two most important elements…1) the needs of the customer and 2) how their product can fulfill those needs.

    You see, YHC had also become myopic in his thinking, both about his place in F3 and subsequently, his beatdown designs. Following the St. Vincents 500 (hosted by F3 Thibodaux), I was exposed to the prowess of legends like Tanked Up, Hawgcycle, and Thibodaux Pax’s very own, Goose. With IPC 2022, in conjunction with the Jerf challenge, only to be followed by Burptober, YHC came to believe that all beatdowns should…ya know…kill you. Why else are we here?

    My dear gloom partner, I want you to know…nay, I need you to know…that I was wrong. But as only Ahtohallan knows, “when all is lost, all is found.” I embarked on a beatdown mission to find a balance between rigor, creativity, and, dare I say it, fun. That said, here we go.

    The game of soccer (or Football for the rest of the world) has its roots dating back to ancient China. However, since we cannot actually corroborate this with any real evidence, we’ll opt not to be wankers and go with the modern version, which popped up in 1860’s England (some say Germany). To distinguish the new sport from other games such as rugby, it was dubbed “Association Football.” The word “association” was abbreviated to “assoc,” with one who played the sport being an “assoccer.” As the game made its way over to the US, the term evolved into the word we know today, “soccer.” So if an obnoxious Brit ever gives you a hard time about the term “soccer,” simply inform them that you refuse to engage with a man who calls french fries, chips. And chips, crisps. I can’t. I just can’t.

    With that bit of useless trivia, we should really focus on the game itself. Though perhaps monotonous to the untrained or North Louisiana eye, the game is a chess match of fluid movement and strategy. Plays beginning from seemingly benign backfield passes, suddenly develop into offensive attacks with players moving in out of open spaces.

    The game is often called, “The Beautiful Game.” For this reason and in honor of the World Cup 2022, I offer you “The Beautiful Beatdown.”

    (First, YHC arrived early for setup and met Paradox for our typical pre-thang…wait…sorry. I’m not supposed to talk about pre-thangs. Moving on.)

    Warmarama: 11 PAX at the Peltch!!!

    The usual. YHC was losing his voice due to a constant rash of 2.0 plagues running through the castle, so I went fast. No time for mumblechatter, seriously screwing with Enron’s typical momentum. The sky was overcast and sputtering. We hailed the triumphant return of Paradiddle, a clear omen that today would be special. However, in my haste, many cadence steps were butchered. For a quick moment, Goose’s smile disappeared as if to say, “fix this or I will.” YHC got it together quickly. Mosey to the F3 soccer complex.

    Thang 1: Agility and Strength

    As this was the first part of our beatdown, we recognized the first World Cup in 1930.
    Setup: On a 30 x 10 field, one side corner several cones spaced closely for a total of 10 yards; opposite side corner the same set up. The pax split, half starting on one side and the other across the way.

    Pax began in staggered starts, side shuffling at full speed between cones for 10 yards, then 20 yard full sprint to other side; 19 burpees. Continue to opposite side cones. Repeat side shuffle and sprint going the other way then 30 merkins; Repeat side shuffle and sprint going the other way then 19 squat jumps; Repeat side shuffle and sprint going the other way then 30 Carolina Dry Docks.

    Notables: Wet Tap, recently off of IR, showed his typical prowess, barely breaking a sweat. Enron made a comment about 19 burpees being his limit, so YHC changed out 30 side straddle hops for squat jumps. I’m kidding, but Enron was on thin ice, you betta’ belee dat.

    Interlude 1: Shakira’s

    This Pax’s hips definitely lie…or at least significantly modify. Imperial walkers through the verses, Shakira’s on the refrain: low wide legged (goddess) squat with hands in praying position; remaining in squat, shimmy shoulders, while lifting alternating legs. Kinda like a squat version of the hand release merkin. Then Q’s choice intermittently with arm raised jump ups and open Pax freestyle.

    (At this point, YHC’s legs were burning from the fast pace work during the pre-thang with Paradox…Crap…sorry. I keep forgetting. First rule of pre-thangs is don’t talk about the pre-thangs.)

    Thang 2: The Goal of the Century (aka Oh Cosmic Kite)

    In the quarterfinals of the 1986 World Cup, Argentina went up against a strong squad from England. On that championship Argentinian team was a footballer named Diego Armando Maradona. Of all his countless successes, he is perhaps remembered most for the two goals during that match: The Hand of God and The Goal of the Century. Also on that day was another iconic moment provided by Victor Hugo Morales, the famous Argentinian journalist who was commentating for the match. Morales’ play-by-play of that goal, followed by what can only be described as fever pitched hysteria would move into history as one of the most recognized monologues of all time. The English translation is included at the end of the blast for your enjoyment.

    For this play, Maradona made a move down the right wing to receive a pass. Upon receipt, everybody assumed he was about to pass off to one of his teammates. However, two Englishmen closed in, blocking the passing lanes and getting within a few feet of the ball. What happened next became legend. Maradona switched directions and somehow threaded the needle between the two opponents, then set off to the races, juking and passing three more defenders on a 60 yard dash. With the English keeper sprinting out to cut off the angle and with two defenders hanging on his back, Maradona, at full speed, faked left a step, causing the keeper to fall, then scored. GOOOOOAAAALLLLL!

    The Thang:

    Partner up. 1st Round
    P1 dribbles soccer ball at full speed 30 yards to marker; Completes 86 LBC’s; sprints back with ball (total 60 yards)
    P2 holds flutter kicks for duration; flapjack

    2nd Round
    P1 dribbles full speed to marker; Completes 86 hand releases without merkin; sprints back
    P2 holds mission impossible plank for duration; flapjack

    3rd Round
    P1 dribbles full speed to marker; Completes 86 high knees; sprints back
    P2 holds Al Gore’s for duration; flapjack
    *screaming various soccer terms in multiple languages was encouraged

    Notables:
    – The 2.0’s, Coyote and Pope laid waste to the thang. Sonic (2.0 a la Goats), at five years old, made YHC look downright silly.
    – Lil’ Cuz continued to show his athletic versatility
    – Paradiddle quietly and efficiently dominated. I might be crazy, but I swear that guy never stopped smiling the entire beatdown. Beastmode.
    – Our north Louisiana Pax, Enron and Paradox, who claimed to know nothing about soccer, showed some seriously legit dribbling skills. In fact, Enron, YHC’s partner, got off the poop list due to his speedy rounds and minimizing my Al Gore time.

    (As Paradox and YHC reached the first half mile during our pre-thang, our pace was already at a sub 8 minute mile…AHHHHH. I can’t help it. I’m sorry. It won’t happen again.)

    Thang 3: Geese and Goats and Crabs and Bears, Oh My!

    That’s right, a soccer themed beatdown would not be complete without a crab-bear soccer match. The pitch was set at roughly 20 yards by 10 yards, using portable drilling goals on either side. Pax split into teams, the P1s and P2s from the previous thang. All pax started in bear. No hands allowed and you have to stay in some sort of plank. This last rule was VERY loosely interpreted, but it only added to the chaos. When one team scored, all Pax switched to crabs, while the team that was scored on did 5 burpees.

    Goal 1 came in the second minute. Wet Tap (P2s) deflected a pass across the middle from Enron (P1s). Playing stellar defense all day, Paradox (P1s) somehow managed to clear it out of their defensive third, sending a long ball to Goose (P2s) who was waiting at the top of the key, defending our goal. In a moment of confusion, Goose lost control of the ball and in a desperate attempt to kick it out of bounds, instead launched it into his own goal. He showed the appropriate amount of remorse.
    – P1s lead 1 to nil.

    Goal 2 came in the 6th minute off of the acrobatic play of Lil Cuz (P1s). The jiu jitsu training continues to manifest itself in the most incredible ways. I refer you, Dear Reader, to the History of Baseball Part 1 Beatdown, when he duck SPRINTED nearly 20 yards to make a diving catch. Was he offsides? Did he abandon his crab walk position? We’ll never know. Instant replay was not available and Goose was not prepared to use up one of his challenge flags. All we know is that Paradiddle was stealthily serving balls from the flank all game long. The result is the same.
    – P1s 2 – P2s Goose Egg.

    Goal 3 came in the 9th minute with 20 seconds remaining on the clock. Allow me to set the stage. There had been many attempts from Goose and other P2s to get the ball down to YHC in the offensive third. However, after YHC bungled nearly every opportunity, the focus shifted to Wet Tap (P2s), Sonic, and Pope. At this time, I should mention that the primary source of frustration for YHC and the P2s was a wily, smiling, and smack talking Coyote. Coyote was easily the defensive MVP for the P1s, fearless and seemingly everywhere at once. Prior to the leadup of the play development was a Paradox induced scrum that dragged Goats and YHC into the mix. The Homer (not Houma) style is strong, stubborn, and methodical. As a result the ball was moved back to mid field and cleared out of bounds. Like Batman and the Joker, Paradox and Goats showed what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object. A fifth dimension opens up. Come to think of it, I don’t remember seeing Goats at the Coffeteria. Somebody should look into that.

    THEN…a throw-in to YHC, who passed to the middle, but it was redirected to the flank. I could not see who it was in the mud and mist (perhaps, Pope), but the abstract mirage crossed the ball back into the middle yards away from the goal. The noise of the faithful began to rise, a crescendo of madness and delirious hope. Bodies swarmed to the middle like wolves as the ball soared through the air to its intended target. Suddenly a player leapt up above the pack. He was airborne and fully horizontal. Time stood still. Wet Tap finally believed Morpheus…HE was indeed the ONE. Wet Tap (P2s) ripped a massive scissor kick. Coyote’s knees buckled as he tried desperately to change course. It was too little, too late. The sound of the ball being swallowed in the back of the net cut through the hysterical tension…then a millisecond of terrifying silence just before the Pax erupted into an ear splitting frenzy of insanity. GOOOOOAAAAALLLLLLLL!!!!!

    – Final Score: P1s 2 – P2s 0

    Interlude 2: When Pele Met Freddie

    To the tune of Bicycle Race by Queen, Pax did 4 minutes of ab work. Q’s choice on ab exercises with Freddie Mercury’s on the refrain. Per Paradox’s feedback, YHC is still working on his Freddie Merc form.

    Mary to The Core!

    5 minutes of plank work, Q’s choice. Low plank, high plank, high side, low side, Nolan Ryan’s, Mission Impossibles, ALL WHILE doing alternating leg lifts and extended holds on leg lift in each plank position. YHC did not truly appreciate how hard this was going to be. I am proud that the Pax uttered NOT a word of mumblechatter (or audible to YHC at least).

    Mosey back to the flag, COT, and Wet Tap Armando Maradona prayed us out.

    Every opportunity to Q is another blessing. I am grateful for the trust, the humility, and of course the chatter.

    SYITHG,

    Yankee GOOOOAALLLLL

    (Paradox and YHC ran a 7:23 mile during pre-thang.)

    As promised, the commentating of Maradona’s Goal of the Century

    He’s going to pass it to Diego, there’s Maradona with it, two men on him,
    Maradona steps on the ball, there he goes
    down the right flank
    the genius of world football, he leaves the wing and he’s going to pass it to Burruchaga…
    Still Maradona! Genius! Genius! Genius!
    There, there, there, there, there, there!
    Goaaaaaaaal! Goaaaaaaal!
    I want to cry, oh holy God, long live football! What a goal! Diegoal! Maradona! It is to cry for, excuse me! Maradona, in a memorable run, in the best play of all times!
    Cosmic kite, which planet did you come
    from, to leave so many Englishmen
    behind, for the country to be a clenched
    fist crying for Argentina? Argentina 2,
    England 0!
    Diegoal, Diegoal, Diego Armando
    Maradona!
    Thank you, God, for football, for
    Maradona, for these tears, for this
    Argentina 2, England 0

  • 2 Year Manniversary of F3 Thibodaux! A Brief History of F3 Down the Bayou – from Goose

    The highly anticipated day had arrived. Costumes were donned, and the gloom was dark. So dark, in fact, that Paradox, fully decked out in unlicensed Jack Sparrow gear, did a full Helen Keller on an FNG, hands all over his face saying, “Goose, Goose is that you?” just because the guy showed up in a grayish Tundra. The FNG was accomodating, and YHC did show up a little later, overjoyed at the PAX’s costumes and their total disregard for how they’d fare in the rain, the dirt, and through at least 100 burpees. From giant furry vikings to skin tight Moana characters to full size pickles, these dudes were all in. Thankfully, God delayed the rain for a few hours, so the weather was perfect and the morale was super high (made even higher by Head Cheese’s dramatic entrance). We had record numbers at The Peltch, coffeeteria planned for the first time, and 2 years of an unprecedented journey to tromp through–it was an awesome morning!
    Warmup of the usual with last minute costumers trickling in (Picadilly’s pickle balls were amazing, even if they fell off during the first set of mountain climbers). PAX grabbed coupons out the truck, and we were off toward the lower field for the First Era of F3 Thibodaux: Goose-olation

    Era 1: The Genesis of the Beginning, The Dawn of the Origins, Part I
    Goose arrives in Thibodaux from Mandeville with nothing but a list of backblasts from NOLA, Northshore and BR. He couldn’t stop the progress, though, and had high hopes for what might develop. So, the backyard would have to do. For months, what drove him on was knowing that F3 brethren somewhere had already sweat through whatever beatdown he had pulled from the backblast list, so he wasn’t completely “alone”.
    The routine for this era would be The Big Bang:
    All PAX start in a bunch huddled around the coupons. First round, grab a coupon, do 5 OH presses, then mosey 10 steps out from the pack and do 10 burpees (facing outward for max isolation) before returning and plank up for the six.
    2nd round: 5 OH presses, mosey 15 steps out, 15 merkins
    3: 5 OH presses, 20 steps, 20 burpees
    4: 5 OH presses, 25 steps, 25 Hammers
    It’s a reality that pushing alone is way harder than pushing together, and the contrast was felt. Glad to move onto Era 2.

    Era 2: Random pop-ups
    The first to follow the dancing idiot into the madness was technically Cardinal, though he wasn’t seen again for many months (quoted as saying something like “that’s for the birds”). So, Wet Tap gets T-claps for coming out unaccompanied to throw himself into whatever Goose and his Goslings were doing out at Peltier. Then came Gordon, G.I. Joe, and Percolator, though because of work schedules and getting over the initial hump, attendance was random.
    This seemed a great opportunity for the randomness of the Deck of Death, so Wet Tap started us out under the Thunderdome with a random pull followed by three more (Irkins, Bulgarian split squats, and whatever those other two were…). Then, for the sake of time, we moseyed to the baseball field.

    Era 3: Enron
    Goose’s isolation, especially on weekdays, changed unexpectedly with the arrival of Enron. With the dogged determination and willingness to endure pain that only a younger brother could posses, Enron showed up to every beatdown he could and pushed himself hard to keep up with Goose. This quickly led to intense progress and his VQ (alone at The Peltch–for character building). His determination has never slowed, and his Q’s are well thought out (and typed out), usually including some sort of element of chance (for Cardinal).
    PAX partnered up for a grinder as a reminder of all those mornings at The Stage with just Goose and Enron. Split duty on 100 burpees at home plate while partner 2 runs the bases.

    Era 3: Return of the EH (and Crab Walk) King
    Cardinal eventually did return, and not only did he stick with it, even on weekdays, but the PAX quickly began to swell with his FNG’s, and his move to Chackbay has only widened his EH territory.
    The exercise would be Bear Crawl Tag Infection–Cardinal started at the pitchers mound and bear crawled around tagging the PAX, who were crab walking to get away within the confines of the infield. Once someone was tagged, he became part of the cult, switched to bear crawl, and began tagging the rest of the sad clowns (crabwalkers). It took no time for all to be tagged, ironically with Head Cheese being the last…So, we moseyed to The Chimney for Era 4.

    Era 4: Paradox
    As soon as Paradox even heard there was an F3, he had purchased tiny Mudgear shorts and within minutes had memorized the entire Exicon and the last 100 backblasts from the top 5 regions. And, his foot has never let off the gas. This next routine would be a nod to his name (you know, cuz he’s a doctor, and his wife is also a doctor, so they’re a pair-o-docs…), and to a couple of his Peltch Q’s.
    Partner up, both partners do 10 burpees, then one partner body drags another about 20 yards to the chimney, both do 10 more burpees, then flapjack and body drag the other back to start. This is where Paradox’s mustache exploded (the remainder of his facial hair) which made him Orlando Bloom’s character instead (props to Lil’ Cuz for that observation).

    Era 5: Lumen Christi
    Earlier this year Cardinal was able to talk a few of the young men who worked at the chancery with he and YHC to come out to a new beatdown on Tuesday mornings at Lumen Christ, the retreat center behind the chancery (with showers and everything). It was a glorious AO with a great crew, and some of the Thibodaux PAX would show up every now and then, too. Unfortunately, it wouldn’t last as the retreat schedule filled up (I guess it seemed a little less retreat-ish to have a bunch of sweaty dudes bear crawling down the hill to the Top Gun soundtrack or Indian running past the windows with cinder blocks over their heads).
    In a nod to Tighty Whitey (may he never be forgotten) and Enron’s near death experience at Lumen, we did Welsh Dragons up to 7, followed by a mosey to the playground.

    Era 6: SV 500
    The St. Vincent was arguably the best F3 fundraiser in the country (and maybe the world) for 2022 (and maybe for all time, past and future). Thanks to Paradox’s leadership and the buy-in of the rest of the PAX, it went off beautifully, tons of people attended, we had an incredible time, and we surpassed our goal of $10K for prescription meds for people in need. In honor if this incredibly blessed experience, we partnered up again for a quick Dora in honor of the partner race that raised the bar for many years to come.
    Partners would split duty on 100 flutter kicks on the playground side of the “mountain” while partner 2 ran over the “mountain” and did 10 Big Boy Situps on the other side and ran back. Then, moseyed back to the Thunderdome for the final eras.

    Era 7: Jerftember
    Yankee Joe’s arrival came and went like many who get a first taste of F3, puke, and don’t come back. But he did come back after about a month, puked some more, and became hopelessly addicted to growth. The Jerf was born out of this deep desire for more and more growth, and it opened a new era of Thibodaux PAX ownership, comradery, accountability, and WHOOP pressure. It also gave birth to BAPS, who still hasn’t fully proven himself.
    In honor of the Jerf, PAX lined up on the baseline under the Thunderdome for one full round of Jerfing. The sound of 17 PAX dropping cinder blocks onto concrete under an echoing pavillion is truly a glorious thing.

    Era 8: IPC and Burptober
    With one minute remaining, YHC led the PAX in 3 Kraken Burpees in honor of the unprecedented Week 5 of IPC and to finish out the 100 burpees needed for the second to last day of Burptober.

    Moseyed back to the flag, all still in full costume, for an incredible COT and our first ever coffeeteria. Fence Post was named (Welcome!!), Cue Ball was welcomed (originally from F3 Huntsville), and tables, donuts, too much coffee, and raw eggs were laid out under the trees. Conversation was awesome as the PAX rejoiced in the incredible blessing that F3 has been and the unrepeatable gift that each man has been to the whole group. The high from that morning has lasted for multiple days now, and it spilled over into record breaking numbers at The Stage this morning (including Fence Post!). Looking forward to the many years to come!

    See You In The Gloom,
    Goose

  • Wild World of Sports! – from Goose

    A solid 9 PAX (ultimately) gathered in the frozen gloom, though Goats in the Machine and the newly named Sonic rolled in a little late and had to meet us on the football field due to a classic 4-year-old shoe hunt.
    PAX: Enron, Cardinal, Kilo, Dumpster Fire, Goats in the Machine, Pope, Coyote, Sonic, Goose

    After a warmup of the usuals (SSH, AC, WM, IW, SL, High Knees and Butt Kicks), we moseyed to the E.D. White football field for the first Thibodaux experience of 1st and 10. Started on the 10 yard line with 10 merkins and 1 burpee followed by a sprint to the goal line and a mosey back to the 20 for 9 merkins and two burpees. Sprinted to the goal line and back to the 30 for 8 merkins and 3 burpees, etc. until we ended at the goal line with 1 merkin and 10 burpees.

    Enron and YHC both noticed the unique, exhilarating feeling of running the length of a football field into the endzone, realizing that it wasn’t something either of us have experienced outside of maybe special teams. I guess late 30’s is better than never, though the roar of the crowd sounded more like wheezing and cursing.

    Nice, long mosey from the field to the Thunderdome hauling all the layers we shed after two minutes on the football field. PAX completed the following on the bleachers:
    20 R Leg step ups
    20 Freak Nasties (YHC shared newfound knowledge of why dips are called Freak Nasties: “Dip, baby, dip!”)
    20 L leg step ups
    20 Irkins
    15 Box jumps
    15 Derkins

    PAX gathered armfuls of wardrobe and moseyed to the diamond for animal baseball:
    Round 1:
    All PAX started at home, revving up with 20 mountain climbers before bear crawling to first, crab walking to 2nd, duck walking to 3rd, and bunny hopping home.
    Round 2–Animals have gone Rabid!
    Started at home by pounding the frozen ground with 10 Mahtkar N’Diayes, then Crawl Bear to first, Walk Crab to 2nd, Walk Duck to 3rd (interesting), and Hop Bunny home.

    Indian Run around the park followed by some Mary at the soon to be built flag: Crunchy Frogs and Nolan Ryans.
    Welcome Sonic!
    COT and Enron prayed us out.
    SYITG,
    Goose

  • My cadence is pure

    I missed F3 last week while I was out of town – in Puerto Rico. I enjoyed the break but F3 buckteeth worked me pretty hard in the Isla de Encanto.

    Saw Tube Steak first thing and I offered him a high five and he gave me knuckles – so that started off the 10th of June in an awkward manner. It was a breezy and cool AM. Gave a serious disclaimer then we started our beatdown.

    Mosey to the Oak Alley for some hand release merks 10, 8, 6, 4, 2 for a complete 30 hand release merks. Back to the track and a decent paced mosey to the row bars. At the rows we did Rows, Hand Release Merks, SSH, Imp Walker Squats (12 is the count), and Mtn Climbers. 5 stations.

    Then we did a long run to the fountain. Run a running man, then jog one. Ping Pong to the 6 until all the PAX are at the fountain. Funny some of the fast guys went to sweep the 6 but it wasn’t one of our guys.

    At the fountain we did right leg step ups, left leg step ups, decline merks, incline merks and dips. Had to stop the PAX for not being in sync. #mycadenceispure

    Back to the track – Hallelujah run to the golf green.

    At the green we did dying bug x 25, low country crab x 20, o mary x 12, russian twist x 15, and jingle vader led us in 26 flutter kicks.

    Back to the track – we ran to the pull ups – monkey bars. Here we did XYZ while some pax did pull ups. Ran out of time here – so we cleaned up with horses to the stable. Plank and wait at the flag. Got to the flag at 614am so we did squats until 615.

    Lots of good times in the GLOOM. Closed with a prayer for my friend with cancer, for the people still recovering in Puerto Rico.