F3 New Orleans

Tag: Russo

  • The Bear Necessities (Song)

    Look for the bear necessities
    The simple bear necessities
    Forget about your whining and your strife
    I mean the bear necessities
    Old Grundy’s evil recipes
    That brings the bear necessities to life

    Wherever I wander, wherever I roam
    I couldn’t be fonder, of my F3 bro’s
    The PAX as fussy as can be
    And to think it’s all because of me
    When they looked into the groupme chats
    And took a glance at the glove demands
    Then said, maybe I’ll fartsack this too…

    The bear necessities of life will come find you
    They’ll come find you! (Looking at you EIEI)

    Look for the bear necessities
    The “simple” bear necessities
    500 yards of bear crawls will suffice
    I mean the bear necessities
    Then after we can rest at ease
    With just the bear necessities of life. (Coffee and F2)
    With just those bear necessities of life!!!

    Hope you enjoyed the song! I’ll be releasing an album of all of my F3 hits coming this Fall.

    YHC thought that all of us needed a good reminder of just how hard a Saturday F3 beatdown could be. Those 15 extra minutes can be absolutely brutal. We always need that reminder.

    With that in mind, this beatdown was going to bring a pain that will never be forgotten.

    #NeverForget

    Warmup

    SSH 20 IC
    Seal Jacks 20 IC
    Shoulder Series
    Carolina Dry Docks 10 IC

    Mosey to the open field for the main event.

    THE THANG

    FIVE ROUNDS:
    20x SQUAT JUMPS
    50 YARD BEAR CRAWL

    Before we moved onto the next set of crawls we hit core with some Reverse Manny Crunches and LBCs.

    FOUR ROUNDS:
    20x SPLIT JUMP each side (sister mary catherines)
    40 YARD BEAR CRAWL

    THREE ROUNDS:
    20x BURPEE
    30 YARD BEAR CRAWL

    We formed two lines and staggered back indian run style to the flag. After we got back, an excellent display of what F3 is all about occurred with many men going back to leave no F3 man behind.

    We circled up and counted off and Butt Splice prayed us out.

    I couldn’t be more proud to be a part of this group of the highest quality men and to be pushed beyond what I believe is possible. It’s an absolute honor to be able to lead you men any opportunity I get.

    Until next time (after I’ve recovered from this one…)

    Grundy

  • Fuzzy Balls

    22 PAX strong on the Mandeville Lakefront. 23 if you count Brat who joined us for a little foreplay as he works his way off injured reserve. Brat, an officer with the NOPD, injured himself successfully tackling and arresting a bad guy. The PAX’s consensus is that he should use a Tazer next time Indiana Jones style or perhaps transfer to a Northshore police agency where a polite request to stop, issued with an English accent, is all that is required to apprehend a criminal.

    Kicked things off with warmup of seal jacks, toe touches, SSHs, imperial walkers, merkins, and Jane Fondas. We then divided into three teams, and YHC retrieved his bag and revealed his fuzzy balls.

    Each team received a fuzzy tennis ball (yes, YHC had three) and instructions to race with it about a half mile west along the Lakefront to the Shaft. To begin, there were only three rules: first, you cannot run if you are holding the ball; second, no pass backs-you cannot receive a pass back from the man you just passed to; and third, the entire team had to stop dead and perform five burpees every time the ball touched the ground before proceeding. Then Cowbell whipped a legal pad out of his briefcase and starting asking questions and for clarification on a few items so we ended up with a few more rules. No wonder you guys don’t get anything done on the Southshore.

    Circled up upon arrival at the Shaft for T merkins and alternating Supermans..

    Back to the races with another tennis ball sprint further westward along the Lakefront to the playground where we circled up for prisoner squats, hand release merkins and crab cakes.

    Raced back eastward with our fuzzy balls to the Shaft for a third COP consisting of a merkin wave, lunges, Supermans, arm circles, overhead hand claps, and air presses.

    One final race back to the shovel flag, wrapping things up with some Mary…single leg raises, scuba Steves and a 60 second plank.

    Countorama, nameorama and Phoenix prayed us out on the way to the coffeeteria.

    Thanks for letting me lead, guys, and thanks for competing so earnestly in the silly tennis ball game.

  • Run For the Roses It Was Not

    With the rain clouds threatening, and the forecast looking just as ominous, YHC did not know how many PAX would brave the elements for today’s beatdown. Of course, YHC should have known better as 17 men posted on the Mandeville Lakefront despite the rainy, wet conditions. Actually, the rain combined with a nice breeze to cool things off, providing a break from the recent humidity. But of course, mornings like this one are reminders of what it means and feels like to be “alive”, as Maverick alluded to in our closing prayer.

    WARMARAMA

    SSHs, Good Mornings, Torso Twists, High Knees, Butt Kicks, all to about 15 IC

    THANG

    Hat’s off to ZooRich for his imaginative, golf-themed beatdown last Saturday on the Lakefront. From what I hear, it was legendary! With no ideas of Grandeur Dancing around in YHCs very small brain, YHC decided it was time for a downpainment (more on that later) of sorts. After a quick mosey to the east towards RIPS, it was time to circle up for some Al Gore’s (3 sets, about 30 sec hold). Sprinkle in a set of Peter Parker’s and Parker Peter’s and it was time to mosey eastward again. Before turning up Lamarque St. to head to the Milestone Marsh, the PAX hit the seawall for some: Freak Nasties, Derkins, and Step-Ups.

    Sweat pouring, the PAX headed up Lamarque St. circling up at each intersection for some exercises: Flutter Kicks, Hello Dollies, Mission Impossible, Crunchy Frogs. The neighbors must have wondered, “who are these idiots, laying in the street while its raining?”

    MILESTONE MARSH

    Circle up at midcourt for a quick Merkin Wave, then down to Chill Cut with nearly each man giving a 10 count before recovering. Before heading back to the Lakefront, YHC must have been having a flashback to a recent Bushwacker-led beatdown at the Marsh: 10 Burpees.

    Indian Run back to the Lakefront with the last man dropping for 2 merkins before sprinting to the front of the line.

    Back at the Lakefront, YHC realized he had forgotten to recognize the master 10 Burpees. After all, Bushwacker borrowed it from somebody, don’t we all do that? Yes we do; so hat’s off to Coconuts, the master of 10 Burpees at the Milestone Marsh. Here’s hoping to a return to health, my friend!

    Circle Up on Lakeshore Dr. one last time for a rapid fire series of Bear Crawls, Bunny Hops, Shuffles, Back Pedals, and Sprints back and forth to the seawall. For good measure, sprinkle in some merkins, box jumps and freak nasties.

    With no time to spare, it was time to head back to the flag for Count off, Name o rama and COT. Welcome FNG Hansel, one of Zoolander’s neighbors (how many neighbors does he have?) to F3 Northshore. I hope your experience will be as powerful as mine.

    Thanks to Maverick for praying us out.

    Thanks men for braving the elements this morning. Thanks for following my lead, despite the lack of creativity for the beatdown. I heard that no one paid the green fee at the Zoorich Classic last Saturday, so good citizens as we are, I felt F3 Northshore had to make a little downpainment with interest.

  • ZOORICH CLASSIC

    After a quick disclaimer and Warmorama (18 x SSH, 18 x Toe Touches, 9 Windmills), the Pax moseyed westward and partnered up to commence a frisbee golf challenge. We had 18 holes i.e. crawfish trays (‘tis the season!) with a total course length of ~1 mile. For each hole, one partner threw the high quality, PDGA-approved disc (courtesy of Dollar General), while the other partner performed the following exercises between strokes for the respective holes. Partners alternated throwing and exercising throughout the course.

    Between Strokes

    Holes 1 – 3: Bear Crawl

    Holes 4 – 6: Wheelbarrow

    Holes 7 – 9: Lunge Walk

    Holes 10 – 12: Groucho Walk

    Holes 13 – 15: Frankensteins

    Holes 16 – 18: Burpee Broad Jumps

    Once the team completed a hole, both team members performed the following exercises with the rep count equal to how many strokes the team took to complete the hole.

    Hole          Exercise

    1                # x Freak Nasties

    2                # x Jump Squats

    3                # x Derkins

    4                #  x Squerkins

    5               # x Copperhead Squats

    6               # x Hello Dollies

    7               # x Gwerkins (As if the Squerkins weren’t bad enough)

    8               # x Burpees

    9               # x Donkey Kicks

    10            # x Plank Jacks

    11            # x Sister Mary Katherines

    12           #  x Big Boy Situps

    13           # x Crunchy Frogs

    14           # x Groiners

    15          # x Body Builders

    16          #  x Dive Bombers

    17         # x Box Jumps (No one completed as time ran out)

    18         # x Patty Cake Merkins (No one completed as time ran out)

    Team BEAN HAMMER started out rough with the first throw on the first hole in the Lake, but quickly recovered.

    Team STEVE GRUNDY put on a racy display of Squerkins, which are very likely to never be incorporated into another F3 Northshore beatdown.

    Welcome back two Pax back from Injured Reserve, Butt Splice and Tanked Up!, who inadvertently won unattributable points for best team name: BUTT TANK!

    Thanks to team JOSE RUSSO for scooping up the coupons at the end.

    Team scores were recorded on scorecards provided by the Q and tallied below with penalty 6s for unfinished holes. This simplified scoring normalization yielded team Shooting Sparks as winner of the 2019 Zoorich Classic. Congrats guys. Wear this badge of honor proudly!

    Counterama, Name-orama, ceremonial naming of FNG – Speedy Gonzales, and Butt Splice prayed us out. 19th hole coffeeteria at our usual spot. Thanks for allowing me to lead, Men. Hope you enjoyed it as much as YHC had dreaming it up. SYITNG!

  • Northshore Convergence – 3 Year Anniversary

    We all come to F3 as individuals, men with our own past and our own unique stories.  But we all share one very similar story, which is the story of our first post to an F3 beatdown.  This story usually involves a little fear, a lot of pain, and in some cases, a splash of merlot.  My story took place at Grandmother’s House (before it had a name), and I can be honest and say it was filled with trepidation: Will I be able to make it through this?  What if I don’t like some of these guys?  Are they going to ask me to lead part of it?  And why the heck am I up so damn early???

    Everyone knows how the story goes – YHC was accepted but quickly pushed to be a better man in all aspects. That impact – an effect felt on all F3 brothers – is what we came together to celebrate on the Lakefront today. F3 has now been thriving and changing men on the Northshore for three years now.

    A few lucky Southshore men arrived early, unaware they’d get roped into a 2 mile pre-thang. Back at the flags (four flags this morning), YHC gave a quick welcome and disclaimer, and we got this thing started:

    Warmorama:

    Three years, three sets of 8-count bodybuilders.  Founding year 2016, so 16 reps of each.  Sprinkled some standard warm-ups in between:

    • 8-count bodybuilders x16 IC
    • SSH, IW’s x20 IC
    • 8-count bodybuilders x16 IC
    • Toe Touches, Windmills x20 IC
    • 8-count bodybuilders x16 IC

    The Thang:

    3 Stations for 3 Years: Every Man Leads

    Leadership is one of the skills F3 hones that YHC is most thankful for. It’s also the thing YHC was most uncomfortable with those first few weeks. These stations were meant to honor the leadership impact that F3 spreads.

    The PAX was split into three groups, with three leaders picked for an impromptu lead at each station. The leader got two minutes to come up with a routine while the rest of the PAX circled up for Peter Parkers x15 IC, Shoulder Taps x15 IC, and Merkins x15 OYO.

    If memory serves, here’s what each leader had us performing:

    Station 1: The Gazebo, led by Sparky Time

    Freak Nasties x10 IC, Step Ups x10 IC (each leg), Squats x10 IC, repeat.

    Station 2: East Swingset Pad, led by Jose 10k

    Squats x10 IC, Jane Fondas x10 IC (each leg), Lunges x10 IC, Monkey Humpers x10 IC.

    Station 3: West Swingset Pad, led by Russo

    Little Manny Crunches x10 IC, Six-Inch Exercise x10 IC, Crunchy Frogs x10 IC. (Pretty sure there was something else in there….)

    Mental and Physical Toughness with Fracsac

    Next up, the baton was passed to Fracsac for a little taste of the Southshore. He told us of his recent Spartan Race with Triple Shift, how challenging it was, and how F3 had prepared him both mentally and physically.  So this next pearl would exemplify both. 

    The physical part was an Indian Run (PAX split into 2 groups), where the man sprinting to the front would yell out an exercise, the PAX would quickly disperse and perform 5 of said exercise (burpees, jump squats, derkins, one-armed merkins, to name a few) before getting back in line and continuing the run.  Halfway through we were stopped for the mental exercise: perform 21 SSH’s, with only the first 10 called out in cadence.  If one man fails to halt at exactly 21, there was a penalty of 30 burpees.  After some mumble chatter about who’s cadence was the correct cadence, we all performed the penalty burpees. The Indian run then headed in the opposite direction, with the same mental exercise waiting at the end of the line – this time 17 SSH and only 6 called in cadence.  Another failure and another 20 burpees were in order.

    Team Races: Pushing Each Other Forward

    YHC took the final pearl with some competitive team exercises. This section was cut short due to time, so we did one quick hopscotch race: the original three teams lined up in plank position, with the last man rising to bunny hop over the rest of his team, and then drop back into plank position. Teams finished once their last man crossed the finish line – the infamous lakefront shaft.

    The two losing teams would need to do a penalty exercise, but the true winning team would never be known because there were some last-second shenanigans on all three teams as they neared the finish line. So we all performed the penalty together: the 8-count exercise known as Absolution.

    Mosey back to the flag, where Shooter led a very abbreviated Mary of planking before we called it.

    COT: Count-o-rama, name-o-rama, naming of an FNG (welcome Stockboy!) and Triple Shift led us in a prayer of thanks.

    Coffetería brought out a few of our injured brothers, with Butt Splice, The Manny, and Tanked Up joining us. T-claps to our Southshore brothers for making it across the pond to make this a true convergence, it wouldn’t be the same without you guys. And t-claps to all the guys who led today, it’s an honor to work beside you men. SYITG.

  • Mr. Anderson’s On the Clock

    With a high of 59, 20% chance of rain and breezy, the forecast promised an invigorating and intense Saturday beat down. But instead, morning rain, still, humid air and Jose 10K helped deliver and invigorating and intense Saturday beat down!

    PRE THANG

    The usual pre-thang suspects gathered at the usual pre-thang time to run the usual pre-thang 2 miles. T-claps to to Waterpik for taking the pre-thang red pill, despite a scheduling conflict for the beat down proper.

    WARM O RAMA

    x20 IC:

    SSH

    Imperial Walkers

    Butt Kicks

    Slow Squats

    Cherry Pickers

    Arm Circles (10>, 10<)

    THANG

    The newly spoken-for King of the Pre-Thang and this month’s current ISI crusader Jose` 10K joined YHC for his VQ, and the baton was now passed his way. The PAX mosied to the Marsh for 10K’s very own On the Clock. 12 stations were set up in a circle, including merkins, jump squats, LBCs, putins, shoulder taps, lateral jumps over cones, soccer ball taps (rocky balboas), peter parkers, plank jacks, and 3 others. moving from station to station, round 1 was 41 seconds each, round 2 was 30 seconds each.

    Pax mosied down Larmarque back to the lakefront where we split into 2 teams for 4 rounds of sloppy tug-of-war. Winners got to pick from 2 options for the losers’ penalty exercise while they planked. There was a “HALF-assed” 100 yard bear crawls, 25 burpees, 50 mountain climbers, and 100 LBCs.

    After the last round, we mosied back to the flag all holding on to the battle rope for the last 2 minutes.

    MARY

    With 2 minutes to spare, Jose lead the PAX in a quick round of righ and left side jane fondas.

    COT

    Count off and name-o-rama, before Pastor Grundy prayed us out. Congrats to Jose 10K for poppin’ his cherry! It was a great beatdown, and we look forwards to more opportunities to experience his leadership.

    POST SCRIPT

    Of course, a proper back blast would not be complete without special mentions of Zoolander’s kilt…will it make another appearance tonight?

  • HardCORE in the Foggy Dew

    RunRangerRun is 50% complete, and according to northshore team 1 captain, Steve, we are in 7th place for runners nation-wide! The maverick machine, Amnesia, has taken sole ownership of team 2, and chugging along! With all of that in mind, YHC pulled in this gloom just in time to jump into the 2 mile pre-thang along with the other pre-thangers, as well as the pre-pre-thangers. With Butt Splice in the mix, there would indeed be a competitive pace man to chase.

    Related image

    The rest of the Saturday warriors were eagerly assembled in the hazy morning around the flag in anticipation of the beatdown in store for them. With the House of Steve under quarantine, Captain Core stepped in to cover Q.

    WARM O RAMA

    15xs IC:

    Cherry Pickers

    Arm Circles (forward 10/reverse 10)

    Imperial Walkers

    Torso Twists

    High Knees

    Slow Squats

    20 Merkins OYO

    THANG

    Mosied to the Gazebo for:

    20 Bay City Scissors – 8 count (horribly bungled in the case), with Flutter Kicks for 1-4 and Hello Dollys for 5-8

    Image result for bay city scissors

    25 Irkins on the sea wall

    20 more Bay City Scissor (thanks to Zoolander for selflessly pushing the PAX;)

    Mosied to the far side of the fountain for:

    Big Os – on the sea wall, with legs extended, swing legs in on O. IC 10 counter clockwise, 10 clockwise

    25 Dirkins

    Partner up for:

    While P1 runs to designated tree 25 yards or so away and back to switch out, P2 does cumulative: 1) 200 Chill Cut Peter Parkers 2) 200 Freddy Mercurys and 3) 200 Gas Pumps (legs extended and in for a crunch)

    25 Freak Nasties

    10 Burpees

    5 Burpees

    20 Merkins

    Mosied back to the gazebo for:

    Guantanamo – circle up on your 6, legs straight up. each man take s a turn to go around the circle pushing legs down, as each man brings them back to the sky. Today’s exercise just showed that guys can turn ANYTHING into a competition!

    20 Paddy Cake Merkins – Head to head, partners do simultaneous merkins and alternatingly slap hands

    Image result for paddy cake push ups

    Mosey back to the flag for:

    25 Ic:

    100s

    Putins

    Little Manny Crunches

    Monkey Crunches – in sit-up position, crunch and reach for the outside of your ankles

    30 seconds each of: Plank, Chill Cut, Mission Impossible, Chill Cut, Plank, 1 hand- right arm up, 1 hand – left hand up, Back Plank (Heeeey Baby!), Freddy Mercurys

    Tanked Up has the anticipation building for his F3 party on March 16th and 2nd-timer, Shrimp Boots prayed us out.

    Great job done by a hardCORE PAX , with much appreciation for following QICs lead. May your activities of daily be preformed more steadily with your freshly worked core.

    Image result for hardcore



  • North Shore Chest & Core (I Think I’m Gonna Be Sore)

    QIC takes some pride in the idea that a Saturday beat down with Bushwacker as Q is going to be fairly intense (even if that idea is only in my head). F3 means different things to different guys. For some, it’s a great workout with some great motivation. To others, it’s having fun hanging out with fun guys who share similar values. And yet to to others, it’s an opportunity to lead and be lead, while setting an example and support for their brothers. To YHC, F3 is all of that and more! It can be said that there is a duty to the men who get out of the sack to meet the gloom for the Q to provide value at any given AO. How much value did you find today……?

    Pre-THANG FOREPLAY

    Rolling in a few ticks behind schedule, YHC was grateful to run into a healthy pack of pre-thang PAX on the return trip of their 2 mile tour.

    WARM-O-RAMA

    15XS each IC:

    SSH

    High Knees

    Good Mornings

    Butt Kicks

    Windmills

    THANG

    Four Corners: Girod, Claiborne, Marigny, Lakeshore

    1. (with a nod to Shooter) 25 Burpos
    2. 20 Burpos, 25 Rower Sit Ups
    3. 15 Burpos, 20 Rower Sit Ups, 25 LBCs
    4. 10 Burpos, 15 Rower Sit Ups, 20 LBCs, 25 Heal Pulses

    Burpee Mile: 12 Burpees followed by a run up Marigny x4

    Mosey eastward for…

    Captain Therkin:as opposed to how it was SUPPOSED to go with 1bigboysitup for every 4 putins with 5 merkins between each set…

    we did 1 merkin for every 4 big boy sit ups with 5 putins between each set…SORRY GUYS

    PAX did some semblance of an Indian Run back to home plate where we did…

    Circle Burp:While doing constant high knees, each man in turn called “down!”, whereupon the PAX dropped for a burpee. Continued until each had a turn.

    MARY

    x10 r foot on l knee, reach l elbow to r knee FLAPJACK

    25xs:

    Dying Cockroach

    Leg Lifts

    10xs:

    (Bastardized) Cockroach Resurrection…just for Tanked Up

    Crunchy Frogs

    V Ups

    30 seconds each:

    Plank

    Chill Cut Plank

    Mission Impossible Plank

    Left Hand Plank

    Right Hand Plank

    Plank

    COT, NAME-O-RAMA, PRAYER

    Russo prayed us out.

    I hope I brought value to this day for all of you gentlemen. I am humbled by your allowing me to lead you into battle!

  • The Morning before the Nightmare before Christmas

    18 strong on the Mandeville Lakefront this morning, our warmup circle of pain expanding as the sun rose with long lost veteran EiEi finding his way out of the fartsack and back to the PAX just in time for the standard disclaimer.

    Off to the races with a warmup of Seal Jacks, Imperial Walker Squats, Toe Touches, Windmills, and Side Straddle Hops, all 20x IC.

    Mosey towards the Harbor for the next COP:  T Merkins, Jane Fondas, Wife Pleasers, Merkin Circle, Nolan Ryans, and Flutter Kicks. All IC with various rep counts.

    Mosey again towards the Harbor with another COP stop for front to back lunges, monkey humpers, and copperhead squats.  Again IC with various rep counts.

    Then all the way to the Harbor playground.  YHC divided the PAX into six teams of three for some rarajipari variations around the playground.  Good times and all in line with YHC’s diabolical plan to run the PAX as much as possible this morning to train surreptitiously for the Krazy Ivan without wearing them out for tomorrow afternoon’s Nightmare Before Christmas beat down.

    Indian Run back to the shovel flag for our countorama, nameorama and a prayer.

    Welcome FNGs Big Ugly, Bolt and Hawk!

    Thanks for letting me lead guys.  YHC always appreciate you playing along with my hare brained ideas.

  • This Looks Familiar

    Ideal weather conditions for a Saturday morning beatdown at the Lakefront. YHC was looking to repeat the soreness experienced after Turbo’s Cinder Block beatdown the Saturday before.

     Pre-thang warmorama

    11 x Toe Touches                            16 x Scorpions

    12 x Smurf Jacks                            17 x Monkey Humpers

    13 x Twist & Pivot                         18 x Arm Circles

    14 x Goofballs                                19 x Air Presses

    15 x Imperial Squat Walkers      20 x Windmills

    Mosey

    The Thang – This is about where Grundy pointed out that “This looks familiar”, as Q obviously incorporated some P90X exercises into the routine.

    10 x Spiderman Merkins

    10 x Dive Bombers

    2 x Plank Compass w/ Merkin

    10 x Burpie Scrambles

    10 x Patty Cake Merkins

    —Bear Crawl to the Lake Wall—

    20 x Heel to Toes (on Wall)

    20 x Box Jumps

    20 x One Legged Squats (on Wall)

    20 x Snowboard Hops – Thanks to Coconuts for leading the cadence…because every day is leg day.

    20 x One Legged Cross Hops…or Tony Horton’s Hot Foot

    —Bear crawl back to the field—

    10 x Depth Charges

    10 x Bushwacker Burpees

    20 x Mother Superiors – slightly intensified version of Sister Mary Katherines…too intense for YHC who took an obvious extended break half way through

    —Mosey—

    11s: Freak Nasties and Donkey Kicks with Carioca in between

    Clarence Carter Squat Hops – 2 lines of Pax do 3 squat hops to the right, 3 to the left, 1 forward, 1 backward, 180 deg around. Rinse and Repeat.  Looks like Strokin…we even squeezed in some “Sassified” Wife Pleasers as Bushwacker serenaded with the lyrics.

    Mosey to shovel flag for Counterama, Nameorama, and many thanks to Barely Legal for praying us out.