F3 New Orleans

Tag: Royal Deuce

  • NOW that’s what I call Dem Commitments vol 2 – from Paradox

    YHC launched several cafeteria EH campaigns the day after a fruitful July 4 beatdown and had quite a few nibbles working well into the evening until most were derailed by a glorious late night firework show. The two FNGs that did show however, were both whales in their own right. One, a youthful man’s man of only 4 years earthly experience but clearly an old soul. He came on retreat to sleep and do man stuff and he was already full up on rest. The second is more of the Moby Dick FNG. Aged and scarred, he’s dodged EH harpoons for a decade and our own Goose serves as his personal Ahab with so many name producing stories that the list could produce its own beatdown. In the vast sea of emotional headlocks , AnyfisherQ that prepares to land FnGs of this magnitude must also consult the veterans of old for a retreat beatdown battle plan. Ole Ahab was ready and waiting. And that’s how YHC found himself on the HeartRidge lake dam at 5:27a with 2 FNGs (1 legacy plus the aforementioned white whale) 3 regulars (including the newly minted Egon) , a preloaded Goose DC beatdown (if Goose puts “dem” in a title you should be afraid) , a few psalms in his heart , anddddd a list of names for these potential FNGs.

    Duke !!
    Its retreat beatdown round 2
    Roll the footage!

    Warmup
    Standard issue in a deep gloom
    keeping cadence with crickets, bullfrogs and whiporwills.
    We got right to dat action boss.

    The below is an adaptation of Goose’s “Dem Commitments” beatdown circa March ‘23.

    Verbal, written and retinal scanner consent were obtained for copyright use.

    1. ) Individual Prayer
    Indian Run from dam to the big hill loop with drop off jumps squats

    This to represent finding the time during the day to get quiet and converse with God or just maybe to just do some squats.

    2.) Couples Prayer
    Lazy Dora – 10 reps with partner in static hold then flip flop till 100
    100 merkins (plank)
    100 Squats (al gore)
    100 flutter kicks (6 inches)

    3. ) Family prayer
    Ring of Fire taking turn with 3 burpees and IW while Johnny Cash warned us about love being a burning thing.

    4. ) Couples Dialogue
    “11’s “
    Starts with 10 Apollo Onos and 1 leg raise with “The Hill” in between. As Goose alluded this is where the real work in DC begins and it was the same for this beatdown.
    This is where the record scratched and we really got to see what the soon to be named HeMan calls “doing man stuff”.
    The hill was relentless but no match for the tenacity of our multiple surgical jointed FNG. His push through the hill and blasting through his comfort zone will be burned into my memory for a really long time.

    *editors note
    -Thibodaux Rouses reports that after this beatdown “YJ taking to random strangers in the grocery line about his poor ole back ” incidents are now down 78%

    Ya love to see it

    A well earned light mosey back to the dam for COT, prayers of gratitude and some very important naming.

    When I first met our youngest FNG he showed me a fisher price work bench along side a pillow and blanket then explained it was there so he could wake up and do the man stuff. These pure alpha characteristics earned him the moniker of HeMan. Father Royal Deuce approved and it was so.

    Our elder FNG, the aforementioned scarred whale, had a epic but non traditional naming ceremony as YHC knew Goose, who has a lifetime worth of stories with this gentleman, needed to have atleast a swing at a fine surname. So we unveiled the list pre set by his old friend :

    Chainsaw Massacre
    Lead Baloon
    Wiley Coyote
    And finally …
    ..Puzzle Face

    I can’t quite explain the level of snickering that took place during these listings ( fng included ) but when the smoke cleared Puzzle Face was the clear winner and we knew that at that same moment somewhere in La, Goose was doing the Robert Redford meme nod.

    Men, thanks for the effort this week during a jam packed retreat schedule. You are a reminder to YHC that no hill is to high , no barrier to strong when we allow God to supply our source of strength

    It’s a joy to lead ya

    SYITG
    Dox

  • In Pursuit of Trivialities – from Goose

    YHC was excited about this one–it would be an opportunity to break out one of the best board games ever created, one that combines chance with constantly new challenges. Combining Trivial Pursuit with F3 seemed like a match made in heaven. And, with recent experiences of PAX coming through in superhuman ways any time trivia has been present at a beatdown, YHC knew he could bring the heavy.

    16 strong at The Peltch showed that the crew had caught the excitement; either that, or the high quality GroupMe banter has forged bonds and created some useful FOMO in the hearts of many men. It was great to see Royal Deuce at his first major league beatdown, and the return of G.I. Joe for the third Saturday in a row boosted the morale considerably. Oh, and Yeah-Yeah came with Popeye for the first time since his full-on return, which was a great boost for the 2.0’s. Looking forward to getting to see him grow out there!

    Warmups of the usuals with some extra emphasis on the lower back followed by a mosey to the Thunderdome with the mystery box hidden in a bag for a last moment reveal. Upon arrival YHC unveiled a more modern version of Trivial Pursuit with cards split into colors/categories with questions on each ranging in difficulty from 1-6 depending on the dice roll. YHC also had a list of exercises to match each category in the case of a wrong answer. Another dice roll determined which exercise was chosen.

    The first couple of questions were mowed down easily, and Yankee Joe showed that he’d be a force to be reckoned with today and possibly in some future, post-kids’-bedtime game night. (He’s on my team. I called it.) But, alas, the typical “I said the right answer but I wasn’t sure enough of myself to push the team captain to go with it” dynamic struck, and we lined up for a Bataan Death Crawl, one of the History category exercises. It consisted of the PAX splitting into two lines, Indian Run style, to bear crawl from the Thunderdome to the opposite, third base-line foul pole in the neighboring ballfield and back. The last guy in line did 5 burpees before running to the front of the crawling line. The total distance was about 100 yards. Nice opener. The mood had changed considerably–wrong answers were clearly to be avoided with all seriousness.

    The next series of questions revealed the prowess of G.I. Joe, whose Quiz Bowl champ son had clearly exercised his Trivial Pursuit training upon his father. He came in strong with some logical deduction revealing what all Trivial Pursuit veterans know–the answer is usual revealed in some form in the way they ask the question. Cardinal picked up on this, too, which was to be expected.

    After Royal Deuce saved the PAX with some deep Simpsons knowledge, it was back to the list in the Science and Nature category. A minute and a half Mission Impossible plank in the grass would give us the opportunity to do make some up-close observations of what has recently become a very scary place. For some, it provided a chance to work through some PTSD. For others, it only added fuel to the growing menace. The time was shortened to a minute to save the morale and the fragile mental state of a number of the PAX.

    If YHC’s memory serves him, the streaks of correct answers grew shorter and shorter as time went on, and periods of muscle burnout, sweat, and trash talking grew more frequent. Here are some of the more notable penalty exercises:

    -Field of Dreams (Art and Literature–it was a movie based on the book, “Shoeless Joe”): PAX split into four groups on the baseball field, one group at each base and completed the following exercises AMRAP as they waited for the group at home to complete 15 burpees so they could be relieved and run (for some) to the next base. 1st base: squats. 2nd: merkins. 3rd: LBC’s. 15 burpees is tough, especially after AMRAP merkins, and they take a while. And, thankfully, the Form Police isn’t authorized to give fines; though, that could have been a great way to cover some of the SV500 costs…and pay for next year’s event in full…and purchase an F3 trailer.

    -Geography: Around the World lunges–lunges forward R, L, left side, back L, R, right side = 1. We did 10 of these in cadence, speeding up as we went. It was fun. And, that was the only one we had to do for Geography. Nice work, fellas.

    -We did none of the awesome exercises on the Entertainment list, which means all pink questions were answered correctly. I’m not sure if I should be impressed or depressed.

    -History didn’t get landed on too much, so the Bataan Death Crawl was the only representative.

    -Arts and Literature–there were a few close calls, but Field of Dreams was the only one from this list, too. Surprising, and impressive, especially given the large amount of purple cards drawn.

    -The Science and Nature category required two penalty exercises–the aforementioned observation plank and the Failure to Launch, Blastoff jump squats. YHC counted down from ten as we slowly lowered into a very low squat before jumping up. Did 10 of these.

    -It was the Sports and Leisure category that suprisingly destroyed this crew. Not long after the death crawl, we rolled the Bear Crawl Brawl in which partners pushed against the shoulders of one another to provide resistance as they bear crawled from first base to the opposite outfield pole (about 30-40 yards), flapjacked and returned.
    We also did Bobby Hurleys (30 IC, 2:1), Nolan Ryans (15 IC on each side), and Apolo Ono’s (30 IC, 2:1).

    The hour ended too quickly, but had some fun, worked the ol’ noodle, took some chances, and burned some muscles before heading back to the flag for count off and COT. Animal shirt went to Cardinal for navigating/instigating the “HC” battle on GroupMe, and then lots of strong prayer intentions for F3 brothers in need before a hand-gesture-filled photo shoot. (Oh, and Coyote made the formerly agreed upon transfer of the SV500 trophy to his teammate Redfish for admiration and safe keeping until next they meet.)

    Thanks for playing along, fellas! It was fun to see how each guy’s brain works under stress and what kind of knowledge is stored in which guys’ heads. Till next time!

    SYITG,
    Goose