F3 New Orleans

Tag: Picadilly

  • A New AO? What the BLEEP?? – from Goose

    After Lumen Christi told us their retreat schedule was getting too packed to let a bunch of rowdy, burpeeing, snake biting, HIMs run around the otherwise quiet and reflective property every Tuesday morning, YHC made a quick hunt for a solution. The first choice was Schriever Park, and after making a visit on the way home from work, it was clear that it had great potential: playground equipment, benches galore, bleachers, baseball field, large fields of grass, and tennis courts. So, at 6am, 5 PAX hesitatingly made their way through the gate and into a new frontier. It doesn’t have an F3 name yet, but it certainly delivered this morning, and all were in agreement that we’d be back next Tuesday. (A little PTSD always keeps you coming back!)

    Warmup: When YHC didn’t start with SSH, the PAX had to pick their brains up off the grass, but it was premeditated; it was necessary. After starting with windmills and going through the rest of the usual routines, this time including high knees and butt kicks, YHC revealed that we’d be finishing with 29’s. It’s like 21’s, but today is Cardinal’s last day to be 29, so the theme was set.

    29’s: PAX do 29 SSH in cadence, but only the first 7 are counted out loud. Then, the rest are completed in silence, but if all the PAX didn’t stop exactly on 29, there would be a 10 burpee penalty. With 5 PAX, YHC was sure there would be burpees, especially with Enron’s tendencies with numbers. But, in one of the cleanest, most dramatic endings YHC has ever seen, all PAX stopped dead at exactly the same time. It was beautiful. It was inspiring. And we felt really good about ourselves for the last time that morning.

    Bleacher crawl merkins:
    Moseyed over to the baseball bleachers where all PAX crawled up one bleacher at a time completing three merkins (irkins) on each. Then, turned around and did the same thing coming down (headfirst, so three derkins on each).

    “29 Ways”:
    Moseyed to the Thunderdome 2.0 (smaller covered pavilion, but reminiscent of the large one at The Peltch). Played the song “29 Ways” by Marc Cohn, a favorite of YHC’s growing up and perfect for the day’s theme: 6 inch hold for the duration, leg raises on every “29”, and Hello Dollies for every “door” and “more”. This definitely ranks in the top 5 hardest songs this crew has done.

    BLEEP Test:
    YHC hadn’t heard of this until digging through the Exicon last night, but it seems like it’s a generally well known fitness routine/performance test. Using a Bleep Test app that beeps at shorter and shorter intervals over time, the PAX lined up on the tennis court and ran to a line 20 meters away at every beep. Anyone who couldn’t make it to the line before the next beep was “out” and had to complete continuous rounds of 29 squats, 29 air presses, and 29 toe touches until there was only one PAX remaining.
    The first few beeps were easy enough and gave the PAX plenty of time for a quick breath between runs, but that didn’t last long. It became clear pretty quickly that speed wasn’t what was needed for victory–it was oxygen. So, after one round, YHC reset the timer and lined us up for a second–there’s only one way to get better at this!
    We discussed future plans for all PAX to PR, then test again a few weeks/months later to mark improvement. Ought to be fun!

    29 burnout:
    Moseyed back to the Thunderdome 2.0, and in cadence, completed the following on the picnic tables: 29 L Leg stepups, 29 Freak Nasties, 29 R Leg stepups, 29 Irkins, 29 alternating stepups, and 29 Derkins.

    Moseyed to the flag for some Mary: 29 LBC’s IC, 29 Penguins IC, and 29 Big Boy Situps OYO (because Cardinal will be a big boy tomorrow!).

    COT and prayer with gratitude for a cool new AO, and on our way out, a walking couple stopped us to ask who we were. The guy was a Marine and law enforcement vet, and he was fired up to see us out there. Turns out, he’s also a pastor at a local Baptist church, and the likelihood is high that he’ll be FNG-ing soon, hopefully with some of his congregation to follow!

    Thanks for following my lead, guys, and for grinding it out today!
    SYITG,
    Goose

  • What time is it? Hill:30 – from Goose

    A solid five PAX climbed the hill on another beautiful morning at Lumen Christi, awkwardly quiet at first about YHC’s choice of a smedium Superman shirt (with velcro cape). Why? Getting dressed in the dark? Delusions of grandeur? No, just cuz it’s stupid, and it might distract a little from what we were about to endure.

    Warmup: the usual faves–SSH, WM, AC, cherry pickers, IW, self-love

    Thang 1: 30’s
    YHC had some exercise ideas, all utilizing the hill, but we needed a theme. The date was 4-26-22, so for the first Thang, we just added 4 + 26 to get 30. That’ll do!
    Round 1, nonstop: 15 Hand Release Merkins at the bottom of the hill, then run over and 15 at the other side; 15 jump squats at the bottom, 15 on the other side; and 15 big boy situps on each side.
    Starting to love the hill! So, Round 2, nonstop: 10 Hurpees (hand-release burpees) at the bottom, 10 at the top, and 10 on the other side; 10 Bonnie Blairs at the top, 10 at the bottom, and 10 back at the top; then 10 crunchy frogs at the other side, at the top, and at the bottom.

    Thang 2: 52’s
    Now that we felt intimately connected to the hill, we chose to remain there and added the number of the year to the total (4 + 26 + 22 = 52), partnered (and throupled) up to complete the following, Dora fashion:
    52 Hurpees
    52 Step-ups on the picnic bench (2:1)
    52 shoulder/toe taps (plank and tap each shoulder and each toe = 1)
    While Partner 1 hammered away at these reps, Partner 2 ran up the hill backward and back down forward (though after the hurpees, we switched to running forward up and down).

    Mary: 20 leg raises, 20 wife pleasers, and 30 penguins.
    The cape remained velcroed in place throughout the workout providing many performance enhancing benefits despite early mumblechatter suggesting otherwise.

    COT and Paradiddle prayed us out. Lots to pray for, and lots to be grateful for. Thanks for posting, fellas, and for pushing hard together!

    See You in the Gloom,
    Goose

  • Holy Saturday and a Visit from a Forefather – from Goose

    As the PAX slowly trickled in at the Peltch on the morning of Holy Saturday, we tried to guess whose car was pulling in as soon as we could see the headlights down the road. But one car mystified us, even as it pulled to a stop in the parking lot–was it another one of Tighty Whitey’s FNG’s showing up nervously without him? Or, was it an overly excited little league coach coming to set up his dugout a few hours early? We were way off. White hair was the first thing to become clear in the gloom, and then a Run Cajun Run shirt–could it be? Yes!! It was Reluctant Yankee! I had the distinct pleasure of directing the following proclamation to the PAX, “Gentlemen, this is the founder of F3 NOLA, and today he has deigned to join us bayou PAX for our humble beatdown at The Peltch.” YHC would have preferred to have some trumpeters, a red carpet, and a scroll to read from, but all we had was Coyote, my 10-year-old 2.0, who rattled off as many F3 terms as he could think of (“fartsack” came up multiple times).
    Ultimately, 12 PAX, including an FNG, were present as we commenced a Holy Saturday themed beatdown.

    Warmup: SSH, WM, AC, Cherry Pickers, IW, high knees, butt kicks

    Thang 1:
    Moseyed to the Thunderdome for a Flora 1, 2, 3 and a couple of songs. The theme was uncomfortable waiting–Jesus is lying dead in a dark, stone tomb, and we’re waiting with him.
    Partnered up for the Flora (waiting in uncomfortable positions while your partner completes his reps):
    1. Partners split 100 dips, each does 10 at a time while the other holds dip position (down).
    2. 200 air presses in people’s chair against the columns, 20 at a time while other holds chair position.
    3. 300 flutter kicks, 30 at a time while other holds legs six inches off the ground.

    Song 1: “While I’m Waiting” by John Waller–held plank for the duration (almost 5 min.) and 3 mountain climbers (2:1) every time he said “Waiting” (90 mountain climbers total). YHC’s calves are still sore.
    Song 2: “The Final Countdown” by Europe–side straddle hops for the duration (over 5 min.) and three Bonnie Blairs (1:1) for every “Final Countdown” (over 50 total).

    Thang 2: Empty Tomb
    When the disciples saw/heard the tomb was empty, the waiting/difficulty wasn’t immediately relieved. There were questions, confusion, running, freaking out, etc. So, the PAX lined up at the first of three cones and completed 20 Chinooks (arm circles over the head) to represent the women freaking out and telling the disciples the tomb was empty, and then sprinted to the second cone to represent to apostles running to the tomb, and then army crawled from there to the third cone (crawling into the tomb to check it out).
    Repeated this 5 times (and gained some souvenir brush burns in the process).
    Then, all PAX ran backward to the last cone and back followed by carioca to the last cone and back.
    Then, partnered up and PAX 1 ran backward from the first cone to the third, and PAX 2 sprinted to try to catch him once he reached the second cone (like Peter trying to catch up with John). Flapjack and then rinse and repeat.

    Indian Run around the park gave YHC a chance to chatter with Yankee a bit about F3 leadership, followed by some substantial Mary at the flag. Tried to include 10 Absolutions, a somewhat complicated 8-count plank exercise, which failed miserably, leading to the obvious lesson that absolution (cleansing from sin) can’t be earned. Other exercises were crunchy frogs, wife pleasers, leg raises, and a couple of other things, I think.

    Count off, name off, and named our FNG Neanderthal–welcome!! Announcements included a push to hop in the clown car headed to the Northshore for the Zoorich Classic this Saturday, and Kilo prayed us out. Thanks, gents, for letting me lead, and huge thanks to Reluctant Yankee for the surprise visit!

    SYITG,
    Goose

  • Providence and Classics for the New Guys – from Goose

    YHC was excited about the potential for record breaking numbers at the Houma location, Lumen Christi, including a unique FNG: priest #2 for the Bayou PAX! (Fr. J.D. Matherne, pastor of St. Hilary in Raceland will heretofore be known as Cutthroat!). However, at 5:45am, with what sounded like a Category 3 outside the house, YHC was scheming hard about how to boost morale in the howling wind, the pounding deluge of rain, and lightning popping all around. I knew that with this relatively new crew, we couldn’t break one of the major principles of F3 this early in the game, so gear was donned and prayers were said as YHC prepped to walk out into this mother of a storm.
    Thankfully, things changed quickly, and not only did the rain let up, but the sky cleared and revealed a gorgeous sky (and eventually a full rainbow!). Even the ground was relatively dry (besides some slick patches of clover, which left some PAX eating turf when bear crawling down the hill). Morale was extremely high with little to no effort as the PAX continued pouring in for this young location. Ultimately, there were 8, a record, and the warmup commenced:

    Warmup: all IC–20 Side Straddle Hops, 20 WindMills, 15 Arm Circles (each way), 15 Moroccan Night Clubs (shimmy included), 20 Self-Love, 20 Imperial Walkers, 10 High Knees, 10 Butt Kicks

    Thang 1: Dora 1, 2, 3
    YHC wanted to make sure these guys get some solid experience of the classics, so we started with a standard partner Dora wherein partners split 100 Hand Release Merkins, 200 Apolo Ohno’s, and 300 American Hammers. For the first 100, partner 2 ran backward up the hill (Nur) and forward back down. For the second, it was run up and bear crawl down (clover is slick!); and for the third, crab walk up and run down.
    At first, YHC inadvertently looked pretty smart to Enron and a few others knowing Ohno’s middle name, but then Cutthroat ruined it by revealing that for a decade, everyone only ever heard all three names (Apolo Anton Ohno). But, YHC turned the tables in the next Thang (Cutthroat, you don’t know NOTHIN’!!)

    Thang 2: Double Song Power!
    Moseyed to the hill with the cross and pulled out “Flower” by Moby–hold Al Gore for every “Sally down,” and only come up for every “Sally up”. It’s a thigh burner, and a favorite of YHC, especially for new guys–an added element is that if they can guess the lyrics, we stop. They never do. FNG hopes are dashed on the rocks of ignorance, and it’s nobody’s fault but their own.

    Song 2: Chumbaburpee! Another favorite since it’s one of the rare times that burpees are a yearned for break from something unexpectedly worse. Side straddle hops for the duration of the song, and burpees for every “I get knocked down, but I get up again.” Side straddle hops for that long are pretty torturous at the end of a long workout, so flopping down to the ground almost feels good. Except at the end (20 burpees in a row).

    Classic Indian Run back to the flag for some Mary: in an effort to continue to grow the PAX’s knowledge of the Exicon, everything with a ridiculous name gets priority. All IC x15: Crunchy Frogs, LBC’s, Wife Pleasers, J-Lo’s.

    COT and Elmer’s prayed us out. Welcome, Cutthroat, and thanks be to God for a gorgeous morning and a great group of men!

    See You in the Gloom,
    Goose

  • The Great Nursery Rhyme Beatdown of 2022 – from Goose

    Kilo warned us it might happen. “Bring a towel,” he said. “It might be wet out there,” he said. But, little did he or the rest of the PAX know the level of carnage that YHC had in store for this cold, windy, soggy morning. Of course, Cardinal may have used his spiritual upper hand to gain some kind of foresight that led to his admittedly pure, unexcused fartsacking. The rest were caught off guard by what at first seemed to be just a semi-creative way to work through a hard, but not impossible Tabata list. But, then came Jack and Jill…

    Warmup: the usual Goose faves–SSH, WM, AC, IW, and Self-Love with some high knees and butt kicks to wake up the cardio system

    Thang 1: Tabata (“It’s Italian for…”)
    One minute, as many reps as possible (AMRAP) of each of the following exercises, with 30 seconds of rest in between, which was long enough for YHC to explain the next nursery rhyme and its connection to the assigned exercise:
    * Humpty Dumpty—wall sit
    * Jack be nimble—hop back and forth over a line, feet together
    * Sing a song of sixpence—8-count body builders (the king was in his counting house…)
    * Pop Goes the Weasel—monkey humpers
    * Old King Cole—wacky jacks (like a jester)
    * Georgie Porgie—suicides (when the boys came out to play, Georgie Porgie ran away)
    * Little Boy Blue—BBS (wake up, boy!)
    * Little Miss Moffet—Dips (rise up off that tuffet!)
    * Peter Peter—Peter Parker Peter
    * Old Mother Hubbard—Nolan Ryans (reaching into a bare cupboard, coming up empty-
    handed)
    * Rockaby Baby—LBC’s
    * Three Blind Mice—mosey to the sidewalk in front of the playground (see how they run).

    Thang 2: Jack and Jill
    Partner up (Jack and Jill): Jack (partner 1) runs up the hill to fetch a pail of water, and does five jump squats at the top before coming back down, while Jill (partner 2) falls down (burpees). Partner 1 takes over the burpee count upon returning until 100 are completed. Then, Jack broke his crown: 100 Carolina Dry Docks, while partner 1 still ran up the hill to do five jump squats. Lastly, Jill came tumbling after, which meant 100 Superman/Canoes while Jack still ran up for jump squats. Superman/Canoes = PAX started on faces in Superman position (arms and legs up), then rolled to the six without the use of hands to Canoe position (head and legs a few inches off the ground, hands down by hips).
    The combination of that many consecutive burpees with jump squats at the top of a small hill seemed to be a new level of suck for many of the Bayou PAX, but complaints were few. Could’ve been because we still hadn’t laid in any cold puddles yet (Superman/Canoes were done on the sidewalk.)

    Thang 3: Deal or No Deal
    YHC left the nursery rhyme theme behind for the last 15 minutes as we moseyed to the practice field and the heretofore hidden F3 Deck of Death was revealed. (Note: the cards are very much waterproof, mudproof, and tear proof, but the box is very much not.) Each PAX was given a chance to pick two cards but only look at the first. They could then decide whether all would complete the first card’s exercise, or blindly commit to the second.
    Though most of the ridiculously hard cards were avoided, the greater majority of exercises chosen seemed to require lying in the mud, so Kilo’s warning was well grounded. Due to the high winds, most PAX were still wearing their sweatshirts (even after Jack and Jill) so they soaked up the frigid puddles like sponges. The mosey back to the flag was heavy and cold, but spirits were high as the proud PAX discussed making t-shirts or getting tattoos that said, “I survived the Great Nursery Rhyme Beatdown of 2022!”

    COT and Paradox prayed us out.

    Thanks for letting me lead and being willing to keep pushing, especially you new guys who are still working through your first weeks of this! And, much gratitude for you somewhat more experienced PAX who have decided that F3 is now a part of how you do life well. Your companionship in the gloom is a gift beyond value!

    See You in the Gloom,
    Goose

  • Bringin’ em Kids to Church – from Goose

    For only the third ever beatdown in the Houma area, a record five PAX gathered, anticipatorily subdued, in the gloom on Tuesday morning on the top of the hill at Lumen Christi. It didn’t take long to get the mumblechatter going, though, once Paradiddle showed up in a fly tanktop in sub 60 degree weather. YHC sadly lamented all the tanktops his M talked him into tossing not long into marriage, and then commenced the warmup.
    PAX: Tighty Whitey, Elmer’s, Picadilly, Paradiddle, Goose

    Warmup: (all in cadence) 20 side straddle hops, 20 windmills, 10 arm circles (fore, then back), 15 cherry pickers, 20 self-love (Michael Phelps), and 20 Imperial Walkers.

    Theme: Taking little ‘uns to church.

    Thang 1: From the parking lot
    Short mosey to the truck where official F3 coupons (stenciled cinder blocks) awaited. Partnered up to become married couples (or a throuple in one case) working to get the kids and their gear from the parking lot into the church.
    Partner 1 farmer carried two coupons (baby carrier, diaper bag, what have you) while the other did five big boi situps (bigger kids tying shoes, falling down, etc.) before running to catch up and swapping with Partner 1. Once arriving at our destination on the other side of the lake, we realized we got the service time wrong and it was already 3/4 of the way over, so rinse and repeat back to the top of the hill (the next closest church), but this time dying cockroaches instead of situps (kids on the ground throwing tantrums).

    Thang 2: Taking loud kids to the back, and forth
    Down by Souby Hall, just outside the huge windows for all inside to watch (just like at church when you have to leave with a screaming child), PAX completed a set of 7’s. At one end, started with 6 flutter kicks (tantrum) before backward-lunge-walking (genuflecting to the altar) to the other side for 1 goblet squat (squat with coupon held under the chin, like trying to quiet a 30 pound baby with sharp, concrete corners). Then, lunge walk forward (genuflecting to the altar) and upon arrival, completed 5 flutters (next tantrum) and repeating with 2 goblet squats on the other end and so on until 1 flutter and 6 squats.

    Thang 3: Sporadic Prayer
    In the same area, PAX completed a Jack Webb. (In full transparency, YHC took some delight in what seemed to these newer PAX to be a quick, harmless ascending ladder of 1 merkin and 4 air presses starting at 1:4 and ending with 10:40. I mean, how heavy can air be?) It was like the age-old pattern of getting down and dealing with squirmy kids, and then standing and praising the Lord for a few seconds before needing to get low to quell more squirmage. Needless to say, air is very, very heavy, and praising the Lord takes some serious effort sometimes.

    Thang 4: Back to the vehicle
    Rinse and repeat Thang 1, but 10 Freddy Mercuries on the way out (2 is 1), and 5 burpees on the way back. Finished at exactly 45 minutes, grateful for the chance to finally put the kids (I mean coupons) down and go home to take off those darn high heels and put our feet up. It was hard, but it was worth it!

    Thanks for joining, fellas, and for seeing the value in pushing hard on a Tuesday morning!
    See You in the Gloom,
    Goose