F3 New Orleans

Tag: Mitt

  • Fuzzy Balls

    22 PAX strong on the Mandeville Lakefront. 23 if you count Brat who joined us for a little foreplay as he works his way off injured reserve. Brat, an officer with the NOPD, injured himself successfully tackling and arresting a bad guy. The PAX’s consensus is that he should use a Tazer next time Indiana Jones style or perhaps transfer to a Northshore police agency where a polite request to stop, issued with an English accent, is all that is required to apprehend a criminal.

    Kicked things off with warmup of seal jacks, toe touches, SSHs, imperial walkers, merkins, and Jane Fondas. We then divided into three teams, and YHC retrieved his bag and revealed his fuzzy balls.

    Each team received a fuzzy tennis ball (yes, YHC had three) and instructions to race with it about a half mile west along the Lakefront to the Shaft. To begin, there were only three rules: first, you cannot run if you are holding the ball; second, no pass backs-you cannot receive a pass back from the man you just passed to; and third, the entire team had to stop dead and perform five burpees every time the ball touched the ground before proceeding. Then Cowbell whipped a legal pad out of his briefcase and starting asking questions and for clarification on a few items so we ended up with a few more rules. No wonder you guys don’t get anything done on the Southshore.

    Circled up upon arrival at the Shaft for T merkins and alternating Supermans..

    Back to the races with another tennis ball sprint further westward along the Lakefront to the playground where we circled up for prisoner squats, hand release merkins and crab cakes.

    Raced back eastward with our fuzzy balls to the Shaft for a third COP consisting of a merkin wave, lunges, Supermans, arm circles, overhead hand claps, and air presses.

    One final race back to the shovel flag, wrapping things up with some Mary…single leg raises, scuba Steves and a 60 second plank.

    Countorama, nameorama and Phoenix prayed us out on the way to the coffeeteria.

    Thanks for letting me lead, guys, and thanks for competing so earnestly in the silly tennis ball game.

  • The Millennial Beatdown

    Who knew that a workout titled “The Millennial” would actually be difficult? One would assume that given the reputation of Millennials, this would be the workout equivalent of watching Netflix. That being every 5 minutes someone asks “are we still working out”? Instead, we were introduced to a series that put the PAX and YHC into survival mode.

    But before that we warmed up with (All in cadence):
    1. SSH
    2. High Knees
    3. Butt Kicks
    4. Windmills
    5. Shoulder Series

    We then moseyed to Noah’s Ark (what I think we should call the neutral ground near Rips ever since Hammer’s beatdown) for the main event.

    Like I said before, the workout routine was called “The Millennial” and this is what we had to do. The goal is to get to a total count of 2000 as a team (roughly the time period Millennials were born). 1000 reps of exercises and 1000 meters of running. It turned out the loop around Noah’s Ark is around 350 meters versus 100 and so we ended up running around 3,500 meters. But as demonstrated on Saturday, my counting was not up to even 5th grade levels (as was pointed out by Jose).

    The sequence was the full pax does 100 reps each of a called exercise, then runs a lap back to a point where they gather again for the next called exercise. There were 10 cycles, which would get you to your number of 2,000 (Or 4,500 in our case).

    Millennials are always taking credit for other’s people work so why should the workout be any different? The first nine cycles end when the FIRST person gets to 100. The last cycle, is done together because eventually Millennials need to learn that they have to pull their own weight.

    We started each set with 6 burpees (It was 5 upon initial construction but changed last minute which led to a multiplication error).

    The sets were: 1) Carolina Dry Docks; 2) Squats; 3) Russian Twists; 4) Merkins; 5) Lunges; 6) LBCs; 7) Shoulder Taps; 8) Monkey Humpers; 9) 100s; 10) Burpees (Remaining number to get to 100 after burpees from previous rounds)

    We moseyed back to the flag and arrived at 7:30 on the nose. We circled up and Hammer closed us out.

    Thanks for letting me lead gentlemen. You always make me better!!!

    Over and Out,
    Grundy

  • MARSH MADNESS

    In honor of the recently completed NCAA Championship, QIC devised the inaugural F3 Northshore Marsh Madness that paid homage to none other than former U of Arkansas head coach, Nolan Richardson, whose teams’ up tempo and intense pressure defensive style was known as “40 Minutes of Hell.”

    With lighting and thunder behind us, the light rain subsiding, and many regulars crushing Ragnar, our group of 7 got started.

    Quick Warmorama around the invisible shovel flag consisted of Sweet 16 x Toe Touches, Side Straddle Hops, Bobby Hurleys, Makhtar N’ Merkins (6 count Makhtar N’Diayes followed by a Merkin). Maverick came in hot at the end of the warm up to round out the Pax of Elite 8.

    Pax moseyed ¾ miles to the Milestone Marsh, home of F3 Northshore’s Monday morning beatdown. Following instruction, Pax partnered up into 4 x 2 man teams at each corner of the court with a basketball. Each team was to complete the following exercises in sequence accumulating to total.

    • 150 x Burpees

    • 300 x Squats

    • 150 x Big Boy Sit Ups

    • 300 x Air Presses

    • 150 x Merkins

    •  300 x Lunges

    Meanwhile, 1 member of each team backpedaled with their basketball to half court, performed a Bobby Hurley, and drove to goal for a shot of his choosing: layup (1 point if sunk), free throw (2 points if sunk), or three point shot (3 points if sunk). Shooters marked their points using the first letter of their F3 name with sidewalk chalk. The competition was to end when the first team completed all exercises and all members of the team planked on the sideline and yelled “Halt!”, but no team was finished by 0715, so QIC called it in respect of time.

    Total team points and individual team member points were tallied. The SW corner represented by Bird and Sparky had the most combined points (81).

    The highest scoring individual from each of the 4 teams were Bird, Stockboy, Toto, and Zoolander. The Final Four were summoned for a 5-shot “Around-the-World” shoot out, while the rest of the Pax lined the 3-point line performing side straddle hops (so as to simulate fans in the stands trying to distract the shooter). After the 4 rounds and sinking 3 of 5 shots, Zoolander emerged as the soon to be never remembered 2019 F3 Northshore Marsh Madness champion! We’ll see if the prestigious title can be defended in a year or so.

    Time was short, so the Pax of Elite 8 moseyed back to the meeting spot.

    Counterama, Nameorama. Welcome FNG Joel who sank 16 three pointers and is now known as Bird.

    QIC prayed us out. Thanks for following my lead today men. See you in the next Gloom.