F3 New Orleans

Tag: Lil’ Cuz

  • 80 Miles to Sante Fe – from Paradox

    What comes to mind when you think of the absolute cutting edge of human performance? Ultra marathons, Saturdiddles, special ops training, Cardinal crab walking … I’m talking the outer limits of human capabilities here. Well men I have a new challenging feat of strength to add to this pantheon of greatness. A rigorous 5 day crucible that tests the mind, body, spirit, and even Rouses endless supply of 100% juice capri suns.

    Some only live through it to tell the tale…
    That’s how I found myself shoulder to shoulder with Econoline this week at 8:15am on a casual Tuesday in the Chackbay Catholic center, awaiting our first rotation of children.
    There we stood at the game station like 2 young hobbits awaiting 10,000 orcs at Helms deep. (Jk jk your children are all angels )
    It was about to begin…
    The great battle of our time..
    Being group leaders at…
    VACATION BIBLE SCHOOL

    Duke put down that snack pack and roll the footage . It’s VBS week!

    Warmup
    The usuals with spikes of chatter with Tanas gigi arrival and Gooses wearing a crosscut necklace of cloth but mostly silent focus on preserving precious oxygen with furtive glances at YHCs entire cone collection in the big field being guarded by BAPs. Sooooon….

    To kickoff the shenanigans YHC explained the similarities between VBS stations and F3 and that we would train as group leaders today to get a taste of the action.

    Opening ceremony

    Needs to be high energy , get the blood pumping but also you need to run full speed backwards because you forgot your 2.0 shoes and he has not a care in the world of being barefoot in public.

    Indian run around the big loop with Nur to the front to take us to the Chimney.

    Game Station #1
    Hula Hoop Relay race

    Break into 3 teams
    1 team mate does hula hop to and around cone
    Rest of Team does 4 merkins, 4 sqats , 4 SSH , 4 BBSU (4x4x4x4 (tM)
    Until all complete and must slide the hula hoop down the line.
    Enron clearly ignored the PDF and instructional video YHC sent him about the 4x4x4x4 and he still had questions. Ya hate to see that from the self proclaimed smartest man in the room.
    In the end Team Goose took the title and gifted the losers with 25 monkey humpers, in an unrelated note we now cannot go within 100 feet of the St Joe carpool pickup line.

    To the tennis court

    Every great VBS must have catchy songs that get implanted into your brain and this week we talked with the kids a lot about listening to God for your call…

    Music Station #1
    “Call me maybe” by Carly Rae Jepsen
    1 Merkin on “maybe” and “baby “
    Holding plank in a circle of pax and Pass the Hula Hoop with hands and feet.
    if it’s on you during call me maybe then you do 3 merkins.
    The pax got pretty good at passing that hula at lightning speed and WetTap has even adopted this as his on call theme song.

    Arts and Crafts Station #1

    Another vital part of VBS is a crafting station and no craft session is complete without rock paper and scissors. Pax paired up for escalating rounds of Rochamburpee with 2 more burpees for the loser each round till we reached 12. Not sure how everyone faired here but it seemed like burpees were enjoyed by all.

    Mosey to the Thunder dome

    Music Station #2
    Over the past 2 years selecting “F3 songs” has become a cherished pastime at YHCs house. There’s no definitive criteria but you know a really good one when you hear it. YHC recently stumbled upon the #SWT (Ronnie would later figure out this was Songs With Triggers) channel of f3 slack and uncovered an absolute gem.
    I needed a song to represent this weeks teaching of finding a quiet place to pray and it just so happened that Dean Summerwind had provided directions to a quiet lake where we could park just 80 miles from Santa Fe.

    “Parked by the Lake “
    Dean Summerwind
    Hold Al Gore with
    Bonnie Blair’s on “Parked”
    Tin Soldiers on “Santa Fe”
    Squats on “Lake”

    I hope it met Popeyes high expectations. It will be added to my F3 Song Hall of Fame as Diddle proclaimed it both right and just.

    Game Station #2
    Duck- Duck Goose
    Pax plank up in a circle facing outward. One pax selects a “Goose” by running around and tapping them on the head while the pax knock out plank related exercises (Merkin, plank jacks, MCs)
    The real honker himself got us started and we had Some close battles here with the Dawson 2.0s showing some serious evasive maneuvers.

    Arts and craft Station #2
    – color our ABCs
    PAX on our six with legs up to spell out VACATION BIBLE SCHOOOL (those Os are just too fun)

    Mosey to big field and as we turned the corner BAPS was seen and one pax yelled “is Jeaux here?”
    A simple question but it nearly derailed me as I couldn’t shake the image of YJ crouched in his van with binoculars and 1980s spy equipment writing down notes and mumbling “I knew it” .
    I composed myself and we arrived safely at the Grand Finale.

    Every VBS ends with a grand finale Friday where you showcase everything you learned through the week. So YHC unveiled the ultimate VBS obstacle course
    We split into two teams started some SSH and each team let one pax into the race at a time until they got to the minefield.
    BAPS provided “the final countdown” and We raced through..

    1. Dizzy bat
    2. Lunges
    3. Merkin minefield with CrawlBears (5 merkins if you knock down a cone)
    4. Broad jump burpees
    5. Suicide Trifecta (Nur, Run, Carioca)
    We grabbed our ever growing pile of gear and moseyed back to the flag for people’s choice Mary to represent your kids showing you all the stuff they learned during the week.
    Dr Ws, Penguins, Fred Merk, fire hydrants , WW1 sit-ups with Yote till the buzzer.

    Count o Rama, NamoRama
    GiGi found a new home with Ronnie and the Animal went back to the Goose nest with concerns that Crosscut was on his last microfiber.

    COT with continued prayers for the St Pierre family
    Goose prayed us out

    NMM

    YHC has a special place in his heart for VBS. Growing up it was always the mark of deep summer and where the seeds of my faith were first planted. (It’s where I picked up a love for relay races and obstacle courses!)
    It’s also a great reminder to me to search for simple yet profound truths and to strive for a childlike faith. Grateful for the men of F3 as we help each other walk a straighter path.

    PPS (Pickleteria PostScript) sponsored by Joola

    Following the beatdown several Pax gathered at the thunderDome for the first ever Pickleteria . Tana and Dilly graciously provided the pickleGear and all the fixings for Americas fastest growing game. In a thrilling opening match Team Dawson narrowly took down Threat Level Midnight 11-2. Acting manager of TLM Ronnie Lillich was optimistic for the teams growth during the post match interview: “Dox has a floppy wrist, plain and simple,I was carrying him. His mind was boggled about the kitchen and he lost his composure”. Sounds like TLM is going through a “rebuilding year” but a lot of league experts say Dox had a dollar store paddle. Ya hate to pickle with that.
    Well , It’s safe to say that the pickle fever has spread rapidly and the only question left is ..same time next week?

    SYITG
    Dox

  • Ride the Horse (even if you’re doing it wrong) – from Paradiddle

    YHC has been tempted recently to move on from his usual loosely Ted Lasso themed beat downs, but the PAX have seemed to enjoy not knowing what will come from the mustached man – smiles, positive vibes, 50 too many burpees married to nonstop cardio? What could be in store for this beatdown…

    YHC arrived early (a rare sight) to find Sooth’s empty truck in the shell lot. After looking for Smooth for a few, YHC had some intel to gather. YHC mosey’d to ED White’s football stadium to get a good grasp on the scale of the field – he’d need to retreat one since the turf is still being replaced. Returning to the lot, YHC found some of the pax had begun to arrive – Enron, Lox, Smooth, Lil Cuz w/ 2.0. Conversation started as YHC had brought the newest FNG this morning – a prime day special that has expanded our JBL fam. With Dox’s arrival came cones, and with the help of Lox a makeshift 100 yd football field was created.

    Mumble chatter was strong and we began the usual warmups accompanied with the regular “How does this count off go again?” Debates were held about whether it’s “starting position” or “ready position” – some claiming to have done their F3 online research. SSH, Imperial Walkers, grass grabbers w the infamous clap, arm circles, cherry pickers, and mountain climbers.

    YHC introduced the legend of Leeroy Jenkins – a gamer who in 2005 singlehandedly caused the implosion of a well thought out WoW raid. Yelling Leeroy’s name today would earn the pax a 100yd sprint and 5 burpees. Every man could call upon Leeroy once in the beatdown if he so wished.

    We grabbed coupons and mosey’d to the field with Chicago serenading us and “Saturday in the Park” filling the air through the newest JBL member.

    YHC wasn’t finished explaining thang 1 before Coyote yelled the first Leeroy. The pax sprinted the length of the field and finished the burpees. We had to get back to our starting position, so it was an additional 100yd sprint back. It was immediately apparent that Leeroy might have been a mistake, as YHC had promised the pax a beatdown without much running. (I’ll admit – Leeroy was a last minute addition)

    _____

    Thang One
    Hindenburg
    An exercise on each of the four corners of the field, sprinting one corner to the next. YHC had five rounds planned, but in a last minute audible, reduced it to three.
    Round One – 5 Burps
    Some lovely soul called a Leeroy
    Round Two – 20 LBC’s
    Round Three – 30 Plank Jax
    Pax completed the Hindenburg with ease, but mumble chatter was filling the air and it was apparent that resentment towards YHC for the amount of running was on the rise. Before thang two, an additional Leeroy was called. Already up to three. Insanity. The pax was willingly engaging in MORE running and blaming YHC.

    _____

    Thang Two
    Death of the Merkin’
    This is a Diddle Original.
    You see, after Cardinal’s brutal Millennial on Thursday, Lox expressed his desire to expand his chest and his capacity for merkin’s, thus we would work on our merkins.

    We’d perform Manmaker Merkin’s (according to the Lexicon, but debated in name by Goose) – High plank with coupon (cinders are great) laying to your right side. Perform a Merkin. Reach under your body with your left hand and drag the coupon to the opposite side of your body.

    5 Manmaker Merkins on each 10 yd line, then a lunge walk with coupon to the next yd line, all the way to the 50. 25 in total, 50 yds coupon lunge in total. Pax pushed through, admittedly some pax tossing their coupons under their body with sheer frustration (downright impressive). Econoline pushed through and finished strong, not giving in to the temptation to walk instead of lunge (Hell yeah – you’d earn the animal shirt, I believe, because of your sheer will power in these moments – props)

    Pt. 2 of Death of the Merkin
    Pump Jack
    A partner pushup competition til failure – one partner performing 5 pushups while the other holds high plank and “coaches” the other. Upon failure, lunge walk around other pairs and coach them encouragingly until they reach failure.
    Pax performed these in cadence with YHC leading the count. No idea what we ended up getting to, but it was a higher number than YHC anticipated. Majority of the pax stayed in the fight all together the whole time. Props to Lil Cuz, the only person I could see (and partner), as he fought through the craziest case of arm trembles I’ve ever seen. The man didn’t stop, didn’t make a sound – WHAT! I believe someone called Leeroy here. What a move.

    It was here that my extremely loose theme came into play as Smooth asked if I had any Ted inspiration to bestow on the pax – I did! YHC had practiced for this moment, and yet still couldn’t remember it. Out came the trusty iPhone – “Taking on a challenge is a lot like riding a horse, if you’re comfortable while you’re doing it, you’re probably doing it wrong”. – Ted to Beard

    Thang Three
    Plank Hurdles
    This was YHC’s version of “fun” for the morning. A three team relay with the team starting in plank in the end zone, partner one runs to the 10 and planks, partner two emerges from plank and hurdles over partner 1 (like a gazelle) and planks up on the 20, partner three over partner one and two and lands on the 30…etc until everyone ends in the opposite end zone. This proved to be fun and challenging, with certain pax taking liberties with their form as it quickly became competitive. Gazelle award goes to America’s Best, with the best most consistent form in hurdles AND lunges.
    Somewhere here Leeroy Jenkins was called. We were dead, but we ran it.
    After Leeroy, we returned for a second face-off of plank hurdles. Thank you Linkin Park for accurately describing our feelings as we planked up again.

    Following was one of the slowest mosey’s with coupons back to the shovel and flag. I’ve never seen the pax move that slow – I’ve never seen myself move that slow. I couldn’t make the legs move any faster.

    Pax circled up around the flag, exhausted, moist (so so so moist), and ready for shade that was nowhere to be found. COT and prayer led by Goose.

    Men, great work. This pax has not stopped pushing. We are growing. And for some reason, you chose the Diddle Death March (disguised as Leeroy Jenkins) all on your own on this lovely Saturdiddle (props to Dox to coining the phrase).

    Til the next time,

    SYITG.
    Paradiddle

  • July 4 America USA – from Goose

    YHC and Pope rolled up a little earlier than usual this Independence Day morning, hopeful that the day off of work would mean a bigger crowd than usual for Tuesday Tuff, and this PAX did not disappoint. Smooth and Michelin were already there at 5:00am, but Pope and I were still able to sneak over to the bumper area to set up some cones without anyone noticing. By 5:15, there were 12 strong ready for a patriotic sweat fest.

    Yankee had pulled off the perfect EH by picking up an FNG, the would-be Honeysuckle. We can all learn from this–it’s much harder to fartsack when someone’s sitting in your driveway. (Maybe that’s what we need to do for some of these “hc” specialists.)

    The warmup was frought with mumblechatter and unnecessary exercise explanations (YHC though it important to go into the details of how to execute the complex “high knees” exercise–I almost pulled out YouTube for some demonstration videos).

    We then moseyed to the bumper, YHC carrying BAPS into his first ever Bleep test performance. Once the PAX saw the cones, dread spread quickly. There were only a few who didn’t know what they meant, who hadn’t yet experienced YHC’s fascination with the layers of mental and physical dynamics at work within the Bleep test. This morning, YHC connected it to our celebration of the birth of our nation by pointing out that the defining moments, the heroic and selfless acts that have become the cornerstones of our identity as a nation would not have happened, would not have been possible without countless Americans pushing through countless unrecognized and seemingly meaningless difficulties, day in and day out. The bleep test is just a 20 meter (65-ish American feet) run, done over and over. That’s it. You just gotta decide to turn around and do it again, especially when you really don’t want to. And, the only reason we do this is because the man beside us, who we care about is doing it, because we want to get better together, because we want to be a part of something bigger than us, something meaningful that was earned through shared suffering. And so, we did. Nobody earned a medal (no participation trophies or rewards for softball music trivia), we just decided to keep doing another lap. And, if you didn’t make it before the beep, you stepped off to the side to plank up or complete 20 merkins to buy your way back in. Why? Because that’s where your brothers are suffering, and there’s no better place to be!

    YHC usually lets Paradiddle and Pope push him to the limits to be the last man standing, but this morning, having heard that the FNG was an ultra-marathon runner, YHC made a subconscious decision that if it ended up being him and me left at the end, that I would go no further, as long as the previous record of 70 lengths was broken. And, that’s exactly what happened. Paradox and Pope pushed farther than they have in the past, even without Paradiddle, but they dropped off somewhere in the high 60’s, which left YHC with Honeysuckle moving into #75. And, though I wondered how much he had in him, how well distance training translated into shuttle running, I was too winded to actually care and pulled up short before finishing #76. Honeysuckle was gonna keep going had YHC not called it, and though I was curious to see how long he could have gone, he seemed to appreciate the break.

    After moseying back to the flag, we circled up for song #1. BAPS lit us up with Ray Charles’s rendition of “America the Beautiful”. We held Al Gore for the duration and did Bobby Hurleys for every “America” and every old English words (“thee”, “thine”).

    Song #2 was the Armed Forces medley, which gave us the opportunity to work the core in a variety of ways. During the Marines portion, we did flutter kicks, Navy = boat/canoe, Army = American Hammers, Coast Guard = Scuba Steves, and Air Force = gas pumps.

    After this, YHC had a general idea for how we could focus on America’s unique sense of humor exemplified by the origin of the song “Yankee Doodle” and how it became a sort of theme song for the Americans during the Revolutionary War (look it up)–basically, we Americans are proud, but we’re good at not taking ourselves too seriously.
    I think it took more time for YHC to explain the story and then the routine (counting off, counting off within the count-off, naming teams and then teams within the teams, demonstrating the exercises, redirecting Yankee Joe) than it did to actually do the routine. I mean, it was a little challenging, a little fun to watch people try to Grouch-walk quickly, but ultimately, it was too complicated, and we ultimately scrapped it in order to get back to the flag in time.
    The routine was four corners on the sidewalk track: 1. Wacky Jacks, 2. Goofballs, 3. Miami Nighclubs (Moroccans with a step back and to the side), 4. Air Presses. The first member of the team would Groucho walk to the next corner while all members performed the exercise of their corner until they were relieved by a teammate Groucho walking toward them. It was supposed to look ridiculous, which it did, but most were lost in the endless explanations and directives given throughout. I hope at least the passing cars got a kick out of it.

    At 5:58, we had to rush back to the flag for the Star Spangled Banner–we laid on our sixes and held our feet six inches off the ground for the duration of Whitney Houston singing it live with a big band. Unfortunately, though, the drama and emotion were drowned out by the pain in the lower abdominal region, and it went the route of most songs used in F3–categorized under “hatred” and “PTSD”–especially given how long she held out “…braaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaave!”

    COT and the FNG became Honeysuckle thanks to Econoline’s immediate wit, which made the PAX wonder if he’s been sandbagging this whole time–nobody has that much brain function at the end of a beatdown these days.
    Announcements including Goldilocks’s upcoming VQ, and Paradox prayed us out.

    SYTIG,
    Goose

  • It’s Gonna Be a Good Day – from Paradiddle

    YHC has recently felt the fire within and has been trying to recruit new pax to join this lovely cult that we call a club (both F3 and WHOOOPgang). You see, today was supposed to be a big day for one of our own. After a Friday evening prethang with Goldilocks, as we prepared our bodies (and thighs) to be sculpted into the most beautiful figures mankind could ever lay eyes on – thanks to YankeeJoe, Goldilocks, after a little peer pressure from YHC, agreed to VQ today. After a small but strong showing on Saturday, YankeeJoe had me convinced that all of the pax were out of town on the beach, pina-colada with tiny umbrella in hand. YHC was merely looking out for Goldilocks (locks, or is it lox?) by wanting a strong showing at his VQ. Locks agreed, even seeming excited to have a bit more time to prepare for the chaos he wishes to unleash upon us all this coming Thursday.

    YHC arrived with two minutes to spare (impressive, right?) to find a full showing of pax, coupons already unloaded, cheeks clenched, and mumble chatter strong. YHC was happy, and with a big smile, we began.

    Warmups were the usual not knowing how to count off anything in cadence and consisted of:
    – SSH
    – Imperial Walkers
    – Grass Grabbers (w/ the clap)
    – Open the Gates (bringing something new)

    Mumble chatter was strong and YHC was so distracted that he nearly just got right in to the beatdown. Thanks to Lil’ Cuz piping up, we actually stretched our arms (and we needed to):
    – Arm circles
    – Cherry pickers

    THANG ONE
    – Indian run w/ 3 caboose burpees
    DJ DOX was quick to be ready with ever faithful JBL, and YHC just about put him in the grave when the decision to run in silence was announced to the pax. Sometimes you just have to be alone with those inner demons and face them head on. The pace was set and kept for the run with the exception of the ever popular Cardinal-pace. We stopped midway back to the stage for a group circle of 30 Bonnie Blair’s so that we could get a bonus burn in the thighs.

    THANG TWO
    – Step Up’s & LBC’s w/ Coupons
    YHC’s current favorite tv character, Mr. Ted Lasso, has a way with people. His positivity is contagious, and many of his colleagues are often annoyed with his upbeat nature and attitude. I feel similar to Ted here. Some of the pax like to acknowledge my smile when running the Diddle Death March and other popular exercises. After my dear Ted got put down in GroupMe last night (not gonna name names *honk*), I was inspired with this routine.

    The song was “Good Day” by Nappy Roots – a real bop , frfr. We would do lbc’s with coupons on the verses and step up’s on the chorus for the duration of the song. This was sure to get the pax in a great mood this morning! We can make the decision to make it a good day from the moment we sit up in bed (lbc’s) and take our first steps of the day (step up’s).

    Mumble chatter and grunts were at a minimum, but Cuz did set the record for the most amount of bird poop anyone has laid in.

    THANG THREE
    – Merkin Mountain
    After Yankee Joe’s inspirational sharty beatdown on Saturday, YHC might have a new favorite exercise – the Merkin Mountain. YHC adapted this gem into what I’m now calling the Merkin Flatlands (which might just be tougher than the mountain – Dox I repent of saying this would be easier, I was wrong).

    We would begin with one merkin, take one step(?) in a bear crawl, two merkins, two steps in bear crawl , three merkins, three steps in bear crawl, etc until we reached 18 merkins (thanks to Cuz who remembered how many the mountain had, but im pretty sure he remembered because he got to the top right behind shari’ah and stomped the rest of us).

    This…proved to be difficult. After hearing Econoline’s thunderous grunts from afar, YHc had to pivot and reduce the mountain to 15 merkins. Those 51 pushups really would have ate our lunch.

    THANG FOUR
    – Dora
    – 100 overhead press w/ coupon
    – Partner runs a lap
    – 200 Bonnie Blair’s
    – Partner Murder Bunny’s to the second picnic table & back
    – 300 Squats
    – Partner does mountain climber’s til he tags out and swaps

    The pax plowed through the over head press and running portion, and YHC was downright inspired by Smooth making that coupon look like he was lifting a box of Kleenex above his head.

    Goose, to no surprise after May’s ISI challenge, set the pace with the Bonnie Blair’s. This is where things got challenging. Murder Bunnies are rightly named, and the pairing with Bonnie Blair’s should have had them named something even more sinister. YHC was grateful for Pope absolutely destroying the majority of our 200.

    We timed out during the 300 squats so that we could get 60sec of Mary in.

    Leg raises and flutter kicks took us out.

    *I remain ever grateful for men that continue to push one another in their fitness and their virtue. It is not lost on me that most beatdowns go by and no one complains, no one grumbles, no one brings the spirit down. This is one of the first things that made me stick around F3. I know it is a part of our culture here in F3 Thib, and we would make Ted proud.*

    “Futbol (F3) is life!” – Dani Rojas

    SYITG,
    Paradiddle

  • Gonna Have a Good Day – from Paradiddle

    YHC has recently felt the fire within and has been trying to recruit new pax to join this lovely cult that we call a club (both F3 and WHOOOPgang). You see, today was supposed to be a big day for one of our own. After a Friday evening prethang with Goldilocks, as we prepared our bodies (and thighs) to be sculpted into the most beautiful figures mankind could ever lay eyes on – thanks to YankeeJoe, Goldilocks, after a little peer pressure from YHC, agreed to VQ today. After a small but strong showing on Saturday, YankeeJoe had me convinced that all of the pax were out of town on the beach, pina-colada with tiny umbrella in hand. YHC was merely looking out for Goldilocks (locks, or is it lox?) by wanting a strong showing at his VQ. Locks agreed, even seeming excited to have a bit more time to prepare for the chaos he wishes to unleash upon us all this coming Thursday.

    YHC arrived with two minutes to spare (impressive, right?) to find a full showing of pax, coupons already unloaded, cheeks clenched, and mumble chatter strong. YHC was happy, and with a big smile, we began.

    Warmups were the usual not knowing how to count off anything in cadence and consisted of:
    – SSH
    – Imperial Walkers
    – Grass Grabbers (w/ the clap)
    – Open the Gates (bringing something new)

    Mumble chatter was strong and YHC was so distracted that he nearly just got right in to the beatdown. Thanks to Lil’ Cuz piping up, we actually stretched our arms (and we needed to):
    – Arm circles
    – Cherry pickers

    THANG ONE
    – Indian run w/ 3 caboose burpees
    DJ DOX was quick to be ready with ever faithful JBL, and YHC just about put him in the grave when the decision to run in silence was announced to the pax. Sometimes you just have to be alone with those inner demons and face them head on. The pace was set and kept for the run with the exception of the ever popular Cardinal-pace. We stopped midway back to the stage for a group circle of 30 Bonnie Blair’s so that we could get a bonus burn in the thighs.

    THANG TWO
    – Step Up’s & LBC’s w/ Coupons
    YHC’s current favorite tv character, Mr. Ted Lasso, has a way with people. His positivity is contagious, and many of his colleagues are often annoyed with his upbeat nature and attitude. I feel similar to Ted here. Some of the pax like to acknowledge my smile when running the Diddle Death March and other popular exercises. After my dear Ted got put down in GroupMe last night (not gonna name names *honk*), I was inspired with this routine.

    The song was “Good Day” by Nappy Roots – a real bop , frfr. We would do lbc’s with coupons on the verses and step up’s on the chorus for the duration of the song. This was sure to get the pax in a great mood this morning! We can make the decision to make it a good day from the moment we sit up in bed (lbc’s) and take our first steps of the day (step up’s).

    Mumble chatter and grunts were at a minimum, but Cuz did set the record for the most amount of bird poop anyone has laid in.

    THANG THREE
    – Merkin Mountain
    After Yankee Joe’s inspirational sharty beatdown on Saturday, YHC might have a new favorite exercise – the Merkin Mountain. YHC adapted this gem into what I’m now calling the Merkin Flatlands (which might just be tougher than the mountain – Dox I repent of saying this would be easier, I was wrong).

    We would begin with one merkin, take one step(?) in a bear crawl, two merkins, two steps in bear crawl , three merkins, three steps in bear crawl, etc until we reached 18 merkins (thanks to Cuz who remembered how many the mountain had, but im pretty sure he remembered because he got to the top right behind shari’ah and stomped the rest of us).

    This…proved to be difficult. After hearing Econoline’s thunderous grunts from afar, YHc had to pivot and reduce the mountain to 15 merkins. Those 51 pushups really would have ate our lunch.

    THANG FOUR
    – Dora
    – 100 overhead press w/ coupon
    – Partner runs a lap
    – 200 Bonnie Blair’s
    – Partner Murder Bunny’s to the second picnic table & back
    – 300 Squats
    – Partner does mountain climber’s til he tags out and swaps

    The pax plowed through the over head press and running portion, and YHC was downright inspired by Smooth making that coupon look like he was lifting a box of Kleenex above his head.

    Goose, to no surprise after May’s ISI challenge, set the pace with the Bonnie Blair’s. This is where things got challenging. Murder Bunnies are rightly named, and the pairing with Bonnie Blair’s should have had them named something even more sinister. YHC was grateful for Pope absolutely destroying the majority of our 200.

    We timed out during the 300 squats so that we could get 60sec of Mary in.

    Leg raises and flutter kicks took us out.

    *I remain ever grateful for men that continue to push one another in their fitness and their virtue. It is not lost on me that most beatdowns go by and no one complains, no one grumbles, no one brings the spirit down. This is one of the first things that made me stick around F3. I know it is a part of our culture here in F3 Thib, and we would make Ted proud.*

    “Futbol (F3) is life!” – Dani Rojas

    SYITG,
    Paradiddle

  • Get Sharty – from Yankee Joe

    YHC arrived at The Peltch with high hopes of a large PAX. Sure, I only sent out five pre-hypes and sure, nobody actually HC’d. That said, nobody said they WEREN’T posting. Nobody said, “Hey, I know you are going to spend hours putting together a beatdown, and I hate to miss it, but we’re heading out of town.” As Montana would say from his vacay on the beach right now, “ya hate to see it.” I assume he’s at the beach. I have no idea.

    In planning the beatdown, I didn’t want to sell the PAX SHORT. I worked hard to ensure SHORTness of breath so that mumblechatter would be in SHORT supply. Though many of the PAX are under six feet, we make up for our SHORT stature in other ways. After seeing Goose’s seven inch vents and 3 inch inseams on his SHORTS the other day, I knew what had to be done. I couldn’t guarantee someone wouldn’t have an accident and SHART themselves, but today is all about the SHORT SHORTS or wet sharts depending on who you ask. The beatdown would celebrate four icons of short shorts.

    As I was saying, with my short shorts all up in a twist, YHC was excited to ultimately welcome five other PAX. With Paradiddle and Goldilox keeping up their posting streak and Paradox rolling in with some turquoise peeking out of his collar, the forecast looked bright. Lil’ Cuz sauntered in, but apparently couldn’t convince his M to loan him some shorts. His 10” inseams were a bit awkward. YHC was really looking forward to those pearly white legs.

    Most importantly, YHC was expecting an FNG. A former student and helluva beast first baseman for Nicholls (keep in mind, Nicholls beat the current College World Series champions this year), YHC was excited to have him in the mix. He emerged on the other end in much better condition than the rest of us, along with the new name, Shart’eh. He’s Canadian. He likes to say, “eh.” You put the rest together.

    We had 40 penalty burpees already on the books. The PAX had three trivia questions worth burpee deductions to be decided in fully transparent and biased fashion by the Q.

    Warmarama

    Side straddle hops
    Windmills
    Arm circles forward
    Arm circles backward
    Cherry pickers
    Self love
    High knees
    Mountain climbers

    Thang 1: Shartin’ to the Oldies

    Trivia #1: Where is Richard Simmons originally from?

    Answer: New Orleans (nobody got it)

    Song: Short shorts (The Royal Teens) – In high plank, 2 Groiners on “short shorts”; Shoulder taps during rest

    Plank Fonda X 15 each side (Jane Fonda’s in high plank with full arm extension)
    These were really hard. YHC is adding them to every beatdown moving forward.

    Star jacks X 15 IC

    Patty cake merkins w/ partner X 15 (P1 and P2 in merkin position facing each other. Merkin in sync, slap opposite hands at top of merkin…like patty cake.

    Transport: Mosey to ED White bleachers listening to “In Da Club”

    ——————————————————————————————————–
    Thang 2: If He Dies, He Dies

    Trivia #2: In 1975, Chuck Wepner fought Muhammad Ali for the heavyweight championship. Wepner was not expected to last more than a few rounds. Wepner even knocked Ali down in a near KO. Wepner eventually got TKO’d in the 15th round. A young screenwriter was sitting in the crowd that day and subsequently, wrote the plot to his movie idea in three and half days. Who was he?

    Answers: Slyvester Stallone (Lil’ Cus saved the day)

    To celebrate the Rocky franchise, but most importantly, the movie that saved America from communism, Rocky IV, the PAX laid into two new challenges. Of course, we listened to the traditional Rocky songs, including the Rocky IV training montage. As Paradox noted, the “only training montage.”

    Lunge Mountain

    Start at the base of the bleachers and lunge up each bleacher row. On top of each bleacher, do ascending air squats. There were 20 bleacher benches, thus 20 incline lunges and 210 squats. Not that it needs to be mentioned, but Goldilox is not a man, he’s a machine. See what I did there?

    Merkin Mountain

    Start in an incline Merkin at the base of any stadium bleacher. Perform 1 merkin and climb (preferably bear crawl) until your feet are where your hands started. Perform 2 Merkins and repeat adding one Merkin for every level you go up until you reach the pinnacle. There were 19 bleacher benches, thus 190 merkins.

    The FNG methodically pulled away from the PAX seemingly not breaking a sweat. Lil’ Cuz was right on his tail. Everyone fought through the insanity of this one. I think I heard Cuz say something like, “Every champion was once a contender who refused to give up.”

    Transport: Mosey to softball fields, picking bricks up along the way – Song: “I Know You Want Me” by Peetbool

    —————————————————————————————————————-
    Thang 3: Birds of a Feather (or heatstroke)

    Trivia #3: I’m a 3X NBA champion, 3X NBA MVP in three consecutive years, 12X all-star, I went to Indiana State and in 1979, we lost the national championship, which was the first meeting of many between me and Magic Johnson. Who am I? (Larry Bird) Who did I play for? (Celtics) What was my number? (33)

    The FNG got this one right out the gates and saved the PAX from burpees. And the fact that YC forgot about them altogether.

    Also, earlier at the end of Warmarama, Paradox revealed that he was wearing our ‘ol girl, GiGi. However, it was at this point that he revealed one of his greatest moments. He dropped his shorts to reveal 3” inseam shorts, black with pink piping. The beatdown nearly derailed. I was sure that our FNG would say. “Welp, I’m outta here,” but no, but Paradox said, “If I can change and you can change, everybody can change.” Or maybe he said, “If he dies, he dies.” I have no idea…I couldn’t stop looking at the shorts.

    Webbicides

    If you’ve ever been part of a basketball practice, you most likely finished with free throws and team sprints for every miss. We didn’t do any free throws, but we did do 80 yard suicides (10 yard increments). A standard suicide but instead of touching each line the pax does an increasing number of Bobby Hurleys at each line. Run to the first line, do one BH, run back to start, run to the next line, do two BH’s, and so on until you get to 8.

    This one was a beast as well and took longer than YHC had planned. There were supposed to be two rounds, but after a continuous seven minute suicide, YHC had to move on. Paradiddle showed that endurance that only comes with 7 point strains while the rest of us are posting 14+ (it’s a Whoop thing, you wouldn’t understand).

    ———————————————————————————————————————
    Thang 4: The ‘Ol Coach Got Balls

    In this last exercise, YHC shared some items from his personal life…

    You see, YHC moved to Florida with his Dad when he was in elementary school. He happened to play little league with Florida Governor, Ron DeSantis. In fact, we were born two weeks apart. You could say we’ve been on similar life tracks.

    For example,

    – He’s a graduate of Yale where he was the captain of a Division I baseball team. I sometimes started for a D3 team that won 4 games. So, same.

    – Then got his law degree from Harvard. Big deal…I went to Lynchburg, Va and taught Spanish grammar to 9th graders and coached JV soccer. Same again.

    – He then was a commissioned officer in the Navy. Big whoop…during the same time, I ran a half marathon. Same, same, same.

    – He was elected to the House of Representatives and then Governor of Florida. Child’s play…during the same time, I qualified for a high interest loan to finance my truck. It’s like we’re the same person.

    – He recently announced his bid to run for President of the United States. Me? Well, I traded in that truck for a minivan and then tried to kill it by driving it into a concrete crevasse. Also, Poor guy. He must have fallen in with a bad crowd.

    Butttt…that’s not the Thang….

    One of those years, maybe 7th grade, Gov Ron and I played on the same little league team. On the first day of practice, we gathered in the parking lot outside of the Dunedin National Little League fields. We all sat down. Coach was wearing the good ‘ol polyester short short coaching shorts. They were short. Coach squatted down. As a 12 year old, I wasn’t sure what was happening, but polyester, the amazing apparel innovation that it is, can only hold so much and well…one ball slooowlyyy popped out the side. We were silent. He was silent. We were silent. He stood up and rearranged himself. We moved on.

    So, we will move on too… but not before always checking ourselves a few times to make sure all baggage is properly stored in the above compartment.

    The ‘Ol Triple check

    Teams of three. First man holds in freestyle peoples chair (knees together in seat position, no wall), arms straight up, second man in front of him doing Bonnies Blair’s, third man sprints 80 yards and back with bricks, rinse and repeat until time. We aimed for nine runs…each man cycling through three times. We succeeded, finishing by 7:29:58. The men REALLY pushed themselves here, especially on the brick sprints. In fact, it seemed like they were only getting faster.

    COT, GiGi was bestowed upon the Diddle. Our FNG was named.

    Lil’ Cuz prayed us out.

    Safe travels to everyone this weekend.

    SYITG,

    Yankee Jeaux

  • The Happiest Animal in the World – from Paradiddle

    After getting the initial nerves out of the system from his VQ, YHC was determined to have a bit more fun with his second Q. He was feeling free, and after seeing the hustle of the pax from May’s ISI challenge, he knew everyone could dig a bit deeper than they give themselves credit for.

    YHC has recently been inspired by the mustache’d man from Kansas who found himself coaching the struggling AFC Richmond UK football team. Now, let no one be fooled, YHC knows next to nothing about football (and US football), but Ted Lasso has been a source of inspiration and joy. The “Lasso Way” is a controversial way that Ted coaches the team by seeking to help the players grow both on and off the field. One immediately sees the growth of certain characters, such as Roy Kent and Jamie Tart, who both go from egotistical bad mama jama’s to virtuous men and best friends. It’s not frequent that you see truly good men on television. But Ted Lasso illuminates the goodness in each of these men as they truly are the iron that sharpens each other. This would be YHC’s inspiration for the beatdown.

    YHC woke early, left on time, and even managed to pick up a fun old sorta new guy, Goldlocks, for the beatdown. Arriving ten minutes early, YHC found Smooth awake from his post-work slumber, Enron fishing for hints on what the beatdown might be, and Wet Tap, who came in clutch with the perfect dry erase board needed for the exercises (YHC was going to resort to cardboard and a sharpie). After preparing the board, YHC did his own pre-thang (not by choice) to deliver the goods to the ED White track, which was under construction, but YHC might have completely missed that due to his extra excitement for the morning (the introvert was feeling extroverted this morning).

    Returning to the Pelch, YHC found the rest of the pax assembled, mumble chatter was strong, and debates of who was on “the Diddle List” filled the air. Warmup consisted of the usual SSH, some thing I can’t remember, arm circles, pickers, mtn climbers, and high knees. YHC still has a good bit of learning to do, as every exercise started with a different variation of “Exercise, ready, move, in cadence, exercise…start.” We’ll get the kinks worked out soon.

    The pax moseyed the stadium where one set of stadiums were part of an extended warmup. Goose and Goldilocks were excited for the fresh challenge, while YJ held down the back of the train, his chatter weighing him down (the complaining kept a grin on YHC’s face).

    THANG 1
    YHC gathered the pax on the track where he asked an important question – What is the happiest animal in the world? A goldfish. Why? Well, because they have a 10second memory. (All information comes purely from YHC watching Ted Lasso and not actual research) YHC then, in his own introverted super brief storytelling way, tried to explain to the pax how Roy helps Jamie to grow as a soccer player by consistency showing up at his house everyday at 4am for them to run together. The pax both knew and feared where this was going. YHC revealed the board of doom with thang 1 bulleted.

    AMRAP – 25min
    – 1/4 mile run (1 lap around the track)
    – 15 declined push ups
    – 10 Mountain Climbers (2 is 1)
    – 10 Groiner w/ Flying V
    – 10 Peter Parker’s
    – 10 V Up’s
    – 10 Bonnie Blair’s
    – 10 Step Up’s

    Due to the field being cleared of benches, YHC nixed the step up’s and everyone began. The pax only made it 1.5 times through the list before a real life Colossus XXL (Cars 2, people) made its way on to the track. YHC called an audible and with the help of Goose, relocated inside the Peltch. The pax grinded out what must have been 5-7 laps of the exercise (most of it while being serenaded by MC Hammer’s 2 Legit 2 Quit – DJ Dox must have really liked that one). 25 solid minutes of Zone 4 by every pax. The shirts were off, the sweat was pouring, Dox’s back had more grass stuck to it than a farm growing St. Aug. Smooth’s classic “next” moved us to our next activity.

    THANG 2
    Burpee Sprints
    To keep with tradition, burpee sprints are typically 10 burpees followed by sprinting the length of a football field (100 burps & 10 fields total). If only we had a football field… YHC picked the tree that resided behind the Dawson house for YJ’s Christmas Classic as the end of the field. The pax took off, and soon YHC realized, not for the sake of the pax, but for the sake of time, that a full set of burpee sprints wouldn’t be possible. Audible two was called and we counted down each set (10, 9, 8, etc til 1). A few chirps from Lil’ Cuz during the runs made YHC smile, but otherwise the pax were a silent bunch this morning for some reason. Oh no! What’s that? Is it a rustling in the distance?! No – it’s Yankee, on his six in pain. His back struck again (we really need to get Heath on speed dial – YHC is sorry for your back, and I really hope it gets better soon). The pax finished strong – at least five shirts off, and we finished as a team. The F3 motto “Leave no man behind, but leave no man where you find him” rang true on this hot Saturday morning.

    We moseyed back to the flag and for a 40 second round of Mary we each breathed independently. It was needed. Name-o-rama and Tana prayed us out (I think).

    What a morning. I’m constantly inspired by a group of men that don’t complain, always push harder, and who are growing stronger every beatdown. I know that just the last two months have pushed me harder and made me stronger than I have probably ever been. It is because of the accountability of showing up and walking next to this group of men who pray and play together. You each put in the work. You each push past the point of comfort for the betterment of yourselves and your families. We do this for more than ourselves. The pain is temporary – go one more.

    – Diddle

  • Fubar – from Goose

    FUBAR.
    It’s a term you may have heard if you, like me, have spent part of your Memorial Day weekend watching Spielberg’s great film where Captain Miller leads his men behind enemy lines to rescue Private James Ryan. The entire mission is classified as Fubar from the very beginning from the men, but they learn that only with the strength of one another and trusting the lead of their Captain will they successfully complete their mission. Today Being Memorial Day, it was only right that we should suffer a little bit more than usual to pay our respects for the men and women that have served our country so bravely by giving their life. This was the very reason Private Ryan needed to be rescued – because his brothers had given their very lives for the sake of their country.

    _____

    YHC barely arrived on time to find 9 PAX already at the Stage with coupons arranged in the most organized fashion. Warmups consisted of SSH, windmills, and high knees. Before YHC could complete warmups, Cardinal arrived carrying some speed in his Vandebilt blue speed wagon. Warmpus finished with butt kicks, and mountain climbers.

    Thang 1
    – Partner Bropee Mile Indian Run w/ Bonnie Blair’s –
    YHC’s list of strengths might be running and cardio, but giving clear directions definitely did not make the list. The PAX partnered up and completed 5 Bonnie Blair’s before racing to the front of the partner Indian line, stopping every 1/4 mile and completing some Bropees (a burpee completed alongside your parter ending in a high ten at the top of the squat jump). YHC had the Pax breathing hard, and by the time the group reached the half mile mark, the sounds of some old animal filled the quiet of the early morning. The only thing to distract from the animalistic breathing sounds were the welcome butt slaps from those running to the front of the line. In total, 28 bropees were completed.

    Thang 2
    – Ascending Testicles & Coupon Lunges –
    YHC’s thorough reading of the Exicon introduced the PAX to a few new exercises – one of them being Ascending Testicles (a cousin of balls to the wall – declined merkins that progressively have a more extreme angle). The Pax would complete 10 merkins on ground level, 10 declined merkins on the bench part of a picnic table, and 10 declined merkins from the table part of a picnic table, followed by lunging with a coupon to a different picnic bench across the pitch. This would complete one set. Ultimate VQ hype man/DJ extraordinaire POO-X came to the rescue by providing tunes to motivate everyone to push through the rush of blood to their brains. In total three sets were completed, leaving time for the final thang.

    Thang 3
    – Butkus + Lion King + a lil’ jog –
    Heart rates were resting in a steady zone 3, so a ten count was in order (YHC has no recollection of who let two 10 counts, because at this point, his mind was complete fubar). Another jumble of instructions from YHC proved to confuse the Pax. Perhaps it was the terrible instructions, or perhaps it was the mumble chatter coming from the marketing trio of Tana, Horn, and Joe, but YHC had to pipe up, let those furballs descend, and use an “outside” voice to finish explaining butkus (rapid step ups on a curb for at least a minute) and Lion King (low squat into a thruster with a coupon). Much to YHC’s surprise, the pax crushed three sets of 1min Butkus, 1min Lion King, and a lap around the pitch. Smooth was locked in pretending that coupon was one of his rugrats, and Horn couldn’t control his strength and began his streak of crushing coupons with his bare hands.

    The morning ended with two minutes of Mary – Freddie Mercury’s, leg raises, and probably something else – but YHC’s mind was indeed fubar by this point and thus no new memories were able to be made.

    6:00am arrived sooner than YHC anticipated, and it proved to be bittersweet. The nerves from the VQ were gone, and only laughs and sweat were to behold. Hopes of 13.0 strain filled the air, and YHC found himself basking in those good good endorphins that only F3 Thibodaux can produce.

    __________

    So, the Memorial Day beatdown mission turned out not to be fubar, but instead a witness and sacrifice in thanksgiving for the lives of those gone before us by giving their life. I remain humbled, grateful, and surprised but the continual growth of the men that continue to show up, put out, and suffer much to make themselves and those around them better.

    – Paradiddle

  • F4 by Pope – from Goose

    If YHC learned anything today, it is that improv is an essential skill in many different scenarios in life; F3 is certainly no exception.
    First, there were the signs… very oddly placed STADIUM CLOSED signs contradicting the wide-open gates from which they hung. And the padlock on the gates behind the goalpost, also open.
    YHC began to worry, since a major part of the thang consisted of material requiring hash marks, then relaxed a bit when Cardinal showed up.
    Then Cardinal dropped the bomb on YHC that the stadium was actually closed this time.
    Not only that, but the field beside Bayou Road was dominated by peewee baseball fence.
    YHC also learned (and please store this in your memory—could come in handy if you get into a similar pickle) that the Chimney is a very versatile backup location.
    YHC began the beatdown revolving around the sport that Yankee Joe had yet to theme—not futbol, not America’s mere pastime of baseball, but America’s sport—with the usual warmups (SSH, windmills, SL, etc.) and debuted A-skips to the warmup arsenal.
    After completing windmills, the gloom was pierced by Paradox’s cry of “Keep it midnight!” and on that somewhat foreboding cue, Dox, Lil Cuz, Piccadilly and Enron pulled off their shirts and blinded the bewildered PAX with neon shirts with the sleeves apparently cut and/or torn off, decorated by the stenciled abbreviation TLM along with the wearer’s name on the back. Dox outdid himself when he and his neon minions donned similarly colored headbands stenciled with #KIP. YHC overcame the shock with great struggle and continued warmups…
    The PAX moseyed to the Chimney and very easily separated into teams: the Midnight Owls (and Enron’s 2.0 FNG Harrison) against all—YHC, Goose, Cardinal, French Horn and Coyote. YHC determined the boundaries and initiated a game of football—football according to Tom Cruise and the Top Gun: Maverick crew. This version of the game (first of all, was originally planned for the Bayou Rd. field) consisted of two footballs, two quarterbacks on the field at one time, and all PAX playing offense and defense at the same time.
    The balls were placed after each play on the spot where the ballcarrier who had gained more yards was stopped, and according to which side of the field in which the line of scrimmage was, the team defending it did 5 8-ct body-builders while the opposing team performed 5 big boys (YHC thinks he should have stressed the need to keep track of May Challenge exercises a good bit more; if you haven’t already calculated that, have fun). If a team scored, they were assigned 10 star-jumps, with the defeated, shamed defense doing 10 burpees. In the case of both teams scoring, all PAX did 25 merkins.
    Ultimately, the neon-green dark of midnight was overcome by Team Morning Light by a score of 6-4. Highlight of the game: YHC dropped back to pass and noticed Piccadilly sprinting up the field with their ball. YHC rolled to the right and tagged Dilly with his left hand and the ball, then turned on the jets and ran beyond the line of scrimmage. YHC planted his foot and cut right to avoid Paradox, then lateralled to Goose—a pass that fell far behind Goose, who couldn’t even touch it as it fell to the ground and was recovered by Enron. YHC then decided to be a jerk and call the game. Hey, it was five minutes past the previously determined end time anyway!
    Knowing that most of the PAX hadn’t thrown a ball yet today and had untested throwing arms, YHC circled up the PAX and began a game of throw-&-catch, during which one would catch the oncoming ball, pass it to another PAX, then drop for a couple of burpees—three if he dropped the pass and picked it up to throw it.
    Next Goose and Coyote fell back from the PAX and waited for the first two contestants of the longest-throw elimination-style contest. Two PAX attempted to throw the football farther than the other, the winner choosing a May Challenge exercise and the number of reps to do while the loser did 15 merkins and 15 big boys (yet another accidental complication in the tracking of reps). YHC was victorious in the cannon-arm contest. Next the PAX competed for the longest punt, the contest consisting of the same mechanics. However, having witnessed Goose’s thunderous punts while returning thrown balls to the PAX, the competition was really for second place, a title won by Piccadilly.
    Returning to the flag with the rest of the PAX, YHC observed the unfortunate fact that most of the time spent at the Chimney was spent standing around, either in the huddle or waiting for one’s turn to throw/punt. With that in mind, YHC was determined to add the initially aimed-for grind of the beatdown via Mary. After leading the PAX in the previously debuted Down for the Count, Mary consisted of penguins, WWI sit-ups (which were apparently new to the long-absent Cardinal), Dr. Ws and Freddy Mercuries.
    YHC had the original draft of the beatdown written out in early May and figured that all would go according to the anticipated plan. However, much was overturned, and YHC is just glad that rules are made to be broken and that YHC didn’t focus very hard on the beatdown’s every detail, as he usually does.
    SYITG,
    Pope

  • Try Athletes – from Paradox

    Does anyone else have an item on your bucket list that looks wayyyy better on paper and in your head than in reality.
    YHCs has always been the triathlon.
    The conversation goes something like this :

    12 year old YHC brain:
    bruhhhh Conquering multiple elements of human locomotion in a variety of terrains, an ultimate test. You are literally an amphibious machine. Cross that finish line while everyone cheers your name. The ladies will be lined up. This is your life’s greatest work.

    35 year old YHC brain:
    bro , chill, you get the heeby jeebies from swimming in deep water, biking always hurts your back, and your feet cramp after a two mile run. If you keep taking ibuprofen you will get an ulcer. Check yourself before you shipwreck yourself.

    And so on just like that for decades.
    But no more!
    Today we put the triathlon to bed once and for all…as a team!

    Duke put down those electrolyte gummies and roll the footage.

    12 pax beat the gloom on a beautiful summer morning at the Peltch. YHC rolled in a touch early to plant a few seeds and then met up with a growing prethang Saturday crew of Horn, Diddle and Ronnie. With a steady pace we covered topics ranging from Cardinals secret beach workouts to Horns new longboard interest group and melted away a few miles in the process. Please text YJ for all prethang details if you are interested (there’s an application and he needs to know your long term intentions and previous prethang relationship history)

    Several more pax trickled in and we had a rock solid group ready to race.

    Warmup
    Started with a ear splitting cadence of 36 SSH to honor the bday of our resident beast Enron. Full back blast sarcasm aside here, Ronnie is a cornerstone of our pax , always exhibiting a tenacious spirit and has really progressed into a force to be reckoned with physically.
    Enjoy those well earned bday jucifers brother!

    We got back into a steady warmup when YHC heard a verbal altercation brewing.
    At only 2 minutes and 39 seconds into the beatdown Sheriff Deputy of Form Yankee Joseph found his first citation. Does proper form have an age limit? not for this deputy. There is no jurisdiction when someone does a half Side straddle. He is the Law.
    Little did he know the young Coyote is highly skilled in verbal jiuJitsu and in seconds had YJ questioning his entire form police career and presenting badge and gun to Goose.
    The dust settled and a Donnybrook was avoided , Goose threatened to hose us and we moved on.

    Indian run
    Classic Sea Shanty run
    Last man Drop off 5 diamonds merkins
    We ran to tennis court for two songs to set the mood.

    Da Tanggggg

    Part 1 : Swim
    Open Ocean Jam session

    Baby Shark
    YHC set the mood with this dark and foreboding tail.
    Burpee on Shark
    SSH on song
    On about the 3rd burpee we had our first casualty as the baby shark was clearly targeting the elderly blood in the water. Further investigation underway to see if a banana peel from Coyote was the murder weapon. (But seriously rest up Jeaux, the team needs you)

    Under the Sea
    Side shuffle
    Bobby Hurley on Sea
    This one got warm pretty fast and begin to set the stage for further cardio testing.

    Buddy System
    Partner up
    Both complete 20 2 is 1 flutter kicks sprint to tennis ball bucket. Ten merkins at tennis’s ball and sprint back. (About 50 yards away)
    We all ended up with 6 tennis balls per couple but Cuz did some weird Yee Yee math and said 5 so he and partner Frankenbeans took penalty burpees.

    Part 2 : Bike
    Indian Run #2
    We hit the road in search of our bikes.
    As we crossed the ditch Horn kept us entertained with a rendition of I believe I can Fly
    He ate that dirt sandwich with a smile on his face and a song in his heart. You can’t keep a good man down.

    Last man drop off for 5 2 is 1 Freddy mercuries.
    Frankenbeanz succumbed to a leg injury halfway through and YHC deployed Horn on a life raft to check in on the growing IR list.

    Bicycle Song at Tennis court
    Freddy mercuries on bicycle
    Leg raises on other parts
    Superfun(d) began to question the amount of sugar YHC had in his cereal.

    Part 3: Run

    Tennis Ball Suicide relay
    Split into two teams
    Must run full suicide to the bucket , get tennis ball
    Full suicide back to secure tennis ball at home base
    Team with most balls wins

    Back to the flag for a little Mary

    WetTap awarded the GiGi to Coyote for his resistance to the form police. I know Coyote is already busting merkins so he can look jacked in the GiGi next Sat.
    SuperFun(d) sent the Animal back to its originator as Goose continues to pound out 4000 Bonnie Blair’s and big boys per beatdown.

    COT and WetTap prayed us out

    NMM

    YHC is an over-analyzer by nature. If you lay out 20 reps of an exercise in front of me my brain says “ok 5 slowish, 10 regular then just kinda bob around till someone else stops. Full self preservation mode. Yet some of my favorite moments in F3 happen when the beatdown overrides the system. The intensity is cranked, sweat in your eyes, minimal mental processing, just you and your team stuck solidly in the present. One tennis ball at a time till there are no more.

    You can Try for yourself
    Try for individual gains
    Try for self recognition
    And you will feel good temporarily.
    But hidden in the secret sauce of F3 is the Try for others while the “Me” takes a back seat.

    Grateful for the men of F3 as we make each other a little stronger each day.

    SYITG
    Dox