F3 New Orleans

Tag: Goose

  • Fat Tuesday Tuff- Volume 2: Texaco Cat has Unfinished Business – from Paradox

    “What is a Mardi Gras?” YHC asked. Standing in the playground of Homer Elementary , YHC was at that tender age of naivety when it seems coaches have all the answers to life’s questions. My PE coach cinched up his grey Riddell shorts (you know the ones) around a considerable beer gut and confidently informed me:

    “ Yea Owens, well it’s pretty much a bunch of idiots get drunk and dress up like fools with their friends then give up bread or something ….why don’t you go cover first base and maybe ask your parents”

    9 year old YHC trotted out to first base safely tucking Mardi Gras into my “Bobby Bouche: Things That are the Devil” folder, right beside football, MTV and any activities after 8pm.
    Thankfully it didn’t stay tucked away for long as God put YHC on a path towards south La and I would soon be in a free men’s workout group where the chatter de jour was usually “how to say pirogue” or “whether potato salad and gumbo should ever touch each other”. It’s one of the many fine attributes of this thing we call F3, somedays my virgin ears hear Depeche Mode and can never regain innocence and others days if I’m the lucky downwind pax, I get a fartlek taste in the air of last night’s Cajun cuisine. So, todays beatdown would be a wild hodge-podge of Mardi Gras learned, observed and practiced from a North La transplant.

    LEGAL DISCLAIMER: In the court case filed as Mr. Ronnie Lillickk vs the Pax of F3 Thibodaux the ruling of the jury was that YHCs north La version of Mardi Gras does not represent all North La transplants. Furthermore, there are many fine intelligent people form this part of the state.

    Duke! I know you are the King of Barkus this year but you still have to roll the beautiful footage!!

    Warmup
    YHC moseyed in from deep Richman territory adorned in only the finest cheap plastic gadgetry that Houma CVS could offer. Running right into a welcome sight of none other than Tidy Whitey!! He got a few highlighter stick pops as penance for 500 plus missed beatdowns but was welcomed back with much hoopla and praise! With 8 more pax ready to roll we got down to business with the usuals as YHCs outfit could not withstand even a few SSHs, one hates to see it. A bumper/stop sign mosey was in order to get the legs pumping and begin racking up some RCR miles.

    THANG 1
    Mardi Gras Mambo –The Meters

    Traditional F3 Thibodaux style with Merkins on Mambo and Donkey Kicks on “Down in New Orleans”. This song goes down in F3 Thib lore. In its debut the line “it takes a cool cat to blow a horn” was translated (by YHCS caffeine riddled brain) into “Texaco Cat blows a horn” and the legend of Texaco Cat still lives on . YHC has always imagined Texaco Cat as a north La gas station attendant that’s strong as an ox, knows his rights and has a bumper sticker on his hemi Dodge Ram that says “kids who fish and hunt don’t steal and deal”.

    YHC gave the disclaimer that proper form would be observed and rewarded. Yankee Jeaux was locked in early and often in this beatdown and took the merkin form title easily. He was then granted the Tutu of Power and the Flashing Stick of Trust to lead us as the Grand Merkin Marshal in an Indian Run Parade with 3 drop off LBCs ( ya gotta find dat baby in da king cake shah! Piyyyyahhhh)

    Onward to the beginning of Richmans loop for “Throw me something Mister”, originating from a younger ignorant YHC speculating that maybe all those cajuns are just angrily throwing stuff around because they got all them teeth and no teethbrush (ok I’ve reached my second Waterboy reference and I promise that’s it)

    PAX partnered up with a goal of transporting both pax and 1 tennis ball to the far corner of RL. Mode of transport was mosey then catch a “throw” from your partner. Rinse and repeat with 3 “Hi 5” burpee penalty for a drop. Ended up in a two horse race with Goose/Cuz vs YJ/AB enjoying a reduced burpee penalty at the finish line. The rest of the us enjoying a 10 burpee appetizer.

    THANG 2

    Next up Mardi Gras Trivia to represent YHCs schooling years when I began to figure out the Rubiks cube holiday of mardi gras and Lent.

    Correct Answer- run/nur 1/2 road to port a jeaux
    Incorrect – run /nur full road to cones and back

    1-Name all three states in which Fat Tuesday is recognized as a State Holiday.
    ANSWER: LA, AL, FL- With a little prodding we got this correct.

    **LEGAL DISCLAIMER: In the case of Mr./Future Dr. Maught vs the people of Florida the jury has come to a decision that he was in fact “not raised here” but does at times display Floridian characteristics and is able to leverage their politicians for social media clout.

    2-Carnival comes from the Latin phrase Carne Vale meaning what?
    ANSWER: Farewell to Meat – YHC was feeling gracious after those penalty burpees and helped a bit on this one.

    3- This on screen Batman served as King Bachus?
    Michael Keaton was correct with a surprising lack of controversy that Michael Keaton was the GOAT on screen Batman. YHC was ready for a good ole donnybrook if anyone said the word Clooney.

    4- New Orleans cancelled Mardi Gras parades in 1870 due to an outbreak of this disease?
    ANSWER: Yellow fever – Correct and a very safe guess for any illness before the 20th century.

    5- Krewe of Zulu tosses what coveted Mardi Gras trinket during the parade each year?
    “Coconut” was immediately given as an answer then contested that this was incomplete and YHCs brief internet research led him to believe it was only GOLD coconuts. YHC will now award post beatdown points that this was acceptable and letters of condolence have been sent to all who ran that extra eighth of a mile.

    THANG 3

    Only in the last 3 years has YHC come to fully appreciate Mardi Gras as part of the yearly feast before we begin our Lenten fasting. After some exicon research YHC found the Cooper to be a great representation of contrasted feast/fast with some potential RCR mileage sprinkled in .
    The (mini and abbreviated ) Cooper
    *editors note- a full Cooper is 10 merkins, squats, burpees with a quarter mile run in between each round
    Fast- Run 1/4 Mile (alley/straight away/alley and back )
    Feast – 7merkins , 7burpees, 7 squats

    The crew got about 3 rounds into this before YHC realized we were a touch behind schedule and called an Omaha at the line. We finished the 5 rep and 3 rep rounds at the corners of the loop then sprinted for home.

    Counting, naming and welcoming the prodigal Tighty Whitey return!

    InVESTment given to Cuz for his willingness to wear a hat and play the part of “that guy at the parade that bases his whole life on defending Bud Light”.

    COT and Cuz prayed us out

    Grateful to show up each day and improve the mind , body, and spirit with you fellas.

    See you in the Gloom

    Paradox

  • Bountiful – from Goose

    YHC purposely avoided posting any hype last night given the pattern of Monday Q’s that have resulted in slim pickin’s at The Stage. And, though the numbers were still low (correlation is not necessarily causation!), the two PAX who showed (besides Pope) were of the highest quality. Cardinal fell for the trap (he thought YJ was Q-ing) and Wet Tap ain’t skerred. So, though the numbers weren’t bountiful, the beatdown would be.

    After a warmup of the usuals and a bumper, stop sign mosey, YHC revealed the cardboard with a list of exercises written hastily scrawled upon it. Inspiration came from Enron’s recent, epic Q that brought a full-body exercise combined with mucho miles. This time, though, instead of 30 reps of each exercise, we’d do 40, and instead of the alphabet, the exercises’ first letters spelled out “BOUNTIFUL GRACES”, and instead of a 1/8 mile lap, we ran the 1/4 mile bumper/stop sign/stage lap after each exercise.

    Bose’ started cranking the tunage, and it was every man for himself, though high-fives and encouraging grunts were given and received in abundance as we passed one another on the road. Pope stayed either just behind or just ahead of YHC, like a two-year-old puppy running circles around an older, stiffer, heavier, out-of-breath dog. (I swear, he bounces down the road like his legs are made of rubber. Very light rubber.)

    Here’s the exercise list–40 reps apiece:
    BBSU
    Overhead press (no coupon)
    Uh-no’s (just Ono’s–couldn’t find a better U exercise that Enron hadn’t already used)
    No-cheat Merkins
    Tricep Dips
    Imperial Walkers (2:1)
    Freddy’s (2:1)
    Upside Down Angels (Australian Sweat Angels)
    Lunges (1:1)
    Groiners (oof)
    Russian Twists (aka American Hammers) (2:1)
    American Hammers (aka Russian Twists) (2:1)
    Crab Cakes (2:1)
    Ex-wings (1:1)
    Squats

    YHC and Pope only got through R, and Tap and Card weren’t far behind. So, we worked dem muscles and logged about 3 miles apiece (thankfully, we were 3:1 Thibby to JV).
    The Bountiful Graces theme came from a revelation (or reminder) last night that God doesn’t usually take away the things that are going wrong, that cause us pain and unjust expense of energy, but if we can entrust those to him and stop being so focused on how unjust it all is, there are bountiful graces to be received. There are truly beautiful gifts to be received if we let go of how things should be. And, that’s the mindset that makes F3 work so well. Yeah, it brings with it way more pain and unjust expense of energy than anyone should have to shell out at 5:15 in the morning, but the graces are obviously bountiful; no one can argue with that. And, the more we let go of how things ought to be, the more we can rejoice in them!

    Announcements and excitement building for Saturday’s “It’s only just a little old mile”. COT and Tap prayed us out. Huge respect and appreciation for these dudes!

    SYITG,
    Goose

  • The Alphabet Marathon – from Enron

    In preparation for this morning’s beatdown, YHC had the task of coming up with something that would incorporate enough running to be effective for Run Cajun Run milage, as well as keep the PAX’s minds off previously mentioned running. A few months back an idea to go through the alphabet with various exercises had arisen and YHC thought this might be the perfect opportunity to put it in place.

    10 strong staggered in on a chilly morning at the Stage only to be greeted by a couple children’s drawing books laid out on the concrete. On those two books were the letters of the alphabet with corresponding exercises written on them. Naturally, that sparked a little bit of chatter only to be stopped by circling up that PAX to start the warmup.

    Warmarama:
    SSH, WM, Willie Mays Hayes, AC, Cherry Pickers, Self-Love, IW
    The 1 and Only Thang:
    The Alphabet Marathon

    Attention was drawn to the drawing boards where the letters of the alphabet were written, next to each letter was a corresponding exercise. The instructions were to perform 30 of each exercise (30 seconds of some), then run a lap around the stage after each letter’s exercise was complete. The lap is .12 miles, meaning that if the entire alphabet was completed, that PAX would have run 3.12 miles.
    The letters and exercises were as follows:
    A- American Hammers
    B- Big Boy Sit Ups – This was a last-minute decision to scratch burpees off the list. A gracious Q indeed.
    C- Coupon Curls
    D- Dips
    E- Elbow Plank (30 seconds)
    F- Flutter Kicks (2=1)
    G- Gore (Al) (30 seconds)
    H- Humpers (Monkey)
    I- Imperial Walkers
    J- J-Lo’s
    K- Kettlebell Swings
    L- Lunges 1=1
    M- Merkins
    N- No’s(Oh) – Somehow almost forgot this letter
    O- Overhead Press
    P- Pickle Pounders
    Q- Q’s Choice – This ended up being LBCs
    R- Reverse Crunches
    S- Side Straddle Hops
    T- Toy Soldiers
    U- Up Straddle Hops – A 1 legged Side Straddle hop which made for an interesting sight
    V- V-Ups
    W- World War 1 Sit ups
    X- X-Wings
    Y- Yul Brynner’s
    Z- Zombie Crunches

    Prior to this morning, YHCs belief was that none of the PAX would be close to completion of the alphabet. This assumption was incorrect as Goose, Pope, and Honeysuckle, were very close to completion with only the letter Z left to complete when “recover” was called. Also, there were many other of the group that were very close behind. This may be one that has a redo to see where progress is made.
    Great work by all this morning. The variation was enjoyed and the milage still abundant. Always great to continue to push ourselves with this crew.
    Announcements and the inVESTment was passed from Honeysuckle to Goose
    COT and Paradox prayed us out.

    SYITG,

    Enron

  • Running Against the Wind – from Paradox

    9 strong at the den on a crisp first day of February. A fine month for running. YHC had three objectives today: Unravel an 80s album cover mystery, Camouflage running with a point system and continue to honor the life of service lived by Bishop Dorsonville.
    The RCR hype train was at a full speed choo choo by Wednesday evening and now it was time to back up the chatter with some work.

    Duke! Its Run Cajun Run month
    Stop carb loading and roll the beautiful footage.

    Warmup
    SSH- IW- toy soldiers – AC both ways

    Noted that YHC, Valve and Ronnie were outnumberd 3-6 by the Built this Thibby enemy squadron today. With Honeysuckles 1000 mile stare after showing up on foot and Popeyes safety vest they are an intimidating bunch. Return of JV can only hope CVS runs out of knee braces and Metamucil soon. Cant wait to see how Darth Fartsack responds to this attack on his teammates.

    Continued warm up…

    YHC met Bishop Dorsonville at OLOPs this summer and along with sharing repeated jokes about Cardinals arm circles with him I was also drawn to how he made complete strangers comfortable with silly jokes. Still cracks me up thinking of it and that’s where we’ll begin this beatdown, with the power of humor to break the ice …or sore muscles.

    I’m not sure if you guys grew up with a single hilarious trigger word in your childhood. But for YHC if there was a single noun that turned YHC and his siblings into cackling hyenas it was “commode”. Even now as a semi grown man of 35 years it makes me giggle. I can’t really explain why but just the mention of it , especially by some older prim and proper family member in polite context would set off such a riot that only threatened bodily harm could contain us. So on Tuesday Tuff when Goose and Popeye convinced YHC that there was an actual band called Depeche Mode it triggered YHCs 8 year old brain into snickering all day that it sounded like a really really fancy French toilet. Which brings us to today’s extended warmup. YHC had a song ready and requested the Artist, # of band members and meaning of the aforementioned artist . Goose saw this one coming a mile away and was ready and waiting to help the pax take 30 seconds of pain away by guessing Depeche Mode ( before a single note played ), AB deducted another 30 by correctly guessing 4 original band members. No luck on finding the meaning of this mysterious phrase but I hope today as you sit upon your commode and think about it , that your bowel movement is neither fashionable nor hurried.

    – Depeche Mode
    “just can’t get enough “

    High Knees/Butt Kicks
    Burpee on “Get enough”

    We got enough.

    -The Thang

    With the knees high and and butts kicked we checked off objective #1.
    YHC now switched gears into our main run event. Several of us today would likely attend or honor the celebration of life for Bishop Dorsonville. Even in his short time here quite a few of our pax had interactions or bonds with him that will last a lifetime. In prayer and reflection two major points stuck out to me that I wanted to highlight. Both points deal with the unknown variables that God may ask us to accept in His will.
    Bishop couldn’t have known much about this little bayou community and even more unknown was how long he would be here. He dove into both with unrelenting service until he was called home.

    So to honor the act of service with unknown variables YHC built a run course with 4 options.
    The exercise at the station and the time of rounds would be a mystery.
    You can complete any station as many times as you want or not at all.

    The Stations:
    (Measured via strava)

    #1 1/8th mile – 1 point
    to top of reservoir and back – bearcrawl to top, 10 Bonnie Blair’s , bearcrawl to the bottom

    #2 1/4 mile – 1 lap around auditorium , at cone complete 10 no cheat merkins , run back

    #3 1/3 mile – to bball court
    15 star jumps at cone
    -cone flip option, 5 tries and if you land it you can skip the star jumps. Miss and you double the reps.

    #4 1/2 mile
    Far side of reservoir and complete the loop. 15 Jillian Michaels
    -optional dice roll to reduce your Reps or increase (5-30 on dice)

    Complete all 4 – (3 point bonus)

    YHC added distraction options at station 3-4 to highlight that even when Gods plan for us is clear there will always be other paths that look easy or even fruitful. Some may even utilize our natural talents and through prayer may be useful. I left it to the pax to choose wisely.

    Round 1 – Solo (12 minutes)
    – YHC loved watching AB and Goose pick the course apart. These guys are bloodhounds for the most efficient points in a game.
    – Several pax took the honorable path at completing all 4 distances but Jillian Michael was not a fan favorite.
    – In the end Pope got some after the whistle credit and edged out AB 19-16. Pope gave us a respectable 20 lunges and we thanked him.

    Round 2 – (10 min)
    split into teams but 1 pax must stay at home base doing SSH at all times (swaps out)

    -the secret was now out that station 3 was the best run for your money and both teams headed there in a wad of heavy breathing. The cone flipping didn’t get any easier and many star jumps were done .

    Team 2 was the victor 40-36 and doled out 10 tempo merkins.

    Thang Finale : 3 min 20 seconds
    Bob Seger – Against the wind

    YHC dialed up a little Bob Seger for some February run hype and after some discussion the pax decided correctly that it, just like awful British techno, had been released in 1980.
    Random Ab exercises on song with leg raise on “against the wind”

    Counting, Naming , Investing

    Valve passed along the investment to the cone flipping savant AB who , dare I say it, wore it in a hurried fashion!

    Announcement:

    RCR – Log your miles

    Swag is on link if you want to support the charities further.

    Feb 17 It’s Only a Mile

    Bunkhouse this Sunday
    Text me if you want in or would like to provide a side or rolls. (Serve 30-50)
    Leave from stage at 4:20
    Back by 6:30ish

    COT and Lox prayed us out

    Men, I’m grateful for the opportunity to lead you and to be strengthened by your own examples of service.

    SYITG
    Dox

  • Free Solo 2: Struggler’s Run – from America’s Best

    YHC pulled up at least 7 or 8 minutes early to find overly-zealous Enron and Paradox at the Stage, arriving early to gossip. The rest of the PAX poured in, slowly, gradually, like some sort of sweet viscous substance…

    Warmarama – typical SSH, toy soldiers, windmills, arm circles, then a curve ball… butt-kicks straight into high knees? For some men, the muscle memory kicked in, and the knees went up before the brains even knew what was happening. Overall, there seemed to be a very mixed reaction to this, and YHC was afraid for a moment there may be a Q coup.

    Pre-thang:
    Last time YHC put on a “Free Solo” beatdown, we had extra time and went into an OT “make it stop” name that tune-athon. Due to this, and with RCR coming up, YHC decided to start this one with a run.
    Indian Run while the Wu-Thang plunked out music of mostly bands with misleading names. The goal is to guess how many band members are in said band. The difference between your guess and the actual is the number of exercises we do at each stop.
    Popeye impressed, calling out Arcade Fire immediately, and them even more impressively, MJ knew (or guessed?) that there were 5 members. No extra work!
    The Thompson Twins were next, and of course the trick was that there are 3 members, but we only had to do one merkin, as Wet Tap was called upon and (understandably) guessed 2.
    Next we nurred, as a hint, hoping someone could guess “Feels like we Only Go Backwards” by Tame Impala. The guess was 4, but there is only one member in this “band.” We did 3 BBS.
    The next was my favorite, and it was even better because we had already done BBS and merkins, so the next had to be burpees. Nobody knew the Polyphonic Spree song (also titled “Hold Me Now”) so our buy in was 5 burpees.
    Pope was called upon to be the scapegoat (by the way, the person who was randomly chosen to guess each time was the person who happened to stop closest to the streetlight).
    Pope guessed 5 (I think, or 8), but there are 27 members of this ridiculous band, so either way it was Samsonite. So we did a lot of burpees.
    Goose nailed Bungle in the Jungle by Jethro Tull, and someone (Enron) knew there were 4 members. No extra work. Honeysuckle called Superman by Five for Fighting, but Dox thought there were most likely 5 members of this one-man band.

    Back at the start for the Real Thang: FREE SOLO 2
    The Rules: A solo from a song is played while we all do some kind of work. The song is curated for a single individual in the attending PAX. 3 things with slightly different results occur:
    1. The person for whom the song was chosen IDs the song. Result= all PAX bear crawl 20 yards “free” of gear (coupon), then lunge walk back. Everyone takes “victory lap.”
    2. Some other dude identifies the song, freeing himself from the burden of the coupon. Everyone else block-bears up and lunge-walks with coupon back. Dude takes a victory lap while rest of PAX continues work.
    3. Nobody IDs the song everyone murder-bunnies up, and rifle carries back, then does “sprint of defeat” to flag and back

    As we began, Wet Tap busted out of the gates like a thing that busts out of gates busting out of a gate.
    He ID’d the first two songs without even knowing what was happening, stealing Dox’s and Pope’s songs as well as Pope’s thunder. And he took 2 victory laps in a row while we continued the work.
    Popeye’s musical chops impressed again, identifying his solo from “When Doves Cry.”
    YHC was downright giddy when he saw Goldilox pull in this morning… I’ve been waiting to play this smooth jazz sax solo from “Too Hot.” Nobody knew the song… I guess all these Millennials think “Kool and the Gang” is just something Samuel L. Jackson said. (And in case you missed it, “too hot” is something Goldilocks said).
    Enron ID’d “Money” but YHC suspects fowl play. No, not foul.
    “Honeybee” Tom Petty. Nobody knows that old fart, apparently.
    For the fledgling pilot, “Learning to Fly.” Again. Free Solo 1 brought us this song by old fart Tom Petty. This time, same title, different song, different band. Nobody knew it.
    Overall, I know, too much Pink Floyd.
    Evident next during what is arguably one of the best and most recognizable guitar solos ever. As we did thrusters, Goose prodded Wet Tap to ID “Comfortably Numb.”
    Tap’s response: “I’d rather just keep doing Thrusters.”
    (Time ran out before Dilly’s and MJ’s songs could be unveiled… to be concluded)

    COT: Count-o-rama, Name-o-rama,

    Animal was bestowed upon Picadilly.

    Honey-o-rama courtesy of The Beekeeper (aka Honeysuckle)

    Thanks for putting up with my nonsense once again, fellas.

    SYITG,
    AB

  • Free Solo 2: Struggler’s Run – from America’s Best

    YHC pulled up at least 7 or 8 minutes early to find overly-zealous Enron and Paradox at the Stage, arriving early to gossip. The rest of the PAX poured in, slowly, gradually, like some sort of sweet viscous substance…

    Warmarama – typical SSH, toy soldiers, windmills, arm circles, then a curve ball… butt-kicks straight into high knees? For some men, the muscle memory kicked in, and the knees went up before the brains even knew what was happening. Overall, there seemed to be a very mixed reaction to this, and YHC was afraid for a moment there may be a Q coup.

    Pre-thang:
    Last time YHC put on a “Free Solo” beatdown, we had extra time and went into an OT “make it stop” name that tune-athon. Due to this, and with RCR coming up, YHC decided to start this one with a run.
    Indian Run while the Wu-Thang plunked out music of mostly bands with misleading names. The goal is to guess how many band members are in said band. The difference between your guess and the actual is the number of exercises we do at each stop.
    Popeye impressed, calling out Arcade Fire immediately, and them even more impressively, MJ knew (or guessed?) that there were 5 members. No extra work!
    The Thompson Twins were next, and of course the trick was that there are 3 members, but we only had to do one merkin, as Wet Tap was called upon and (understandably) guessed 2.
    Next we nurred, as a hint, hoping someone could guess “Feels like we Only Go Backwards” by Tame Impala. The guess was 4, but there is only one member in this “band.” We did 3 BBS.
    The next was my favorite, and it was even better because we had already done BBS and merkins, so the next had to be burpees. Nobody knew the Polyphonic Spree song (also titled “Hold Me Now”) so our buy in was 5 burpees.
    Pope was called upon to be the scapegoat (by the way, the person who was randomly chosen to guess each time was the person who happened to stop closest to the streetlight).
    Pope guessed 5 (I think, or 8), but there are 27 members of this ridiculous band, so either way it was Samsonite. So we did a lot of burpees.
    Goose nailed Bungle in the Jungle by Jethro Tull, and someone (Enron) knew there were 4 members. No extra work. Honeysuckle called Superman by Five for Fighting, but Dox thought there were most likely 5 members of this one-man band.

    Back at the start for the Real Thang: FREE SOLO 2
    The Rules: A solo from a song is played while we all do some kind of work. The song is curated for a single individual in the attending PAX. 3 things with slightly different results occur:
    1. The person for whom the song was chosen IDs the song. Result= all PAX bear crawl 20 yards “free” of gear (coupon), then lunge walk back. Everyone takes “victory lap.”
    2. Some other dude identifies the song, freeing himself from the burden of the coupon. Everyone else block-bears up and lunge-walks with coupon back. Dude takes a victory lap while rest of PAX continues work.
    3. Nobody IDs the song everyone murder-bunnies up, and rifle carries back, then does “sprint of defeat” to flag and back

    As we began, Wet Tap busted out of the gates like a thing that busts out of gates busting out of a gate.
    He ID’d the first two songs without even knowing what was happening, stealing Dox’s and Pope’s songs as well as Pope’s thunder. And he took 2 victory laps in a row while we continued the work.
    Popeye’s musical chops impressed again, identifying his solo from “When Doves Cry.”
    YHC was downright giddy when he saw Goldilox pull in this morning… I’ve been waiting to play this smooth jazz sax solo from “Too Hot.” Nobody knew the song… I guess all these Millennials think “Kool and the Gang” is just something Samuel L. Jackson said. (And in case you missed it, “too hot” is something Goldilocks said).
    Enron ID’d “Money” but YHC suspects fowl play. No, not foul.
    “Honeybee” Tom Petty. Nobody knows that old fart, apparently.
    For the fledgling pilot, “Learning to Fly.” Again. Free Solo 1 brought us this song by old fart Tom Petty. This time, same title, different song, different band. Nobody knew it.
    Overall, I know, too much Pink Floyd.
    Evident next during what is arguably one of the best and most recognizable guitar solos ever. As we did thrusters, Goose prodded Wet Tap to ID “Comfortably Numb.”
    Tap’s response: “I’d rather just keep doing Thrusters.”
    (Time ran out before Dilly’s and MJ’s songs could be unveiled… to be concluded)

    COT: Count-o-rama, Name-o-rama,

    Animal was bestowed upon Picadilly.

    Honey-o-rama courtesy of The Beekeeper (aka Honeysuckle)

    Thanks for putting up with my nonsense once again, fellas.

    SYITG,
    AB

  • 7-11 – from Safety Valve

    The iconic convenience store 7-11 has many similarities to our own 7s and 11s workouts. Always available, usually easy to find and come up with, and can get a multitude of things in a very quick visit. Since most of F3 thibodaux has come to expect some sort of cardio running Q from YHC, things had to be shaken up. How can YHC build a workout that we run or nur for 2 miles while not seeming like we are actually running? 7-11 is the answer.

    Warmaramma
    SSH
    Imperial walkers
    Toy soldiers
    Willy Mae’s Hayes
    Arm circle forward and back
    Cherry pickers

    7s
    Man makers and merkins
    Nur as the mode of transport

    Recovery mosey around the track.

    11s
    Coupon press and jump squats
    Run as the mode of transport

    Recovery mosey around the track.

    7s
    Thrusters and LBCs
    Nur as the mode of transport

    Recovery mosey around the track.

    11s
    Curls and Burpees
    Run as the mode of transport

    This circuit brought us to end right at 6am. COT, intentions and Wet tap prayed us out. Goose VESTED YHC for the no skimp thruster form.

    Final thoughts:
    Often, we start getting comfortable with things in life. Comfort does not allow for growth. As Goose puts it “we do not deserve comfort!” Most recent beatdowns have excluded coupon work, and YHC has been enjoying the body weight and running side of life. It’s easier for me. In the earlier stages in F3 Thibodaux, YHC quickly found that thrusters and man makers were not his jam. They were tough, and at one point YHC said he would never incorporate those into any of his Q workouts. Well… that’s because YHC was soft then. F3 Thibodaux has since made me want that uncomfortable feeling because I know that’s when growth happens. Whether physical, emotional, or spiritual we have to go through those difficult times to learn about ourselves and overcome the struggle. So, keep struggling because it means good things will come out of it in the end. Great to lead this group. Thanks for showing up and working hard.

  • Life is Tough, so Persevere – from Lil Cuz

    YHC woke up to the sounds of thunder and lightning hoping it was closer to midnight than it was to 6am, but upon looking at the phone to assure me it was hours before we would be heading to the Peltch the phone read 5 minutes till alarm time. Not good…the weather would surely ruin any plans to listen to music through what would prove to be a daunting beatdown and the quiet would only add to the despair. Heading to the Peltch did not yield any better result as the rain continued to pour down all it had and YHC drove up to only one other car waiting in the parking lot. More cars started to arrive but each waited in their car as if they did not want to start the painful and miserable process about to begin.

    This start ended up being a perfect metaphor for the theme of today’s beatdown and Yankee Jeaux added to the hype with his own epic backblast as he spoke oh so eloquently, he is going to be a Dr. you know, about the path we are all on. How sometimes it seems we are not making progress but if we look back we can see how far we have actually come. This backblast was so good it was turned into hype for the next days beatdown as it applied to the theme. We push through life one day at a time and even one step at a time some days as we persevere through it all. YHC has been reflecting on the Armour of God: truth, righteousness and perseverance. We are called to persevere through life by relying on God and in this case on our brothers alongside us. We see them continuing along the path and this pushes us to continue as well. To persevere through difficulties we didn’t think were possible to overcome before, but we are lifted up by the guys around us in shared suffering to make ourselves better. Better for our wives, our children and our overall community. To do this, we have to put on our Armour of God and prepare for War.

    But first, we had to endure some shared suffering, YHC had forgotten his phone back at the truck so sprinted back to get it and the PAX did an assortment of exercises that in no way looked uniform. As if an army not yet trained for battle…

    Pre-Thang: Struggler by Brother Isaiah

    Side Straddle Hops for duration and a Burpee for each variation of struggle, struggling or struggler. This song lulls you into a false sense of strength and security but leads to a world of asking “when will this struggle end?” All the while, teaching you “every good thing is born of a struggle.”

    The MAIN THANG:

    The PAX would split into teams and throw 4 axes for points. This would determine the winner of the match; the loser would endure more suffering as a result. The target was set 15 feet away and the scoring is as follows: the black area (which is basically just hitting the board at all) would count as 1 point. The next ring is blue and would count as 2 points, then red as 3 points, and the final bullseye yellow for 4 points.

    Teams were as follows:
    Team 1:
    Cardinal
    Paradox
    Goose
    Duke

    Team 2:
    America’s Best
    Pope
    Lil’ Cuz
    Coyote / Pikachu

    Rd 1 Axe Battle:
    Team 1: 1
    Team 2: 0
    With some very errant throws undoubtedly affected by the 45 mph winds. It was a hurricane folks, nothing to see here.

    Round 1 Training:
    PAX begin with 20 merkins for the winner, and 25 for the losers
    Then a roughly 1/8 mile jog around the baseball field back to the thunderdome.
    Then 20 squats for the winners, and 25 for the losers.
    Bear Crawl around the thunderdome.
    20 Merkins for the winners, 25 for the losers.
    Roughly 1/8th mile around the baseball fields
    20 Squats for the winners, 25 for the losers.
    Lunge Walk around the Thunderdome.

    This was originally planned to be done at the Track, but EDW has locked every sneaky entrance we have found into this beloved new field and track establishment that the riff raff is no longer allowed to use. So we improvised by using the ever fitting “Thunder” dome as the rain continued to pour.

    Rd 2 Axe Battle:
    Everyone was losers with not one axe hitting the target. Horrible display from all, especially YHC who may or may not have spent hours the previous weekend working on technique.

    Round 2:
    This round followed almost the same as round one but the exercises were mountain climbers and leg raises. All did 35 reps as no team won this round. While jogging along around the baseball field YHC noticed a strange fellow sneaking behind a tree, “What could that man be doing?” I wondered. As YHC got closer it appeared he was urinating all over God’s green Earth in front of God and everybody albeit trying to hide behind the smallest tree he could find. This man shall remain nameless but maybe should be on a list somewhere.

    Rd 3 Axe Battle:
    Team 1: 0 from 15 ft
    Team 2: 0 from 15 ft

    Team 1: 4 from 10 ft
    Team 2: 3 from 10 ft

    Round 3:

    Followed the same exercises as Round 1 but due to time we called after/on the second round of jogging. Packed up our stuff and moseyed in the puddles back to the flag while being serenaded by AB’s impeccable Scottish (or maybe Irish) accent. He said stuff the whole way back but no one knows exactly what he said, as in true Scottish (or maybe Irish) fashion.

    COT, and Dox prayed us out.

    Thankful to be back to leading this group and looking forward to more suffering and perseverance in the future.

    Philippians 4:13

    SYITG,

    Lil’ Cuz

  • Not in This Life, Sucka! – from Yankee Joe

    “My brethren, consider it a cause of great joy whenever you endure various trials, 3 for you know that the testing of your faith will develop perseverance.4 And let perseverance complete its work so that you may become perfect and complete, and not be deficient in any respect.”

    James 1: 2-4
    ——————————–

    ‘Tis the season of resolutions. New year, new me. Keto diets and less sodas. Time to pass on the second helping of cake and put down the crack pipe.

    For men of faith, it is a season of renewed vigor in our relationship with God. It is a time for reflection, humility, and self denial. We are inclined to pause, take an account, and look up. Words like ‘trust’, ‘surrender’, and ‘vulnerability’ swirl around in our heads, desperately trying to make a connection with our hearts. It’s confusing, frustrating, infuriating, inspiring, exciting, terrifying…

    …at least that’s how YHC has been feeling. Perhaps an outlier, but doubtful.

    As such, heading into this Thursday’s Q at the Lion’s Den, YHC recalled an intriguing idea shared by Goose during the three-year F3 Thib manniversary. He shared that he prayed about his beatdown designs, letting the Lord lead…you know, about what might be best for a group of men… gathered in faith. Crazy, right?

    So, that’s what YHC did. What came was a glaring opportunity to share YHC’s struggles in his faith journey…something that required ‘trust’, ‘surrender’, and ‘vulnerability’. Interesting.

    ———————————

    The beatdown would consist of five rounds, taking the Pax through their own faith journey. The ultimate goal would be to sprint for10 minutes without a break at the end. However, before we could sprint, we needed to learn how to walk, jump, lunge, and crawl.

    As YHC neared completing the design, it was clear that there was a gap. Something was missing. After some more prayer, YHC realized that part of his struggle was…well…prayer.

    So, at the end of each round of the faith journey, YHC needed an exercise that would represent our struggle and growth in our prayer lives. But what? The Exicon offered nothing of substance. Maybe some ‘we’re not worthy’s’, but YHC didn’t want Goose to bring 20 coupons. Prayer pose in squat position? Nope, looked too much like a Buddha stance…like Paradox holding Al Gore.

    THEN, the answer was served up on a plate of spinach with a side of smirk and ‘be all you can be’ snark. Popeye quipped to Paradox that YHC’s Apolo Ohno form was unacceptable. Now, YHC is not an overly sensitive lad, but to publicly challenge another man’s form is a serious accusation and bears the burden of proof in a court of kangaroos.

    Yes, yes, ENRON. I hear you all the way in Mobile…the previous sentence may be the most hypocritical statement ever uttered in F3 Thibodaux. YHC has indeed been known to publicly challenge men about their form. But if it pleases this corrupt court, I offer the following evidence.

    Exhibit A: Montana’s AIR SQUATS (like standing geriatric monkey humpers)

    Exhibit B: Paradox’s MERKIN where his waist touches the ground with arms still fully extended (like ⅓ merkin, ⅓ pickle pounder, ⅓ cobra)

    Exhibit C: Enron’s JUMP ROPE (there is no description…it’s just uncanny)

    Exhibit D: Popeye’s BONNIE BLAIR’s (like a depressed MC Hammer shuffle after learning that Z Cavaricci’s went out of fashion)

    Exhibit E: Cardinal’s ARM CIRCLES just rotating at the elbow…no shoulders required

    Exhibit F: America’s Best’s THRUSTERS where the only thing he’s thrusting is Dave Matthews’ inexplicable existence into our ears. (It’s almost as bad as Dox’s entire catalog of music. Almost.)

    —————————————-

    Ok, so the Apolo Ohno. An Exicon favorite in tribute to the two-time Olympic gold medalist speed skater. YHC was mildly aware that he could put more effort into the exercise, perhaps getting lower to the ground, but it was more of a style choice. That said, after watching a few videos of Mr. Ohno’s form, closely studying the mechanics of his crossover cornering techniques, and asking around (for a friend, of course), the verdict was crystal clear.

    YHC’s form was off. I mean…WAY OFF. Like, Samsonite luggage way off. How did this happen? How did it come to this? Why didn’t anyone say anything before? Just like realizing for the first time that your endowment is only average size…at best, part of my world came tumbling down. A house of cards.

    Regardless, YHC now had his secondary theme to represent the morphing struggle of his prayer life.

    ———————————–
    How It Started

    As we moved through Warmarama, YHC included some Apolo Ohno’s as a teaser before the reveal. Here, it was immediately apparent that YHC’s form had NOT improved since watching the videos. I shushed Goose, pretending it was all part of the plan and we proceeded to the thang.

    The Thang

    For each round, the PAX would endure a stage of their faith journey interrupted by a different take on the Apolo Ohno. The versions were close, but a bit awkward…and though uncomfortable and hard, still somehow enriching.

    Round 1

    – Spider-Man crawl to cone
    – 25 That’s A No-hno – In honor of the No-No king, Nolan Ryan and a nod to landing seven uppercuts to Robin Ventura’s face: Apollo Ohno form on the side crossover, but mimicking the Nolan Ryan arm movements normally done in side plank.
    – Reverse Spider-Man back to start
    – Chilcutt Peter Parkers to wait for pax

    ————————————-

    So here we are. At this point, you have made a valiant effort. Excited to launch down a path of walking closer with God, you’ve managed to endure something rather difficult. Then it seems, you find yourself right back where you started.

    However, the question becomes, “Are you? Are you right back where you started?” For YHC, it often feels like running in circles or like taking two steps forward and 100 back. That said, regardless of where you are (physically, spiritually, psychologically), have you taken the time to reflect on where you’ve just been? Are you sure you haven’t grown? Learned? Armed with some shaky, hesitant confidence, you keep fighting the good fight. You might try to take on more though it may feel like sometimes your legs are being cut out from under you.

    Round 2

    – Boo boo bear crawl (three legged) with left leg up to cone
    – 25 Only Bo-noh’s – commemorating one of the greatest dual threats in history, Bo Jackson. Specifically, in memory of that time when he broke a bat over his head after striking out!
    Arms up on either side of head pulling down like breaking a bat over your head
    – Boo boo bear crawl with right leg back to start
    – Chilcutt Peter Parkers to wait for pax

    ————————————–

    Once again, you find yourself seemingly (and frustratingly) near where you started. You’ve suffered a bit more, limping along. This time, however, you are perhaps a bit more willing to pause and reflect. Maybe you acknowledge that you may not have to be in such a hurry. You’re starting to actually consider at a deeper level the concepts of ‘trust’, ‘surrender’, and ‘sacrifice’. The initial euphoria has started to ebb. You move forward, but with caution and A LOT more questions. As such, you take long, slow strides (with knees TOUCHING the ground, Popeye).

    Round 3

    – Flying nuns to cone
    – 25 Ronnie Oh Hell-nohs – In acknowledgement of Enron’s impeccable merkins form and impressive prowess…On either side of the crossover side step, drop down for a merkin (50 total merkins)
    – Reverse flying nun to start
    – Chilcutt Peter Parkers to wait for pax

    ——————————————–

    “And David danced before the Lord with all his might…” 2 Samuel 6:14

    At this point, you only thought your journey had been difficult. The last experience was a wake-up call: It can get a lot tougher. It nearly killed you.

    Except, it didn’t kill you. Actually, as you reflect (more naturally now), you realize that it wasn’t that bad. Not only did you persevere, you feel stronger. What’s more is that you realize you might have even liked the struggle. Not from a sense of misguided martyrdom, but rather from a place of genuine humility. Whoa. What am I going to do now? It’s a new kind of scary. Perhaps there is a sense of empowerment derived not from pride, but from freedom. Real freedom. If you’re like YHC, you’re skeptical, you fight the urge to give in. This ‘surrender’ is even more terrifying when you realize you might be capable of letting go. Regardless, you’re fired up, but you don’t know how to run. Not yet. So you leap.

    “…the baby leaped in her womb…” Luke 1: 41

    Round 4

    – Broad jumps to cone
    – 25 Yankee Jeaux-noh’s – Jump squat in between each ohno for a total of 25 jump squats.
    – Crab walk back to start
    – Chilcutt Peter Parkers to wait for pax

    —————————————-

    “Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.”

    Romans 5: 3-5

    It is time to stand up. You are ready to run, while thanking God for the gift of wisdom to know when you should crawl. And the courage to do so. You may realize that these trials were and will always be part of the journey. Like Job, you might start to look at the setbacks as a Grace. For YHC, the distractions are not borne from difficulty, but rather because I put those things first. What if…just what if I were to give God the first fruits? Give Him all of it?

    You’re ready to run. You can stop whenever you feel like it. Whenever you feel like you have no more room to grow and that you’ve arrived at the pinnacle of your existence.

    You can stop.

    BUTTTT…you’re a man! You need metrics. You track outcomes. You crave structure. You compete to reach a destination. It might occur to you that there IS NO destination. There is no finish line. There is no rest. Well…we are promised that there is…

    …but not in this life, Sucka.

    Round 5

    – Sprint to embankment (approx. 60 yards) and crawl up hill
    – Let Your Yes Be Yes and Your No Be No-hno’s – 25 Apolo Ohno’s…real, authentic, perfectly formed Apolo Ohno’s
    – Sprint back to start
    – Repeato until time is called (approx. 10 minutes)

    ——————————————

    COT, ANIMAL went to MOM JEANS, and Honeysuckle prayed us out.

    Final Thought

    As I was demonstrating the broad jump squats in Round 4, I snarkily warned against incorrect form. I showed what poor form looked like. Then, I attempted to demonstrate the correct form. I then proceeded to FULLY bust my backside and landed flat on my six.

    Humility is a moving target. Once you think you got it, it’s gone.

    SYITG,

    Yankee Jeaux

  • Pardon the Interruption – from Honeysuckle

    On an unseasonably warm Tuesday Tuff morning, YHC arrived early to the Stage only to find Goose and Pope already waiting. So the fact that there were some exercises written down on paper was not going to be a surprise to them. But Jankee Joe, Safety Valve, and Goldilox arrived after YHC hid the sheet. Still, nobody knew what was about to happen. The warmarama began

    SSH, WMH, WM, IW, ACF/R, CP, TS, HK, BK

    Then the PAX moseyed to the start of Rich Man’s Loop and began an Indian Run with a 2-burpee drop off. This was done for the entire mile. Yankee Joe did in fact make it the whole mile, so he may be in better shape for RCR than he thinks. In the homestretch, a svelte figure emerged from the gloom and he revealed himself to be Smooth Operator coming in hot.

    Back at the Stage, YHC fetched the exercise list and described the 2-man Dora. 120 each of

    Shoulder tap merkins
    Tempo squats
    World War I situps
    Crab Humper / Crab Dip
    Reverse Crunch
    Bonnie Blairs

    While the second team member ran around the sidewalk around the field.

    This sounds straightforward enough, but there was a wrinkle to this Thang. Both the team member doing the exercise and the team member running would be subjected to interruptions. The exercising team member had to listen out for an EMOM beep, at which point he has to do two burpees before continuing on with the exercises.

    The running team member would only have to contend with the Hwy 308 traffic. For every vehicle that passed (most PAX also included vehicles exiting the subdivision), independent of where on the loop you might be, one burpee had to be performed.

    This was to challenge the PAX’s mental endurance as much as physical. The EMOM interruptions were clearly coming every minute, so everyone knew what to expect and when to expect them. That did not make handling the interruptions any easier, though. The highway interruptions were in an unknown quantity and interval. Let’s just say traffic was heavy this morning.

    The combination of planned and unplanned interruptions resonates with YHC following a week with a planned work trip, disrupting YHC’s own schedule as well as the family’s, plus several other unplanned issues that seem to be piling up. In other words, life, and we all can relate to it.

    The PAX wisely let the annoyance and tiredness wash over them as it was often hard to get momentum during the run portion. For example, picture a line of five cars passing, but after the five burpees were completed, only a single step could be taken before yet another car passed. And then another single step. Smooth Operator had a Lieutenant Dan moment when he was frequently seen mocking the highway for even more cars to pass.

    Due to time, the exercise quantity was reduced so we could finish, but no one was really upset about that. In fact, a determined Safety Valve was able to start and finish all the Crab Dips before Smooth and I (throuple) returned from the run. As per usual, Goose, Pope, Lox, and YJ crushed the beatdown but in lieu of planking YHC politely asked everyone to continue with the Hwy 308 burpees until time was called.

    Announcements, prayer intentions, Lox prayed us out.

    As always, it is a privilege to be a part of this group that continues to challenge and push each other to be better in every facet of life.

    SYITG,
    Honeysuckle