7:05am March 16
Nicholls University Campus Police Blotter
Early calls from the freshmen dorms reporting a group of middle aged vandals loitering around the soccer fields and hollering “do your burpees” at each other . Several shirtless. Smells like Mountain Dew. Others with matching insignias and new member initiates forced into green mullets. Clear gang affiliates. The tall one responding to honks seems to be the gang leader. And looks like the goalie is the enforcer, clearly he’s done some time but gosh he looks familiar. Like I just saw him teaching supply chains familiar…weird
.Student Officers in bound…Tasers on the ready…
…40 minutes earlier
Peltier Park Tennis Courts
**YHC and Gecko putting out cones in a beautiful gloom at the tennis court, walking though the game plan and contingencies.
YHC: “Chillier than I expected , did you bring your gloves bud ?”
Gecko (looking at the blueprint):
“I think I might get warm when we do burpees , if not we should just run more.”
YHC : (silence) *A single tear of pride rolls down one cheek. “You’re right buddy, you’re so right..**adds more burpees to notes section **
Let’s go find some bully boys! “
Duke!!
those beans are not magically delicious!
Roll that beautiful footage!
Warmup
YHC and Gecko rolled in from setup to unveil the newest F3 Thib Logo shovel flag to 13 other Pax ready to roll.
Wet Tap has been working overtime in the studio to crank out a high quality shovel/pole setup and we finally put the components together for a world premiere. It was glorious.
Will be a great addition to rep our crew at major gatherings.
ParO’dox McBurpee and GeckOCallahan took care of the rest of warmup with the usuals.
Some pax commented the Irish accent had declined with a whole year to improve and these pax were politely asked to write their local representatives with further complaints.
Proper Irishmen Run
Drop off man does 3 Bonnie Blair’s on our way to Tennis Court.
At Tennis Court :
Irish Trivia Opener
AB, our most Irish heritaged Pax, lended YHC a beatdown consult with the below trivia opener.
YHC tried to give this nugget of info but the caffeine and nerves sometimes make me delete entire words . It came out “yours Truly Americas Best made these trivia “
Not accurate but I think “yours Truly , Americas Best” has NYT bestseller potential.
I’ll wait on my royalties check.
The Questions :
1.) Contrary to urban legends (possibly meant to deter tourists from fully experiencing the attraction), local teenagers and drunkards do not pee on this Irish landmark.
Answer: The Blarney Stoney
Goose picked this one up immediately and YHC Introduced the Blarney Stone…
We would roll a large dice with 6 options
1: Trivia
2: Trivia
3: Burpees
4; Merkins
5: BBSU
6 Bonnie Blair’s
We did assorted rounds of the above with 10 reps each and the below trivia mixed in . 10 merkins correct , 10 burpees in correct
2.0 question for the next generation of Llamas:
What’s the tagline for the cereal Lucky Charms?
-“they’re magically delicious “
**FNG (soon to be named Daryl Starwberry) took care of this one! Strong Work
According to legend what is a Leprechsuns occupation?
-shoemaker
What meat and vegetable dish is trademarked as the St Patrick’s Day meal.
-corned beef and cabbage
*late edition asked post beatdown
This common term defines something “broken into many pieces”
It comes from the Irish word, “Smidrini “
Smithereens !
Next was a clover Dora to honor the Prayer of St Patrick a
D work the quads into Smithereens!
In this prayer St Patrick asks God to remind him of his presence during all things.
(Excerpt below)
“Christ on my right, Christ on my left, Christ when I lie down, Christ when I sit down, Christ in the heart of every man who thinks of me”
So we would honor this with a Dora with multiple exercise positions .
Partnered up for :
100 Apollo Ohno (1:1) Lunge walk
200 Heels To Heaven – Nur
300 SSH- Mosey
YHC cut this a bit short so we would have time for some proper Irish competition
The Grand Finale
F3 Gaelic football
Rules
-goals scored by kicking the ball in , this can be accomplished by kicking the ball from the ground or dropping the ball from your hands to feet.
– You can only take 4 steps then must pass advance the ball by throwing or kicking BUT every time you pass you must pay in burpees kick (1 burp) or throw (3 burp)
– after score opposite team inbounds the ball
To be honest this was one of those F3 games that YHC thought could either be fun or turn into a raging chaotic lava dumpster of epic proportions (like a Maui thang but with a soccer ball if you need a visual)
But with the pax help on some minor tweaks (shout out to YJ for the “only kick goals in ” idea and Goose for switching us to shirts/skins) we settled in for a fiercely competitive yet tremendously fun game of Gaelic foosball.
One of YhCs many favorite things about F3 is watching Pax of all ages switch into their respective competitive modes…it’s pure magic.
Tough to describe but A few examples may suffice.
Goose turned into a field general seeing every angle of competitive advantage. Lox turned shimmering golden and started calling his quads “Goku” and “Gohan”. Dilly had eyes every where, seeing passes with Lebron like court vision and flexing lightning fast twitch pickle ball calves. YJ turned back the clock 20 years diving on saves, you can replace those joints later my friend . Valve was basically imported straight from Real Madrid and kept saying “Olayyy” and doing knee slides . Captain D’s transformed into Captain Defense locking up the opponents top talents. Ronnie’s eagle vision noted pax rule infractions from 100 yards away as he led a legion of 2.0 goalies. Suckle was simply every where , in every play floating butterfly like on defense, only out done by his offensive sting! Pope did athletic Pope things that only a Sports Science episode could break down. Smooth broke the all time Gaelic football assist record despite previously asserting he would only participate in American football.
The 2.0s scrapped about biting ankles and popping up from falls that would put their Dads in the stretcher.
No clue where we ended on the scorecard , yHC just knows he was ready to announce we were going to play till the street lights went out and our wives came looking for us but alas 7:30a came too soon.
A mosey back to the Flags (plural!) and some Mary to wrap a bow on it.
Announcements:
Getting rolling with some Brothers Keeper work.
Check GroupMe for updates and marathon commitments/decommitments.
COT and YJ prayed us out
Welcome Daryl Strawberry !!
(Genius name)
It’s a privilege to lead you men.
Epilogue
University Police
7:25 am
The officer walked back to his car slowly as he reported his findings to his superior on the radio.
“No arrest , not even a ticket to show! “
His hands were raised in disbelief.
“I don’t get it. The reports were clear. No vandals, no gangs, no lewd behavior…heck not even a mid life crisis !!”
He paused and stared out the window of his car as the men cheered at a final goal scored.
“ Just a couple men playing a hybrid soccer game…diving into stickers to do burpees and calling each other weird names …seemingly in the prime of their life. It’s crazy , my Psych 100 class says these are the guys that are lonely, depressed , and mad at the world and I tell you the crazy part …it looks fun …like they are really having fun”
“Huh…just lucky I guess “ the supervising officer quipped
“I don’t know ..” he said back as he watched them disappear into the gloom.
“Doesn’t seem like luck has anything to do with it ….”
SYITG
Dox
