F3 New Orleans

Category: New Orleans

  • 80 Miles to Sante Fe – from Paradox

    What comes to mind when you think of the absolute cutting edge of human performance? Ultra marathons, Saturdiddles, special ops training, Cardinal crab walking … I’m talking the outer limits of human capabilities here. Well men I have a new challenging feat of strength to add to this pantheon of greatness. A rigorous 5 day crucible that tests the mind, body, spirit, and even Rouses endless supply of 100% juice capri suns.

    Some only live through it to tell the tale…
    That’s how I found myself shoulder to shoulder with Econoline this week at 8:15am on a casual Tuesday in the Chackbay Catholic center, awaiting our first rotation of children.
    There we stood at the game station like 2 young hobbits awaiting 10,000 orcs at Helms deep. (Jk jk your children are all angels )
    It was about to begin…
    The great battle of our time..
    Being group leaders at…
    VACATION BIBLE SCHOOL

    Duke put down that snack pack and roll the footage . It’s VBS week!

    Warmup
    The usuals with spikes of chatter with Tanas gigi arrival and Gooses wearing a crosscut necklace of cloth but mostly silent focus on preserving precious oxygen with furtive glances at YHCs entire cone collection in the big field being guarded by BAPs. Sooooon….

    To kickoff the shenanigans YHC explained the similarities between VBS stations and F3 and that we would train as group leaders today to get a taste of the action.

    Opening ceremony

    Needs to be high energy , get the blood pumping but also you need to run full speed backwards because you forgot your 2.0 shoes and he has not a care in the world of being barefoot in public.

    Indian run around the big loop with Nur to the front to take us to the Chimney.

    Game Station #1
    Hula Hoop Relay race

    Break into 3 teams
    1 team mate does hula hop to and around cone
    Rest of Team does 4 merkins, 4 sqats , 4 SSH , 4 BBSU (4x4x4x4 (tM)
    Until all complete and must slide the hula hoop down the line.
    Enron clearly ignored the PDF and instructional video YHC sent him about the 4x4x4x4 and he still had questions. Ya hate to see that from the self proclaimed smartest man in the room.
    In the end Team Goose took the title and gifted the losers with 25 monkey humpers, in an unrelated note we now cannot go within 100 feet of the St Joe carpool pickup line.

    To the tennis court

    Every great VBS must have catchy songs that get implanted into your brain and this week we talked with the kids a lot about listening to God for your call…

    Music Station #1
    “Call me maybe” by Carly Rae Jepsen
    1 Merkin on “maybe” and “baby “
    Holding plank in a circle of pax and Pass the Hula Hoop with hands and feet.
    if it’s on you during call me maybe then you do 3 merkins.
    The pax got pretty good at passing that hula at lightning speed and WetTap has even adopted this as his on call theme song.

    Arts and Crafts Station #1

    Another vital part of VBS is a crafting station and no craft session is complete without rock paper and scissors. Pax paired up for escalating rounds of Rochamburpee with 2 more burpees for the loser each round till we reached 12. Not sure how everyone faired here but it seemed like burpees were enjoyed by all.

    Mosey to the Thunder dome

    Music Station #2
    Over the past 2 years selecting “F3 songs” has become a cherished pastime at YHCs house. There’s no definitive criteria but you know a really good one when you hear it. YHC recently stumbled upon the #SWT (Ronnie would later figure out this was Songs With Triggers) channel of f3 slack and uncovered an absolute gem.
    I needed a song to represent this weeks teaching of finding a quiet place to pray and it just so happened that Dean Summerwind had provided directions to a quiet lake where we could park just 80 miles from Santa Fe.

    “Parked by the Lake “
    Dean Summerwind
    Hold Al Gore with
    Bonnie Blair’s on “Parked”
    Tin Soldiers on “Santa Fe”
    Squats on “Lake”

    I hope it met Popeyes high expectations. It will be added to my F3 Song Hall of Fame as Diddle proclaimed it both right and just.

    Game Station #2
    Duck- Duck Goose
    Pax plank up in a circle facing outward. One pax selects a “Goose” by running around and tapping them on the head while the pax knock out plank related exercises (Merkin, plank jacks, MCs)
    The real honker himself got us started and we had Some close battles here with the Dawson 2.0s showing some serious evasive maneuvers.

    Arts and craft Station #2
    – color our ABCs
    PAX on our six with legs up to spell out VACATION BIBLE SCHOOOL (those Os are just too fun)

    Mosey to big field and as we turned the corner BAPS was seen and one pax yelled “is Jeaux here?”
    A simple question but it nearly derailed me as I couldn’t shake the image of YJ crouched in his van with binoculars and 1980s spy equipment writing down notes and mumbling “I knew it” .
    I composed myself and we arrived safely at the Grand Finale.

    Every VBS ends with a grand finale Friday where you showcase everything you learned through the week. So YHC unveiled the ultimate VBS obstacle course
    We split into two teams started some SSH and each team let one pax into the race at a time until they got to the minefield.
    BAPS provided “the final countdown” and We raced through..

    1. Dizzy bat
    2. Lunges
    3. Merkin minefield with CrawlBears (5 merkins if you knock down a cone)
    4. Broad jump burpees
    5. Suicide Trifecta (Nur, Run, Carioca)
    We grabbed our ever growing pile of gear and moseyed back to the flag for people’s choice Mary to represent your kids showing you all the stuff they learned during the week.
    Dr Ws, Penguins, Fred Merk, fire hydrants , WW1 sit-ups with Yote till the buzzer.

    Count o Rama, NamoRama
    GiGi found a new home with Ronnie and the Animal went back to the Goose nest with concerns that Crosscut was on his last microfiber.

    COT with continued prayers for the St Pierre family
    Goose prayed us out

    NMM

    YHC has a special place in his heart for VBS. Growing up it was always the mark of deep summer and where the seeds of my faith were first planted. (It’s where I picked up a love for relay races and obstacle courses!)
    It’s also a great reminder to me to search for simple yet profound truths and to strive for a childlike faith. Grateful for the men of F3 as we help each other walk a straighter path.

    PPS (Pickleteria PostScript) sponsored by Joola

    Following the beatdown several Pax gathered at the thunderDome for the first ever Pickleteria . Tana and Dilly graciously provided the pickleGear and all the fixings for Americas fastest growing game. In a thrilling opening match Team Dawson narrowly took down Threat Level Midnight 11-2. Acting manager of TLM Ronnie Lillich was optimistic for the teams growth during the post match interview: “Dox has a floppy wrist, plain and simple,I was carrying him. His mind was boggled about the kitchen and he lost his composure”. Sounds like TLM is going through a “rebuilding year” but a lot of league experts say Dox had a dollar store paddle. Ya hate to pickle with that.
    Well , It’s safe to say that the pickle fever has spread rapidly and the only question left is ..same time next week?

    SYITG
    Dox

  • Sleep well you Nutria – from Hokie

    Thursday, July 20, 2022, at an AO known as Wally Run. Only two individuals participated The Architect and Hokie. It seems like the rest of the Pax (participants) were absent or took a break due to enjoying some drinks on Wednesday night after the CSAUP (Completely Stupid and Utterly Pointless) event called Gnarly Nutria.

    During the event, The Architect took charge and ran the Wally Run, leading the run from start to finish and setting the pace only he could match.

    On the other hand, Hokie focused on taking care of his knees and tibialis (shin muscles) by performing knees over toes training. Knees over toes training is a specific exercise technique that targets knee health and strength.

    Additionally, in our COT with lifted up thr upcoming St. Vincent 500 in Thibodaux, as a future fitness challenge or race that the F3 guys should Clown Car.

  • El Diablo – from Pool Boy

    Temperature 84 degrees.

    After giving brief disclaimer, Mosey to bleachers near back of the playround.

    Warmups –

    SSH
    Imperial Walkers
    Grass Grabbers
    Mountain Climbers
    Arm Circles

    Round 1
    5 shoulder taps, 10 plank jacks, 20 merkins, 30 squats, run up and down bleachers, run around parking lot and back. 3x
    Round 2
    Mosey to mini levee, line up shoulder to shoulder with hand slap between pax. – Indian merkin ladder
    Round 2.5
    In teams of 2, bear crawl race.
    Round 3
    Under pavillion by the track, calisthenics consisting of dips, LBC’s, step ups etc
    Round 4
    Head to football field, 2 man relay. 100 yard sprint/jog; teammate does burpees

    Head to the Flag. COT

  • I Ain’t No Hollaback Q! – from Yankee Joe

    For the love of Pete! Kids, turn off that durn radio television thing! I can’t hear myself think. I’m trying to type a summary brief of my exercise regimen I did with some other fellers this morning.

    What? It’s not a TV, it’s a tablet? Are you stupid? Do you see a chisel? I don’t care if you’re bored. Go outside! In my day, we would play outside all day. Hell, we were forced to sleep outside with the dogs. We drank hose water and lit M80’s while holding them in our mouth. We punched each other in the groin to say hello and ate grass for a snack. AND we were damn GRATEFUL for it. Grateful I tell you! We were tough as nails!

    What’s that you say? You didn’t know the tinted glitter sunscreen was for Dad’s perfectly manscaped chest? I guess you expect me to drive a golf cart down 30A with un-coiffed chest hair?

    What? You didn’t know that blood orange Perrier came from a garden hose? Go back to Navarre Beach if you want La Croix. I’m not raising peasants here.

    What do you mean you’re scared of my avocado-cucumber bro-mask? You think this skin tone just HAPPENS? Now shut your cute little pie holes…I’m trying to decide which organic tea to brew before my online Pilates class. Freakin’ kids…the minute I break out my typewriter…

    —————————

    YHC was planning on maybe 5 – 8 PAX for a humid Tuesday Tuff. Paradiddle suggested that it was cute that YHC thought 8 was a big showing. The beatdown was optimistically built for 10. At 5:10, 8 PAX were mulling around…and then they kept coming (some in minivans, some in brand new Mercedes SUV’s). With a minute to spare, we hit 14! YHC quickly started recalculating (while panicking) the beatdown logistics. It was going to be messy. It didn’t help that Paradox was in YHC’s ear singing 8 mile lyrics. Was this my one chance to blow? Then a 15th figure strolling up. Another FNG! YAY, but holy crap!

    That said, WELCOME to Bone Thug! It’s nice to FINALLY have a medical professional in the PAX now. I can’t imagine walking up to 14 strangers in the dark. Thug’s F3 name seems appropriate on many levels.

    Also, it’s really inspiring to see Honeysuckle, A merica’s Best, and Popeye all turning into regulars and providing some much needed maturity. (Shut up, Paradox. You’re a thick candy shell.) Seriously, you guys bring great energy, mumblechatter, and in Suckle’s case, a bunch of cinderblocks. It should be notet that Popeye was a huge part of F3 Thibodaux gaining momentum in the first place. Huge T-Claps. I hope the fruits of your early labor were clear to see this morning (Goose’s pastel crop top notwithstanding).

    ——————————

    CONTEXT

    In the era of “millennial songs,” we were subjected to a never-ending barrage of mind-numbing, soulless, and insipid compositions that represent the epitome of artistic decay. These so-called “songs” epitomize everything that is wrong with the modern music industry, where substance is traded for superficiality, and originality is replaced by generic formulas that appeal to the lowest common denominator.

    Ok, ok…that’s a bit much…especially coming from a 44-year old YHC who at one time in 8th grade thought Young MC, Tone Loc, and Vanilla Ice were prophets; that “She Drives Me Crazy” by the Fine Young Cannibals spoke my truth, and that Z Cavariccis with 75 pleats (and tight rolled around the ankles) was THE fashion here to stay. Fast forward a few years, and we won’t even bring up Oasis, Dave Matthews Band, Counting Crows, or the Black Eyed Peas. Yikes.

    ——————————

    THEME

    ANYWAY, lately, there seems to have been some confusion about those anthems which define generations. Per usual, the Gen Xers and Gen Zers don’t really care. It’s the Millennials, however, who always seem to be BEARing a grudge against their foreBEARers.

    I don’t blame them. If I was coming of age with Avril Lavigne hitting the scene instead of Guns n Roses, or BEARing the brunt of songs like “I kissed a Girl” instead of “Even Flow,” or groups like Blink 182 instead of…well any other group…ever, I’d be harboring some deeply confusing issues too. I’d be BEARing my chest and screaming “WHY oh WHY?” Of course, I’m BEARly scratching the surface here. But seriously, Justin Bieber? Just unBEARable.

    So, as Paradox (fine, he’s a medical “professional”), who is diligent about the PAX wellbeing, would say…”The PAX needed healing.” BUT what kind of bridge could we bring to BEAR that would connect our generations? Could these 30-somethings BEAR to hear the truth? Or would we have to BEAR down and drop reality bombs? BEAR. BEAR. BEAR.

    YHC’s 2.0’s offered the answer as they sang along to ‘We’re Going on a Bear Hunt.” The story was originally introduced in a 1989 book and then remade in a 2015 cartoon, neatly connecting the Gen Xers, Millennials, Gen Zers, and every other group in between and following.

    So to take these important steps in healing, we’re going on a millennial…er I mean a BEAR hunt this morning. F3 style.

    Call it a journey through lyrical crap.

    —————————-

    THE BEATDOWN

    Thang 1: Climbing the Mountain (Stage to Sidewalk)

    We’re goin’ on a millennial hunt,
    We’re going to catch a big one,
    I’m not scared
    What a beautiful gloom!
    Oh look! It’s a scarrrry mountain shaped like a desperate cry for help!

    Can’t go under it,
    Can’t go around it,
    Got to go through it,
    Gotta go over it with a bunch of stupid coupon exercises!

    Burpee penalty – Avril Lavigne – Skatr Boi (penalty averted by Paradiddle)

    10 man makers (45 sec)
    20 overhead presses (40 sec)
    30 curls (20 sec)
    40 merkins (60 sec) /
    30 curls (20 sec)
    20 overhead presses (40 sec)
    10 man makers (45 sec)
    Al Gore cheering on SIX

    —————————–
    Thang 2 – Narrow Pass (Sidewalk to Stage)

    We’re goin’ on a millennial hunt,
    We’re going to catch a big one,
    I’m not scared
    What a beautiful gloom!
    Oh look! It’s a really narrow pass, so narrow, too narrow for north louisiana egoes to pass through!

    Can’t go over it,
    Can’t go under it,
    Can’t go around it,
    Got to go through it – with a crap load of leg exercises and burpees!

    Teams of 8
    First two teams Block and Bears to mid point; other teams chilcutt peter parkers
    – 20 apollo ono’s 2:1 – all (1 min)
    – 20 prisoner squats
    – 20 bonnies 2:1
    Block and Bears to Stage (next group goes when prior team begins last exercise)
    – Chilcutt peter parkers while waiting

    —————————-
    Punishment Song (just because) – LMFAO – I’m Sexy and I Know It
    – SSH on verses
    – Burpee on “look at that body”
    – Star jump on “I, I, I work out”
    – Hillbilly walkers on “I’m sexy and I know it”
    – Fast high knees on “wiggle, wiggle, wiggle”

    Coupon mosey to top track half point of field, roadside

    —————————–
    Thang 3 – Cross the field (Across short field, roadside)

    We’re goin’ on a millennial hunt,
    We’re going to catch a big one,
    I’m not scared
    What a beautiful gloom!
    Oh look! It’s a beautiful field full of the dying culture of 30 somethings!

    Can’t go over it,
    Can’t go under it,
    Can’t go around it,
    Got to murder bunny through it!

    Burpee penalty – Katy Perry – I Kissed a Girl (didn’t get a chance to play, because YHC is old and forgot)

    Murder bunny to halfway
    – 25 coupon LBCs
    – 25 coupon flutters (2:1)
    – 25 freddie mercs (2:1)
    Murder bunny to street

    ———————————
    Thang 4 – Traverse the River (Across street)

    We’re goin’ on a millennial hunt,
    We’re going to catch a big one,
    I’m not scared
    What a beautiful gloom!
    Oh look! It’s a raging river of passive aggressive Chackbay snark!

    Can’t go over it,
    Can’t go under it,
    Can’t go around it,
    Got to rifle carry coupons through it!

    Burpee penalty – Gwen Stefani – Holla Back Girl (didn’t play because of time constraints)

    Rifle carry/Groucho Walk (side to side squat) across street
    Mosey left to corner, leaving Cindies

    Uh, oh! It’s dark in here.
    I feel something,
    It has lots of quaffed hair!
    It’s soft like a douche bag! With two heads!
    AHHHHH It’s Justin Bieber and Sean Kingston!

    Song: Eenie Meenie (aka top five worst songs in history)
    – Plank jacks on intro (you need to read this crap)
    – Mtn Climbers on Mind, Time, Wind
    – Groiners on refrain

    —————————————
    COT, GiGi was passed from Superfun(d) to Paradox (again), we welcomed Bone Thug, and Wet Tap prayed us out.

    One of YHC’s research streams is around market segments and generational trends. Of course, it is helpful to have reference points as styles and fashions come and go. At the end of the day, however, it’s just not that complicated. The good stuff sticks around and the crappy stuff dies. It’s always been about quality. So, no need to continue this generational feud. We just need to be on the same page that high quality music disappeared around 1994.

    Today was a bit of a dumpster fire, but I am genuinely grateful and always humbled to fight the good fight with each of you.

    SYITG,

    Yankee Jeaux

  • Beating Tires and Rocking Out to Skynyrd – from Smooth Operator

    Beating tires and rocking out to Skynyrd
    7/17/23
    Attendance
    Goldilox
    Paradox
    Goose
    Pope
    Cardinal
    Goats in the Machine
    Paradiddle
    Econoline
    FNG
    Smooth Operator

    I have always been a big fan of Lynyrd Skynyrd since I was a kid. Their music reminds me of hanging out with my dad whom always seemed to have their music on in his old truck. The other day I was feeling stuck in a rut and decided to let Spotify try and help clear my head. “4 walls of Raiford” by Lynyrd Skynyrd came on and instantly gave me a fresh new prospective on my problems. My little problems weren’t anything compared to this poor Vietnam Vet whom got caught up in a bad spot and ended up doing time in Raiford prison in Florida. Anyway lets get into it.

    I showed up this morning after a long wet night at work, but was feeling pretty good with a couple new additional props for this mornings beatdown. Lox showed up first with a FNG, and after that it was like the PAX flood gates opened up. Around 5:10 Goats in the Machine decided to grace us with his presence, it’s good to have you back buddy. I was hoping to see an ole Chevy pulling in to the subdivision around 0518 but I guess we will have to wait till Tuesday Tuff to start Frenchy’s comeback.

    Warm ups went as follows:
    SSH
    Imperial Walkers
    Windmills
    Arm circles
    Cherry Pickers
    Mountain Climbers

    Cadence left something to be desired, I’ll go ahead and blame in on sleep deprivation along with the rest of the beatdown explanation.

    THANG

    After warm ups, we went up on the stage and picked out a cell mate. For here little JBL came to life with 4 walls of Raiford. One half the cell would be doing box jumps and the other would be doing merkins and we would switch in between verses. This proved to be pretty tough with the long dragged out guitar solos and YHC thought it was perfect. No reason to get in a hurry.

    After the song finished we moseyed to the bumper and back to the flag where YHC set up 2 tires I found on side the road along with an 8 lb. maul and a really cool looking 8 to 10 lb. axe hammer which was a YHC impulse buy. The second part of the thang was a hammer swing timer which YHC felt the need to put in there to signify the digging ditches for the chain gang portion of the beatdown. While the PAX would be doing AMRAP of Man-makers . Half the PAX would be responsible for getting 20 hammer swings done on the two old tires. This worked pretty good but I probably forgot to mention it the first time around that only half the PAX needed to swing since all the PAX ended up beating them tires like they was the devil.

    After this we Moseyed around the mini track and headed back to the Jailhouse (Stage) for another Jail cell beatdown while JBL jamming to songs like Simple Man, Balled of Curtis Loew, Tuesday’s Gone, Sweet Home Alabama, Free Bird.

    The second round of the jail cell beatdown would go like this one cell mate would complete 8 reps of burpees while the other cell mate would complete 8 reps of prison squats. Then they would switch. After this we would move down to 7 reps and so forth until we reached 0 planking up upon completion. As a group we moseyed to the bumper and back to the tire beatdown for more hammer swings and man-makers. YHC must have reiterated the need for only half the PAX to give us the 20 reps of hammer swings to move on because we got it right this time. After we completed this along with more man-makers AMRAP, we moseyed around the track back to the jailhouse for today’s final round of jailhouse beatdown.

    The final round of Jailhouse beatdown went similar to the initial round. It was set to the song “Mr. Banker” and the exercises to complete would be Apolo Onos and Freak Nasties switching in between verses again. After switching 3 or 4 times YHC showed the PAX mercy and we abandoned the Freak Nasties due to YHC wanting to get those glutes some extra work.

    From here, we had roughly 5 minutes left and YHC felt a strong pull to beat those tires again so that’s what we did. The other half the PAX beat on some tires 2 by 2 while all the PAX did more man-makers until 0559 when YHC called it.

    Announcement

    Animal shirt went from Econoline to a well deserving Pope.
    Our new FNG supplied by LOX was given the name Longhorn due to being from Oklahoma and a Sooner fan.

    COT and Pope prayed us out.

    Thanks to everyone who came out and put in the work, y’all kicked this beatdown’s butt.
    SYITG
    Smooth Operator

  • As faithful as the sunrise – from Kenna Brah

    Warm ups –
    SSH x 20
    Imperial Walkers x 15
    Upper Body Twists x15
    Abe Vigoda – pause for 4 ct on each leg X10 each leg
    Low Slow Squat x15

    Main Thang –
    All about the Benjamins – 100 reps of various exrcises
    Tote a sufficiently difficult rock to the Parking Lot
    Line up abreast
    Rd 1
    Curls with Rock x 25, Lunge Walk 25 steps, Merkins 25x Lunge Walk Back 25 Steps – repeat 3 more times
    Early finishers were treated to some Mary while we waited for the 6 – this was peer lead, and impromptu by the pax

    20 Sec Recovery count –

    Rd 2
    Rows 25x, side shuffle 25 steps, 25 4ct Mountain Climbers, Side shuffle back 25 steps – repeat 3 more times

    Brief recovery Mary while we wait for Rudy- ahem – the 6. He’s fussy about form ya know.

    Rd 3
    OHP 25x, backwards run 25 steps and back 25 steps, – 2 more X , return rocks and COT. Oh, we forgot Rudy!! Ware Eagle has him in tow and brings him home. Grumpy for the disrespect we showed. That’s on me.

  • Ride the Horse (even if you’re doing it wrong) – from Paradiddle

    YHC has been tempted recently to move on from his usual loosely Ted Lasso themed beat downs, but the PAX have seemed to enjoy not knowing what will come from the mustached man – smiles, positive vibes, 50 too many burpees married to nonstop cardio? What could be in store for this beatdown…

    YHC arrived early (a rare sight) to find Sooth’s empty truck in the shell lot. After looking for Smooth for a few, YHC had some intel to gather. YHC mosey’d to ED White’s football stadium to get a good grasp on the scale of the field – he’d need to retreat one since the turf is still being replaced. Returning to the lot, YHC found some of the pax had begun to arrive – Enron, Lox, Smooth, Lil Cuz w/ 2.0. Conversation started as YHC had brought the newest FNG this morning – a prime day special that has expanded our JBL fam. With Dox’s arrival came cones, and with the help of Lox a makeshift 100 yd football field was created.

    Mumble chatter was strong and we began the usual warmups accompanied with the regular “How does this count off go again?” Debates were held about whether it’s “starting position” or “ready position” – some claiming to have done their F3 online research. SSH, Imperial Walkers, grass grabbers w the infamous clap, arm circles, cherry pickers, and mountain climbers.

    YHC introduced the legend of Leeroy Jenkins – a gamer who in 2005 singlehandedly caused the implosion of a well thought out WoW raid. Yelling Leeroy’s name today would earn the pax a 100yd sprint and 5 burpees. Every man could call upon Leeroy once in the beatdown if he so wished.

    We grabbed coupons and mosey’d to the field with Chicago serenading us and “Saturday in the Park” filling the air through the newest JBL member.

    YHC wasn’t finished explaining thang 1 before Coyote yelled the first Leeroy. The pax sprinted the length of the field and finished the burpees. We had to get back to our starting position, so it was an additional 100yd sprint back. It was immediately apparent that Leeroy might have been a mistake, as YHC had promised the pax a beatdown without much running. (I’ll admit – Leeroy was a last minute addition)

    _____

    Thang One
    Hindenburg
    An exercise on each of the four corners of the field, sprinting one corner to the next. YHC had five rounds planned, but in a last minute audible, reduced it to three.
    Round One – 5 Burps
    Some lovely soul called a Leeroy
    Round Two – 20 LBC’s
    Round Three – 30 Plank Jax
    Pax completed the Hindenburg with ease, but mumble chatter was filling the air and it was apparent that resentment towards YHC for the amount of running was on the rise. Before thang two, an additional Leeroy was called. Already up to three. Insanity. The pax was willingly engaging in MORE running and blaming YHC.

    _____

    Thang Two
    Death of the Merkin’
    This is a Diddle Original.
    You see, after Cardinal’s brutal Millennial on Thursday, Lox expressed his desire to expand his chest and his capacity for merkin’s, thus we would work on our merkins.

    We’d perform Manmaker Merkin’s (according to the Lexicon, but debated in name by Goose) – High plank with coupon (cinders are great) laying to your right side. Perform a Merkin. Reach under your body with your left hand and drag the coupon to the opposite side of your body.

    5 Manmaker Merkins on each 10 yd line, then a lunge walk with coupon to the next yd line, all the way to the 50. 25 in total, 50 yds coupon lunge in total. Pax pushed through, admittedly some pax tossing their coupons under their body with sheer frustration (downright impressive). Econoline pushed through and finished strong, not giving in to the temptation to walk instead of lunge (Hell yeah – you’d earn the animal shirt, I believe, because of your sheer will power in these moments – props)

    Pt. 2 of Death of the Merkin
    Pump Jack
    A partner pushup competition til failure – one partner performing 5 pushups while the other holds high plank and “coaches” the other. Upon failure, lunge walk around other pairs and coach them encouragingly until they reach failure.
    Pax performed these in cadence with YHC leading the count. No idea what we ended up getting to, but it was a higher number than YHC anticipated. Majority of the pax stayed in the fight all together the whole time. Props to Lil Cuz, the only person I could see (and partner), as he fought through the craziest case of arm trembles I’ve ever seen. The man didn’t stop, didn’t make a sound – WHAT! I believe someone called Leeroy here. What a move.

    It was here that my extremely loose theme came into play as Smooth asked if I had any Ted inspiration to bestow on the pax – I did! YHC had practiced for this moment, and yet still couldn’t remember it. Out came the trusty iPhone – “Taking on a challenge is a lot like riding a horse, if you’re comfortable while you’re doing it, you’re probably doing it wrong”. – Ted to Beard

    Thang Three
    Plank Hurdles
    This was YHC’s version of “fun” for the morning. A three team relay with the team starting in plank in the end zone, partner one runs to the 10 and planks, partner two emerges from plank and hurdles over partner 1 (like a gazelle) and planks up on the 20, partner three over partner one and two and lands on the 30…etc until everyone ends in the opposite end zone. This proved to be fun and challenging, with certain pax taking liberties with their form as it quickly became competitive. Gazelle award goes to America’s Best, with the best most consistent form in hurdles AND lunges.
    Somewhere here Leeroy Jenkins was called. We were dead, but we ran it.
    After Leeroy, we returned for a second face-off of plank hurdles. Thank you Linkin Park for accurately describing our feelings as we planked up again.

    Following was one of the slowest mosey’s with coupons back to the shovel and flag. I’ve never seen the pax move that slow – I’ve never seen myself move that slow. I couldn’t make the legs move any faster.

    Pax circled up around the flag, exhausted, moist (so so so moist), and ready for shade that was nowhere to be found. COT and prayer led by Goose.

    Men, great work. This pax has not stopped pushing. We are growing. And for some reason, you chose the Diddle Death March (disguised as Leeroy Jenkins) all on your own on this lovely Saturdiddle (props to Dox to coining the phrase).

    Til the next time,

    SYITG.
    Paradiddle

  • Respect! – from King Kong

    Six brave Pax woke up to this hot, humid summer day in mid July to challenge themselves with heavy bells. Douille noticed the average age for the day……. 59.5 years old….. rounding it up to “Respect” status….. only being pulled down by a youngster named King Kong at 45.

    No one was late to the workout since Willie was out of town. We started off with the following warm-up exercises:

    Self Love x 10 IC, Windmills x 10 IC, Arm Circles x 10 IC, Hill Billies x 10 IC, Imperial Walkers x 10 IC, SSHs x 20 IC, Halo x 10 both directions, Around the World x 10 both directions.

    The Thang 1

    Rows x 12 (both sides) in slow cadence
    Goblet Squats x 12 in slow cadence
    Leg Raises x 12 in slow cadence with the bell

    Self Love x 10 IC followed by 20 SSHs IC.

    Curls x 12 in slow cadence
    Goblet Alternate Lunges x 12 in slow cadence
    American Hammers with the Bell x 12 in cadence

    Self Love x 10 IC followed by 20 SSHs IC.

    Overhead Presses x 12 in slow cadence
    Goblet Jump Squats x 12 in slow cadence
    LBC’s with the Bell x 12 in slow cadence

    Self Love x 10 IC followed by 20 SSHs IC.

    Curls x 12 in slow cadence
    Alternate Step Ups x 12 in cadence
    American Hammers with the Bell on the ledge x 12 in cadence

    Self Love x 10 IC followed by 20 SSHs IC.

    The Thang 2
    Dora 1, 2, 3
    Exercises were 100 Kettle Bell Swings, 200 Kettle Bell Taps, 300 Flutterkicks with the Bell.

    While one Pax was doing the reps, the other Pax was walking with the Bell (dealers’ choice) to the parking lot and back.

    The Thang 3
    We finished the day with wall-sits with the bell. While in squat position, we held the bell overhead and forward arm extension position for one minute.

    COT
    Blessed and grateful. Praying for safe travels as many Pax are traveling next few weeks to round up summer vacation. Praying for Gabby’s trip – “Walmart at the Sea” Cruise.

    PAX tried a new breakfast spot – Slim Goodies. Gabby joined us after Rene.

  • Z90s and some pax did a pretend workout – from Bolt

    YHC dug back in the annals (reread the word without your filthy mind filter) of previous Qs for something I hadn’t done in a bit—Z90s it would be with the exercises tweaked and the modes of transportation unchanged. Like many NOLA pax who are also part of the coolest generation on planet Earth, I became an adult in the 90s so this workout title includes a Z for many 90s reasons: Z Cavaricci pants, it’s the end of the alphabet like we are the last generation to not suck, it’s the movement pattern we would follow around the bases, I could go on but on to the Thang which followed the usual warmorama stuff/soundtrack followed Morning Calls for the absent Rudy.

    Z90s: 5 thru 20 reps/4 exercises, mix movement between between bases each round, mosey back to home. Skip rule in effect and an all 90s club mix playlist which guaranteed penalty burpees; it was far worse than the playlist I actually created if u can believe that!

    Round 1 (bear crawl between home, 3rd, 1st, 2nd): burpee 5x, Cracker Jacks (frog>star jump>frog) 10x, merkin 15x, plank jacks 20x

    Round 2 (crab walk): burpee, air squats, Peter Parker, American hammer 2:1

    Round 3 (crawl bear): burpee, Bonnie Blair, Parker Peter, overhead air presses

    It was at this point I gave the pax the option for Qs choice or a fourth round and after some debate Frac and The Architect split, pushing Bogey to be the swing vote, opting for round 4 (would’ve been Mary plus decadie of death) and there was mention of dancing so I called an audible on the movement between bases.

    Round 4 (dance moves of pax choice): burpee, R/L side squats, diamond merks, mountain climbers 2:1

    Back to flag—NOT. At the flag I noticed we had two minutes to spare so not wanting to cheat the pax out of their money’s worth we ventured to the edge of the outside track shoulder to shoulder to put on a show for the Old Metairie muckity mucks: Humping of the monkey followed by pleasing of the wife followed by O rings just to solidify the theme for the obviously horrified onlookers.
    In retrospect, I either forgot how much Z90 can suck or it was a poor choice given all the workouts I haven’t been to recently and only kicked my own ass. I’ll let the pax chime in. Winded, honored, and grateful. COT.

  • Battle of the Ages – from Cardinal

    YHC found himself the victim of guerrilla warfare. An unknown PAX threw YHC’s name on the Q sheet unbeknownst to him (there was verbal chatter about taking said Q, admittedly). But always ready to face a challenge, a beatdown was put together. The chatter on the GroupMe focused on the wide age difference between the old fogeys and the young bucks, so a “battle of the ages” was crafted to settle the debate.

    Warmup of the usual fare kicked us off (SSH, WM, IW, FAC/BAC/CP, SL).

    Thang 1 was a celebration of a recent 21st birthday among the PAX (T-claps to French Horn, who was only at “hc” status and thus nowhere to be found). We started with 3 rounds of 21s – first round was high knees, second round was grass grabbers with the clap, and third round was Bobby Hurley’s. YHC had not even thought of a penalty because he was so confident that the PAX could count to 21 with ease. However, that proved not to be the case. EVERY SINGLE ROUND was failed by at least one of the PAX (although the first round may have been intentionally sabotaged by GiGi). A hastily created penalty was a lap around the Civic Center. They say education is bad in Louisiana….and YHC can confirm that.

    Thang 2 was an homage to two of the greatest hits when these 40+ fogeys were in their prime – Thunderstruck and No Scrubs (which was at the top of multiple lists YHC found while researching, despite a near unanimous disdain for the song). Thunderstruck was a simple burpee on “Thunder”, and No Scrubs was holding Al Gore while doing a jump at each “no” (which was a lot).

    Thank 3 closed us out with the triumph of the greatest generation – the Millennial. It involved 10 rounds of 100 reps each, with a 100m mosey in between each round (thus adding up to 2000 total reps/meters). However, due to YHC’s poor time calculations, we only got through 6 rounds before we had to call it – SSH, LBCs, Merkins, Lunges, Oblique Crunches, and Mountain Climbers. YHC noticed the total silence during this entire thang – until Goose started his oblique crunches, which garnered widespread admiration at the form and technique. Comparisons were made to drilling for oil as well as cattle roping. Make of that what you will.

    Dox prayed us out after COT and some announcements about the second annual SV500 – supporting a great charity in the Houma-Thibodaux area next month. Check us out and sign up! https://f3thibodaux.regfox.com/the-st-vincent-500-2023

    Always a blessing gentlemen. Might be some more Cardinal Q’s on the horizon.

    SYITG

    Cardinal