F3 New Orleans

Category: New Orleans

  • Lions, Gazelles, Sledding, and Striding – from Bolt

    12 pax posted in the gloom looking for and providing accountability; some ran, some KnOTted, some rucked. YHC wanted to test if there was an impact on speed if one is chased vs being chased so Lions and Gazelles was born.

    The disclaimer was given and off we went while the ruckers were informed they’d have a one minute head start to account for the estimated difference in pace between the lion (YHC) and gazelles (them) so I did burpees (it IS MABA month after all). Would it take more or less than a mile to catch them?

    I could feel parts of my legs I didn’t know existed right away so clearly being the lion impacted my pace but what about the gazelles? I expected to find out in about 15 minutes. Unbeknownst to me, the gazelles did an un-gazelle thing and hid in the bush until the lion passed (instead of “running” as they’re built to do).

    YHC hit the first lengthy straight away and presumed the figures in the distance were the gazelles (“ignore the new leg sensations or starve, lion” was my mantra) and then I lost sight of them. As the turn near Metaire Rd came I realized, so I thought, they’d altered from the agreed upon course; none the matter, mile one was coming and Siri shared the pace was 14’05”–keep pushing. The next turn came and the straight away betrayed the gazelles’ course altering—vindication…and time to eat!

    It was close to mile two before I’d catch them and just before the feast, the gazelle known as Charmin confessed their TWO dastardly deeds. Another ruck will be required to know how YHC’s pace is impacted as a gazelle.

    Thanks for the new pace, gazelles. COT.

  • Run, Maverick, or-whatever-your-name-is,Run – from Goose

    PAX: Paradox, Enron, Piccadilly, Smooth Operator, Honey Suckle, Safety Valve, Lil’ Cuz
     
     
                YHC had this beatdown written out since early December and had in mind for a while only that the day of it would be the Monday after Yankee’s Goose Grinch version 2.0. YHC was conscious of its closeness to Christmas, until America’s Best broke the ice with the Goose commemorative on the Saturday before the fourth Sunday of Advent (one would think that someone would have at least done a Dox-themed beatdown by now). It wasn’t until the Friday before that YHC realized that that Monday was New Year’s Day and had to turn it over to Goose.
                YHC arrived at the Stage on a bike (my old man being in Lake Charles) early to map out the sight and determine the specifics of the morning’s work, and saw Dox’s and Enron’s vehicles, but the gloom was empty. YHC made sure Dox wasn’t watching from a concealed position, grabbed some cones out of his truck and proceeded to determine the location of a bothersome amount of anthills while setting up.
                Smooth pulled up right as YHC caught a glimpse of Dox and Enron running on Rich Man’s Loop—Dox continues to show the enthusiasm he has shown for so many announcements thus far (“Yeeah… Run-Cajun-Run comin’ up, talkin’ with NOLA, ten-man teams, count your best seven if French Horn’s on your team…); wait until right before to warm up? Yeah right!
                Warmarama (honestly, who really is legitimately concerned with which exercises we warmed up with? YHC can’t recall them anyway…): Valve and Dilly rolled in, YHC attempted to set the mood for the intended theme—Tom Cruise’s Top Gun Maverick—and we Indian-ran       (-runned?), with the six dropping for 5 2:1 Freddy Mercuries, to right about quarter-mile mark on the mile route.
                It was then that YHC took a head count on how many of the PAX had watched the movie in order to get a “justified” amount of reps for penalty burpees. YHC’s heart sank very slowly as one or two out of eight slowly raised their hands. After no one had the foggiest idea what Maverick’s real name was, YHC decided to toss the theme and just go for it.
    Thang 1 consisted of a short, easy mosey to the first left turn, a turn and an increase to about 60-70% speed until the stop sign, then a final left turn and a full sprint until failure/the next stop sign. Suckle stayed close behind YHC for most of the full run and had him really pushing to avoid being passed up. PAX executed a recovery mosey to the grass next to the ex-coupon corral.
    Thang 2: all PAX partnered up and positioned themselves around an approximately 35×35 cone square and, on “go,” completed 5 T-merkins each to get the “plane” off the ground before entering the circle. Once in-bounds, PAX had to work together to “target-lock” all other opponents, a “target lock” achieved by tapping enemy PAX on the middle back (YHC did try to preserve the theme a little). Once tagged, PAX held plank outside the circle, completing 200 merkins (YHC audibled to 100) if both partners were eliminated. PAX also couldn’t stop moving under penalty of 4 dolphin-hops, so at times the environment seemed like a bunch of grown men were playing Minecraft in-real-life. Dox/Cuz ultimately emerged victorious, running victory-laps around the PAX doing merkins.
    Thang 3 originally involved baseballs and a 30-yard sprint or two, but despite all the buildup to this morning, YHC forgot baseballs. YHC brought the PAX back to the flag and resorted to the good ol’-fashion Dora, with 100 merkins, 200 Freddy Mercuries and 400 SSH, with partner 2 running to the bumper and completing 5 star-jumps. Bonus points for those who actually remembered the star-jumps o the first go.
    That left about eight minutes of Mary; COT—please keep me and everyone else going on the March for Life in your prayers and pray for an answer to ours—and Cuz prayed us out.
    YHC was having flashbacks of the last time I Qed—I had to adapt essentially the entire beatdown to fit the Chimney at the Peltch after both the Low field and the IEW field were closed or occupied. YHC and all Qs who have found themselves in similar dilemmas are living reminders of the simple phrase, “none of us are professionals.”

  • Like a Virgin – from Space Cowboy

    Thankful for the opportunity to be VQ and I am looking forward as Q for future beat downs. We even had a special “Uptown” guest @gabrielle who EH’d and brought me in as a FNG at KennaRidge back on Nov 15. I appreciate all of the support.

    Started on time with Disclaimer
    Mosey to playground
    Special guest was late so burpees x3 for all PAX

    Warmerama IC
    Slow Squats x 10
    High Knees x 15
    Toy Soldiers x 10
    Forward lunges x 10
    Forward Circles x 15
    Backward Circles x15
    Seal Claps x 10
    Chinooks x15
    Hillbilly’s x10
    Plank Walk Outs x5

    Mosey to JPAX
    Round 1 – 6 min AMRAP
    Merkins x 12
    Dips x 12
    Shoulder Taps x12
    Burpees x 12
    Run up JPAX stairs down ramp

    Round 2 – 6 min AMRAP
    Air squats x 12
    Forward lunges x12
    Box jumps x12
    Mountain Climbers x12
    Run up JPAX stairs down ramp

    Round 3 – 4 min AMRAP
    Dips x12
    Box jumps x12
    Shoulder taps x12
    Air squats x12
    Run around JPAX pebble pond

    Mosey back to Playground
    Superman with Extensions x10
    Peter Parkers x10
    Parker Peters x10
    Captain Thors x10

    Round of Mary: Crunchy frog; Tin Snips; BBSU; Penguins; Reverse planks with leg lifts; 3 count plank holds; wife pleasers

    COT
    Announcements
    Intentions: Wedding Planner’s daughter, Big Willie’s mom, War Eagle’s new baby daughter
    Prayer

  • Do Hard Things? – from Hawgcycle

    I left my house this morning in the cold rain. I was greeted at a flooded Pontiff Playground by Frac, Kenner Bruh, and Mambi. KB and Mambi Rucked. Frac and I did an 800 meter warm-up followed by five 800 meter repeats. Frac prayed us out

    Later this morning a separate group of F3 guys are meeting at CCs, layered in warm, dry cloths sipping steaming hot lattes as the study the book Do Hard Things. Let’s hope they learn something.

  • Who needs the 5th Grade – from Smooth Operator

    Attendance
    Lil Cuz
    Yankee Jeaux
    Popeye
    Wet tap
    Safety valve
    Goats in machine in spirit

    This morning YHC was excited to get back into the fold after Christmas and hunting season have hurt my posting numbers. YHC arrived at 0505 and the PAX started rolling in.

    Warmarama
    – SSH
    – Imperial walkers
    – Arm circles thanks to Yankee Jeaux
    – Cherry Pickers
    – high knees
    – Butt kicks
    – Mosey to coupon corner

    My first posting was 1/12/23 and I wouldn’t have done it if not for Goats in the Machine who happened to have the q that day. So, this beatdown is a modified version of Goats’ best work in my opinion.
    Thang 1: Billy Madisons
    • Perform 12 reps of and exercise and the run the walking path loop
    • Add 12 reps of and additional exercise to each round
    • Each round represents a grade level (you know like in the movie)
    • Preform as follows”
    o Kindergarten = Monkey Humpers
    o 1st grade = Burpees
    o 2nd grade = Chuck Norris merkins
    o 3rd grade = Apollo uno’s 2 is one
    o 4th grade = WW1 sit ups
    o 5th grade = Penguins

    YHC might have tweaked the exercises here, but I was really in the mood to do monkey humpers. Once we got to 5th grade, YHC decided to just jump to Thang 2 for time reasons. Who needs 5th grade anyway.

    Thang 2 Catch Me If You Can”
    PAX were partnered up in the field between The Stage walking loop and the subdivision entrance. The thang consisted of 5 squats while chasing each other via sprint and nerr for a couple laps across the field (edge of the parking lot to the white fence at the front of the subdivision).

    Apparently YHC was never paired up with someone who was fast because a nurring Safety Valve smoked YHC trying to sprint each time. The PAX knocked this one out.

    Thang 3: 11s
    • Freak Nasty & shoulder tap merkins/ Travel Bear Crawl

    This was performed on the bird poo riddled stage. Freak nasty’s on brick bench, bear crawl through the bird poo and shoulder tap merkins on the other side. Goats was on to something with this one, because this Thang kicked my butt. The PAX finished with 3 or 4 minutes to spare, so it was time to head to the sidewalk and do a couple burpees with the cars passing by. I believe we did 10 or so before 0600. We circled up and counted off, did announcements, and Yankee Jeaux prayed us out. Thanks for showing up for the manniversary and having fun.

    SYITG

    Smooth Operator.

  • Around DaHeartened by the enthusiastic showing of faithful HIM’s, YHC lead the PAX on a bisk mosey to the RockPile for Warmups SSH Imperial Walkers Side Lunge Stretch Arm Circles High Knees/ButtKickers MAIN THANG we toured the Metry Track, stopping at points of interest along the way. Start with med/large rocks #1 3 Sets 10 OHP 10 Curl 10 Row 10 SUMO Squat Leave Rocks as we found them #2 Mosey to the hill BearCrawl UP/Over 20 4ct SSH 4x Take a 30 ct while Hawg regailed us on the history of F3 in our region. #3 On stadium Seats Incline MErkins starting at 1, advance to next step 2, 3, etc all the way to the top Derkin 9,8,7 etc to the bottom 30 ct as Hawg continue to dig up treasured memories or the F3 Nola birth story. #4 At Playground 5 PULLUPS 10 L/R Step ups 3x Hawg continued …. #5 Under a shelter – using the tables On your back, legs over the edge, Low/High leg raises, 20ct People Chair on the poles, 30 sec ON the table, face down, rev leg lifts, 20 CT 3x And Hawg continued the story…. Mosey back to the flag for a short Turkish Getup lesson, then COT. Woild – from Kenna Brah

    October2014

  • Gold, Frankinscence, & Myrrhkins – from Paradox

    These the kings of Thibodaux are.
    Bearing gifts they travel so far.
    Field and fountain .
    Moor and mountain
    Following yonder star!

    Duke! Get the Camels!
    We’re going to Bethlehem
    Roll that beautiful beatdown footage !

    18 pax, with assorted 2.0’s, gathered on a chilly Peltch gloom for a journey…well actually 3 journeys (it’s well documented YHC has a problem maintaining a single theme during beatdowns)

    These leagues of learned men were hungry for a cardio feast and little did they know YHC had a buffet ready to serve from the East….hold it right there…I see you shaking your head…If you have a medical condition that is affected by wisemen puns, please exit this backblast. Your condition will not improve

    YHC rolled in on 2 camel humps after an extended garage search for Balthasar and Melchior but had to settle for jump ropes and tennis balls. YHC then moseyed into a gaggle of waiting magi and saw one foreigner towering above the rest. The unmistakable visage of Toe Loop had the pax in a frenzy and it was great to see him back in mix. Goose screeched in with the Van of Truth right on time. These pax were frankly incensed to get started and myrrhbe just myrrhbe we could go for gold today. Pleasantries, insults, and coupons were dispersed and we got down to business .

    Warmup
    Colder than expected winds from the east and a larger than expected group led YHC to some high rep counts to buy time for internal calculations. Plus the added benefit that nothing gets the pax full attention more than shoulder centric warmups.
    YHC then split the pax into teams of 3/4 (math is an elective at Homer High) each with a coupon and we headed for the thunderDome.

    Journey #1
    Two of today’s journeys would have clearly defined geographic destinations with goals to accomplish, lakes to sit by and a King to honor in the process. Before starting these though, YHC wanted to continue Gooses recent individual appraisals of our first F journey.
    YHC instructed the pax complete AMRAP burpees, merkins , bbsus.
    All for one minute each with a goal of establishing a benchmark for the year. We will return to these quarterly to assess progress and videos of form will be periodically sent to Sheriff Jeaux’s office for review.
    Lil Jon led us in the greatest of motivational hymns and all considered what they would turn down for.

    Journey #2 Santa Fe

    It’s the new year and if we want to set fitness goals then the first step is to know exactly where we are (see journey #1)
    The logical next step is to take a look at your own version of the mall map and find the arrow denoted “you are here “ then have a long think about where you want to be.
    Well, if there is any place in the world where I’d like to be to have a really deep think then it’s prolly an adoration chapel….BUT if there were a second place then it’s right next to that Lake …you know the one…it’s just 80 miles to Santa Fe.

    Dean Summerwind led us and we completed:

    “Santa Fe”- Bonnie Blair
    “Parked” Squat
    “Lake “ – Tin soldier
    With Al gore holds for maybe 5 seconds.
    The pax thoroughly enjoyed it with Popeye adding it to his “play at my funeral “playlist.

    Da Main Thang a Lang

    Journey #3 Arabia to Bethlehem

    We were feeling pretty dang good about ourselves with the 80 miles to Santa Fe so we set our sights a little farther …

    800 miles to make Santa Pay.
    That’s right , Jan 6 is STILL Christmas on my calendar you jolly fat man and we got 800 miles to get to baby Jesus so you better hop aboard , this pain train is leaving the station!

    3 Rounds of reps to complete as a 3 King Trio representing the aforementioned 800 miles .
    We would intermingle trivia and the fine arts to hone our wiseman skills. The trivia was hand selected from ABs learned league sample questions and YHC went easy on the pax with only the “ >50 percent correct” categories.
    There would be burpees on the line and we all know Cardinal does his best work when threatened with cardio. I mean seriously if you grew up a Dragon Ball Z nerd like YHC you can imagine ordinary Cardinal going full Super Saiyan when you challenge his heart with burpees but leverage it with trivia.

    Round 1 – 300 curls
    P1 coupon curls
    P2 run to the gate and back (timer)
    P3 Mountain climbers

    Trivia Round 1
    1.) Fill in the blank
    Mega, Giga, Tera, -blank-, Exa

    The pax made a few educated guesses here but took 5 burpees on the chin.

    2.) Herbaceous plant known as scientific name Trifolium
    Cardinal honored his namesake answering that St Patrick’s trinity Clover was correct and saved us from 5 burpees

    3.) a spiders organ used to produce silk ?
    Goose used his experience Cosplaying as SpiderDad to answer Spinneret and save us another 5 burps.

    After our penalty 5 burpees we stopped to consider what the magi may be feeling 300 miles in. Should we “turn around” ??

    JBL fired up a F3 Thib classic with Bonnie Tyler’s Total eclipse of the heart. (See GroupMe Diagram for belting vs crooning concerns)

    Flutter kicks on song
    Leg Raise on all Turn Arounds

    Round 2 200 Thrusters
    P1 jump rope
    P2 run around thunderdome building

    Round 2 Trivia
    1.) What word is the motto of a western US state, a brand of vacuum cleaner, and what Archimedes is alleged to have exclaimed before he left his tub and ran naked through the streets of Syracuse? EUREKA! Not sure who had credit for this one but they saved us 5 burps.
    2.) Dantes Divine Comedy is an epic poem divided into three canticas. The first is Inferno, what are the other two? PURGATORIO, PARADISIO – Cardinal for the win!
    3.) With the single exception of 1989 when Darrell Waltrip passed the checkered flag on Hoosier tires, every Daytona 500 winner since 1969 has driven on tires from what manufacturer. GOODYEAR
    Pax went 3/3 and enjoyed a pleasant 5 burpees.

    Round 3 – The Home Stretch
    This would have originally been 300 SSH but time required us to adapt the 300 miles into a full Rarajapari sprint home .

    With the goal of bringing your 3 gifts (pax , tennis balls , and coupon ) safely to Bethlehem (the flag) and a penalty of 5 burpees for the last team.
    YHC tried to be slick and set his team on a “around the crapper “ track but we got bogged down in the marsh only rescued by SuperFast and Maneaters willingness to dive into ankle deep puddles .
    It came down to the wire until AB took a dagger to our hearts with a Beckham bending kick to the flag.
    Team Goose took the win and a poorly led team dox ate the burpees.
    (Can someone teach me to futbol’ )

    3 minutes of Mary at the flag to finish where we wafted many backblasts and only dreamed of smelling sweeter incense.

    The counting
    The naming
    YHC gave ManEater the inVESTment for eating those coupon thrusters like they were breakfast muffins.
    Dilly Dilly prayed us out .

    RUN CAJUN RUN SIGN UP
    ITS ONLY A MILE – FEB 17

    Looking forward to an awesome year of progress with you chaps.
    It’s a privilege to lead.

    Epilogue

    The following is an excerpt from the award-winning biography of Dave Mitchell

    “America’s Best of Times”

    Written by the Pax of F3 Thibodaux

    Foreword by Squanto

    Chapter 18 : The Best of Us

    “We buried him on a Tuesday. Tuff was always his favorite beatdown ya know…its where he got his start. Goose at 106 years old, sang a stirring rendition of “Wind Beneath My Wings” followed by Valve ceremoniously sprinkling flourescein into the dirt. A light wind stirred the leaves on that quiet Virginian hillside. We had a few last moments to spend with our friend, the best of America. He looked solemn in that home built brewpon casket. Like any moment he would growl and do one last leg raise. The gray of his beard shimmering like the alpaca vest he had worn hundreds of times in a decorated life of service. We waited around at the grave after, swapping stories of beatdowns long blasted.

    Thats when the great granddaughter of the beast approached us with an envelope.
    “My great grandad had two requests in his will” she said.
    “#1 Make sure Yankee Jeaux is doing full extension Apollo Onos. I don’t know who Jeaux is but make sure he knows he was very adamant about this.
    And #2 Give this letter to the men. She opened it and read aloud.”:

    “In the waiting list of life you brothers were the wisest of men, my true learned league, never forget what we did, it was important”

    She hit play on a small musical device and walked off as we staired out across the fading twilight, the music played and somewhere in the distance a whippoorwill crooned softly.

    “Once upon a time I was falling in love. But now I’m only falling apart. Theres nothing I can do …a total eclipse of the heart

    SYITG
    Dox

  • Rocks & Reps – Dedicated to a Great Family – from Mayhem

    Disclaimer
    Mosey
    Warmerama – AV, GG, HB, PPP, MC, CC*, SSH, 9 burpees OYO
    *CC = Crab Cakes (Start from crab walk position, raise right hand and left leg, touch hand to knee. Return to starting position and repeat with opposite hand/leg. In cadence.)

    Mosey to rock pile, select rock of choice

    Mosey to the “flag football field”

    Shuttle runs with 5 stations (run to station, exercise, run start, etc.)

    Rd 1
    1st tree – 9 man makers
    2nd tree – 12 lunges w/rock 2is1
    3rd tree – 16 squats w/rock
    4th tree – 42 curls
    Dugout – 44 rows

    Intermission: Catch Me if you can to the end of the field and back
    Partner up, 1 PAX bear crawls while the other PAX does 5 burpees, chases and tags him to switch

    Rd 2
    1st tree – 9 tricep extensions w/rock
    2nd tree – 12 overhead press w/rock
    3rd tree – 16 burpees
    4th tree – 42 bonnie blairs
    Dugout – 44 merkins

    Mosey to the pavilion

    16 right leg step ups
    44 dips (Rudy picked the number)
    16 left leg step ups

    Circle of Mary
    16 Flutter Kicks
    42 LBCs (including a shout out to April)
    9 X-Factors
    16 Crunchy Frog
    16 wife pleasers

    Return the rocks
    Horses to the barn

    COT
    Announcements
    Intentions – Schaff Family, Scantron’s nephew, Wedding Planner’s daughter
    Prayer

    This beatdown was a dedication to the Schaff Family who was in a severe car accident on New Years Day. Mother of three, loving wife and my dear friend, April, did not survive. The number or reps represent the ages of the parents and three children: 9, 12, 16, 42, 44. Remember how important friends and family are in life, and to cherish each moment because you do not know when things can quickly change.

    https://www.gofundme.com/f/support-the-schaff-family-rebuilding-lives

  • Misty Mountain – 1-6-2024 – from Almonaster

    A stroll up “Beary” Mountain!

    PAX:

    – Gabby
    – Hawgcycle
    – Douille
    – Couch
    – Jingle Vader
    – Subprime
    – Brown Bag
    – O’Douls
    – Tiny Tot
    – 8-Ball
    – El Guapo
    – Rudy
    – Dax
    – Tubesteak
    – Tomahawk
    – King Kong
    – Willie
    – Almonaster

    Mosey to Palm Circle.

    Warmup:
    SSH – 20 IC
    Arm Circles -10 IC
    Reverse Arm Circles – 10 IC
    Imperial Walkers – 10 IC
    The Morpheus – 10 IC
    Balance on 1 foot for 10 seconds – each
    Grass Grabbers – 10 IC
    Windmills – 10 IC
    Mountain Climbers – 10 IC

    The Thang:

    Mosey to the Base of the “Beary” Mountain.

    Bear crawl up the ramp to the 2nd level.

    We proceeded with 10’s and 20’s exercises on each end of the Mountain. We traveled all of the way to the top deck and then descended down with two sets on the below levels.
    QUICK FACTS ABOUT BEARS
    There are around 180,000 to 200,000 brown bears worldwide. Most of them live in Alaska, Canada and Russia where the brown bear can still roam vast areas almost unpopulated by human beings and covered in forests.
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    The brown bear can reach a weight of between 150 and 370 kilogrammes depending on age, sex and season.
    – LBC’s – 20 IC
    Despite their weight, the animals can cover short distances at speeds of up to 50 km/h.
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    Brown bears are generally loners who will only seek a mate for short periods.
    – Squats – 20 IC
    At birth, bear cubs are blind and naked.
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    In the wild, these omnivores spend up to 16 hours a day looking for food, which is reflected in the saying ‘hungry as a bear’.
    – Freddie Mercury’s – 20 IC
    Bears have a particularly good nose: their sense of smell enables them to sniff food at a distance of several kilometres.
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    Brown bears in the wild are mainly active at dusk and at night.
    – Lunges – 20 IC
    In the wild, brown bears can reach a maximum age of between 20 and 30 years. In captivity, they can get even older.
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    The brown bear is the largest predator still living on the continent of Europe.
    – Penguins – 20 IC
    Descend two levels
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    – Bobby Hurley’s – 20 IC
    Descend one level
    – Burpees – 10 OYO
    – Vladimir Douille’s – 20 IC
    Back to Flag
    Birthdays
    Anniversaries
    Announcements
    Intentions
    Prayer

    Thanks for the opportunity to Lead!

  • Coin Flip – from Tinkles

    First Q of the year so I’ll try a backblast! Hoping it sticks!

    Looking for something a little different we tried a coin flip beat down. Heads = an exercise, Tails = an exercise. If head or tails is hit two times in a row, that exercise is retired and replaced with a new one. The concept has potential.

    Warm up: standard items.

    We started out with heads = burpees, tails = long running loop. First two flips were heads and burpees were dropped for squats. Everyone recalled the probability word problem from 5th grade and deduced this had a 1/8 chance of happening. The 4th heads in a row at a chance of 1/16 did not happen. The whole workout:

    10 burpees
    10 burpees
    30 squats
    Long loop
    30 squats
    30 squats
    Long loop
    15 jump squats
    Long loop
    Long loop
    15 jump squats
    Short loop
    15 jump squats
    15 jump squats
    Short loop
    30 Ukraines
    Short loop
    30 Ukraines

    Back to flag for announcements and intentions.