F3 New Orleans

Category: Backblasts

  • Naanu, Naanu – from Russo

    Not overly complicated today, as Pelican made his way back from Grizzly Adam’s cabin building territory, Coachella joined in for his third post of the week (YHC is very proud of his commitment, and am glad he’s become a regular since last year), and we had a Houston DR visitor in SlumLord, albeit a late arriver since he couldn’t find the crew at the A1C. We did give him the secret password of “Third Floor” so I hope he makes his way back soon.

    Warmup (all 10x)
    – arm circles
    – High knees
    – SSHs
    – Torso twists
    – Imperial walkers
    – Self love

    Thang
    Tabata (40 seconds on, 20 off) – alternating between benches and stage – 2 rounds at bench, 1 at the stage

    Benches
    Freak Nastys
    Step ups
    Bulgarian Split Squats
    Urkins

    Stage
    Merkins
    Flutter kicks
    Monkey humpers
    LBCs
    Plank jacks
    Squats
    Penguins
    Mountain climbers
    Lunges
    Gas pumps
    Cherry pickers
    Crunchy frogs
    Shroulder taps

    No Mary to speak of, but we did of course wrap with a circle, announcements, and prayer.

    Thank you gents for joining / reading. SYITG

  • I love the 80s – from Jose10k

    80s had the greatest entertainment

    YHC made his long-awaited return to the A1C after a tropical “vacation” that was equal parts Club Med and Gilligan’s Island, with a wardrobe sponsored by TSA incompetence. I arrived early because as usual, I couldn’t sleep. I picked 80s music on my Pandora, desperately trying to change up my playlist to appease Cowbell. I started thinking of all the excellent 80s movies: The Terminator, Flashdance, Weird Science, Maximum Overdrive, Tango and Cash, The Princess Bride, and The Last Dragon. Feel free to add your favorite in the comments, I can’t wait to see Hammer’s favorites. Anyways, I was happy to be back at the A1C. Don’t get me wrong, the Mandeville AOs are cool—kind of like a John Hughes movie where everyone is polite but the A1C? That’s pure RoadHouse—gritty, shirtless, and occasionally bloody. If you think about it though, Mandeville has its own 80s movie stars:
    Steve-Michael J Fox- come on, he’s definitely Marty McFly or Alex P. Keaton
    Russo-Robin Williams- He’s Mork mainly due to the excess hair or Roddy Pipper as Nada in They Live
    Shooter-Jesse the Body Ventura as Blain in the Predator- “I ain’t got time to bleed”
    Bushwacker-John Ritter as Jack Tripper in Threes Company

    Any who, I could continue, but I need to write this back blast….

    My boy Moby, youthful as ever, joined me in our ritual prethang laps. Then Darkwing swooped in, looking like he just stepped off the set of Batman, and it was time to party.

    Warm-ups kicked off while I regaled the crew with the highlight reel from my Caribbean adventure: Luggage: lost somewhere between Miami and “whoops. Swimwear: makeshift combo of sports bra and gym shorts which reminded me of Flashdance lol. Snorkeling with octopi and tropical fish gave off “The Abyss” type of vibe. Underwater sculptures and plenty of Caribbean rum.

    Then came the Ladder of Fun
    10 Sumo Squats – Drop it low like you’re trying to impress Prince in 1984. Sprint down the stairs and up the ramps like you’re chasing after One Eyed Willy’s treasure while listening to Cindy Lauper. Back at the top add 10 Lunges (2 is 1) – Richard Simmons would be proud of us so far, God rest his soul. Run again. Add 10 Monkey Humpers – Do y’all remember that goofy movie: Howard the Duck. Run Again. Add 10 Dirkins – Pushups, but make it Miami Vice—cool, cocky, and boat shoes with no socks, blazers with the arms rolled up. Run again. Add 10 Freak Nasties. Run again. Finish with 10 Burpees
    COT with intentions for Darkwings mother and mother in law. The Zoorich classic is tomorrow. Time for some pain and frisbee golf.

    “Pain fades, glory lasts, and monkey humpers are forever – Sir Richard Simmons

  • Mayhem Merkins Abound at Okwata – from Fracsac

    YHC signed up to Q at Okwata since the attendance has been strong. 10 others posted confirming the new trend, so YHC knew he had to deliver.

    Disclaimer given followed by a mosey to the Okwata sign for a warmup.

    Mosey to Mardi Gras fountain for double shots with Jack Webb at the barre. Speaking of which, where is surge??

    Mosey to the corner of Canal for 4 corners BLIMPS with Mayhem merkins sprinkled in.

    Mosey to House of pain for stations with pull ups.

    Burpee penalties for the young pax not knowing Cheap Trick.

    Back to the flag

    COT

    Honored to lead this awesome group of men!

    SYITG

  • Lo and behold-6 full-grown knaves, wll past the age of wisdom, were seen galloping through the ancient streets of Olde Mandeville – from Waterpik

    Hear ye, hear ye! A most noble and mildly ridiculous account of this morn’s Thursday gathering of the F3 fellowship:

    Upon the dawning of the day, ‘twas declared with great fervour that the F must needs be restored unto our Thursday toil — for lo, ‘tis not merely a letter, but a spirit, a flame, a fire! Sir Jose10k, in an act of alchemical wit, didst attempt to divine the sacred algorithm by which Sir Cowbell arrives exactly two minutes tardy to each summons. Two minutes? Verily, the crowd did wonder what other feats he performeth in such swift time…

    The gallant gazelles did leap forth along their usual path, their strides light and graceful. Meanwhile, the Clydesdales, noble of heart and heavy of hoof, did follow apace, conversing of many a deep matter: the fickle nature of diet, the perils of teenagers, the enchantments of prom, and the heartbreaks of love long lost.

    And lo! Upon the return to the realm of swings and monkey bars, there stood the mighty Waterpik, who smited the brethren with feats of strength and calisthenics most cruel. None could match his vigour, though many did try, and all did suffer with great camaraderie.

    Thus concludes the tale of six buffoons, bringing both glory and distress to the cobblestones of Olde Mandeville. They ended the morn, sweaty and sore, yet richer in tales and tighter of hamstring. Long live the fellowship of F3!

    Fin.

    Now, let me explain this. I am in the middle of administering the English portion of the state test. Upon finishing the test, all of my students are talking in English accents. I had to inquire why, and apparently one of the questions involved the Renaissance Perfect, now I get to do the thing that I absolutely love to do. I get to tap into my students’ creativity and give them a shared google document. The topic: early morning run with exercises at the playground at the end. The theme: old English. And bam, this is what they come up with. I did add a little flare to it: sorry Cowbell. I hope y’all enjoyed it.

  • Gorilla complex – from Fletch

    Having signed up last minute this morning I decided to rinse and repeat one of Shooters workouts.
    Warmup: 10IC Arm circles, forward and back, Cherry Pickers, Imperial Walkers, Toe Touches, Windmills and SSH.
    Thang: Pax moseyed to the rock pile and picked up coupons and continued on to the side of the courthouse. Gorilla complex is 8 rep’s of curls, kettle swings, presses and merkins. Mosey down the greenway and do 8 monkey humpers. R and R for 8 sets. Completing this we returned the coupons and did 20IC SSH’s. Moseyed back to the Gipper and did a round robin of Mary till time was up. Mobydick prayed us out. Always grateful to be a part of this group.

  • Running in the Muggies – from Rudy

    Summer is here. And with it, the muggies. So 8 PAX ran and walked and sweated.

    COT: Saban saving the day. Seriously. Great work Saban, and thank you for being willing to step up for a stranger when she needed that help. Great example for all of us to strive for.

  • Stations of the Cross – from Rudy

    My typical Good Friday workout – stop me if you’ve heard this one before. The muggies are back. As are the pricklies. Which would add to the pains of the PAX. 8 PAX joined, including Chips! Great to have you back in the gloom, good friend!

    A quick warmup, then we’ll visit 14 stations. Each station is 3 minutes total: 90 second exercise, then a lunge walk about 30 yards (taking 60-75 seconds), then a rest until the next station.

    After the 4th station, we mixed in the KoT Sled – one PAX would pull that while lunge walking, rotating it amongst the PAX.

    Station 1: Jesus sentenced to death: Peter Parker Peters (and our first taste of the pricklies)
    Station 2: Jesus takes up his cross: Merkins
    Station 3: Jesus falls the first time: Burpees (falling but get back up)
    Station 4: Jesus meets his mother: Big Boy Situps (some Mary)
    Station 5: Simon Takes up the cross with Jesus: Low Slow Squats (this isn’t a race). And its a break from the pricklies
    Station 6: Veronica wipes His face: V-Ups
    Station 7: Jesus falls the 2nd time: Burpees
    Station 8: Jesus meets the women of Jerusalem: Hello Dolly
    Station 9: Jesus falls the 3rd time: Burpees
    Station 10: Jesus Stripped of his cloths: Jump Squats
    Station 11: Jesus is Nailed to the Cross: T-Merkins
    Station 12: Jesus dies on the Cross: Genuflects
    Station 13: Jesus taken down from the cross: Carolina Dry Docks
    Station 14: Jesus laid in the tomb: Elbow Plank

    Back to the flag for COT and prayers, especially thanksgiving for continued recovery of Chips.

  • The “10” Commandments – from The Hammer

    Four brave souls hit the basketball court Monday morning, led by YHC. First to join Waterpik and myself was a freshly bronzed Jose—straight from Grenada and glowing like a golden churro. Then came Coachella, who clearly forgot this was a workout and not a music festival.

    The day’s theme? The number 10. Because why not suffer symmetrically?

    We kicked off with a “Merkins & Bear Crawls” relay that basically turned the court into a sweaty hamster wheel —10 merkins, bear crawl, 10 merkins, bear crawl again, repeat over and over. We were trying to add enough sweat to erase the Marsh madness tallies that haunt some of us.

    Then came the ladder to 10, aka cardio purgatory. We hit all four corners with 10 merkins and at each stop continued to add 10 reps of another exercise. I can’t remember all of them—because who can remember anything mid-suffering?

    Highlight of the day? Coachella tried to kiss the ground with his whole face. Zero style points, but 10 out of 10 for comedic value.

    We closed with Mary… that lasted a minute and a half. Jose was still on island time, and frankly, we were all too tired to argue.

    Great workout. Even better faceplant.

  • Wall to Wall Disappointment – from Steve

    Man, this was the kinda crowd where you gotta have your coffee before you show up to Q. That or a shot of Jaegermeister.

    Not only did YHC have Bush texting the night before, making sure it would be an “impactful” beatdown before he committed to posting, but I had the Wacker progeny after me as well, with Duke apparently complaining that morning that, “Oh Mr. Steve’s workouts are never that hard.”

    Et tu, Duke?

    YHC had the last laugh, though, conjuring images of Mandeville’s long-dormant Machete Man just before Duke attempted to relieve his bladder in Granny’s bamboo forest. The little man noped right outta there!

    Now I can’t say that this beatdown was impactful, but hey, we did try a few new things. Started each round with a different wall exercise at the far end of the corridor, followed by another exercise x15 at each of three points around the trailhead, before circling back for some calf raises. Rinse and repeat.

    The wall (and subsequent) exercises were:
    BTTW crawl —> 15 jump squats (x3)
    Donkey Kicks x15 —> 15 merkins (x3)
    Hip Slappers x 15 IC —> 15x big boys (x3)
    People’s Chair w/ Air Presses x 100 —> 15x SMK’s IC (x3)
    Dirty hookup x15 (2:1) —> 15x T-merkins (x3)

    Everyone was bummed that we had to save the Chicken Peckers for a later date, but hey, we did get to hear many tales along the way.

    We learned that Jose on vacation in Grenada is the same Jose that we get every week: he nearly memorialized his 10k status on TripAdvisor, threatening the airline that he’d run from the hotel to the airport if they didn’t provide a taxi to get his lost luggage. Considering Jose’s recent mastery of the backblast, I think we can all agree that the world has been deprived of a very unique TripAdvisor review.

    What else… Three of the pax (Russo, Bush, Cowbell) had successfully run the Crescent City Classic over the weekend. Cowbell reminisced about the time the amphitheater bats chased him down the block. Duke counted cadence with the salty authority of the gunnery sergeant from Full Metal Jacket. (Duke also showed us the opposite of “intensify to modify,” with his Dead Superman modification of the t-merkins reminding me of the old days and the infamous “Nacho plank.”) Bushwacker lit fire to his reputation as a tight wad and made it rain this weekend, buying trips and vehicles that would’ve given the Bush of old an aneurism. And last, but certainly not least, we learned that you don’t cut in front of bear-killer Coachella at the lunch line at Piccadilly, even if you are a child. Bad things happen and this man has no problem stepping over your dead body for another scoop of carrot soufflé.

    COT, announcements of the Zoorich Classic this Saturday, Legal’s party on May 10th, and Coachella’s birthday party coming up in June. Stay tuned for details on the latter, which promises to be a Breakfast Club-type collision of stereotypes. And finally, Russo prayed us out.

    T-claps to Coach, who is making a concerted effort to post to multiple weekday beatdowns from here on out. (Be on the lookout for him at Thursday’s Scramble, minus the plate armor.)

    And thank you gentlemen for posting this morning and pushing me to get a little better. Appreciate you.

    Except for Bushwacker, who summarized my effort to make this an impactful beatdown as…

    “Eh.”

  • Hey F3! Stop Chucking My Dang Rocks! – from Hawgcycle

    Conditions: Clear and 71 degrees. Humidity 93%. Wind 6 mph from SSE

    Warm-Up: SSH x 31; IW x 15; Peter Parker x 15; Grass Grabbers x 15; Shoulder Taps x 14; Lunges x 15; LBC x 20; Low Slow Squats x 15

    The Thang:

    Rock Climb – Rockees x 5; Shoulder Press x 10; Squats x 15; Curls x 20; Rows x 25; Chest Press x 30; Big Boi x 35; Chest Press x 30; Rows x 25; Curls x 20; Squats x 15; Shoulder Press x 10; Rockees x 5

    Mosey to the Fence for Fence Chuckers. We chucked for 10 minutes or so. We quit chucking when Fracsac hit the path.

    We moseyed around the south end of the field toward the gym. Stopped at Mr. Rogers Brogahood for dips as we waited for the six.

    At the gym we did BTTW, 15 Curls from People’s Chair, BTTW.

    Return the Rocks and Run back to the flag