When Enron asked YHC to switch with him and Q this morning, I asked myself the question, “Is it time for another Burpeepalooza?” and I answered myself the answer, “Why, yes. Yes it is.” Preparation required one hype GIF for the GroupMe and an hour or so of research for songs with repetitive lyrics and good burpee timing. Burpeepalooza 2023 was ready for launch, and YHC was so fired up, I woke before my alarm.
Oh, and in case I should fail to mention it, new ground was broken last night as YHC reached across a deep, long-standing rift for the sake of a quality beatdown:
Oontz had been showing some serious inconsistency with volume as of late, and since it would be of absolute necessity for all PAX to hear the trigger words for this beatdown regardless of loud traffic on the highway, there was no doubt about it–it was time to bring in the big guns. YHC knew down deep that BAPS (Big Ass Party Speaker, for the newer guys) was the only one who could handle this kind of weight, so late in the evening, YHC dialed up Yankee Joe. After some initial disbelief and suspicion of being punked (like that one time with JBL), YHC proved himself sincere, and YJ heartily agreed to let BAPS shine. We both shed some healthy tears afterward and slept a little more soundly.
The warmup this morning had to be seriously substantial. After Lil’ Cuz’s Saturday butt-whoopin’, the soreness was deep and every single muscle was tight. So, given the range of motion burpees require, flexibility would be of the utmost to save the PAX’s joints for the rest of this week’s beatdowns.
Warm-o-rama: seal jacks, windmills, imperial walkers (so sore), grass grabbers (the “three taps backward with the clap” variety), arm circles, cherry pickers, YJ-led wrist rotations (the non-yoga-demon variety), self-love, tempo merkins (3-count down and 3-count up), mountain climbers, high knees, and butt kicks. Had to cover all the bases, especially for us old guys!
YHC then introduced the concept of the Burpeepalooza–Enron and Paradox (and the absent Fence Post) were the only ones who had done it before. It’s an entire beatdown of non-stop songs, each having a trigger word or phrase upon which a burpee is executed. Rest between (ha!).
Here’s the list, played on shuffle so God decides if two or three (or four) hard songs get played in a row:
“Ain’t No Sunshine” by Bill Withers–burpees on “gone” and “away”
“For God is With Us” by For King and Country–burpee on “God is with us”
“Coconut” by Harry Nilsson–“coconut”
“Happy” by Pharrell Williams–“Happy” (continuous burpees when they say it really fast)
“In Your Eyes” by Peter Gabriel–“your eyes” (backup singers count…they’re real people, too)
“That’s the Way (I Like It)” by KC & the Sunshine Band–“I like it” (Dang.)
“Come and Get Your Love” by Redbone–“come and get your love”
“Have a Little Faith in Me” by John Hiatt–“have a little faith”
“Got My Mind Set On You” by George Harrison–“set on you” (Ran out of time for this one, probably because of the ridiculously long warmup)
This crew was impressive–the mumblechatter continued to be witty and there were no visible signs of discouragement. Muscles were zapped, oxygen was in low supply in the mugginess, and there were some unfulfilled promises of merlot splashing (puking), but spirits remained high as the burpee count continued to quietly climb.
All said and done, if all triggers resulted in burpees, the count was 245, a record for Thibodaux Burpeepaloozas! And even if some were skipped, most if not all of the PAX did over 200 burpees in 45 minutes! This would have sounded like an impossible feat if this number was shared at 5:29am, but because we were suffering together, distracted by listening for the triggers, and not counting to see how many we had done and how many more we felt like we could rationally do, our bodies outshone even our highest expectations. T-claps especially to the guys who had never done this before and were blindsided this morning!
COT followed, and we discussed the mistake of trying to measure how much you have left in the tank, both during exercise and throughout our day with family, etc. We can always do more if we live for the person/people around us rather than constantly trying to measure “how much more of this I can take.”
Q assignments for the rest of the week were finalized, prayer intentions were shared, and YJ prayed us out. It was an honor to get through that with you fellas this morning!
SYITG (See You in the Gloom),
Goose
