Blog

  • Great Scott!!! – from Jose10k

    10/26/1955
    Marty’s journey through time begins on October 26, 1985, when he accidentally travels back to 1955 during a mishap with the DeLorean. His adventures in the past, including meeting his teenage parents, inadvertently shape his future. Marty must ensure that his parents meet and fall in love, or risk altering the course of his own existence. His race against time makes for a thrilling and humorous story that has become a hallmark of the movie.
    Which is why I am curious, how has JV not seen this classic? Netflix homework brother.

    Warm-Up: Preparing for Time Travel (5 minutes) Power of Love by Huey Lewis and News

    Jog to Noah’s Arc: Modified Dora (Great Scott)

    Phase 1: Time for 88mph, we will 88 burpees, partner 1 runs the arc while partner 2 does burpees

    Phase 2: “1.21 Gigawatts “ What the hell is Gigawatt? Dora again, partner 1 runs a loop, while partner 2 does merkins- Team total is 121.
    1.21 Gigawatts again, this time with a twist, each person has to do 121 squats individually while their partner runs a loop. Two loops were needed.

    Phase 3: 1955 – “Skateboard Escape”
    This phase is inspired by Marty’s quick thinking and agility as he escapes Biff’s gang.

    1. Bear Crawls – ½ way up, jog the rest of the way
    Imagine you’re dodging around obstacles.
    2. Side lunges 10 on each side, at the top of the arc, rinse and repeat
    3. Walking Lunges – up the arc and back to strengthen your legs to escape Biff

    Phase 4: Enchantment Under the Sea dance-
    Johnny B Goode- SSH to the whole song of Johnny Be Good

    Phase 3: Back in Time. Time to get Marty back to the future with Reverse lunges all the way around Noah’s Arc. Back in Time by Huey Lewis and Earth Angel as well. With a minute left it was a quick run back to the flag. COT with intentions for my family with the passing of my Aunt Patty. Thanks for letting me lead, thanks for reading the back blast. SYITG

  • You Can’t Ignore The H8! – from Hawgcycle

    You cannot ignore the H8! We tried. There was no H8! in April. Honestly, I forgot all about it. I guess I tried to push the H8! way down deep, but it never went away. The last few months have shown me that the H8! is always there. I can’t ignore it. I have to deal with it.

    The Thang:

    Each lap consists of running south to the top of the levee, crossing canal (bear crawling the neutral ground), running south to the bottom of the levee, cross canal and run north to the top of the levee, cross canal (bear crawling the neutral ground), running north down the levee and back across canal to the starting point. At the starting point, you do a descending burp and merk pyramid starting at 8 (burpee with 8 merkins, burpee with 7 merkins…burpee with 1 merkin)

    At the end of the 2nd lap the burp and merk pyramid starts at 7, etc.
    The goal is to complete 8 laps in 40 minutes. According to MapMyRun, each loop is approximately 0.4 miles. Therefore, to conquer the H8! you will have to do the following in 40 minutes:

    • Run over 3 Miles of Hills
    • 550 Yards of Bear Crawls
    • 36 Burpees
    • 120 Merkins

    We did AMRAP in 40 minutes.

    NMM

    • This was a full compliance hate – Strict 40 minute time limit, running on the sidewalk, no corner cutting, and bear crawling the entire length of the neutral ground.
    • We had 12 guys attempt the H8! Today. That’s a good turnout. T-claps to The Architect, High Rise, Mahatma, Mayhem, Pinewood, Mr. Rodgers, Rudy, Smooth, SOGO, Thighs, and Triple Shift for choosing to do hard things.
    • Was Mr. Rodgers brazen enough to attempt the H8! in a weighted vest?
    • A special shout out to High Rise and Mayhem for resisting the pull of the LVCC and their Temple of the Ole Man River. Members of the temple are devoted to a Chatbot they call Coach Greg. I was hoping a few more members would be willing to choose to battle the H8! Especially without their High Priestess Kuch and his Eunuch Glitter Balls in attendance. Unfortunately, the devotion of the following was too strong for them to waiver from the Supreme Chatbot’s commands. Bongo, El Guapo, Jesus Juice, Mama’s Pride, Saban, Sandberg, and Thumbwar sacrificed their manhood in sacred devotion to Coach Gregg this morning with a 45-minute easy run ritual.
    • Three completed all 8 laps today: Smooth, YHC, and The Architect.
    • Smooth went back out for lap 9 and was about 5 seconds short of finishing the running portion of the lap.
    • If you have ever helped with a Youth Run Nola event, you will know that the kids take off in a sprint when the gun goes off. They do not know the difference between a 100-meter dash and a 3-mile run. I’m guessing Pinewood is a YRN alum.
    • There were a few guys that finished the eight laps in just over 40 minutes. They are prime to get all eight in April.
    • Speaking of April, we now have 6 months to prepare. Let’s keep pushing each other to stay disciplined and continue accelerating.

  • Hello Boys, I’m BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! – from Jose10k

    Grundy reached out to Q another Spartan beatdown, naturally, because who else would? But after my last dance with sandbags and buckets, the splash pad can keep that level of punishment. Today, we’re enjoying the beautiful weather at the A1C, and instead of finding new ways to wreck my body, I went with a classic choice—The 4 Corners of Doom. Extended warm-up to wake up every sore muscle I’ve got, then it’s game on:

    • 7 Merkins at each corner (and yes, you backpedal to the next…for style),
    • 14 Copperhead Squats (just low enough to make you hate them),
    • 21 Freak Nasties
    • And a grand finale of 28 Wife Pleasers (you can imagine the conversations about that one).

    When you think it’s over, enter the round robin Tabata. Just enough to remember why we love…or mostly survive…these sessions. COT. Happy Birthday to Bushwacker. Y’all have fun at the convergence tomorrow. I’ve got the Q at the lakefront. Thanks for posting, thanks for reading, thanks for pushing me to be better. Jose10K out!

  • BurpJack Horseman – from America’s Best

    YHC had a Jones. A Basketball Jones.
    But today, I would not need someone to set a pick for me at the free-throw line of life, nor someone I can pass to. No, I would not even need someone to hit the open man on the give-and-go (and not end up in the popcorn machine).
    Because today we would not really play basketball…
    Bur first… let’s go look at the new giant flagpole. And then race back. First 3 back get the first three guesses at song lyrics. Goose, Pope and Honeysuckle won Gold, Silver, and Bronze, and thus would get to try and identify a song by the lyrics. If Goose identified it on the first stanza, we would just take a lap around the CC, if Pope guessed after hearing the 2nd stanza, we would hold Al Gore and Jump Squat on each song title; if Honeysuckle got it after hearing the final stanza, we would hold plank and merkin each song title. However, since nobody identified it, we ran in place and did a Burpee every time we heard “Mmm-Bop.” And sometimes when we heard “doo-wop” or “shebop” or whatever.

    Then on past the playground to the highest court in the land. . .
    It occurred to YHC that as many times as the PAX graced the Den’s basketball arena, we had yet to play HORSE. It didn’t occur to YHC until mid-beatdown that we likely only had the time (and skill) to play PIG.
    And the rules would be: SSH while waiting for your shot. Add one burpee on a miss (upon review of my original rules, this was to be 5 merkins). After Pope filled-up (is that the opposite of “drained”?) several 3’s, it was augmented to 3-burpees if you missed a 3-pointer. Then sprint to opposite baseline and back after your shot.
    Once you were out, you stood on the sideline and did a burpee with each shot taken by anyone.
    And the action ensued! … evoking zero inspiration and even less respect.
    But we finished our pig.
    And like a porcine character from our childhood, it was some PIG.
    “Some” being vague enough that you can take it to mean “glorious” if you are optimistic, or “interesting” if you are realistic. At least It was dark.
    There were just about 10 minutes left, so YHC called an audio-daily-double audible. The only music trivia that was in my brain at the time is something I heard long ago… that a certain song was originally “You died in Vietnam” (the actual story is much longer and convoluted… see me later for a dissertation).
    Same format as the first thang, but instead of a sprint, first 3 of the PAX to hit a free-throw would guess. Getting 3/8 to hit a free-throw should be easy…
    Several minutes later we had our men. Honeysuckle, Paradox, and Popeye. None guessed correctly (although Dox’s guess of Fortunate Son wins the best educated guess), so we ran back to the flag, stopping for burpees for every “Born in the USA.”
    Back in just enough time for 1 minute of Mary, the honors were given to Goose with the disclaimer “NO DR W’s.” One minute of wife pleasers seemed just about right.
    COT
    Animal went to Pope for his prized PIG performance. 10-Year Convergence this Saturday in NOLA.
    Lil Cuz prayed us out.

  • Multiplication of the Runners – from Charmin

    The Mustard packet and YHC started off at 5:30 with just the two of us.

    By the end, we had picked up a group of three, Pai Gow and Two Yutes.

    Overall a great morning for a workout around Pontiff.

  • Merkin mile reboot? And the Burpee and the Hammer! – from Smooth Operator

    YHC pulled up at 5:12 due to forgetting to put the two tires and maul in the truck the night before. YHC didn’t see any movement from the Doxs household this morning so i figured I’d park in the coveted Doxs parking spot. Little did I know I would be stealing his Thang from the beatdown before.

    Warmarama started immediately
    SSH
    Windmills
    Arm circles
    Cherry pickers
    Imperial walkers
    And a bumper mosey to get the juices flowing.

    And Yes Tana there is now a road where the bumper used to be.

    Thang 1

    Thang 1 merkin mile
    When YHC started, Tuesday Tuff was fairly new but it seemed to always start with a merkin mile around rich man’s loop.So that’s what I proposed to do this morning even with Gooses look of displeasure. Apparently a merkin mile was completed on Monday, and to be fair YHC had ever my intention of showing up said Monday but a call out fart sack was in my forecast for the day. Therefore YHC had a decision to make, do we deviate from the plan or do we get tuff on this Tuesday. Which is exactly what we did. YHC has a strange liking for the merkin mile even though it always ends with the entire PAX picking up the six (me). It reminds me that no matter how out of shape YHC gets, the PAX is there to welcome me back into the fold. The merkin mile consist of running a mile around rich man’s loop stopping every quarter mile to do 25 merkins ending back at the stage. Somehow this was AB’s first merkin mile and sounded like it wouldn’t be the last.

    After YHC recovered enough to make words we jumped right into Thang 2

    Thang 2 The burpee and the hammer

    When YHC started coming to beatdowns there seemed to be a big deal about burpees. The pax loved to give them out but hated to do them. Also YHC loves to hit thing with a hammer the bigger the hammer the better. Therefor we will be pounding a pair of tires with a 10 lb maul and we will work on all things burpee. The tire pounding timer will be ten swings at one tire, Bearcrawl with hammer to next tire and 10 more swings at that tire. Then bear crawl back. While this is taking place. The other pax’s will be at other stations

    Station 1 standard perfect burpee to work on form
    Station 2 manmakers or blockees for AB
    Station 3 goblet squats
    Station 4 4 thrusters
    Station 5 groiners shout out to YJ
    Station 6 hand release merkins
    Station 7 jump squats
    (This is not the actual order of stations, but YHC winged the order for no particular reason other than to make it more confusing on myself.)
    After one round of this with not much communication from the PAX and YHC checking the time on his phone way more than necessary we did a Lightning round of 3 swings Kareoke 3 swings kareoke back.
    After this we moved into 4 minutes of Mary.

    4 minutes of Mary
    WW1 sit-ups with terrible cadence presented by yours truly
    Dr. W’s by goose
    Freddy Merkins by AB
    V ups by Tana finishing perfectly on 0600.

    After this we had COT and talked about the upcoming convergence in NOLA and Safety Valve prayed us out. Thanks for embracing the suck with me.
    SYIYG
    Smooth Operator

  • Put The Bunny Back in the Box – from Steve

    You can probably measure the difficulty of the Spartan Beast by how many days it takes Jose to recuperate and return to the weekday beatdowns. Now, if he’s not back by Friday’s A1C beatdown, it might be time to worry. There were pictures of a shirtless Tank cozying up to Parrot circulating on Instagram and Snapchat this weekend, suggesting the ride home may well have gone sideways.

    Anywho… back at Granny’s, things were on the straight and narrow, as they say. Just Russo and I, doing the usual, which today was a simple circuit (designed to be able to chat and hear about the Beast, but alas, no Sprtaners were present to tell their tales of glory and valor):

    Start at x15 reps, then increase by 5 after each round:
    Benches – Freak Nasties
    Stage – Donkey Kicks
    West Corridor – Merkins
    Depot – Bulgarians
    Stairs – Calf Raises (*always x3 each step)
    Top of the Stairs – SMKs

    Throughout the beatdown, Russo was kind enough to indulge me in a Nicolas Cage retrospective, where we recounted the many wonders of his career – from Raising Arizona to Moonstruck, from The Rock and Face / Off to National Treasure and, of course, his Oscar-snubbed performance in Con-Air. Russo and I did our best “Cage Rage” impressions for the runners passing by, before moving on to a travesty equal to the Con Air snub: Russo’s loss in his company’s annual chili cook-off. I heard all about the machinations behind the scenes – illegal alliances and clever, quippy names that edged him out of victory with what I can only assume was a damn fine chili. But don’t count him out just yet, he’s got something special cooked up for next year’s contest.

    Ended with some Mary and COT, where Russo prayed us out. Thanks brother for the consistency, appreciate you!

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SNLOt–5zcg

  • 10 Years and 1 Day Later – from Reluctant Yankee

    Re-enactment of the first ever official F3 Nola workout

    The Thang:

    Gandalf’s Q (played by Hawgcycle)

    Mosey to a space near the football field, backwards run, side-shuffle left, side-shuffle right
    Circle of Pain (COP):
    Side-Straddle Hops in cadence x15
    Merkins in cadence x12
    Imperial Walkers in cadence x15
    Mountain Climbers in cadence x20
    Slow Squats in cadence x10
    Wide-Arm Merkins in cadence x10
    Diamond Merkins in cadence x10
    Mosey to bridge
    11s across the bridge with burpees on far side and jump squats on near side #crowdpleaser
    Plank-O-Rama: Regular, Elbows, Left Hand/Leg High, Right Hand/Leg High, Mission Impossible (10 count from Fracsac)

    Reluctant Yankee’s Q (Played by Triple Shift)

    Mosey back to track
    6 Minutes of Mary:
    LBCs in cadence x10
    Hello Dollys in cadence x10
    High Dollys (Rosalitas) in cadence x10
    Bicycles (Freddy Mercury) in cadence x10
    Dying Cockroach in cadence x10
    Flutter Kicks in cadence
    Quick mosey one full lap around the track

    Chong Li’s Q (Played by Reluctant Yankee)

    Loooooong mosey to picnic tables under the bridge
    Chong Li Special:
    Decline Merkins in cadence x16
    Right Leg Squat in cadence x8
    Incline Merkins in cadence x16
    Left Leg Squat in cadence x8
    Decline Merkins IC x12
    Right Leg Squat IC x6
    Incline Merkins IC x12
    Left Leg Squat IC x6
    Decline Merkins IC x8
    Right Leg Squat IC x4
    Incline Merkins IC x8
    Left Leg Squat IC x4
    Decline Merkins IC x4
    Right Leg Squat IC x2
    Incline Merkins IC x4
    Left Leg Squat IC x2
    Mosey back to the track
    Two Rounds With Tyson happened in original beatdown, but ran out of time. Yankee gave Fracsac the Q for last minute, so it was 10 burpees for the 10 years of F3 Nola!
    Mosey back to shovel flag
    Circle of Trust (COT)

    NMM

    This beatdown was held 10 years and 1 day after the original launch. T-Claps to all who kept this great thing going!

    Not sure how they squeezed in 2 rounds of Tysons on that first day. The OGs were 10 years and 1 day older, so…..

    4 OGs were present- Hawgcycle, Reluctant Yankee, Triple Shift, and Redfish

  • A Taste of H8! – from Space Cowboy

    Weather: Clear, no wind, 55 degrees

    Another beautiful morning at Kennarie Ridge! Gave disclaimer and headed to JPAX.

    Warmups
    Samson Stretch 5 sec hold x 5
    Slow Low Squats x10
    Abe Slogodas x10
    Forward Arm Circles x10
    Backwards Arm Circles x10
    Seal Claps x10
    SSH x15
    Hillbillies x10

    The Thang
    In preparation for the H8 at Okwata this Thur, I thought this beatdown would help us work on those bear crawls. Kenna Brah and Charmin did their own exercise routine since they were nursing injuries.

    Start at front of JPAX
    Run to JPAX loading dock ramp, Bear Crawl up, Lunges down
    Run back to front of JPAX
    Burpees x10
    Repeat run to loading dock ramp, Bear Crawl, Lunges, and back to front of JPAX
    Burpees x10
    Merkins x20
    Repeat run to loading dock ramp, Bear Crawl, Lunges, and back to front of JPAX
    Burpees x10
    Merkins x20
    Step Ups x30
    Repeat run to loading dock ramp, Bear Crawl, Lunges, and back to front of JPAX
    Burpees x10
    Merkins x20
    Step Ups x30
    SSH x40

    7’s: BBSU, run up stairs, Step-ups, run down ramp

    Head to flag. COT

  • This is (not) Sparta! – from Russo

    With many folks off to Dallas to watch a Michigan State game, a small krewe of 3 braved the chilly mid 50s early morning temps. I thought I would be flying solo, because at 6:30 only I was in shouting distance of the flag, but alas Pika and Legal found me after their pre-thang for some:

    4 corners (at each corner of a block, perform reps accordingly…10 at block1, 20 block 2, R&R)

    Round 1:
    10 Burpees
    20 Squats
    30 shoulder taps
    40 crunches

    Round 2
    10 wide merkins
    20 monkey humpers
    30 SMCs
    40 Flutter kicks (2 is 1)

    Round 3
    10 Jump squats
    20 Merkins
    30 plank jacks
    40 hello Dollie’s

    Pik peeled off at some point, so Legal and I moved to the gazebo for 11s:

    Freak Nastys
    Carioca in between to the sidewalk
    M’ktar Jhai’s

    We moseyed back to the flag for a little Mary: penguins, gas pumps, Rosalitas, Leg raises.

    A good time was had by all as we had a quick COT and prayer, lifting up our Spartan brethren primarily.

    SYITG