Author: Rudy

  • Never have I ever (Yes I have!) – from Russo

    Disclaimer: yes, most of this was written well ahead of time, Zoolander, and copied and pasted, edited, and spellchecked (I think).

    30 degrees greeted a Pax of 13 this morning, perfect sunrise, a little chilly from the remnants of rain.

    Too cold to be called a Warmup (all IC, between 10 and 25x)
    – Sealjacks
    – Good mornings
    – High knees
    – Cherry pickers
    – Grass grabbers
    – Self love
    – Imperial walkers

    Thangs before the Thang
    (1) Mosey down Girod, stopping every block or so for some Ro-Cham-Burpee (10 rounds of rock, paper, scissors, the winner performs merkins, the loser burpees)

    Things we learned:
    – Zoolander and Jose were “pretty even” through 2 rounds
    – Guinea Pig had incredible fortune until he ran into the buzzsaw of YHC’s scissors
    – The ground is cold without gloves

    (2) Card sharks (Complete exercises based on card count, next round guess higher or lower, a correct guess multiplies the rep 2x, incorrect 3x)
    – Crab cakes
    – Scissor kicks
    – Peter Parker’s
    – Big boi situps
    – Plank jacks
    – American hammers
    – Murder bunnies
    – Monkey humpers

    Things we learned:
    – Murder bunnies are a favorite of YHC
    – The deck was most certainly not stacked to finish on an Ace (with a 3x multiplier)
    – Guinea Pig played great strategy on the 10
    – Jose redeemed himself with higher/lower

    Thang

    YHC is not what one would call creative. Completely left-brained, my world revolves around number and order and sequence. I struggle to keep beatdowns fresh. Most of my planning is either “that’s a good idea, let’s modify that” or “what’s a game I’ve played that can be transformed into a beatdown?” The latter held true for a spirited and, at times, confusing, game of:

    Never have I ever (Q calls out an action, If you’ve done said action, move to one side. If not, move to the other. Exercise and rep count will vary based on what side you’re on)

    Actions (“Yes” first exercise listed, “No”second one listed, most of them look right, there was some modification)

    (1) Q’ed the Mothership – 10 merkins, 5 burpees

    (2) Fartsacked a Q – 10 burpees, 10 merkins

    (3) Intentionally run a red light – 10 burpees, 15 squats

    (4) Picked up the 6 – 3 calf raises, 15 SMCs

    (5) Fallen asleep at work – 25 hallelujah squats, 5 Peter Parker’s

    (6) Called a partner the wrong name – 10 donkey kicks, 5 arm circles

    (7) Cut my own or someone else’s hair – 10 merkins, 20 SSH

    (8) Dated a friend’s ex – lap around Granny’s, 5 merkins

    (9) Stopped to help some with roadside car trouble – 5 jump squats, 25 Apollo Ohnos

    (10) Let someone cut in line in front of me – 10 mountain climbers, 10 burpees

    (11) Played wordle – bear crawl, mosey

    (12) Slept in my car – 20 star jumps, 10 arm circles

    (13) Hit a parked car – 20 groiners, 5 merkins

    (14) Sent an inappropriate text or message to the wrong person – 5 burpees, 5 merkins

    (15) Been frisked or in a police car – 30 squats, 10 cherry pickers

    (16) Removed an inappropriate amount of clothes in public – 10 burpees, 1 burpee

    Things we learned:
    – Too many lawyers in the Pax. We had to define “partner”, “hit”, “date”, “mothership”, “intentional”, as well as clarify what is meant by “inappropriate” and “slept”
    – Even after 16 rounds, some of us aren’t really sure which side to go to
    – There were at least two people who found themselves on the side I didn’t expect them to be on (Names redacted, let the speculation commence)
    – Other things that should not be broadcast here to protect the innocent
    – Best line of the Thang (paraphrased): I paid for that 20 years ago and now Russo is making me pay for it again.

    After enough absolution, Pax moseyed back to the flag in a modified Indian run where the lead runner peels off and heads to the back.

    COT, Name-o-Rama, announcements, and prayer closed us out.

    Announcements
    – HogsBreath and Pass Interference are planting the Slidell flag on Monday at 5:30!
    – Hammer is pulling together a fundraiser for the Nehemiah Project in mid-March. I’ll let him provide more details on this worthy cause.
    – There were multiple prayer requests, including friends and family of Akbar, Bubba, Bird, and Jose, so a focus of our prayer was on mental/physical health and God’s gifts of healing, comfort, mercy, and peace.

    One final word on something Bubba brought up:

    There is an awful lot we shoulder every day: work, family, commitments, temptation, life’s difficulties, you name it. We may tend to bottle up stress or pressure until we just can’t take it anymore.

    Most of us have found F3 to be a release of some of that pressure. We’ve stumbled upon a group that, despite our imperfections, will absolutely stand tall in the face of adversity and stand with our brothers. I thank God every day for this group, and each of the men that have helped to shape me into a better human being. You are all leading by example and my prayer is that we do that for everyone around us.

    Maybe you pick up the 6 more, or reach out to ask how something went for someone this week. Maybe you share your Q source, and then make sure it gets read. Maybe you spend a couple hours to drop everything and help someone move. There are countless other examples that I hope we have and can point to when things get tough. There are too many other examples for me to list.

    If anyone is struggling, reach out. My ear is always ready to be bent. SYITG 🤛🏼

  • ALARM with Coups – from Paradox

    YHC decided to give the props a break and go back old school with an ALARM coupon workout picked fresh from the Lexicon. 3 Pax assembled at the stage in a still but chilly bayou gloom.

    WarmoRama: Usuals SSH, IW, Windmills (requested by master sensei Goose), arm circles, self love, high knees, butt kickers

    Thang 1: mosey to bumper for short warm up then got started with alternating partner sprints and parker peter merkins, 10 rounds. Future planning note: the PPms were harder than expected and got a bit monotonous, will switch up to add variety next Q
    Thang 2: Back to the stage for ALARM w/ coupons. Starting together side by side with coupons we advanced with ALARM exercises decreasing from 25…20…15 etc
    Arms: OHP
    Legs: Squats
    Abs: dolphin hops on coupon
    Run: 1 lap around the “Track” , return to coupon
    Merkins: Coupon merkins

    Advance coupon ten steps with coupon rifle carry , reduce 5 reps and start again
    Finished up with Dealers choice Mary
    Nolan ryan, Big boy situps, LBCs

    This was my 3rd official, thanks for hanging in there fellas

    COT and Cardinal prayed us out

  • Krazy Ivan IV: Speedy Sings, Fracsac Frowns – from The Hammer

    It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair…for Fracsac apparently. The man who has a folder on his phone dedicated to the Freedom Hammer was crestfallen for a second year running. Bordering on tearful, Fracsac and his Southshore breathern had to witness a spritely Speedy Gonzales hoist the Freedom Hammer in triumph after the Northshore thumped the Southshore for the Crazy Ivan IV, 257 to 153. Precision results, thoroughly vetted and audited by the governing body, are as follows:

    1. Speedy Gonzales 31:22 (6:30 average pace)-recruited years ago by Jose 10k
    2. Amnesia 33:55
    3. In Time 34:07
    3. Cowbell 34:07
    5. The Hammer 34:34
    6. Saban 35:09
    7. Kuch 35:37
    8. Steve 36:45
    9. TankedUp! 37:20
    10. RevSox 37:36
    11. Sogo 37:47
    12. Hog’s Breath 40:25
    13. Thumb War 41:30
    14. Bongo (time between 41:30 and 42:43-you should have found me afterwards Bongo!)
    15. Snooze 42:43
    16. Pelican 42:44
    17. Shooter 43:34
    18. Flea 45:16
    19. BBQ 46.35
    20. Russo 46:55
    21. Jose 10k 47:38
    22. Pai Gow 49:55
    23. Baywatch (it was raining hard, lots was happening, Hog’s Breath was talking to me…sorry Baywatch I didn’t get your time)
    24. Belloq
    25. JV (not that JV, the other one) 55:19
    26. Kenner Brah
    27. McGiver

    And honorable mentions to PickAxe and Chainsaw, The Hammer’s 2.0s, who finished the first lap together in a blistering 13 minutes.

    Thanks for coming out guys. You all get a trophy for participating in this unequivocally, completely stupid and utterly pointless annual competition. YHC was thoroughly impressed with the total disregard for your personal wellbeing and safety and looks forward to a repeat performance same time next year. Over and out.

  • Back to School where I don’t get no respect – from Jose10k

    After a victorious Crazy Ivan, YHC was a bit sore and tired. I knew I had the Q, but had put it off to this morning. The highest form of flattery is imitation. So I stole Shooters back to school, but mine wasn’t the Billy Madison version. Mine was Rodney’s.
    Warm-up: All IC to 12, ssh, grass grabbers, self love, torso twists and shoulder rolls
    The thang: Perform 12 reps of each exercise for each grade. Move up a grade, perform the previous grade exercises, plus the new one. One loop around the parking garage, down to the bottom, then back up.
    1st grade: Merkins
    2nd-Leg Lifts
    3rd-Big Boy situps
    4th-Squats
    5th-Air pressess
    6th-lunges
    7th-12th, didn’t make it. We dropped out to pursue our careers. COT and Moby prayed us out.

    Thanks for letting me lead on this cold morning. Still no respect yet though.

  • Back to School where I don’t get no respect – from Jose10k

    After a victorious Crazy Ivan, YHC was a bit sore and tired. I knew I had the Q, but had put it off to this morning. The highest form of flattery is imitation. So I stole Shooters back to school, but mine wasn’t the Billy Madison version. Mine was Rodney’s.
    Warm-up: All IC to 12, ssh, grass grabbers, self love, torso twists and shoulder rolls
    The thang: Perform 12 reps of each exercise for each grade. Move up a grade, perform the previous grade exercises, plus the new one. One loop around the parking garage, down to the bottom, then back up.
    1st grade: Merkins
    2nd-Leg Lifts
    3rd-Big Boy situps
    4th-Squats
    5th-Air pressess
    6th-lunges
    7th-12th, didn’t make it. We dropped out to pursue our careers. COT and Moby prayed us out.

    Thanks for letting me lead on this cold morning. Still no respect yet though.

  • Back to School where I don’t get no respect – from Jose10k

    After a victorious Crazy Ivan, YHC was a bit sore and tired. I knew I had the Q, but had put it off to this morning. The highest form of flattery is imitation. So I stole Shooters back to school, but mine wasn’t the Billy Madison version. Mine was Rodney’s.
    Warm-up: All IC to 12, ssh, grass grabbers, self love, torso twists and shoulder rolls
    The thang: Perform 12 reps of each exercise for each grade. Move up a grade, perform the previous grade exercises, plus the new one. One loop around the parking garage, down to the bottom, then back up.
    1st grade: Merkins
    2nd-Leg Lifts
    3rd-Big Boy situps
    4th-Squats
    5th-Air pressess
    6th-lunges
    7th-12th, didn’t make it. We dropped out to pursue our careers. COT and Moby prayed us out.

    Thanks for letting me lead on this cold morning. Still no respect yet though.

  • Beat the Rain Brickathon – from Enron

    YHC rolled up to the stage at exactly 6:15 to see 4 PAX waiting patiently to get started. I then had to inform them that help was needed moving the bricks gathered from my back yard over to the front of “the stage”. Grateful this morning to make it out during a short break in the rain that has been moving through with much more to come today. Additionally thankful for one more warmer morning before the cold. For this beatdown, I took a couple of ideas from previous beatdowns and backblasts along with making sure I added something that left the workout to “chance”, one of Cardinals favorites.

    Warmup: the usual – SSH, WM, AC, Cherry Pickers, IW, Self Love

    Thang 1: Dice Run

    YHC was running late this morning and forgot the dice, Siri was helpful in providing a random number generator of 1-6

    Rules were explained as follows

    Each PAX had one “roll”, the number that came up dictated the run that would follow. 5 total laps

    1- Mosey one lap around the field
    2- Sprint one lap around the field
    3- Jog then karaoke one lap – alternating at each corner
    4- Mosey then sprint one lap – alternating at each corner
    5- Start slow mosey and increase speed around each corner
    6- Slow mosey with 5 merkins at each corner and 5 burpees at the end

    Thang 2: Brickathon
    PAX were instructed to grab their bricks and partner up, since there were 5 of us total we had one team of 3.

    Round 1:
    PAX 1: Hand release brick merkins
    PAX 2: Bear crawl with bricks down to the end of the field (about 35 yards) and mosey back
    Switch and repeat
    Round 2:
    PAX 1: Dying cockroaches with bricks
    PAX 2: Crab walk (no bricks) down and mosey back
    Switch and repeat

    Round 3:
    PAX 1: Shoulder Taps with Bricks
    PAX 2: Mosey down 20 squats at the other end and mosey back
    Switch and repeat

    Round 4:
    PAX 1: “butterfly” with Bricks (Bring arms from sides out to parallel with ground and back down) AMRAP
    PAX 2: Lunge walk out and mosey back
    Switch and repeat

    Round 5:
    PAX 1: Moroccan night clubs with bricks
    PAX 2: Walk crab down and mosey back
    Switch and repeat

    Round 6:
    PAX 1: Floyd Mayweather’s with bricks
    PAX 2: Mosey down – 20 big boy sit-ups at the other end and mosey back
    Switch and repeat

    Thang 4 – a song

    Joe Nicholls – Yeah
    In plank position for the entirety of the song, plank jack on “yeah” and mountain climber on “she”
    This song was longer than YHC originally thought, leading to more difficulty as well as ending the beatdown immediately after.

    COT and Goose prayed us out

  • Run Foundry Run – from Snooze

    Legs were heavy for those of us that opted to join Saban a day earlier on his sadistic 8.5+ mile jaunt through the city. Soreness be damned, though, because RCR is upon us. So let’s get some more miles in…

    Warm-up

    We moseyed to the track for a brief warm-up consisting of: Side Straddle Hop x 20, Windmills x 15, Grass Grabbers x 15, Imperial Walkers x 15, Arm circles x 10 (both ways), and 8 count Body Builders x 10.

    The Thang

    In order to avoid any PAX (YHC included) griping about puddles on the track, we moseyed over to the covered area in front of the Children’s Museum.

    25 Merkins – 1 lap down the LCH ramp, around the traffic circle, and back (approx. 1/4 mile)
    25 Merkins, 25 LBCs – 1 lap
    25 Merkins, 25 LBCs, 25 Carolina dry-docks – 1 lap
    25 Merkins, 25 LBCs, 25 Carolina dry-docks, 25 LBTs – 1 lap
    25 LBCs, 25 Carolina dry-docks, 25 LBTs – 2 laps
    25 Carolina dry-docks, 25 LBTs – 3 laps
    25 LBTs – 4 laps

    This was the plan, but we had to modify and cut it short due to time. After a mosey back to the flag and COT, we logged almost 3.5 miles.

    As always, thanks for the opportunity to lead.

  • No Asses in the Grasses – from Baywatch

    It was a nice, balmy morning at the lakefront as 10 PAX gathered for a beatdown. The pre-run Lakeview crew arrived with a minute to spare, including Breadsticks who was apparently worried that YHC had wet and grassy ideas. After disclosures were given, we moseyed around the fountain and over to the waterfront for a warmup as I assured the PAX grass wasn’t on the menu today.

    30 SSH IC
    25 Hillbillies IC
    15 Arm circles IC F/B
    15 overhead claps IC
    15 seal claps IC
    15 concrete grabbers IC (had to make sure grass was avoided)

    Next, we moseyed down to the bridge. All the Pax lined up facing the water at the top of the incline. While one PAX ran across the bridge and back, everyone else did decline merkins or flutter kicks. We rotated each round between merkins and flutter kicks.

    After 6 rounds we moseyed over the bridge and a little further down the water front. We then did a 10 light pole doozy. We did 5 burpees at each light pole while alternating between bear crawls and jogging to the poles. So, we bear crawled to light pole 1, did 5 burpees, ran to light pole 2, did 5 burpees and so forth until we reached light pole 10 and completed 50 burpees.

    Next, we moseyed back to the bridge for 4 more rounds of alternating merkins (inclined this time) and flutter kicks. Then it was back to the warmup spot for 25 step-ups, 20 shoulder taps, 15 dips, 10 squats, and 5 8-count bodybuilders.

    To close it out, we did 20 dying cockroaches, 20 wife pleasers, and 20 leg raises. Then back to the flag for CoT.