F3 New Orleans

Author: Jingle Vader

  • Why six was afraid of seven

    So several years ago, YHC’s 2.0 asked him why six was afraid of seven? Because seven eight (ate) nine.  I still laugh at the thought of this seven-year old’s joke, which I suspect to be Sacred Heart lore that perhaps originated from Hawg’s days there many moons ago.  Anyway, with nine PAX and YHC turning 56 (7×8) today, the joke seems apropos.  [Hint, Amnesty: QHC needs some more F2 events!]

    After a terse disclaimer, the PAX was off to the rock pile for the first COP:

    • SSHs 56xIC (with much mumblechatter, and Rudy’s poor attempt to imitate YHC at counting)
    • Low Slow Squats 20xIC
    • Squat Pulses 20xIC (where are ya, Shorty?  They were for you!)
    • Peter Parkers 20xIC
    • Mount Climbers 20xIC
    • Parker Peters 20xIC
    • Merkins 20xIC

    Time to get some rocks to mosey to the open field for COT2, namely, some Elevens.  At the row of trees on the far side of the field, bench presses from 1 to 10 and at the row of trees on the near side of the field, squats with rock from 10 to 1; moseying with rocks in between.  That’s 55 bench presses, and 55 squats.  In honor of YHC and Marlin, he commanded one additional of each for the magical 7×8=56.

    After a mosey to the benches under the pavilion, time for COT3 (a modified, as in very modified, Sparticus: where were you this morning, Amnesty?  This one was for you!):

    • Right Leg Step Ups with rocks 20xIC
    • Dips 20xIC
    • Left Leg Step Ups with rocks 20xIC
    • Irkins 20xIC

    Mosey to the wall for a one-minute sit with your rocks.  Then mosey back to the rock pill for a closing Circle of Mary after ten burpees:

    • Russian Twists with rocks 20xIC
    • Dying Cockroach 20xIC
    • Flutter kicks with rocks 20xIC
    • Penguins 20xIC
    • Hello Dolly with rocks 20xIC

    Another ten burpees, then return rocks, mosey to the flag (TClaps to Rudy for bringing one) to close out with ten more burpees.

    Name-O-Rama, Announcement and a closing COT with thanks for a great Birthday Q.  Jingle Vader

  • Oops, it’s me again.

    It’s been gloomy this week.  A good resbit before the Turkish steam bath that is soon to arrive.  QHC sees a lonely silhouette of a PAX ready to go.  It’s Hand-Grenada, our FNG from Monday gratis Walleye.  He’s nervously peering into the chasm for the pumping station into Pontiff.  It’s scary business.  But not nearly as scary as when QHC asked who’s today’s Q and was told he was!  Actually, that doesn’t frighten QHC any more.  I just hope my on-the-cuff DownPainMents aren’t too dull, whiskey-dick-ish (TClaps to Tool for the vocab drills) or repetitive.  So with an opportunity for a real Disclaimer (because a professional trainer would know he’s up), the PAX is off–for a distance of about twelve feet.

    COP1:

    • SSHs ICx20
    • Inchworm (gratis YSR at the Birdcage this week) ICx10
    • Moroccan Casbah (gratis The Rev from about a year ago or so) [squat while twisting arms] ICx20
    • Mountain Climbers ICx20

    The PAX gets two rocks: big and bigger for COP2:

    • Overhead press ICx20
    • Curls ICx20
    • Nape scratchers (tricep lifts) ICx20
    • Rows ICx20
    • Bench press on our 6s ICx20
    • Low slow squats ICx20

    Rinse and repeat, but with ICx15 (and regular squats instead of LSS); rinse and repeat again, but with ICx10 (again regular squats instead of LLS); then rinse and repeat again–kinda:

    • Overhead press ICx5 (but real slow, 20 count, for #5)
    • Curls ICx5
    • Nape scratchers ICxG (but real slow, 20 count, for #5)
    • Rows ICx5
    • Bench press ICx5 (hold last for 20 count)
    • Low slow squats (for a total of 25 LLS and 25 regular squats) ICx5

    Time for some relaxing at the wall:

    • People’s chair for a long-ass time, with overheads ICx10 and curls ICx10 and sitting some more
    • Rest oh so briefly
    • People’s chair again for not at long: overheads ICx10, curls ICx10, hold rock out 30 seconds.

    Mosey back (10 feet) for Circle of Mary:

    • Flutter kicks with rocks ICx20
    • LBTs ICx20
    • Hello Dollys with rocks ICx20
    • Penguins ICx20
    • Rosalitas with rocks ICx20
    • WWII situps ICx20
    • Russian twists with rocks ICx20
    • LCBs with rocks ICx20

    And it’s 6:15.  Countoff, Name-o-Rama, Shout Outs and closing prayer from HVAC.  Tclaps to Hand-Grenada for two posts in his first week.  Jingle Vader

  • Friday windup

    Hawg sent around a text the night before that there was no Q for the morning Post.  QHC stepped up to the plate two weeks ago and didn’t want to hog the honor, but wondered who would do so.  As YHC meandered over to the AO, he saw a familiar silhouette moseying his way: HVAC.  Just the two of us?  We’d split.  As we started, Abacus joined in, as Rudy lapped up a few times for his marathon training.  TClaps to anyone who runs or trains for marathons: those are not meant for normal humans.

    Anyway, HVAC started off with a bang–as usual.  I used to think Hawgcycle was the King of no pauses.  But then there was HVAC.  Keep us pushed to the max.  If I remember, the first COP was something like:

    • SSHs 20xIC
    • Windmills 20xIC
    • One-two-threes (touch toes, then hips and praise Jesus) 20xIC
    • Peter Parkers
    • Mountain Climbers
    • Bicycles (legs circling with hips high in the air)
    • Russian twists
    • Something else evil and fast
    • more Bicycles
    • Something else evil and fast
    • Evil yoga stretches: warriors, etc.

    Then a handoff to YHC, so we mosey to the nearby fence for a People’s Chair for about a minute OR SO.  Mosey to the rock pile to pick up rocks not SO big.

    • Overhead press 20xIC
    • Curls 20xIC
    • Tricep lifts behind the head 20xIC
    • Deadlifts 20xIC
    • Squats 20xIC

    Rinse and repeat with 15xIC, then with 10xIC and finally with 5xIC.  Mosey back to the fence with our rocks for some more People’s Chair.  About half of minute and then overhead presses 10xIC and then curls 10xIC and a short cool off for maybe another 15 seconds.  Mosey back for a Circle of Mary burdened:

    • Russian twists with rocks 20xIC
    • Flutter kicks with rocks 20xIC
    • Hello Dollys with rocks 20xIC
    • Penguins 20xIC
    • Slow, slow merkins 10xIC

    And as the PAX circled up for a countoff and name-o-rama, Rudy joined us with his sweaty self (no bleeding nipples yet; that was the next morning).  COT for all that is good.

    Jingle Vader

  • Friday is great day for DownPainMents

    Get after YHC, cuz he’s waiting too long to post back blasts and now can’t remember squat–other than it was achy.  So after a disclaimer, THE THANG.

    Warm up with some SSHs, Low Slow Squats, Slow Sun Gods, and surely someone on our faces.

    Then gets some rocks to mosey to the bleachers for:

    • Bench Presses 20xIC
    • Squats 20xIC
    • Dead Lifts 20xIC
    • Curls 20xIC

    Rinse and repeat with 15xIC, then 10xIC and finally 5xIC.

    Saunter to the fence for some people’s chair–some times with rocks, some times without.  Holding your rock out in front for more than a few seconds sux big time.

    Circle of Mary: lots of stuff with and without rocks.  [Putins with rocks is of course a favorite of YHC.]  Close out with 10 burpees.

    Countoff, Namorama and COT.  Thanks, JV

  • February’s short so get at it

    YHC can’t remember much of that day, except that it was coolish.  After a Warm-up around the fountain, the PAX moseyed to breakfront for some suicides with the 8 planters: one inclined merkin at the first planter, and one burpee at the start; then two IMs at the second planter and two burpees at the start; etc. to 8 and 8 with a dead YHC.

    Mosey to the House of Pain for a short circuit of levee chase with five burpees at the top for PAX1, Catalina Winemixers for PAX2, step-ups for PAX3 and pull-ups for PAX4.  Although YHC had intended to rinse and repeat at least one more time, the PAX apparently was disturbing an amorous couple in a hammock near the House of Pain, so the PAX moseyed on after the first round to the Land of H8.

    Although YHC can’t remember exactly, it involved running up and down with some exercise in between.  Duh…

    Then a mosey back to the flag for a Circle of Mary, Countoff, Name-O-Rama, and COT.  Sorry for the sketchy memory, JV

  • Is that Love in the Air? No, it’s duck s**t.

    Ash Wednesday and Valentine’s Day don’t coincide very often.  It’s a confusing mash-up.  What to do?  After the Disclaimer, THE THANG:

    Warm Up at the Newman(?) Bandstand:

    • SSH 25xIC
    • Low Slow Squats 25xIC
    • Frankensteins 25xIC
    • Mountain Climbers 25xIC

    Mosey about a quarter of the way around the park counterclockwise, for a Ring of Fire: bear crawl counterclockwise (avoiding the duck greetings), then the PAX do 7 merkins each around the circle; then more bear crawls counterclockwise (avoid the light pole!), then big boy situps 10xIC.

    Continue moseying to the front of the park at the fountain:

    • Derkins 20xIC (stop complaining: YHC cut it short)
    • Right-Leg Step Ups 20xIC
    • Dips 20xIC
    • Left-Leg Step Ups 20xIC

    Mosey to the Hurst Street entrance for some Mary:

    • LBTs 25xIC
    • Flutter Kicks 25xIC
    • Penguins 25xIC
    • Hello Dollys 25xIC
    • Russian Twists 25xIC

    Indian Run in two lines to the gym near Magazine, where the PAX broke up into four groups:

    • pull-ups 10 for the count
    • lunges AMRAP
    • merkins AMRAP
    • squats AMRAP

    Mosey across the golf course for a wrap-up with Countoff, Name-O-Rama and COT for Lent and Valentine’s Day.  Thanks for letting old timers be the Q, Jingle Vader

  • Defrosting the pipes

    In case you didn’t notice, it was a bit nippy last week.  The PAX count was correspondingly a bit low.  The plumbers will now be gainfully employed in overdrive for a few weeks.  So it’s time to get back to work.  The THANG.

    Warm up with mumblechatter:

    • SSHs ICx25
    • Frankensteins ICx25
    • Low Slow Squats ICx25
    • Mountain Climbers ICx25

    A rock for each man and mosey to the track for a steady plan:

    • Overhead press ICx20
    • Curls ICx20
    • Rows ICx20
    • Squats ICx20

    Mosey around the track, stopping each quarter, first to do 20 merks, then 15, then 10 and closing out with 5.  Rinse and repeat the rock circle with ICx15.  Mosey around the track in the other direction, again with 20, then 15, then 10 and finally 5 merks at each quarter.

    Time for a break on our sixes for 10 Russian Twists with the rock and then back to a rinse and repeat the rock circle with ICx10.  Mosey around the track in the original direction: same drill: 20, 15, 10, 5.  Close out the track work with a final rinse and repeat of the rock circle with ICx5.

    Mosey back towards the rock pile for a few minutes of Mary:

    • Russian Twists with rock ICx20
    • Flutter kicks with rock ICx20
    • Hello Dollys with rock ICx20
    • Rosalita with rock ICx20
    • LBCs with rock ICx20
    • Low plank sans rock 1 minute

    Return rocks and mosey back to the virtual flag for countoff, Namorama, announcements, intentions and thanks to Sky Q.  T-Claps to Mahatma for leaving us in the dust.  Keep the heat going, Jingle Vader

  • Twelfth Morning… and no wise (or other) men in sight

    GroupMe mumblechatter Thurs pm: who’s Q at The Uptowner?  Having vowed to avoid diarrhea of the smartphone, YHC figured someone would respond and step up, but it was getting late, so he never checked further.

    Alarm at 5ish Fri am: ggrrr!  To fartsack or not to fartsack, that is the question.  Whether tis nobler in the bod to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous weather and to lift rocks against a sea of troubles and by tossing hurl them.  To die, to dream–no more–and by sleep we say end the bodyache, and the thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir to!  Ahh, blue pill bull schmill, I’m posting.

    5:23pm at Pontiff: Brr.  It’s cold and windy.  Where’s the flag?  Where’s another PAX?  I suppose I’ll wait a few more minutes and then ditch it if no one shows up.  YHC has no watch, so he waits for what he thinks is about 5 minutes.  No Rudy making his usual Friday loops.  No Hawg (he’s become a figment of our cyber imagination: hope all’s well!).  No Triple Shift with his labeled rocks.  No Frac Sac.  No Tool.  No Amnesty.  No Marlin (after all it’s not Monday).  No surprise visit from Kimchee or Reluctant Yankee.  After three posts this week, no Shorty.  No Cowbell (I’m forgetting what he looks like).  No Rev Sox.  No tunes from Bogey.  No lithe Walleye.  No nobody.

    What’s a guy to do?  Oh well, might as well be the Q.  Hopefully, the PAX will keep up and keep the mumblechatter to a minimum.  So get to The THANG!

    • SSHs x100
    • Imperial Walkers x50
    • Hillbillies x50
    • Squats x100
    • Sun gods x50 each way

    Select a rock (one that Triple Shift conveniently marked 30) for some 25-20-15-10-5:

    • Overhead shoulder lifts x25
    • Curls x25
    • Tricep behind the head curls x25
    • Deadlifts x25
    • Squats x25
    • Bench press on six x25
    • Russian twists x25

    Pause for some merkins, hindu planks (or, the REAL wife  pleasers: plank where you go at it like you mean it), etc. and then a minute or so on the wall (sometimes with rock, sometimes without) and then rinse and repeat with a 20 count; then R&R again with a 15 count; etc. for 10 and then 5.

    Somewhere in this midst of this routine, where the Q was riding hard on the PAX to keep up great form and precision, out from a distance YHC did espy Stella and her two fair companions.  This ebon maid today had no worry of which PAX to greet: her focus was laserlike and not distracted from a plethora of PAX to abuse.  She came charging at YHC like, well, like Stella.  Kapow: she strikes, she wins.  YHC had been in people’s chair for 40 seconds or so when he went crashing to the ground.  A good distraction, but back to the THANG.

    After the last set of merks after 5 putins, YHC sealed the deal with ten burpees.  The countoff and namorama didn’t take long.  Thanks for this twelfth day of Christmas.  YHC got back to his car: 6:20.  Sorry, Yankee, I went over a few minutes.  If you’d been there, you could have kept me more accountable.  The book of the Bible YHC is most drawn to is Job: it’s tough, it’s cruel and ultimately it’s true and it’s comforting.  Remember: we’re not in it alone, and we’re not in charge of the world.  But we’re each responsible for ourselves, with the Sky Q ever watching our backs (and sides and fronts and hearts and minds and souls).  The toughest critic is your inner voice: keep it talkin’.  See what trouble YHC gets into when he’s a PAX of one: don’t let it happen again!

    Love for the new year, Jingle Vader

  • High chance of humidity

    It was thundering when YHC woke up.  Should he fartsack or go out?  Red pill, blue pill?  A little rain never hurt nobody.  Up and at ’em, it is.  When YHC arrived, two guys were in the gloom in front of the fence: an FNG and his dad, Rigs, a buddy of El Guapo.  Then Walleye, then Tool and Amnesty, and finally, with a coffee cup in his mouth, in bikes Marlin.  YHC gives a real disclaimer (first in probably two years), and the PAX is off for The Thang.

    Warm-Up COP:

    • Imperial Walkers 31xIC
    • Squats 31xIC
    • SSHs 31xIC
    • Mountain Climbers 31xIC

    The PAX selects their favorite rocks (YHC got one that Triple Shift marked as weighing 30 lbs) for another COP:

    • Shoulder press, curl, dead lift, squat and then (cuz the ground was wet) bench press, each 20xIC
    • Rinse and repeat for 16xIC, then 12xIC, then 8xIC and finally 4xIC.

    Lunge walk half away across the field to a line of trees, and then lunge watch to the far side of the field to the edge of the parking lot for some Mericana on the parking pumpers: regular merkins 10xIC, diamond merkins 10xIC and wide merkins 10xIC.

    Mosey back towards the rock pile for a Circle of Mary:

    • LBCs 25xIC
    • Flutter Kicks 25xIC
    • Penguins 25xIC
    • Box Cutters 25xIC
    • Wife Pleasers (for our FNG) 25xIC

    Finish off with ten burpees OYO, then return rocks and mosey back to the virtual flag for Countoff, Name-o-Rama (where the PAX after much deliberation named the FNG, who’s a senior at LSU and wants to go to vet school and is the son of Rigs, Dead Pets), and Circle of Trust.

    Peace, Jingle Vader

  • Tryptophan Fartsackers Anonymous

    Everyone knows that the Thanksgiving Day feast needs a good sweat-out.  So there will surely be a large number of HIM this morning.  The trouble with YHC is that he thinks too much sometimes.  Besides YHC, just one lonely PAX appeared in the gloom.  T-Claps to Tool, my wingman for the morning.  A short disclaimer leads to The Thang, which is always more intense with a smaller PAX.

    Warm Up

    • SSHs 30xIC (YHC lied before; he does sometimes start with SSHs)
    • Low-Slow Squats 30xIC
    • Merkins 22xIC
    • Hillbillies(?) 30xIC
    • Merkins 8xIC (because YHC can’t count)

    Get a pair of rocks: one medium, one bigger.  [Not Hawg Big, but just bigger]

    • Elf on the Right Shelf 16xIC (smaller rock)
    • Squats 16xIC (larger rock)
    • Dead Lift 16xIC (larger rock)
    • Squats 16xIC (smaller rock)
    • Bench Press 16xIC (larger rock)

    Rinse and repeat with just 12, then with just 8 and finally with just 4.  Then a round of skull crushers: interlocking situps passing a rock from the ground overhead to the other PAX, 25 per HIM for a total of 50.

    Wall of Pain

    • Sit for a while with whatever rock
    • Continue sitting for shoulder presses 10xIC?
    • Continue sitting for some more
    • VERY short rest
    • Sit some more
    • Continue sitting for some curls 10xIC?
    • Continue sitting till the legs start shaking, then continue sitting some more.

    Wobble over for a few minutes of Mary

    • Dr. W (since Side Effects had been in town) 10xIC
    • Flutter Kicks 25xIC
    • Dying Cockroach 25xIC
    • LBCx 25XIC
    • One or two other things YHC can’t remember, probably 25xIC

    A minute left, so 10 burpees OYO.

    A quick and efficient Countoff, Name-o-Rama and short COT for thanks for all.  JV