F3 New Orleans

Author: Hawgcycle

  • Banzai!!!!

    The opportunity to Q The Birdcage the morning of the Gnarly Nutria presented itself yesterday and I jumped at it.  Immediately, I started brainstorming my Kamikaze Q –  come in hard and heavy, destroy my legs, but take out as many Uptowners along the way as possible.  What would I do? 45 minutes of Monkey Humpers? Run 3 laps around Audubon? Sprint-o-rama? Boo-boo bear crawls?  Quadraphilia?  F3 provides lots of good leg breaking choices.  Unfortunately, my plan would be contingent on me being im better shape then these guys and that is unfortunately not the case.  Kamikazes can’t do much good if they don’t have the power to destroy their target.  It’s like a sacrifice bunt with two outs (which may have been a more apt name for this backblast).  In the end, I chose a path I could finish, at least almost.

    100 Burpee Warm-Up

    • 20 burpees
    • 20 Hillbillies, 15 Windmills, 15 Good Mornings
    • Burpees EMOM: 12, 12, 12,12, 10, 10
    • Parker Peter x 20, Monkey Humpers x 20, Daft Punk? x 28
    • 12 Burpees

    The Thang

    We moseyed aimlessly, as I was hoping to get everyone’s shoes sufficiently wet and slightly heavier.  Once I realized I couldn’t break them, this became my best opportunity for sabotage.  We ended up at the shelter for some Red Hot Chili Pepper.

    • 8 Bulgarian Split Leg Lunges with the right leg, 16 Derkins, 8 Bulgarian Split Leg Lunges with the left leg, 16 Irkins
    • 6 BSLLRL, 6 Derkins, 6 BSLLLL, 6 Irkins,  (G Spot disappears?)
    • 4….
    • 2….

    We then moseyed about 50 feet to open area for our last chance at some celebratory 3-6-3 exercises.  3 Super Slow Cadence reps, holding position at the end.  Then 6 regular cadence reps, holding position at the end.  Ending with 3 more super slow cadence reps.  We did squats, monkey humpers, merkins, right leg lunges, and left leg lunges.

    Mariah took over and finished us off with some Mary.  Hello Dolly x 25 followed by Flutter Kicks x 25 (feet don’t touch the ground), Freddie Mercuries x 25, oblique crunches (each side) x 25, and a Protractor (15, 45, 90, 45, 2, 15, 45)

    Back to the shovel flag, naming our FNG, and closing it out with a prayer

    NMM

    • I had good intentions, but I can’t say the mission was successful.  I’m going to need back up next year.
    • Perhaps I knocked out G-Spot, but that seems highly unlikely, seeing as he wears a weighted vest and was Larry Birding me the last time I Q’d.  His schedule is tight and he always leaves prior to the COT.  This time he left much earlier.  Yankee said it’s the first time someone’s gone AWOL Uptown.  I’m taking that as a compliment, although I’m pretty sure it wasn’t.
    • We didn’t run much today.  Some may think it’s because we have the Gnarly Nutria tonight, but I ain’t going to lie:  Being this close to the zoo, I had every intention of staying close to our cars.
    • FNG Ocho Cinco is from Cincinnati.  He couldn’t be Ocho Seis, cause we got one of those.
    • Speaking of, Happy Birthday to the aforementioned Ocho Seis.
    • I’m over three years in and still can’t do a complete Red Hot Chili Pepper.  It’s a goal.
    • Looking forward to tonight.  Here’s to having fun and World Domination.

     

     

     

     

  • RED Friday – Jenkins Hero WOD

    8 men (1 FNG) posted for a RED Friday workout tribute to British serviceman Garreth Jenkins.

    Warm-up

    SSH x 20 (I could tell Frac was disappointed), Imperial Walkers x 20, Windmills x 15, then some self-love on your own while YHC gave the instructions to…

    The Thang

    Partner up for

    • 50 Burpees
    • 400 meter run
    • 50 Kettle Rock Swings
    • 400 meter run
    • 50 Pull-ups
    • 400 meter run
    • 50 Merkins
    • 400 meter run

    Partners split reps for exercises however they want for 50 cumulative, then run the 400 meters together.  Complete as many rounds as possible in the 40 minutes.

    NMM

    • First time I’ve seen Mahatma and T-Shift since the bike accident last week.  Glad to see them both.
    • Rocket works at Lockhead Martin and builds cool space vehicles.  I’m pretty jealous.  He walked away with a pretty good name, mainly because we want him to like us and post at the Gnarly Nutria.
    • I’ve never seen Fracsac run so hard.  He was partnered with Triple Shift and I think he was worried that Triple was going to run over him.
    • You would think I would be faster at burpees.  After all, the man behind the curtain running the @f3nation twitter feed posted a video of my perfect barefoot burpee form as a lesson for all.  Yet, I could not keep up with Mahatma.
    • Abacus continues to stand out among the Pax with his understanding of the RED Friday dress code.
    • Notre Dame should hire Walleye as a recruiter.  Show up to Audubon Park at 2100 hours on July 18th and you will see what I mean.

  • Where’s Our Hawaiian Shirts?

    Nip and El Guapo showed up early to Dome Patrol anticipating their new Hawaiian shirts flown straight from Camden Yards.  We don’t know how many Swampcock was able to secure from his Baltimore Birthday Bash last weekend, but we are hoping it is enough for our LARC debut at the Blue Ridge Relay.  YHC showed up late as usual.  I found Nip and El Guapo in boring old running clothes descending the Champion Square Garage.  No Swampcock or Oriole clad Hawaiian shirts in sight.  Oh well.

    We ran what has become the standard DP route:  4.5 miles, 6 Garages.  We held a Triangle of Trust and called it a morning.

    -Hawg

  • The Ultimate 4th of July Beatdown

    18 Pax exercised their freedoms this morning by posting at The Birdcage.  This included Da Parish, making his Birdcage debut.  I believe it may have also been Mariah’s Birdcage debut as he has completed the move from Charlotte.  Metro’s loss is our gain.

    Pledge of Allegiance

    We moseyed to the World War I museum and recited the Pledge.  This is a very historical spot that doesn’t get much recognition.  The Memorial itself has the names of the Lousiana residents that sacrificed their life during World War I.  Additionally there are six Live Oaks surrounding the memorial that were all planted by military heroes from around the world:  2 from France, 1 from the U.S., 1 from Italy, 1 from Great Britain, and 1 from Japan.  All planted between 1920-1935.

    Warm-up

    30 SSH; 20 Imperial Squat Walkers; 15 Windmills; 25 Peter Parkers; 25 Mountain Climbers; 25 Parker Peters

    1776 Revolution

    Mosey to the Zoo side of Magazine for a 4th of July modification of The Suck.  One revolution consists of  1 burpee, 7 merkins, 7 side straddle hops, and 6 squat jumps.  After completing each revolution, yell out Huzzah.  Complete as many revolutions as possible in 3 minutes.  We took a one minute rest and repeated it, this time yelling out the number of each revolution.  It sounded like most men completed between 5 and 8 revolutions.

    Bernie Sanders Tabata

    We moseyed to the soccer goal for a two rounds of modified tabata.  4 men on the did the Bernie Sanders on the soccer goal (L hangs for as long as you can hang – don’t give up), while everyone else did the prescribed exercise (Merkins, Squats, or Rower Sit-ups (shout out to this month’s ISI)).  After the last Bernie dropped out (or Q called it) we rotated in 4 new Bernies and a new exercise for everyone else.  We went through 10 rounds – 4 merkins, 3 Squats, and 3 Rower Situps.

    Sprint

    We partnered up and raced to the other side of the field (about 80 yards)

    Ultimate

    We finished the workout with a 15 minute game of F3 Ultimate.  Two Merkins on each change of possession for the team losing possession.  10 burpees each time your team gives up a score.  Let’s just say that this was a defensive struggle, despite the advantage to the offense.  The final score was 1-0.

    COT

    We moseyed back across Magazine for a holiday picture by the flag.  We closed with a prayer remembering those service men and women away from their families today as the serve our country.

    Then YHC had to pay my burpee bet to Da Parish for the Hog’s baseball losses to LSU this season.  66 burpees in LSU paraphernalia.  Thanks to JV for finishing with me.

     

     

  • Almost, Really Close, 2018 National Champions

    I took the opportunity this morning to celebrate Arkansas’ infamous runner-up in the College World Series.  Hoping to be able to work in groups of three, we had nine as we took off toward the Rock Pile.  Picked up JV along the way, making 10….hmm not divisible by 3.  Then we picked up Hand Grenada for 11….hmm still not divisible by 3.  Luckily I could count on my good friend Amnesty to show up during the warm-up, saving me from having to think too hard.

    Ninth Inning, 2 outs, man on 3rd.  Oregon State batter pops up along the right field line.  Arkansas second baseman Carson Shaddy takes off like his hair is on fire, looking to be the man that secures Arkansas’ first Baseball National Championship.  Unfortunately he overruns the pop up by about 6 feet.

    We continue our initial mosey past the rock-pile as we overrun our normal warm-up spot, finally stopping to warm-up near the T-ball field.

    SSH x 30; Peter Parker x 26; Windmills x 14; Parker Peter x 26; Squats x 26; Hillbillies x 26 (It was after the squats that Rudy figured out the reason for the 26 count exercises)

    As the pop-up hung in the air, the right fielder, second baseman, and first baseman all converged on it as it dropped between them.

    Next we headed to The Hill where we encircled the hill and did a crawl-bear, converging at the top, then bear crawled back done.  Round 2 was the most painful round as we repeated the crawl-bear convergence twice.  Our personal failures in round 2 lead to a round three where we did the crawl-bear convergence one final time.

    Arkansas, one of the nation’s most prolific offenses all year long, failed to hit a home run in the final three game series.  In fact, I think they only had 3 extra base hits in the three games.

    It was time for some strength training.  Not being afraid of failure,we grabbed the largest rocks we could safely workout with and circled up for some 3-6-3 reps.  That’s 3 super slow reps, followed by 6 normal cadence reps, and finishing with 3 more super slow reps.  Sets included Curls, Shoulder Presses, Rows, Squats, and Calf Raises

    In case you missed the game, after the three players allowed the pop up to fall, the Oregon State player hit a single tying the game at three.  The next batter hit a two-run homerun as OSU went on to win the game and take the series the next day.  A little better communication and teamwork by those three and things would have been much different.  

    We took our rocks to the football field and divided up into groups of three for some teamwork exercise.  Rocks were placed on each end of the field.  Pax 1 does Shoulder Presses.  Pax two runs to the other end of the field (sin rock) to relieve Pax3 who is doing Bench Presses.  This continues until each team reaches 300 Shoulder Presses and 300 Bench Presses cumulative.

    After the game was over, I felt like punching someone.

    We dropped our rocks back off at the pile and circled up for some Nolan Ryan’s.  26 with the right hand and 27 with the left.  There’s always next year.

    NMM

    • Welcome to FNG Hunchback.  He came with Rudy and Rudy made him wear Notre Dame shorts to the workout.  No idea if he really likes ND or not.
    • No one else seems to be wearing flip flops to the workouts.  Give it time.
    • The Crawl-Bear was a crowd pleaser
    • Thoughts of Mahatma and Triple as they recover from their bike accident.
    • Remind me to have a Snickers on hand for Rudy during the COT.
    • Glad to see three Uptowners representing this morning at Rock City.  The World is all inclusive.

     

     

     

     

  • Dome Patrol

    The LARC took to the streets of Downtown New Orleans for another installment of the Dome Patrol.  YHC arrived a little late, I took a shortcut to catch-up to the much faster runners that were there on time.

    The Thang

    An approximately 4.5 mile run.  Up the Dome ramp on Poydras, down the dome ramp by Champions Square and Dave Dixon Dr.  Up the Champions Square Garage 2 times.  Then we crossed Dave Dixon Dr. and ran up the Hyatt Parking Garage 3 times.  Back to the Champions Square Garage for a final climb.  We ran back to whence we came via the Dome ramps.  Here is a visual.

    Parking garages wreak a little havoc on GPS.

    -Hawg

     

     

     

  • Rarajipari at the Stomp

    El Guapo:  When Hawg sent the message on GroupMe last night that we would be playing Rarajipari at the Stomp, I knew I had to be there.  I’m running the Blue Ridge Relay in September and I’m taking every opportunity that I can to train.  I also thought it would be a good opportunity to see how Hawg’s training is going.  Truthfully, I’ve been a little concerned.  He set up a June challenge for us on MapMyRun.  They idea was to run at least 70 miles in the month of June.  86 and Swampcock are already over a hundred.  Everyone else on the team is around 50-60.  Hawg has run…..11.  Eleven miles.  that’s about a third of a mile per day.  A third of a mile per day.  He also looks a little overweight.  Well, maybe more than a little.  I’m not sure he’s training.

    Rudy:  You have met Hawg right?  What about him made you think he knows what training is?  I didn’t even know he was still doing F3.

    Da Parish:  Hawg made a burpee bet with me on the LSU – Arkansas series this year and then went double or nothing on the SEC tourney.  He owes me 66 burpees at the Mothership, and I haven’t seen him since.

    Hawg:  I got a lot of family commitments.

    Stubhub:  Now that school is out, I’m glad to be back to working out with the guys.  I’ve been back for a while, but Hawg kept making a big deal about my “kotter” today.  I just let him go on and didn’t say anything.  My kotter was a month ago.  I’m not sure the last time he posted.  When he taught my girls in high school my wife and I used to talk about how we weren’t real sure he knew what he was doing.  Seeing him operate at F3….my opinion hasn’t really changed.

    Bongo:  “We gotta get out while we’re young, ‘Cause tramps like us, baby we were born to run..”

    Triple Shift:  Hawg pulls up, at 5:30 mind you, with a couple of baseballs.  We are supposed to be playing Rarajipari.  They actually make balls for that, but he’s going to use baseballs.  What kind of Mickey Mouse operation is this?

    Stubhub:  So as soon as we take off, my calf starts acting up again.  I injured it last week.  Let’s see…what was I doing when I injured it?  Oh yeah, I was at an F3 workout.

    Hawg: So Stubhub pulls up lame right out of the gate.  I felt so bad for him.  His first day back in a year and that happens.

    Stubhub: ….

    Cornbread:  T-claps to Stubhub.  He stuck around and got some work in and met us for the COT.  A lesser man would have gone home.

    Tool:  I was excited about the team I was assigned to – Me, T-Shift, Rudy, and El Guapo.  We are all strong runners and I can get to Laborde Mountain in my sleep.  I’ve actually done it a couple of times after one of our block parties.  At least, I think that’s how I got there.

    El Guapo:  We came out of the gate with the early lead, but we start to hear heavy breathing around Diagonal Ave.  We knew JV was out of town, so it had to be Hawg.

    Tool:  Things were going well, until Diagonal Ave.  Rudy and El Guapo must have gotten spooked and they took off….fast.  As Cornbread caught up to me and Triple, I could see Rudy and El Guapo crossing Harrison.  They were heading into the Couturie Forest using the path on the right.  Ironic as it is, the path on the right is wrong, but they were too far gone to hear me.

    Da Parish: Our team entered the Couturie Forest with Tool and Triple, but Rudy and El Guapo were already in there.  Laborde Mountain is only few hundred yards or so.  Having gone to Nichols, I’m familiar with losing and this had loss written all over it.

    Cornbread:  So kicking this baseball down the street is pretty easy, but once you get into the woods it gets a lot harder.  That’s when Hawg tells me and Da Parish, “I’ll run ahead and make sure we are going the right way.  You guys take care of the ball.”  …. Thanks Hawg.

    Da Parish:  We got to the top of Laborde Mountain and there was not a Rudy or El Guapo in sight.  We won!  I knew those Basin Runs would pay off.  Have I ever mentioned that there’s a run every Thursday night at The Basin?

    Hawgcycle:  Given the ISI this month, I thought we would do some merkins while we waited for the other team to straggle in.  Knowing that Triple Shift was there, I counted the cadence very slowly, making sure everyone had time to do them in perfect form.

    Tool:  Bongo and I split up to look for Rudy and El Guapo, hoping to find them in time to still win.  When we got to the top, the other team was there.  Wait, where’s Bongo?

    Bongo:  “All by myself, Don’t want to be, all by myself…anymore.  All by myself, Don’t want to be….

    Triple Shift: So Hawg finishes the merkins and proudly exclaims “That’s 50 more toward this month’s challenge.”  If he has done the rest of his merkins the way he did those 50…. I’d say he’s done…..zero merkins this month.

    Tool:  Hey guys – we need to go get Bongo.  No man left behind

    All:  No Man left behind!

    Stubhub:  ….

    Cornbread:  Unfortunately finding your way back from Laborde Mountain is easier than finding your way there, even for Rudy.

    Hawg:  We had lost sight of El Guapo and Rudy, by the time we passed the Foundry.

    Rudy:  I lost sight of El Guapo by the time I passed the Foundry.

    El Guapo:  Okay.  I’m certain Hawg’s not training.

     

     

     

     

  • RED Friday – Tommy Mac

    This year the first Friday of the month has been RED Friday at The Uptowner.  I have to give credit to F3 Greenwood.  I stole their idea and sometimes steal their workouts.  Today we celebrated the life and service of Sgt. Thomas MacPherson.  More on him in the NMM.

    Conditions: 81 degrees and 91% Humidity (Heat Index of 89 in the gloom)

    Equipment:  Rocks Ranging from 30 – 50 pounds

    Warm-up:  SSH x 31: IW x 31; Abe Vigodas x 10; Good Mornings x 10; Moroccan Night Club x 31; Self-love x 10; Copperhead Squats x 10

    The Tommy Mac uses 5 different lifts, so we practiced a few with the rocks.  These lifts actually require a barbell, so we made some slight modifications in order to perform them

    • Thrusters – Squat, then press rock above head.
    • Power Snatches – Pick up rock from the ground, lift over head, then throw it back on the ground real manly like.
    • Push Jerks – Shoulder Presses with a rock that’s too heavy to shoulder press.
    • Hang Squat Cleans – Curl the rock, then squat.
    • Overhead Squats – Just keep the rock at chest and squat.  Don’t get crazy.

    The Thang

    • 12 Burpees
    • 12 Thrusters
    • 12 Burpees
    • 12 Power Snatches
    • 12 Burpees
    • 12 Hang Squat Cleans
    • 12 Burpees
    • 12 Overhead Squats

    We went AMRAP.  I believe everyone completed 2 rounds in 28 minutes, some started a 3rd before time was up.

    NMM

    Today’s workout was in honor of Thomas MacPherson.  Sgt. Thomas R. MacPherson, 26, was killed in action on October 12, 2012 by enemy forces during a heavy firefight while conducting combat operations in Ghazni Province, Afghanistan. He was leading an assault against an enemy position when he was mortally wounded by small arms fire.

    MacPherson was a team leader assigned to Company D, 2nd Battalion, 75th Ranger Regiment at Joint Base Lewis-McChord, Wash. He previously served one deployment to Iraq and this was his fourth deployment to Afghanistan.

    The “Tommy Mac” Hero WOD was created by elite-level coach Rudy Nielsen of CrossFit Outlaw (Alexandria, VA, USA), who first posted the workout on his “The Outlaw Way” blog as the workout of the day for October 27, 2012. The post included the following quote from Tommy’s former Platoon Leader:

    “The whole thing with Tommy is that he embodies everything that’s right about Ranger Battalion. He held the position of Ranger Team Leader which is literally the tip of the spear. He was the consummate, quiet professional—he expected absolutely zero recognition for what he did. He loved his job because he was a born protector. He was perfectly content to carry out his life’s work under the cover of darkness, with his and his comrades’ actions to remain forever under the cloak of shadows. He died doing what he loved; protecting all of us. What stood out about Tommy the most was his maturity beyond his years. I believe it was the fact that he was the older brother of younger siblings, but like another Sgt. said “Tommy wasn’t one of those guys who joined the Army and grew into a man. He joined as a man and grew others.” He left behind his beautiful wife wife, Claudia MacPherson, and their son, Brayden.”

    Lagniappe

    • It was great to be joined by 3 actual Uptowners at The Uptowner.  I believe that is equal to the number of Uptowners that have posted in the past year.  If Uptowners ever outnumber the World at the Uptowner, we may consider a name change.  These Uptowners handled themselves admirably.  Tools always said an Uptowner would never suvive the Uptowner, but these three proved him wrong.  I hypothesize that since they are relatively new to F3, they have not been sufficiently softened by the tickle fights that occur at the Skinny.  Let’s get Douille or Yankee out here and see what happens then.
    • It was agreed by all that the rock exercises were the best part of this workout.  #BurpeeLoveHate
    • No Mahatma today, so I believe it was Tool that took home the prize of WOD crusher.
    • Pay attention to what Abacus wears.  He gets it.
    • I did my best Cowbell impersonation and wore flip-flops to the workout.  Difference is that I worked out instead of drinking an umbrellaed libation and looking on.  Baby steps.  (If Shorty is reading this, this is where he says “I think you mean Cowbell steps.”)
    • 2 Rounds = 120 burpees which we all did correctly and can count toward the June ISI challenge of 10,000 merkins.

     

     

     

     

     

  • Memorial Day Murph

    Growing up, Memorial Day represented the first weekend of summer.  This was the first time we would pack up the car, hitch up the boat, and head to Lake Norfork on the eastern side of the Ozarks; a ritual we would repeat every weekend until Labor Day.  I loved Memorial Day and hated Labor Day.  Labor Day represented the end of summer, the beginning of school, and the end of fun.  Made sense that a holiday celebrating work would represent all those terrible things.  Also appropriate, Memorial Day represented freedom.  School was out.  It was time to be care-free and head to the lake.  I had a good understanding that Memorial Day represented freedom, but I never considered the cost associated with that freedom.  And that is unfortunate, because that is what the holiday is really about.

    So for Memorial Day 2018 F3 New Orleans did our best to recall the sacrifices made.  We, like many others around the nation, completed a Murph.  A Murph is a 1 mile run, 100 pull-ups, 200 merkins, 300 squats and a 1 mile run, named in honor of Lt. Michael Murphy, a Navy Seal who lost his life in Afghanistan.  I have feeling the real Murph didn’t modify his pull-ups as much as I did.  Oh and he wore a weighted vest through the whole thing.

    Naked Man Moleskin

    Great showing by the Uptown and World Pax, coming together at City Park.  I was impressed.  Further confirmation that 0530 is the right time to workout on the weekdays:  November Project showed up at 0600 only to find us on the equipment.  It worked out though, mainly because the F3 Pax crushed this Murph.  We were all running our final mile by the time they needed the pull-up space.  Lucky for them, there was no showdown.  Also lucky for us Da Parish and Rudy were not around.  I’m certain they would have broken into song from West Side Story.

    Impressive times by all.  I believe Mahatma and Gabrielle completed it in about 36 minutes. We finished with Mary, culminating in a 21 gun salute of the American Hammer.

    Great way to start the week and honor those who have given the ultimate sacrifice.  Thanks guys.

  • The Dome Patrol

    Nip/Tuck has been leading a band of merry Blue Ridge Runners in a parking garage training run downtown by the dome.  We decided to make it official.  So if you want to attend F3 New Orleans newest AO, meet near the dome at the corner of Poydras and LaSalle.

    This weeks run consisted of the Arena parking garage (3 times) and the Hyatt Parking Garage (3 times).  In all we ran 4.6 miles and my Garmin tells me we climbed 186 ft.  To Tinkle’s point, seems like 6 garages would be a little more elevation, but probably not a lot.  The mileage and elevation gain are approximately equal to leg 9 of the BRR.  In case you were wondering, it’s one of the easy legs.

    We finished up on time and had a COT to make it official.  Come join us.