The idea behind the H8! was to create something challenging that we can use to measure our progress. The inaugural running was in October and results can be seen here. Five men from that first running came out to measure their progress on this brisk morning. Eight others came to test themselves for the first time. No one conquered it that first time, but today was a different story. T-claps to all the participants today. It is obvious that F3 Nola has improved in the last 5 months. Let’s keep pushing each other – accelerate.
Post your results in the comments below to have a record of your progress.
The Thang
Each lap consists of running south to the top of the levee, crossing canal (bear crawling the neutral ground), running south to the bottom of the levee, cross canal and run north to the top of the levee, cross canal (bear crawling the neutral ground), running north down the levee and back across canal to the starting point. At the starting point you do a descending burp and merk pyramid starting at 8 (bupee with 8 merkins, burpee with 7 merkins, …..burpee with 1 merkin)
At the end of the 2nd lap the burp and merk pyramid starts at 7, etc.
The goal is to complete 8 laps in 40 minutes. According to MapMyRun, each loop is approximately 0.4 miles. Therefore, to conquer the H8! you will have to do the following in 40 minutes:
Run over 3 Miles of Hills
550 Yards of Bear Crawls
36 Burpees
120 Merkins
We did AMRAP and then moseyed back to the flag.
Moleskin
I felt like we had a good chance to conquer it today, but our improvement over the last 5 months is more than I thought. The Tough Mudder is in trouble.
Welcome to Triple Shift’s 2.0 Yo-Yo making his initial post at the H8! That’s a nice initiation. Later in the day he called us out for a lack of creativity in his F3 name. If he continues to post, I promise we will try to do better.
T-claps to Yankee for his first appearance at Okwata. Our lack of creativity in naming our FNG was certainly not due to him. Who knows how many laps he could have finished if he hadn’t been thinking of all of the possible types of Shifts we might use for his name.
T-claps to Kimchi for having not missed a workout yet this year. Beyond impressive.
YHC called an audible and changed #TheUptowner plans from Awkward Yoga to The Maltz Challenge. Today, people around the country honored fallen service men by completing the Maltz Challenge. This is a Hero WOD named after USAF Master Sergeant Mike Maltz, who along with five others, was killed in 2003 on a para rescue mission trying to save children in an Afghani Hospital. His grave is inscribed with the phrase “That others may live.” His older brother, who works for the Drug Enforcement Agency, started this challenge as a way to honor those that have been killed in action. Today people around the country participated in remembrance of the sacrifice others have made for us and others around the world.
The Thang
Fireman Carry 100 meters (Frac & Kim, YHC & Triple) or Farmer Carry 50 lbs 200 meters (Torque)
100 pull-ups
50 Dips (we did bench dips)
400m run to playground on opposite side of Pontiff
50 Knees to Elbows (hang from rings and bring your knees up to your elbows)
100 merkins
100 sit-ups
400m run back to the other playground.
We ended with some Vinyasas, including runners pose and the world’s greatest stretch.
Moleskin
Reading through all the information on MSgt Maltz is powerful stuff. I encourage you to do so if you haven’t. In John 15:13 Jesus said “Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends.” The six men killed that day laid down their lives for strangers, sick children that were in desperate need of supplies. MSgt Maltz was 42 years old that day; my age. He had two kids of his own. Many of us would say that we would do what ever was necessary for our own children and I think that’s honest. But would we be able to sacrifice everything for someone else’s children; children we had never met; children from a far away place that shares very little in common with our culture and ideals; children with relatives that might be trying to kill you? That’s what those six men did that day.
It’s not likely we will be asked to do what MSgt Maltz and his comrades did that day. But what we can do is look to put the needs of others ahead of our own needs; loving those around us, even strangers, with sacrificial love; not counting the cost, but giving freely. Let’s condition ourselves to love without counting the cost. Take some time to reflect on I John 3:16-18 today: “By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?”
Great work by all of the guys that showed up to The Uptowner today. I’m really proud to have completed this challenge with you all. Everyone completed it sub 29 minutes. Impressive work fellows.
After laying the guilt trip on Yankee, I got him to finally post at The Uptowner. As lagniappe, he brought a flag. YHC had a goal to meet so I told everyone to pick their rocks, a big one and a bigger one, as they rolled in. The bigger one was to push yourself with. The smaller one was for modification (without having to take the walk of shame).
0530 and it was time to Rock ‘n Roll….something seemed like it was missing though…things felt incomplete…oh well, disclaimer given and let’s get it.
Warm-up COP sans rocks and in cadence: SSH x 20; Windmills x 10; LSS x 15; 8-count Body Builders x 7
The Thang
A close approximation of our Veteran’s Day GRT welcoming party – Deck of Death with flutter kicks with rock held above chest (or head if you are showing off), Squats con roca, Shoulder press con roca (this devolved or possible evolved into a push press for YHC), and 8-count Body Builders.
All reps were in cadence. The face cards represented 10 reps, aces 15 and all others were the card value. The appearance of a Joker meant you did the previous exercise with twice the number of reps.
The goal was to finish the deck, but we finished 7 cards short. Next time it will be less time doing windmills and trying to build a card table and more body builders. Unfortunately, (or fortunately if you like things easy) the first joker came after the 6 of Flutter Kicks and the 2nd was one of the 7 cards we didn’t get to.
Total number of reps (counting 2 reps for each cadence count except Body Builders):
*Note – a full deck w/o Jokers is 99 Body Builders and 198 of the others.
Moleskin
Kimchi showed up part of the way through the deck. That’s what was causing that uneasy something is missing feeling. Fortunately he came on out after oversleeping to push the streak to 41.
Kimchi, 3Shift, and YHC got in a lagnilappe / tour of the new Pontiff benches and trash cans afterwards. Nice work Jennifer Van Vranken.
T-claps to Yankee for making the drive. Now you just have Okwata, The Coastie, and Lafitte’s Plunge left? Speaking of which, by my count, JV is the only man to post at all 11 F3Nola AOs. #Respect
Glad Bubba made it out this morning. It’s like he has a Deck of Death radar.
The GrowRuck is happening June 10th/11th. Start talking it up now! Hopefully the Deck of Death whetted the GRT appetite.
Quick Draw is having his 50th birthday party tomorrow morning at City Park for 0630. Everyone is invited.
Last week I added the Coastie to the Q sheet and jumped on the first available Q. After today, you may not want that to happen again. To prevent it sign up to Q here, dates are available for the rest of the year.
So I rolled in with my cargo shorts, fat tires, spoke lights, and safety vest ready to lead a group of guys that actually know what they are doing on a bicycle and look the part. Much to my pleasure, one of my own was there waiting for me. JV must have heard that a fellow fat tire had the lead today and came out to show his support. YHC started things off with the COT – cause that’s how we roll at the Coastie. After counting to 7 and providing our names, YHC reminded the Pax that today is Valentine’s Day and in that vein shared a part of DREDDs Q-source on the M. The point that I stressed is that in our relationship with our wives, we are either accelerating or decelerating. If we consider ourselves in maintenance mode, then we are decelerating. “The Q never thinks of maintaining his marriage. He always focuses on Accelerating it.”
The Thang
Warm up – Ride to Causeway (1.75 miles) and then re-group for further instruction. At least that was the plan, but not well executed by the Q. At Causeway we happened upon a barricade. Da Parrrrrrish surmised that it must be for vehicles and not bikes, since there was just enough room for a bike to pass. This seemed like perfect logic so we pressed on. As we came to the top of the levee we saw two lights that we thought might be the POPO. It wasn’t, just two fellow bikers. They warned us of another barricade at Cleary (how you know where Cleary is while you are on the lake? I’m not sure.)
Tabata on Wheels – after regrouping I instructed the pax to do 4 minutes of Tabata – 20 second sprint and 10 second coast; repeat 8 times. I planned to start this at Causeway, but while we were talking to the Not POPO, JV took off, fat tires and all. So the first part of the workout became catching up to JV. By the time we caught him we figured we were close enough to Cleary that we should pass that barricade before starting Tabata.
Once we finally started it was glorious. 7 bikers sprinting as hard as they can for 20 second intervals on a narrow lakefront trail in the dark while passing bikers and runners both ways. At one point, one of the oncoming bikers called one of us by name. It must have been a birth name, because I didn’t recognize it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mSC3Z1a-sbg
I adhere to Tool’s philosophy that we should try anything once (except folk dancing and incest). I think the Tabata on wheels is worth trying again, but take that with a grain of salt. I also think working out with the Police Barricades and doing Yoga are worth trying again.
For the rest of the workout, it was everyone at their own pace to the casino. At the Treasure Chest YHC met up with Da Parish, Triple Shift, Woz, and Moped. Apparently Bongo and JV turned around earlier, or were arrested by the POPO, or beat up by some other bikers….I don’t know. Triple Shift and Woz carried on to the next parish, while the rest of us headed back toward Bucktown.
Thanks for letting me lead and remember – if you enjoy the Coastie, sign up to Q.
The sea was angry today, my friends – like JV trying to send back turtle soup at Commander’s. I gave the disclaimer and we started to mosey. We got about fifty feet out from the flag and suddenly, the great beast appeared before us. I tell you he was ten stories high if he was a foot. As if sensing our presence, he let out a great bellow. I said, “Easy, big fella!, we are just crossing over to the other side…but we will be back.”
Warm-up – My take on a deconstructed burpee (been watching a lot of Top Chef) All IC: SSH x 31, Low Slow Squats x 20, Mountain Climbers x 30, Don Quixotes x 15, Imperial Walkers x 30 – can you picture it?
Then we finished the warm-up with 15 8-count body builders (IC, but that should go without saying – GRT!)
Well then, as a result of the body builders, a huge tidal wave of adrenaline lifted us, tossed us like a cork, and we found ourselves right on top of the great beast. We moseyed to the other side and partnered up. I found myself face to face with a blow hole.
Marine Biology 1-2-3
I spent last Thursday in an uncomfortably close COT with Da Parish, Amnesty, and their speedos at Hotlantis, so I regrettably missed Fracsac’s NOLA debut of Burp Back Mountain. Triple Shift seemed excited that he would be doing it in back to back weeks.
Round 1: Pax 1 up and down the great beast 3 times always facing the Angry Sea (aka quadraphilia…sort of). Pax 2 does burpees. Flapjack and repeato until team burpee total reaches 100. Both pax continue quadraphilia until the 6 finishes.
Round 2: Pax 1 bear crawls up and down the great beast 1 time (crawl bear down if you need modification). Pax 2 does Abe Lincolns (aka crossfit merkin – no cheating – it’s an honest merkin – see what I did there), Flapjack and repeato until team Abe Lincoln total reaches 200. Both pax continue levee bear crawls until the 6 finishes
Round 3: Pax 1 is back to the same quadraphilia process as round 1. Pax 2 does squats. Flapjack and repeato until team squat total reaches 300. Both pax continue quadraphilia until the 6 finishes.
Unlike the Seinfeld episode, it was not the great beast that had the obstructed breathing… it was the Q.
Running late, so we had to quickly get to Mitch’s Pull-up Pavilion for a half round of Tabata, so I guess it would be a round of Tab? Sounds like a phrase my mom used after her jazzercise class in the 80s – “a round of Tab for everyone”
A round of Tab – Get after it for 20 seconds and then catch yo’ breaf for 10. 4 rounds consisted of 1) Pull-ups or Bernie Sanders – Pax choice 2) Burpees 3) Freak Nasties 4) Mission Impossible
At 6:14 we headed back to the flag, which was laying on the ground as a result of the extra windy conditions (Lucky we weren’t in a GoRuck – GRT!)
It was at that point that the Pax was going wild. They were all over me. It was like Rocky I. Pyro came up to me, threw his arms around me and gave me a bro’ hug. We both had tears streaming down our faces. I never saw anyone so manly. It was at that moment I decided to tell him I was not a personal trainer!
What did he say you ask?
He told me to “Go to hell!” and took an Uber back to the hotel.
COT – YHC recalled the story of Moses at the burning bush. It was there that God let him know that he had been chosen to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. Moses started making excuses as to why he was not the right man for the job. I think we all have a tendency to be like Moses. We may feel called to something, but then the doubt creeps in…we don’t have the time, we don’t have the right personality, we don’t have the right skills, we don’t like speaking in front of crowds, yadda, yadda, yadda. It’s important to remember to take the opportunities that come our way. We may not know why God put us in this position, or presented this opportunity to us, but it doesn’t matter. All that is important is that God selected us for this very thing – whatever it is. We are exactly who He wants to carry out His mission. We are perfect for it. So don’t let doubt prevent you from carrying out God’s will. Step out in faith, with the confidence that you are the perfect person to do it.
Moleskin
T-claps to Kim-Chi for his 22nd straight post. Only 290 to go.
T-claps to Pyro for reppin’ F3 Jax at Okwata. The Jax Pax should know that he made y’all look good. I hope you enjoyed it brother.
T-claps to Vespa for being a good sport. He rolled in proclaiming a name change. It’s his second time to post, so apparently no one filled him in that name changes are not allowed – other than the regrettable exception made for Out for Crabs. Anyway, Vespa turned to Moped during the workout. Not much different, but has a more derogatory feel when you are addressing him. Probably because it sounds like dope head. Try it: “Hey Vespa!” – “Hey Moped!” Feel the difference? Anyway,here is a video we took of him leaving the workout:
*Disclaimer* YHC is Ghost Writing this BB for the Q, HVAC.
Today is the last day of the MapMyRun Challenge so YHC took the long way to the park. As I jogged up at T minus 1 minute, I saw that the PAX already had their rocks and were circled up ready to start. This was a clue that there would be know time for messing around this morning.
I’ll update this once HVAC sends me the details, but it went something like this:
SSH x 30 IC
Way Backs x 30 IC
Windmills x 30 IC
Freddy Mercurys x 30 IC
Tin Snips x 30 IC (New exercise. Like a Rosalita, except legs stay closer together and you cross them over when you bring them together. Alternate one over the other.
Lionel Ritchies x 30 IC (New exercise. Bicycle, feet straight up in the air – Like you are dancing on the ceiling)
Merkin Planks – 10 Merkins followed by 10 second plank straight into 8 merkins followed by 8 second plank straight into 6 merkins…..finish with 2 second plank.
What The Hell – 10 seconds Downward Dog, 10 seconds Plank, 10 seconds Mission impossible, repeat with no rest for a total of 3 sets. (This exercise was not named until the next time we did it).
Side plank from left elbow x 25 seconds, Side Plank from right elbow x 25 seconds – Repeato
Finally it was time to grab your rock. We had been instructed to go Medium Size.
Put it on The Left Shelf x 30 IC
Put it on The Right Shelf x 30 IC
Alternating Lunges con roca x 30 IC
Low Slow Squats con roca x 30 IC
Then HVAC exclaims “Back on your butt – let’s go again”
Freddy Mercurys x 30 IC
Tin Snips x 30 IC
Lionel Ritchies x 30 IC
What The Hell – most of us were thinking “He forgot the Merkin Plank Torture,” but not one of us spoke up. What The Hell (although it was not called that yet) seemed a much better alternative. We were wrong. We did the Downward Dog – Plank – Mission Impossible sequence 3 times, but as HVAC was counting out the last Mission Impossible he interjected, “since you all are having so much fun, let’s do it again.” Ok, I thought. I can do it again. So Downward Dog – Plank – Mission Impossible, but as he starts counting on the Mission Impossible he says, “let’s do it one more time.” “One more time” he says. Well at least we know it’s the last one. But it wasn’t. Perhaps fueled by the groans from the Pax, HVAC made it his ritual to say “What the hell? Let’s do it again” every time we came within a few seconds of completing the Mission Impossible. I have know idea how many times we went through the total sequence. I am certain I blacked out at one point. I do remember my face starting to go numb…not sure what that was about but it did help me to understand what The Weeknd was talking about. I’m going to guess we did it 9 times?
Side plank from left elbow x 25 seconds, Side Plank from right elbow x 25 seconds – Repeato – (JV engouraged some Leg raises at this point)
A new addition to the rotation – Sit on your six with arms spread and feet off the ground. Hold that position for 25 seconds, or so he said. At this point, we knew he was a liar. We held it for 50.
Merkin Planks – He didn’t forget, he was just saving them. Same thing, start at 10 and descend by 2s.
Lionel Ritchie x 30 IC
Moleskin
This may have been my favorite Uptowner workout yet. This is the kind of workout YHC envisioned when we started the Uptowner. It was a break from the normal routine of the rest of the week, something that gives us some variety. Lots of good core exercises today and What The Hell was epic. I’ll remember that for a while.
T-claps to Tiny Dancer for posting at his second workout in a row. Since he started, he has never missed a workout.
Rumors abound that the Broke Bike Mountain workout is happening on Tuesday. Talk to Triple Shift for details (and the the real name of the workout).
You have until 1/22/17 to order a F3 NOLA shirt. Click here.
See me if you want to sign up for the Darby Challenge. Challenge starts 2/1/17.
“Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.”
YHC likes the reflection this time of year brings, especially in the light of spending time with family and friends. It’s a good opportunity to look back on the past in gratitude and thanksgiving. It’s a time we can learn from our failures and shortcomings. It may in reality just be another day, but the symbolism of New Year’s Day brings a feeling of new birth. From the Christian perspective, the idea of new birth is foundational to our relationship with our Creator. So with a sense of renewal I headed of to Rock City in hopes of getting stronger.
We showed up 14 strong ready to kick the year off right. YHC gave the disclaimer and it was off to the Rock Pile…
COP #1 aka The Warm-up: 2017 is a prime number, so YHC tried to keep the reps prime. There were some gaffes along the way and I’m probably not going to remember it correctly, but let’s give it our best: (All exercises IC) SSH x 31, J-Los x 23; IW x 31; Merkins x 17; Low Slow Squats x 29; Windmill x 13; Forward Arm Circles x 17; Backwards Arm Circles x 17
At the Rock Pile YHC gave direction: Pick a 2016 rock – small, easy to handle, representative of what you were lifting prior to F3 workouts. Pick a 2017 rock – medium size rock representing what you workout with now. Pick a 2018 rock – large rock that represents your goal. Lots of #mumblechatter referring to the 2016 rock as an Uptown rock.
COP #2 – Reflection on Family: We circled up with our 3 rocks of various sizes (except for Rudy who went with equally sized rocks, hoping to keep the status quo in his life). In F3 we commonly express the desire to become better fathers, better husbands, and better sons. As we worked out with the small rock we reflected on not giving up so that we can be better fathers, better uncles, and better mentors to the younger generation. As we worked out with the medium work, we reflected on getting stronger for our wives, brothers, and sisters. As we worked out with the large rock, we reflected on supporting those who have always supported us: our parents, mentors, etc…Since the large rock represented the older generation, there was a lot of #mumblechatter calling it the JV rock.
Shoulder Presses: Small Rock x 31; Medium Rock x 17; Large Rock x 5; Small Rock x 23
Squats: Small Rock x 31; Medium Rock x 17; Large Rock x 5; Small Rock x 23
Rows: Small Rock x 31; Medium Rock x 17; Large Rock x 5; Small Rock x 23
Curls: Small Rock x 31; Medium Rock x 17; Large Rock x 5; Small Rock x 23
COP #3 – Reflection on Friends: Next we reflected on our friends and how we can support them, working together for a common goal. We partnered up. Pax #1 picks a rock of his choosing to do squat presses. Pax #2 picks a rock of his choosing to do lunges – 10 steps forward, turn around and come back. Flap jack upon the return of Pax #2. The goal was to complete 100 Rock Squat Presses as a team. YHC fouled this one up. Should have been 11 lunges instead of 10. Should have been 101 Rock Squats. I also messed up one of the reps in COP #2 stopping at 30 instead of 31 and then doing the one extra after everyone stopped. That makes a total of 3 mistakes (a prime number).
COP #4 – Reflection on Your Relationship with God: We humbled ourselves by getting on our knees for Rock Jack Webbs. One Merkin followed by One rock shoulder press, then 2 and 2, 3 and 3, up to 11. Lots of groans when we started round 11, but 10 is not a prime number. Humble yourself and obey in 2017,
Prime time flies when you are having fun. We returned all the rocks to the pile and sprinted back to the flag. It has become tradition for Cowbell to start slow and then fly by all of us old dudes at the end. Here’s a picture.
Announcements:
Commit to a 2017 goal for the number of times you post and track it here.
Join GroupMe to get in on the #MumbleChatter and enjoy some 2nd F. Download the app to your phone and then email your phone number to nola@f3nation.com. We will then send you an invite so that you can join,
The Pax is fully aware I am trying to get as many miles in as possible lately. After I gave the disclaimer they became worried that we were heading out of the park on the 610 stomp route. No worries, I found another way to get in the mileage.
The Thang
After moseying to the Foundry, we partnered up for the following sets:
10 partner assisted pull-ups
20 box jumps
30 Derkins
20 Pole Dancers
10 Burpees
The exercises could be done in any order. Once complete, the pair runs to the Refinery and does the same set of exercises. Once you finish there, run back and do the same at the Foundry, etc. etc. and so forth. Partners had to stay together, but the race was on to see which pair could complete the most sets. In the end, everyone completed 4, but Bubba and Kim-Chi were the first to finish.
We headed back to the flag for COT where we prayed for special intentions, loved ones, and peace.
Moleskin
Contrary to popular opinion, pole dancers are no fun.
Nothing fancy about this one. YHC needs to lose some weight, so I’ve been trying to get some miles in. Straight out and back along the bayou route as far as you can go in 45 minutes. This also allowed the YHC, Tool, and Rudy to get some miles in against Shorty in this month’s Extra Mile Challenge (Sorry we can’t figure out the app Fracsac). Rudy and YHC ran together and logged 5.7 miles (to the street on the other side of the I-10 overpass and back).
YHC is an idiot. I’m a bleeder and at least once per year, I slice my finger chopping some sort of vegetable. It’s one of the reasons I don’t eat that many vegetables. This year it happened slicing beets the Tuesday before I was scheduled to Q Okwata. I would show you a picture, but I can’t figure out how (good thing Rudy took over as COMZ Q). Anyway, strict doctor’s orders not to use a keyboard for two weeks, hence the late backblast. I really wanted to get it out sooner, but infection could have set in and I could have died of dysentery. So here we are, almost two weeks late.
The Thang
Mosey around the fountain and circle up in the muck for the warm-up COP. It evolved into a half-circle. I was worried it might be an intervention – What had I done? I knew I had at least 3 really stupid exercises planned, but how did they find out? I didn’t write them down anywhere…Am I that predictable?..It must have been the bear crawl route 66…, ah, nevermind it was just the majority of Pax concerned about getting their feet wet and opting for the concrete – pansies. I may not remember all of the exercises that we did, but I do remember we never got into plank. I think it went something like this: SSH x 30; Imperial Walkers x 25; Don Quixotes x 20; Good Mornings x 15; Hillbillies x 25; Seal Jacks x 30
Then YHC decided to try out a new exercise called the Daft Punk from the exicon. I chose it for many reasons: 1. It was leg day. 2. I saw it on the good Reverend’s tweeter feed as he showed the world his weinke prior to his VQ. 3. My 6 year old likes to listen to that band while getting ready for school in the mornings.
The Daft Punk is a 12 count series of lunges that starts with the right leg forward, side, and back and ends with the left leg going back, side, and forward. It blew Cowbell’s mind. Watching Cowbell struggle through this exercise became the best reason to do the Daft Punk. We kept going until Cowbell made through one complete series. I’m not sure how many that was. Probably 15 times.
Next we moseyed to the benches by the fountain for the Fireman’s Fountain. 7 Pax line up on the benches. Half (or I should say, roughly half) do squats while the others do lunges. As many as you can do while one of the Pax fireman carries another around the fountain. When the fireman gets back everyone shifted down a spot on the bench rotation and the man on the end ran around the fountain and prepared to carry the fireman. This continued until everyone got to play the fireman. We had a couple of modifications due to poor size pairings and epic failures, but other than that it was more successful than YHC imagined it would be.
Next we moseyed to the levee for “I Can’t Drive 55.” The title to that stupid song seemed a fitting title for this stupid idea. Run over the levee and do 50 Monkey Humpers on the other side, run back and do 5 calf raises. Go back over the levee and do 45 Monkey Humpers, come back and do 10 calf raises. Similar to 11s, but everything adds to 55.
In the end, everyone did 275 monkey humpers and calf raises for a PAX total of 2475 (Thanks to Shorty and JV for the math on that one).
This left us just enough time to do about a minute and half of Quadraphilia, before sprinting back to the flag for our COT where we fellowshipped and prayed.
