F3 New Orleans

Author: Einstein

  • 7 COOL DUDES

    “temperature wise that is, not demeanor”

    6 Pax showed up on time
    1 Pax showed up late AGAIN. I won’t mention his name. But he likes to sidle-up.

    I was reminded of my university P.E. class, taught by the basketball coach. The DIV I basketball players would always straggle in late.
    The coach would admonish them, “three tardies equal one absence, and one absence equals a tardy.”
    As a “C” student, I could only look around, to see if anyone else was confused by that, shrug my shoulders, and wonder how different things would be if I were 6 foot, eleven.

     

    Anyways…time to jump on the Polar Express. To the best of my recall, here is how it went

    short disclaimer …

    warmup
    all 20xIC; side straddle hops, good-mornings, windmills, imperial walkers, toe touches, butt-kicks, hillbillies, arm circles, single leg lunges, squats, mummy kicks

    mosey to Bedrock; pick up a 10 pound, coarse crystalline texture, gray, limited porosity and permeability, limestone boulder.
    all 20xIC; curls, overhead presses, rows, outward presses

    mosey to the front of the Taj Mahal for the MERKIN HONOR ROLL
    here we have lots of brick pavers, each with a name and date, honoring former St.Tammany Parish school board employees.
    circle up at the flagpole outer ring
    one pax, at a time, bearcrawls in toward the flagpole to a brick, reads the name and from the last two digits of the date, chooses the higher number and this dictates the number of merkins for the PAX to do.
    for example if the brick reads “Joe Joblotz 1930-1967.” We call out Joblotz,Joblotz,… while doing 7 merkins. That pax bearcrawls out. The next pax bearcrawls in, reads the stats off his brick and we merkin to the stat, repeat with each pax taking a turn.
    We got in a lot of merkins, bear crawling, and planking, to keep us warm.

    mosey to the St.Tammany Parish Courthouse promenade
    In forward motion; One Burpee, Two Burpees, Three Burpees, Four Burpees, then up the steps, down the ramp, down the block and around. Repeat four times.
    Then to the benches for 20xIC dips, 20xIC step-ups

    Indian Run back to the trail head

    mary
    20xIC flutter kicks
    20xIC Jane Fondas

    count-o-rama, prayer led by THE MANNY

    Thanks guys, for showing up on this cold day!

  • “Sweet Fancy Moses!” ~George Costanza

    George: Have you ever seen Elaine dance?
    Jerry: Elaine danced?
    George: It was more like a full bodied dry heave set to music.
    Jerry: Did she do the little kicks and the thumbs?
    George: What, you mean you know about this?
    Jerry: For some time. It was about five years ago. I never knew what to say to her
    about it. It was one of those problems I hoped would just go away.
    George: Well, sometimes you can’t help these people ’til they hit rock bottom.

    Hey, Elaine’s dancing is distinctly inferior when compared to a bunch of PAX doing the Frankie-C.

    here is how it went on this beautiful, crisp, November morning:

    short disclaimer

    warmup

    side straddle hops, imperial walkers, toe touches, good mornings, arm circles, lunges, butt-kicks, squats, seal-jacks, Frankie-Cs

    mosey to the “BEDROCK QUARRY”
    each PAX picks out a good sized limestone boulder, for coupon exercises
    elf on the shelf-lower left to upper right then lower right to upper left, squats, rows

    mosey to the back of the Taj Mahal
    trying to incorporate an excersize utilizing these expensive looking parking stops/staunches/balustrades
    YHC tried some isometric arm work using these whatever they are, followed by merkins

    mosey to the front of the Taj Mahal
    circle up by the flagpole – step back to outer ring, everyone in plank position,
    1 merkins each, then everyone bear crawls one pax position counter-clockwise until the circle is complete
    Next, lunge walk in across circle, backwards lunge walk out

    mosey to the back of the St.Tammany Parish Courthouse Annex parking garage,
    backwards lunge walk halfway up the first floor ramp
    turn and sprint up rest of the way
    jog/walk across the second floor ramp
    backwards lunge walk halfway up third floor ramp
    turn and sprint up rest of the way

    on the upper deck, partner up with one pax doing froggy-planks while the other runs down the ramp and backpeddles up. repeat to 100 count on the froggy-planks.

    mosey to the Courthouse East parking lot, trace out the parking spaces with lateral hops for about a city block

    mosey back to the trail head. Mary-out with Jane Fondas, and Nolan Ryans

    count-o-rama, prayer led by The Manny, we bid Thanksgiving adieus and head out to take on the day.

    Happy Thanksgiving All!

  • Octal October & October Surprise

    Octal October & October Surprise

    “And this is what ye have shipped for, men! to chase that white whale on both sides of land, and over all sides of earth, till he spouts black blood and rolls fin out. What say ye, men, will ye splice hands on it, now? I think ye do look brave.” ~~Captain Ahab

     

    So today we ditched the decimal(base 10)counting system and went with octal(base 8) counting. With a twist; If any PAX cadenced 8,9,18,19 we all had to do 10 merkins for punishment.

    Here is a table for reference:
    1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,17,18,19,20 decimal count
    1,2,3,4,5,6,7,10,11,12,13,14,15,16,17,20,21,22,23,24 octal count

    here is how it went;

    short disclaimer

    warmup

    all in OCTAL CADENCE; side straddle hops, imperial walkers, toe touches, good mornings, arm circles, lunges, butt-kicks, squats, seal-jacks, mummy-kicks, high-knees
    we all fumbled the counting one time or another, and thus ended up doing about 120 “punishment for not concentrating”” merkins

     

    mosey to the “BEDROCK QUARRY”
    each PAX picks out a good sized limestone boulder, for coupon exercises
    on the ground for rowing exercise, then up for arm curls, all in octal cadence

     

    mosey to the front of the Taj Mahal
    circle up by the flagpole – step back to outer ring, everyone in plank position,
    10 merkins each, then one PAX jumps up and runs around and up the steps, while the PAX planks,
    repeat until all took their turn
    Next, bear crawl in to the flagpole, crab crawl out, repeat
    Next, 10 burpees

    mosey to the back of the St.Tammany Parish Courthouse Annex parking garage,
    backwards lunge walk halfway up the first floor ramp
    turn and sprint up rest of the way
    jog/walk across the second floor ramp
    backwards lunge walk halfway up third floor ramp
    turn and sprint up rest of the way

    And now….Moby-Dick takes over the queue with his October Surprise: and the PAX is treated to the inaugural launch of SV Pequod, with each PAX member getting the excellent opportunity to drag Capt Ahab on a Nantucket Sleigh ride, and then to play Capt Ahab and be dragged. Much fun and cheering as we all took turns. See picture of Shooter towing two!! And that non-skid surface was not stopping us!!

     

     

     

     

    And the PAX gives YHC a hard time for not knowing the nuances of the novel “Moby-Dick”, but in Catholic elementary school we were not allowed to read anything with “Dick” in it.

    Nice spray-paint job on the SV Pequod, Moby!! You must have used a template.

    mosey back to the trail head.

    count-o-rama, good prayer led by Shooter, we bid our adieus and head out to take on the day.

  • Rock’n’Roll

    Just a few Fred Flinstone quotes to go with today’s Rock’n’Roll:

    Fred Flintstone: Sorry I’m late. Had car trouble, I picked up a nail.
    [Shows everyone a bandaid on his dirty foot]
    Mr. Slate: Thank you for sharing that with us, Mr. Flagstone. May we continue?

    Sharon Stone: Can I get you anything? Coffee?
    Fred Flintstone: Sure.
    Sharon Stone: [seductively] How would you like it?
    Fred Flintstone: In a cup?
    Sharon Stone: Bold choice, Mr. Flintstone! You’ll go far in this company.

     

    Fred would have made an excellent F3

     

    Great weather this morning for the Pax! Here is how it went:

    Short Disclaimer …and lame attempt at business marketing by YHC

    warm-up
    all 20xIC; side straddle hops, imperial walkers, toe touches, good mornings, arm circles, lunges, smurf-jacks, butt-kicks, squats, seal-jacks, mummy-kicks, maybe some high-knees

     

    roll to the “BEDROCK QUARRY”, which before this morning, was called, by The Covington Women’s Auxiliary and Benevolent Society, “Garden of the Month.”
    each Pax picks out a medium sized limestone boulder, for coupon exercises:
    elf on the shelf; to the right…then to the left, over head press, curls, pick up and put down,lunge with boulder in opposite arm.
    I know if Grundy would have posted – he would have chosen the largest, heavy-est, most massive boulder to work out with.

    roll to the school board building (Taj Mahal) parking lot
    pair up, with one Pax doing 2,4,6,8,10,12 BLIMPS, while the other Pax painfully waits in human chair position. Switch roles.

    roll to the front of the Taj Mahal
    circle up by the flagpole – step back to outer ring, everyone in plank position,
    3 of 6 pax bearcrawl across the flagpole area, while the other 3 of 6 pax remain in plank, waiting for bearcrawling pax to arrive, tag, and switch. repeat a few times

    roll to the back of the St.Tammany Parish Courthouse Annex parking garage,

    backwards lunge walk halfway up the first floor ramp
    turn and sprint up rest of the way
    jog/walk across the second floor ramp
    backwards lunge walk halfway up third floor ramp
    turn and sprint up rest of the way

    mosey across the deck and down the stairs to the Eastern Parking lot,
    lateral hop/cross-over, tracing the parking lot striping for about a block

    roll back to the trail head, with a stop for a quick view/explanation of the USGS Benchmark posted in the Old Train Depot wall. Elevation approx 29 feet ASL.

    count-o-rama, good prayer led by Shooter, we bid our adieus and head out to take on the day.

     

     

  • What I Did On My Summer Vacation

    on the first day of my summer vacation
    I woke up…
    then I went downtown…
    to look for a job…
    then I hung out in front of the drugstore

    on the second day of my summer vacation
    I woke up…
    then I went downtown…
    to look for a job…
    then I hung out in front of the drugstore….. “Cheech and Chong, Sister Mary Elephant”

    T-claps to any PAX member who can tell me the job Chong got on his day three.
    And double T-claps to any PAX member who can tell me who Sister Mary Elephant was substituting for.

     

    The PAX, on their Summer Vacation…traveled Route 66. Starting with One Burpee at the first station, we headed to the next station,
    increasing the burpee count by one, for a total of 66 burpees per PAX member at 11 stations. Or in Einstein shorthand: total burpees=((N*(N+1))/2)

     

    To the best of my recall; here is how it went

    Short Disclaimer …I don’t know why the PAX was laughing at this point

    warmup
    all 20xIC; side straddle hops,windmills,imperial walkers,toe touches,hillbillys,arm circles,lunges,side straddle hops in squat position

    mosey to the school board building (Taj Mahal) parking lot
    Two Burpees
    pillar push for 20 count; rinse and repeat x3

    mosey to the front of the Taj Mahal
    Three Burpees
    circle up by the flagpole – step back about 5 yards out
    bearcrawl in, shoulder taps, crawlbear out, merkins; rinse a repeat x3

    mosey to the back of the St.Tammany Parish Courthouse Annex parking garage,
    Four Burpees
    backwards lunge walk halfway up the first floor ramp
    turn and sprint up rest of the way
    Five Burpess
    jog/walk across the second floor ramp
    Six Burpees
    backwards lunge walk halfway up third floor ramp
    turn and crossover hop up rest of the way
    Seven Burpees

    on the top deck of the parking garage
    enter Senor oCho nUeve, just in time for…
    Eight Burpees
    some more merkins
    scout run across the parking deck with front man sprinting out 10 paces, turn around then queue at the back of the line
    Nine Burpees

    mosey to the front of the St. Tammany Parish Courthouse
    circle up around the military monuments
    merkin and fiddler crab crawl counter-clockwise,9 more merkins all around the cicle
    merkin and fiddler crab crawl left clockwise, 9 more merkins all around the cicle
    Ten Burpees

    mosey back to the trail head
    ELEVEN Burpees

    mary
    20xIC bicycles
    20xIC dollys

     

    count-o-rama, prayer led by Grundy, we bid our adieus and head out to take on the day.

     

  • “For duty and humanity” ~ Moe, Larry, and Curly

    A PAX of six posted today

    here’s how it went:

    salutations

    short disclaimer

    warmup
    20xIC side straddle hops
    20xIC arm circles
    20xIC imperial walkers
    20xIC toe touches
    20xIC hillbillys
    20xIC squats
    20xIC buttkicks
    20xIC zombies
    20xIC seal jacks

    mosey to the back of St. Tammany Schoolboard TajMahal
    stops and starts; run up and backpeddle 2,4,6,8 parking spaces
    at posts: leg swings; left and right
    stops and starts; lateral hop 2,4,6,8 parking spaces
    at posts: leg swings; front and back

     
    mosey to the front of St. Tammany Schoolboard TajMahal
    circle-up around the flagpole, the group does one merkin…and holds in plank position, while one PAX jumps up, runs up the stairs, down the stairs, around and back into position
    group does one merkin, and the next guy runs the loop – did this for each member of the PAX
    next; form a circle about 10 foot radius from flagpole, bearcrawl to flag pole, shoulder tap, reverse bearcrawl back to starting point.
    next; form a circle about 20 foot radius from flagpole, bearcrawl to flag pole, shoulder tap, reverse bearcrawl to starting point.

     
    mosey to the back of the St. Tammany Parish Courthouse Annex parking garage
    back peddle half way up the first floor ramp, turn and sprint up rest of the way
    jog across the second floor ramp,
    back peddle half way up the third floor ramp, turn and sprint up rest of the way,
    on the top deck of the parking garage
    4x sprint across the width of the deck, derkin, and burpee at 4 points per sprint

     

    mosey down the stairs to the “Noodling for Rats” ledge
    5 pull-ups, 20 rocky balboas
    …around this point, Tanked-up tells Moby that he has a nice butt. The PAX is stunned into silence. YHC is worried that Tanked-up is not getting enough oxygen. But for “duty and humanity”  we continue…
    5 pull-ups, 20 mini box jumps

     
    mosey to the front of the Courthouse, circle up around the flagpole for a few merkins, bear crawlin clockwise,
    a few more merkins bear crawling counter clockwise

     
    mosey back to the trailhead, sans flag, for forty seconds of Mary
    chose to do bicycles

     

     
    count-o-rama, lead-out prayer by Grundy

     
    Fun!

  • Napoleon Dynamite: “How long did it take you to grow that mustache?” Pedro: “A couple of days.”

    A PAX of nine posted this day with an age spread from 17 to 67…so we had something for everyone today, working on our “skills.”  “You know, like nunchuck skills, bo hunting skills, computer hacking skills. Girls only like guys who have great skills.”

    So with the stoicism of Pedro, we took off, and here’s how it went:

    salutations

    short disclaimer

    warmup
    21xIC side straddle hops
    21xIC lunges
    21xIC imperial walkers
    21xIC toe touches
    21xIC hillbillys
    21xIC squats
    21xIC buttkicks

    mosey to the front of St. Tammany School Board TajMahal
    circle-up around the flagpole, the group does one merkin…and holds in plank position, while one PAX member jumps up, runs up the stairs, down the stairs, around and back into position
    group does one merkin, and the next guy runs the loop – did this for each member of the PAX
    next; form a circle about 10 foot radius from flagpole, race bearcrawl to flag pole, crab crawl back to starting point.
    next; form a circle about 20 foot radius from flagpole, race bearcrawl to flag pole, crab crawl back to starting point.

     
    mosey to the back of the St. Tammany Parish Courthouse Annex parking garage
    lunge walk backwards half way up the first floor ramp, turn and sprint up rest of the way
    jog across the second floor ramp,
    lunge walk backwards half way up the third floor ramp, turn and sprint up rest of the way,

    then on the top deck of the parking garage
    4x sprint across the width of the deck, derkin
    next; modified grizzly/indian run, with last man in line doing a burpee on “grizzly” command, then run to first position
    I forgot to say “grizzly” most of the time, but everyone got the idea.

     

     

    mosey down the stairs to the “Noodling for Rats” ledge
    5 pull-ups, 20 curb hop/toe taps
    repeat

     

     

    mosey to the front of the Courthouse, for lateral bench hops on your own

     

     

    mosey back to the trailhead flag for few minutes of Mary
    360 planks x5
    one arm planks, left then right

     

    count-o-rama, name-o-rama, lead-out prayer by MobyDick, we bid adieu

    Welcome FNG…..El~Kid

    Happy Birthday MobyDick at 67 !!!

     

     

    “April hath put a spirit of youth in everything.” ― William Shakespeare

     

     

  • Chilly at the trailhead this morning. Sure and Begorrah!

    A Pax of five posted today, with Tanked-Up showing up late…some lame excuse about his diarrhea. He was dealt 10 demerits

    here’s how it went:

    salutations

    short disclaimer

    warmup
    20xIC side straddle hops
    20xIC arm circles
    20xIC imperial walkers
    20xIC toe touches
    20xIC hillbillys
    20xIC squats

    mosey to the St. Tammany Courthouse
    merkin, derkin, erkin, burpee at bench intervals, run up the courthouse steps
    down the courthouse steps and around the block — repeat four times

    mosey to the back of the St. Tammany Parish Courthouse Annex parking garage
    run backwards half way up the first floor ramp
    turn and sprint up rest of the way
    jog across the second floor ramp,
    run backwards up third floor ramp , turn and sprint up rest of the way,
    20xIC Tanya Hardings
    20xIC Lunges
    20xIC Nancy Kerigans (same as the Tanya Harding – but knees bent)

    on the top deck of the parking garage
    sprint across the width of the deck, then merkin
    sprint across the width of the deck, then derkin
    sprint across the width of the deck, then erkin
    sprint across the width of the deck, then burpee

    down the stairs to the “Noodling for Rats” ledge
    5 pull-ups, 20 curb hop/box jumps
    repeat

     
    mosey to the front of the St. Tammany Parish Courthouse
    lateral bench hops X20

     
    mosey back to the trail head

    mary
    each PAX chose an excersize;
    v-ups, wife pleasers & leg lifts, long stretch, putins, hello dollies
    Tanked-up got another 10 demerits for looking up Turbo’s kilt.

     
    count-o-rama, lead-out prayer by MobyDick, we bid adieu

  • “I am tomorrow, or some future day, what I establish today. I am today what I established yesterday or some previous day.” ― James Joyce

    A Pax of four showed up today, Our fearless leader TurboTax could not make it for Q…something about his fitting appointment for the REX ball. Whatever… so this second-stringer had to Q on the fly.

    here’s how it went:

    salutations

    short disclaimer

    warmup
    20xIC side straddle hops
    20xIC arm circles
    20xIC imperial walkers
    20xIC toe touches
    20xIC hillbillys
    20xIC mountain climbers
    20xIC imaginary kettle ball pickups, alternating leading leg
    20xIC one leg lunge with back leg up on bench, alternating leading leg

     

     
    mosey to the school board building (Taj Mahal) parking lot
    run the parking spaces, ladder sprint up 2 spaces, backpeddle 2 spaces, repeat for 4,6, & 8
    10xIC leg swings left to right, right leg
    10xIC leg swings left to right, left leg
    run the parking spaces, ladder sprint up 2 spaces, backpeddle 2 spaces, repeat for 4,6, & 8
    10xIC leg swings front to back, right leg
    10xIC leg swings front to back, left leg

     

     
    mosey to the front of the Taj Mahal
    circle up by the flagpole – step back to the outer edge of the circle
    one leg bearcrawl, with right leg up in the air, bearcrawl hop forward to the flag pole,
    do one merkin
    one leg crabcrawl, with right leg up, crabcrawl hop backward to edge of circle,
    jump up and run the stairs, up and around and back
    rinse and repeat with left leg up on the bearcrawl and crabcrawl

     

     

    mosey to the back of the St. Tammany Parish Courthouse Annex parking garage
    run backwards half up the first floor ramp
    turn and sprint up rest of the way, stop and do five burpees
    jog across the second floor ramp, stop and using cement walk, do a compass derkin, with 5 derkins every 45 degrees, so basically,
    your feet stay in position while arm walking to the left and right
    run backwards up third floor ramp , turn and sprint up rest of the way, stop and do five burpees

    on the top deck of the parking garage
    sprint across the width of the deck, then 10 merkins
    sprint across the width of the deck, then 10 derkins
    sprint across the width of the deck, then 10 erkins
    sprint across the width of the deck, 10 count

    down the stairs to the “Noodling for Rats” ledge
    5 pull-ups, 25 curb hops
    repeat

     

     
    mosey to the front of the St. Tammany Parish Courthouse
    circle up around the flagpole, merkin and bearcrawl around clockwise, merkin and bearcrawl counter-clockwise

     

     
    mosey back to the trail head

     

     

    mary
    20xIC Jane Fondas
    10XIC V-ps

     

     
    count-o-rama, lead-out prayer by Tanked-Up, we bid adieu, we “establish” our day

  • “I’m out there, Jerry. And I’m loving every minute of it!” ~Cosmo Kramer

    A Pax of four showed up today under the Gipper statue to “love every minute of it.”

    here’s how it went:

    salutations

    short disclaimer

    warmup
    20xIC side straddle hops
    20xIC windmills
    20xIC imperial walkers
    20xIC toe touches
    20xIC hillbillys
    20xIC sealjacks
    20xIC imaginary kettle ball pickups, alternating leading leg
    20xIC one leg lunge with back leg up on bench, alternating leading leg

     

     
    mosey to the school board building (Taj Mahal) parking lot
    run the parking spaces, ladder sprint up 2 spaces, backpeddle 2 spaces, repeat for 4,6, & 8
    10xIC leg swings left to right, right leg
    10xIC leg swings left to right, left leg
    run the parking spaces, ladder sprint up 2 spaces, backpeddle 2 spaces, repeat for 4,6, & 8
    this sprint was a competition run for the Pax with Tanked-Up coming in first place, no doubt he had Frosted Flakes before posting.
    10xIC leg swings front to back, right leg
    10xIC leg swings front to back, left leg

     
    mosey to the front of the Taj Mahal
    circle up by the flagpole – step back about 3 yards out
    pushup and bearcrawl clockwise, pushup at quarter hour marks while bear crawling all around the clock
    circle up by the flagpole – step back about 6 yards out
    pushup and bearcrawl counter-clockwise, pushup at quarter hour marks while bear crawling all around the clock

     

    mosey to the back of the St. Tammany Parish Courthouse Annex parking garage
    run backwards half up the first floor ramp
    turn and sprint up rest of the way
    jog across the second floor ramp
    run backwards up third floor ramp
    turn and sprint up rest of the way

    on the top deck of the parking garage
    sprint across the width of the deck, then 10 merkins
    sprint across the width of the deck, then 10 derkins
    sprint across the width of the deck, then 10 erkins
    sprint across the width of the deck, then 10 toe taps

    down the stairs to the “Noodling for Rats” ledge
    5 pull-ups, 10 box jumps
    5 knee-ups, 10 box jumps

     
    mosey to the front of the St. Tammany Parish Courthouse
    20xIC bench hops, with arms on the middle of the bench, legs on the ground, hop to the other side
    10xIC burpees

     
    mosey back to the trail head

     

    mary
    20xIC Jane Fondas
    20xIC Ted Turners
    one set of Breathing 100’s, start on sixes, then legs slightly up, and head and shoulders slightly up, arms outstretched, breath in on 5 count, breath out on 5 count

     
    count-o-rama, prayer led by Tanked-Up, Q assignment for next time, we bid our adieus and headed-out to take on the day.