The number 40 is clearly a big deal–it shows up in some of the most important events in Scripture, and it’s a turning point in the lives of most people. So, this day being that turning point for YHC, I decided to take a dive into some of those important events and make at least one of the PAX puke in the process.
If you translate the number 40 from the original Hebrew, it technically means “a friggin’ long time,” as in, “It rained for a friggin’ long time,” or, “The Israelites were in the desert for a friggin’ long time.” Hence, the theme of the following routines (after a warmup of the usual, including suggestions of a more efficient combination of some of the favorite exercises, such as “Moroccan Self-Love,” the image of which continues to make YHC laugh out loud at inopportune times, like in church the next day):
Noah’s Ark:
YHC decided to honor a few of the animals who took that famous ride, and the PAX lined up in the outfield to do 40 steps forward and 40 steps backward of the following:
bear crawls, crab walks, duck walks, and inchworm merkins.
Backward duck walks burned, and backward inchworm merkins required more coordination than most of the PAX could muster, but they will definitely be used again in the future.
Exodus:
After being freed from Egypt, crossing the Red Sea on dry land, their enemies being completely destroyed, being fed miraculously every morning and evening, led by a pillar of fire by night and cloud by day, the Israelites struggled to have faith that God could lead them to inhabit the land He promised. After sending a group of spies to reconnoiter the land, they came back with a report, that despite the land being amazing, it would be impossible to take because of the large race of people living there. Because of their lack of faith and obstinance, they then had to take a roundabout route that took them 40 years to complete before faithful men finally led them to conquer and inhabit the land.
Moseyed to the lower field, and after an explanation of the meaning and origins of the word “reconnoiter” and a challenge from Paradox to Enron to read a book every now and then, the PAX partnered up for the following:
Partner 1–run to the outfield fence (from the outside) and do 20 squat jumps (squatting behind the city walls and leaping up to take a peek at what’s inside).
Partner 2–chilly jacks until partner returns with news from all the reconnoitering.
Once both partners have completed the squat jumps, it was an Indian Run to the Thunderdome, which was right behind us, but, of course, we had to take a roundabout route to the street and around the front entrance of the park first.
Temptation of Jesus in the Desert:
After eating nothing for 40 days and 40 nights (“a friggin’ long time”), Jesus was very hungry, and after this exercise, the PAX would be very winded. 10 burpees EMOM for 4 minutes = 40 quick burpees. YHC had originally considered more, but was grateful for only 40 after the previous exercises and in the thick humidity. Yankee Joe took this opportunity to “boot” for the first time that day (literal translation = “reconnoiter the inside of a toilet bowl”), which reminded him of his college days, and after which he jumped right back in with renewed vigor.
40 Days between Easter and Ascension:
During the time period after the Resurrection and before the Ascension, a few of the apostles went fishing, caught nothing, and after being directed by a mysterious person on shore (Jesus) to throw their nets on the other side of the boat, they hauled in 153 large fish. So, after moseying to the chimney, we used the letters in the word FISH, to complete 40 reps of the following:
Frogs (Crunchy variety): OYO, 1 is 1
Imperial Walkers: IC, 2:1
Squats: OYO
Hand-release Merkins: OYO (x33 to add up to 153)
Barnabas:
June 11 is also the feast day of the Apostle Barnabas. Though not one of the original 12, he was Paul’s main companion for most of his journeys, many of which ended in some rough treatment. So, the PAX partnered up again for three rounds of partner carries, 20 yards out, flapjack, and 20 yards back (40):
1. Fireman’s Carry (over the shoulders)
2. Wheelbarrow
3. Partner Drag (wrap around from behind, heels dragging)
Paradox claims to have a clear path to heaven now that he’s carried a priest (Cardinal) on his shoulders.
40 Finisher:
YHC took it right up to the limit with nine rounds of Tabata, 40 seconds work, 20 seconds rest:
flutter kicks, squats, merkins, LBC’s, lunges (front to back), shoulder tap merkins, hello dollies, side lunges, and Maktars.
Time got away from YHC, and we started the run back to the flag at 7:30. The PAX assumed the 40 theme was being taken to the extreme with a 7:40 finish, but despite YHC’s birthday priveleges, breaking protocol (on purpose) is prohibited.
COT and Cardinal prayed us out.
YHC was surprised by a gift from the PAX presented by Paradox: a gift-wrapped, monogrammed coupon! I’m not sure whether to mount it over the mantle or to use it exclusively at all following beatdowns, but I was deeply touched and continue to be grateful that these men are willing to stay the path of hard growth with me week after week. The brotherhood is deep and much appreciated, gents!
P.S. Heck of a job, Yankee Joe! He may have “booted” multiple times, but in returning today after having been out for months, he pushed through and finished strong, and YHC is honored to now be a member of the 40-and-over club with him.
SYITG,
Goose
