Mobile Super Spartan CSAUP

Pre-Thang

Five brave men set out to accomplish the unthinkable, a 9.7 mile race with 24 obstacles, swamps, bogs, frigid water, sandy terrain, elevation changes, and slow pokes hogging the trail.  YHC and Amnesty road tripped it to Mobile the night before.  Hawgcycle stayed with the in-laws in Biloxi.  Reluctant Yankee and Mr. Awesome traveled together the morning of the race.

We all tested our skills at the mini rope climb and scoped out the dust bowl where spectators gathered before lining up to race.  The PAX had some pre-run jitters not knowing what to expect in the gloom ahead.  After a quick waiver signing and listening to an energetic MC with American Flag with rip offs give a “be careful” spiel, we set off into the unknown.

The Thang

Mr. Awesome and Hawgcycle took off in the beginning while YHC, Reluctant Yankee, and Amnesty kept a slow and steady pace.  The first few obstacles were pretty straight forward.   YHC displayed why the name “Splash” was given after diving into the deepest section of the first frigid cold water crossing.  Learning to traverse the outside edges of the swampy areas didn’t take long after witnessing multiple runners get trapped nearly chest deep in tar/mud.

The first 2.5 miles were relatively easy until coming upon 3 back-to-back obstacles that involved a straight gassing of the forearms:

1. Zig Zig Walls – scale around the walls without touching the ground or grabbing onto the top
2. Hercules Pull – lift heavy object (~80-100lbs) into the air hoisted by a pulley and gently set back down
3. American Ninja Warrior Monkey Bars – start at one end and get to the next without touching the ground
   1. TCLAPS to Amnesty for being the only member of the PAX to complete while the rest did 30 burpees

After our arms felt like Popeye, there was a nice mosey with a water station to rehydrate.  At this point YHC, Reluctant Yankee, and Amnesty took off to get in front of the slow groups who apparently walked the entire race.

Around mile 6, Amnesty’s achilles began to act up probably due to the 2.5 straight miles of sand and elevation changes.  YHC and Reluctant Yankee carried on through the bucket brigade (fill up 3 gallon bucket with dirt and walk a loop only to dump it back out where you started) letting Amnesty take a breather.

Within the next mile YHC and Reluctant Yankee caught up with Hawgcycle at the 10 foot wall jump.  TCLAPS to Hawgcycle for going the last 5 miles without a shoe sole.  Apparently, gorilla glue on old shoes while running through knee deep bogs isn’t the best idea.  Coming down from the wall jump Hawgcycle got a calf cramp.  The three of us stayed together for the next mile until reaching the infamous Spartan Javelin throw.  This obstacle has an 86% fail rate, and 100% of the PAX failed.  30 burpees for all.

At this point, YHC got his 4^th or 5^th wind and took off for the remaining 2.5 miles of the race.  The last 3 obstacles consisted of a 20 foot rope climb, up and down large dirt mounds with cold water ravens, and lastly a fire jump.  Mr. Awesome finished the course in 2 hours and 25 minutes so he was there cheering us all on.  The rope climb took down two members of the PAX, Hawgcycle and Amnesty.  30 more burpees fellas.

Other than some barbed wire nicks, thorn bush scrapes, and fatigued muscles, we made it through.  TCLAPS to Mr. Awesome for finishing 2^nd overall in our heat and 6^th overall for men in the afternoon heats.

Post-Thang:

Immediate post run consisted of a free beer sponsored by Shock Top, a finishers t-shirt and medal, and hose down rinse off.  The PAX loaded up for the ride back to NOLA.  We made a BBQ stop at the Shed off of I-10.  Mr. Awesome threw a fit that the Michigan vs Michigan State game wasn’t being played on the main TV.  What can you say?  It’s the SEC, and Bama is playing A&M.  Sorry, Awesome.  The Wolverines really needed you in the last 10 seconds.

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