So the Superbowl must of set some pax back….. probably nursing there hangovers, and even though YHC valiantly tried to pre-blast and exclaim that this was the kickoff to his birthday (the following day) celebration, only two pax showed in the gloom.
Warm Up:
Being that it was Valentine’s Day YHC began with a loving beatdown set to the classic romantic tune “Sexual Healing” by Marvin Gaye! The two pax faced each other in plank position and gazed into each other’s eyes, only to be interrupted each time Marvin sweetly crooned out “baby” and the pax would preform a Merkin. When the soothing sounds of “Sexual Healing” where whispered the pax would then preform a burpee. After 4:06, upon the songs conclusion, both pax coldly and tiredly looked at each other in the same manner that a couple looks upon each other right before they head into divorce court…..
YHC then transitioned into the birthday story of YHC life, after-all this was the day before his 38 birthday;
Each milestone was associated with an exercise, then like the passing of the years, the pax took a lap around the circle sidewalk.
YHC was born in Ohio in 1984, so the pax performed 1 lap; 9 merkins; 8 squats; 4 v-ups.
lap
The next milestone was at the age of 3 moving to upstate New York. So 3 Newtons Cradles.
lap
At age 6 YHC moved to Detroit MI. So the corresponding exercise was 6 Derkins.
lap
At age 12, there was a move back to Ohio. So 12 lunges, there was a reason that it was lunges, but in my advanced age, I’m having trouble remembering the reason….I hate lunges……
lap
At 18 YHC joined the Navy. The first assignment was attending training to become an Interior Communication Electrician. So like any good Electrician, we avoided getting ‘shocked’ by ‘jumping’ out of the way with 18 SSH! Then YHC attending Special Warfare School, were many flutter kicks were preformed, so thus 18 flutter kicks!
Lap
At 19, YHC became a father, and he set himself in that predicament by preforming a series of moves, sooooo this milestone exercise mimicked the event that allowed him to be a father; 19 monkey HUMPERS.
Lap
Sadly, YHC first marriage ended in a divorce, so this round was a backwards sprint to the stage, much like being set back in life. But it’s okay, he turned himself around, so at the stage the pax turned around and sprinted towards a new…well a new exercise!
At 24 he met his ‘solid’ mate, so much like her being the ‘core strength’ of his life, the pax planked for 24 seconds.
At 27 he married this strong women, so to symbolize her strength the pax bear crawled around the shovel flag 3 times. No, its not because his M has a morning attitude worthy of a gumpy bear, parish that tought!
For the next two milestone events, the births of his youngest daughters he asked his 3.0’s what their favorite exercises where;
At 30 YHC welcomed Addy, aka “Doctor Barbie” (at least in the FIA circles) and she gladly exclaimed “Squat Thrusts” so 30 squat thrusts it was!
At 33 YHC welcomed Lorelle, the third 3.0, and a true wild card. When YHC asked her what her favorite exercise was, she simply ran over to a brick in the flowerbed and began to pick up this coupon in a manner that resembled an upright row, so 33 coupon rows it was!
The last exercise, was the last day of being 37 years old, so AC/DC “Thunderstruck” was turned on, and both pax preformed 37 Burpee’s.
Ended with a COT and Coffeteria at Front Street Starbucks.
