It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair…for Fracsac apparently. The man who has a folder on his phone dedicated to the Freedom Hammer was crestfallen for a second year running. Bordering on tearful, Fracsac and his Southshore breathern had to witness a spritely Speedy Gonzales hoist the Freedom Hammer in triumph after the Northshore thumped the Southshore for the Crazy Ivan IV, 257 to 153. Precision results, thoroughly vetted and audited by the governing body, are as follows:
1. Speedy Gonzales 31:22 (6:30 average pace)-recruited years ago by Jose 10k
2. Amnesia 33:55
3. In Time 34:07
3. Cowbell 34:07
5. The Hammer 34:34
6. Saban 35:09
7. Kuch 35:37
8. Steve 36:45
9. TankedUp! 37:20
10. RevSox 37:36
11. Sogo 37:47
12. Hog’s Breath 40:25
13. Thumb War 41:30
14. Bongo (time between 41:30 and 42:43-you should have found me afterwards Bongo!)
15. Snooze 42:43
16. Pelican 42:44
17. Shooter 43:34
18. Flea 45:16
19. BBQ 46.35
20. Russo 46:55
21. Jose 10k 47:38
22. Pai Gow 49:55
23. Baywatch (it was raining hard, lots was happening, Hog’s Breath was talking to me…sorry Baywatch I didn’t get your time)
24. Belloq
25. JV (not that JV, the other one) 55:19
26. Kenner Brah
27. McGiver
And honorable mentions to PickAxe and Chainsaw, The Hammer’s 2.0s, who finished the first lap together in a blistering 13 minutes.
Thanks for coming out guys. You all get a trophy for participating in this unequivocally, completely stupid and utterly pointless annual competition. YHC was thoroughly impressed with the total disregard for your personal wellbeing and safety and looks forward to a repeat performance same time next year. Over and out.
